30 Survey Results That Sound False But Are Actually True

Tyler Durden's picture

Submitted by Michael Snyder of The Economic Collapse blog,

You will be shocked at what some Americans actually believe. 

For example, close to 90 percent of us believe that we are eating a healthy diet, and yet more than third of the population is officially obese.  65 percent of all Americans say that they are dissatisfied with the government, and yet nearly a third of us would be willing to submit to a "TSA body cavity search" in order to get on an airplane. 

As you will see below, Americans are angrier and more frustrated with government and with their lives than ever before, but we also exhibit almost unbelievable levels of sloth and apathy.  Some of the numbers below are quite funny, and others are absolutely stunning.  But they all say something about who we have become as a nation. 

The following are 30 survey results that sound false but that are actually true...

#1 According to a recent Rasmussen Reports survey, 52 percent of Americans "do not think the economy is fair to those willing to work hard".

#2 70 percent of all Americans do not "feel engaged or inspired at their jobs".

#3 According to another recent Rasmussen Reports survey, 59 percent of Americans believe that "less government involvement in the economy" would help reduce the size of the income gap in this country.  (And those 59 percent are actually correct.)

#4 20 percent of all government workers and 26 percent of all Obama supporters consider the Tea Party to be "the biggest terror threat" that America is facing.

#5 Approximately 30 percent of all American workers have $1,000 or less saved up for retirement.

#6 A worldwide survey conducted by the Worldwide Independent Network and Gallup found that 24 percent of people around the world consider the United States to be the biggest threat to peace.  Pakistan was in second place with just 8 percent.

#7 60 percent of Americans report feeling "angry or irritable".  Two years ago that number was at 50 percent.

#8 36 percent of Americans admit that they have yelled at a customer service agent during the past year.

#9 29 percent of Americans believe that "cloud computing" involves an actual cloud.

#10 A survey of employers that currently pay minimum wage to at least some of their employees found that 38 percent of them would start laying off employees if the minimum wage was raised.

#11 One survey found that 56 percent of Americans believe that it is okay for the government to track "the telephone records of millions of Americans" in order to keep us safe.

#12 When George W. Bush was president, 61 percent of Democrats considered NSA surveillance to be "unacceptable", but now that Obama is in the White House, only 34 percent of them consider it to be "unacceptable".

#13 67 percent of Americans support the use of unmanned drones in "homeland security missions" inside the United States.

#14 One survey found that 51 percent of all Americans agree with this statement: "it is necessary to give up some civil liberties in order to make the country safe from terrorism."

#15 Close to one-third of all Americans would be willing to submit to a "TSA body cavity search" in order to fly.

#16 65 percent of Americans are dissatisfied "with the U.S. system of government and its effectiveness".  That is the highest level of dissatisfaction that Gallup has ever recorded.

#17 Only 8 percent of Americans believe that Congress is doing a "good" or "excellent" job.

#18 70 percent of Americans do not have confidence that the federal government will "make progress on the important problems and issues facing the country in 2014".

#19 According to a survey conducted by the National Geographic Society, only 37 percent of all Americans in the 18 to 24-year-old age range can find the nation of Iraq on a map.

#20 Close to 25 percent of all Americans do not know that the United States declared independence from Great Britain.

#21 Right now, 29 percent of all Americans under the age of 35 are living with their parents.

#22 According to one survey, 24 percent of all U.S. teens that have a sexually-transmitted disease say that they still have unprotected sex.

#23 Approximately one out of every five teenage girls in the United States actually wants to be a teenage mother.

#24 The percentage of Americans that "believe there are signs that aliens have visited Earth" is actually higher than the percentage of Americans that believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God.

#25 According to one recent survey, only 35 percent of all Americans say that they are better off financially than they were a year ago.

#26 It is hard to believe, but 56 percent of all Americans are considered to have "subprime credit" at this point.

#27 89.7 percent of all Americans believe that they are eating a healthy diet.  Meanwhile, approximately 36 percent of all Americans are obese.

#28 44 percent of all Americans do not have a first-aid kit in their homes.

#29 48 percent of all Americans do not have any emergency supplies stored up at all.

#30 53 percent of all Americans do not even have a 3 day supply of nonperishable food and water in their homes.  What will they do when a major crisis or emergency strikes?  Do they actually believe that the government will swoop in to save them if something happens?

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prains's picture

You will be shocked at what some Americans actually believe. 


I thought it was they were #1 and that's all that mattered

GetZeeGold's picture



My head just exploded....if you find a piece.....please mail it to me.

prains's picture

ground, air or bitcoin?

Manthong's picture

We are surrounded by a horde of complete One Delta Ten Tango’s.

jwoop66's picture

Aliens just snatched a plane out of the sky!!   Its been on the news for weeks!   Duh!

Four chan's picture

why have the masses always been incurably ignorant?

boogerbently's picture

I'm SO sick of #2.

More nanny state, everyone gets a trophy BS.

It's not your jobs JOB to "inspire and engage" you.

James_Cole's picture

77 percent of all Americans “believe there are signs that aliens have visited Earth”, and according to a recent Harris poll only 68 percent of all Americans believe that Jesus is God or the Son of God. 

Now that's some funny shit right there, only ~32% of the population is sane (at best)?

Bollixed's picture

Certainly not the latter...

BringOnTheAsteroid's picture

I thought this was at least a step in the right direction. There is at least a small probability that aliens actually exist.

Againstthelie's picture

And I'm sick if the stupidity of the people.

The whole democracy-thesis that the majority was always right, is a lie. Invented by legacy-hunters that tell their mentally handicapped victim how intelligent and clever it was.

Yes_Questions's picture



Anunnaki manipulated DNA.



cynicalskeptic's picture

why have the masses always been incurably ignorant?


.....because stupid people breed without thinking......  they do pretty much EVERYTHING without thinking....  

Therefore you have a LOT more stupid people than intelligent ones (and those running things prefer it that way - it's far easier to manipulate and control stupid people than smart people).


jeff montanye's picture

part of it is when the president can say things like "I believe ultimately that by working together, China and the United States can help strengthen international law and respect for the sovereignty of nations and establish the kind of rules internationally that allow all peoples to thrive," and not as a joke.

no one coughs and says "tibet" or "iraq" or "afghanistan".

well the u.s. installed government of afghanistan said this: Citing “the free will of the Crimean people,” the office of President Hamid Karzai said, “we respect the decision the people of Crimea took through a recent referendum that considers Crimea as part of the Russian Federation.”

so that's at least a little funny.

StychoKiller's picture

Hmm, so Idiocracy is truly a documentary, then?  Whocouldanode?

DeadFred's picture

I heard it was raptured

GeorgeHayduke's picture

If so, that means all those pious christians who thought their cars would be "unmanned" after the rapture are still here with the post-rapture rabble. What a fitting outcome.

post turtle saver's picture

it takes a lot of stupid people to maintain mass delusion

Tall Tom's picture

You poor confused soul.


There was this man who was driving and his tire went flat. He pulled up on the side of the road to change out the tire for a spare. He parked right next to an irrigation ditch filled with water. Beyond the ditch uphill there was an Eight Foot high Chain Liknk Fence topped with a Barbed Wire Barrier. He was parked right next to the State Hospital for the Mentally Deranged. There was an inmate at the fence who was watching him.


So the man opens his trunk, pulls out the Spare Tire, the Jack, and the lug nut wrench. After jacking up the car he pops the Hubcap and removes the lug nuts, carefully placing the lug nuts into the Hubcap so they can easily be retrieved. He pulls the flat tire off of the car and walks over to put it into the trunk in the place where the spare tire had been.


But in doing so he accidentally kicks the hubcap, with all of the lugnuts, into the filled irrigation ditch which sank rapidly to the bottom.


Now just imagine yourself in that situation. How would you feel? Pissed? Well he was. Pacing back and forth and kicking at the ground he was in a quandry.


Then the Crazy Man yelled at him through the fence. The crazy man said, "Sir. I can help you."


Knowing that he had parked next to the State Mental Hospital the Driver exclaimed, "You?!? You can help me? You are a fucking nut. You are locked up in that Hospital. There is nothing that you can do to help me you worthless piece of shit!!! What a fucking nut!!! Just what in the hell can a fucking nut like you do to help me?!?"


The nut calmly responded, "If I were you I would take off one lug nut from all of the other tires and use them to mount your spare tire. Then I'd drive into town and get my tire repaired and buy some lug nuts. You know? Sir? I may be crazy but I am not fucking stupid."


Just who was crazy?

post turtle saver's picture

there is no God, your story proves nothing

Tall Tom's picture

Even if I presented the Probability Mathematics you would not understand. You cannot understand Math.


Few solved my problem below.


Nobody has even told me what a Logarithim is. Nobody has diffentiated Principle with respect to time in the Principle-Interest Rate- Time Problem published below.


You, as one of my favorite atheists has defined, are merely subnuman if you cannot understand Math and you are not worthy of my time if you cannot.


(An innumerate on a Financial Blog...What is next???)

MontgomeryScott's picture

BUT... BUT...

With GOOGLE GLASS and embedded electronics, my car will soon REALLY be unmanned, as it drives itself down the highway! I'll be sitting in the back seat, snorting whatever, and playing with whomever, as my car hurtles through space and time towards my destination, and i will give my rememberance to my weird belief that I will get to watch as 'all those others' are burned and judged, as I sit comfortably looking down at humanity as it dies.

Wait, baby... yeah, that feels good. that feels REALLY good! You'd better stop, now...

(here it comes)

Oh, GOD!

(How did THAT feel?)

I felt like I died and went to Heaven, baby... (she smiles up at me, taking her index finger and flicking it up at her mouth, wiping my love off of her face)

Meanwhile, my GOOGLE car keeps driving along, no one in the front seat, as I trust it to bring us to our destination... unmanned, and the front seats empty...

Pre, Post, Mid? My mind still reels, as my lover gently dresses me in the back seat, and I make a mental note to donate another 'seed-offering' to the current replacement-theologist of the day. Which experience was 'better' for me? I still can't decide, as I relive all the moments from erection to stimulation to ejaculation, and decide that the moments afterward, here with my sweet lover who is now looking at me quizically, are perhaps better than believing in a god which takes some for no apparent reason, and kills others without trial or consideration.

I reach up, and pull down the telescreen, and cancel the payment to Joel Osteen... as I realize that I too was misled...

A Nanny Moose's picture

1 in 10 believe HTML is an STD

Keyser's picture

Another few generations and the sheeple will willfully accept cranial implants at birth, believing it to be for the ultimate good of society. 

TheReplacement's picture

Aren't you the optimist...  It'll happen in less than 10 years.

GeorgeHayduke's picture

Actually it seems that their craniums are already implanted...in their rectums. For outcasts like me it's been apparent for quite some time. Polls just confirm the obvious.

zorba THE GREEK's picture

50% of Americans want to stick their penises in the other 50% of Americans.

That statistic overrides all other statistics.

Vampyroteuthis infernalis's picture

50% of Americans want to stick their penises in the other 50% of Americans.

Unless you are in San Francisco and that number drops significantly.

boogerbently's picture

84% of ALL statistics are completely made up.

Gaius Frakkin' Baltar's picture

32% of people believe 84% of ALL statistics are completely made up.

Pool Shark's picture

All generalizations are false: including this one...


countryboy42's picture

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

EricArthurBlair's picture
“I only believe in statistics that I doctored myself”

? Winston Churchill

chapaev's ghost's picture

In San Francisco, 50% want to stick their penises in 84%.

edotabin's picture

"My head just exploded....if you find a piece.....please mail it to me."


This just in: 92% of American believe a piece of your head will actually be found


401K of Dooom's picture

My head exploded when Obama was reelected.

StychoKiller's picture

That wasn't really that shocking, given that the other "choice" was the Romneylan.

Was was shocking was Justice Roberts applying pretzel-logic to Obamacare.

detached.amusement's picture

indeed, facepalming, you have got to be fkn kidding me, our country really doesnt even have one legitimate branch of government shocking...

The Gooch's picture

#31 The ones that do are terrrrrists!

ILLILLILLI's picture

#32 Israel must be allowed to do whatever it wants because they are The Chosen People, and if we don't, Jesus won't return to the world.

LetThemEatRand's picture

American exceptionalismTM

TM:   Oligarchs.  Dumbing down the population since 1913, and making them damn proud of it.   

StychoKiller's picture

"When a candidate for public office faces the voters he does not face men of
sense; he faces a mob of men whose chief distinguishing mark is the fact that
they are quite incapable of weighing ideas, or even of comprehending any save
the most elemental — men whose whole thinking is done in terms of emotion, and
whose dominant emotion is dread of what they cannot understand. So confronted,
the candidate must either bark with the pack or be lost... All the odds are on
the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre — the man who can
most adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum. The Presidency
tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office
represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward
a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will
reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a
downright moron." -- H.L. Mencken, Baltimore Sun, 1920

all-priced-in's picture

More than half of all Americans have below average intelligence.

LetThemEatRand's picture

IQ has little to do with it.  Propaganda works well even on very intelligent people.  Especially when they are motivated by their own sense of superiority.  Example:  Ayn Rand.

john39's picture

Orwell thought that the only hope was with the working class... as the professional class would be too attached to the perks the system affords them.

Stares straight ahead's picture

Clearly, you have a mastery of math.

chapaev's ghost's picture

Clearly, you have a mastery of humor.