• Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.
  • Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.

"Scared" Gartman Bottom Ticks Market With Uncanny Precision... Again

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Yesterday, when we commented on the bloodbath going on in the hedge fund space, someone asked if a hedge fund mauling is an indication of a market bottom. We replied no, and clarified as follows: "The bottom tick sign, if any, is that Gartman just went mega bearish..."

Yup: the infamous, and infallible, Gartman contrarian indicator had just struck again.

Ironically it was merely days earlier on April 1, when Gartman collected his daily $200 CNBC appearance fee, saying that "experience tells him to stay bullish on stocks", and that it's foolhardy to fret about the fundamentals of the economy adding that "Here, write this down: The stock market will stop when it stops, and not a moment before. It's moving from the lower left to the upper right," Gartman said. "Enjoy the ride!"

Fast forward to Monday when we got the following pearl:

In a reversal of his more bullish take on U.S. equities in recent weeks, Dennis Gartman said Monday that he's getting out of equities and sticking with cash and gold to ride out the recent pullback, which he called a "long-awaited and much-needed correction."

 

On CNBC's "Fast Money" on Monday, the editor of the Gartman Letter said simply, "I got scared."

 

Gartman said that Friday's action made it seem as though a switch was flipped in the minds of investors. "The whole world switched at that period of time," he said.

 

That same switch evidently dimmed Gartman's view of stocks as well; he pared down his exposure to equities from an average of 100 percent, to close to zero.

 

...

 

"You don't need to be short, but you don't need to be long at this point. I think cash is the right place to be," he said.

 

...

 

In Monday's issue of "The Gartman Letter," Gartman said he couldn't recall "a time in our history of trading when we've seen such unanimity of trend reversals" as was observed on Friday. "Indeed, the changes were material enough and important enough to mandate that action be taken to reduce our exposure to everything we have on, save for positions in gold," he said.

Ah, to have Gartman's magical VWAP algo that allows him to get out of all stocks into all cash in the span of hours. But then again one doesn't need VWAP or any other WAP when one "transacts" in monopoly money. Further, here was his commentary from his April 8 "Gartman letter":

STOCKS: The Trend’s Still Up But the Sidelines Seem the Better Place To Be: We’ve gone to the sidelines as the market “reversed” to the downside last Friday and seems intent upon tracing out a monthly reversal too, although it is far, far too early in the month to make that statement now and to give it great credence. But with the 100 and 200 day moving averages so far below us and with the market’s propensity to put the 100 day moving average to test we’ve taken to the sidelines… and we’re rather comfortable there… at least for now.

For those curious, here is the entire clip:

 

So what happened next? This:

 

Then again, none of this should be a surprise. Recall:

And so on.

We were wondering what we would do in the absence of Tom Stolper's impeccable genius of picking FX inflection points, we are, however, lucky to still have Dennis.

So this Bud's for you, real man of contrarian genius - we hope you remain as long of CNBC appearances (in $200 appearance fee terms) as is possible, sharing market inflection points with laserlike precision.

Luckily if Gartman is ever barred from appearing on CNBC, there is always a backup plan:

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Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:36 | 4640707 FilthyHabits
FilthyHabits's picture

What a crack head...

Arm Yourselves..

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:43 | 4640734 Murf_DaSurf
Murf_DaSurf's picture

 

 

 

Gartman is *simply* the *best* Fade trade in the World!

 

He's better than any ol' Goldman Muppet Buy/Sell Rec !

 

He makes a Cramer Fade look unpredictable !

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:46 | 4640752 SloMoe
SloMoe's picture

Nobody beats the Cramer fade. Nobody...

 

Cramer, FTW!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:48 | 4640757 Algosaurus Rex
Algosaurus Rex's picture

You have NO IDEA what it's like out there! NO IDEA!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:55 | 4640786 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Kass, paging Doug Kass - third stooge, ur up!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:01 | 4640817 Algosaurus Rex
Algosaurus Rex's picture

Art Laffer is on deck...

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:09 | 4640851 synergize
synergize's picture

Now I see why people pay $150 / month(?) for his newsletter - you can't go short Dennis Gartman if you dont know what he's saying...

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:40 | 4640959 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

$150 a month? For "Lower Left to Upper Right"?

Good work if you can find it.

ROFL

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 18:07 | 4641030 bania
bania's picture

Lower Denis to the upper Gartman

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:10 | 4640861 macholatte
macholatte's picture

 

Tyler:

Is there anyone who is not a contrarian indicator, who actually does get it right +60% of the time?

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:15 | 4640873 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

My favorite actual Cramer line:

I blew Foster Wheeler and i'm not proud of it

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:20 | 4640887 synergize
synergize's picture

LOL

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:37 | 4640943 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

5:30PM, someone just dumped a few thousand gold contracts. Went from +$3.20 to -$3.30 in one flash. So much for fidiuciary duties.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:31 | 4640924 DoneThis2Long
DoneThis2Long's picture

wonder if FW was sporting a smile thereafter?!

lol

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 18:50 | 4641147 lotsoffun
lotsoffun's picture

i'm fairly desperate at times, but i'm not sure i want garden gnomes anywhere near me, let alone my best bits.

 

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 00:49 | 4642197 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

When Lawn Warriors Strike: how to survive

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 18:52 | 4641153 Moon Pie
Moon Pie's picture

Favorite Cramer Line:  "Nobodys gonna continue paying $2 for average Starbucks coffee."  Circa 2003.

He added a bunch of other Cramerisms panning SBUX, then at $24.  Closed at $70 today.

Buffoon, I tell ya, the man is a Buffoon!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 20:37 | 4641477 caShOnlY
caShOnlY's picture

Favorite Cramer Line: "Nobodys gonna continue paying $2 for average Starbucks coffee." Circa 2003.

He's just early in his call.  Where is Starbux going to be when the world is back on REAL MONEY and all the credit cards are vacuumed out of the sheeple's wallets?

He added a bunch of other Cramerisms panning SBUX, then at $24. Closed at $70 today.

Hmmmm...... QE double double anyone?  

I admit the man is moron, but then again isn't anyone who touts this market on TV?  I give Cramer one small credit though, in 2008 when the market was crashing he did advise anyone who was retiring in the next few years to GET OUT!!!  He quickly went back in the dumper when he began saying "just a trillion for wall st" and we can make this go away in late November 2008!!

 

 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:02 | 4640824 Soul Glow
Soul Glow's picture

Free Jon Corzine!  He should be on Wall Street ripping people off like he used to!  Why let Gartman, Kass, and Cramer have all the fun?

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:55 | 4640788 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

I don't watch the cartoon channel so don't know who this Gartmun character is.

 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:09 | 4640858 Squid-puppets a...
Squid-puppets a-go-go's picture

I bet his entire Au holding is paper

theres no way a chump like this would be in physical gold

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 21:41 | 4641687 fockewulf190
fockewulf190's picture

I´ve heard him say he owns gold in yen more than once. 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:12 | 4640869 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

Assman Speaks! Again!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:56 | 4640790 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The entire economy has become a bipolar, schizophrenic basket case, with no one really knowing how it's all *relatively* treading water, while the hull of the economic ship, in reality, takes on more and more water.

There aren't any rational "investors" out there. There are only insiders, people playing with OPM, and degenerate gambling junkies.

All the Fed's manipulations and BigGov's manipulations of everything from banks, to interest rates, to subsidies (to rich and poor alike), to tinkering with energy credits, the tax code, etc. have only made things more bipolar and schizophrenic.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:03 | 4640829 Soul Glow
Soul Glow's picture

Thank you fluoride.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 22:10 | 4641797 fockewulf190
fockewulf190's picture

And we still have 3 more years of Obama.  There is no way on Earth this shitstorm is going to be held off until he gets to jump ship.

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 00:45 | 4642193 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

SOLD! I'll buy that for a dollar!

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 04:08 | 4642332 Seer
Seer's picture

If it appears irrational it's because it's dealing with the irrational: The perpetual-growth-on-a-finite-planet system's head is exploding (over it having no growth to feed it).

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:12 | 4640870 WSMassiv
WSMassiv's picture

The only thing that was missing was the eye twitch...

I add it in my memories, makes me laugh thank you..

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:49 | 4640762 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

Dear Tyler,

Could you give us a warning the next time Dennis turns bullish, so we can all short the hell out of the market?

Thanks,

Shark

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:59 | 4640805 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

Gartman = dweeb.  Look it up.  Love me some contrarian indicators.  Now that Kudlow is toast I gotta look elsewhere.  Thanks for the new standard.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:59 | 4640807 holmes
holmes's picture

"So this Bud's for you, real man of contrarian genius - we hope you remain as long of CNBC appearances (in $200 appearance fee terms) as is possible, sharing market inflection points with laserlike precision."

The Tylers' have taken snarkiness to new heights. It's why I love this site.

Thanks Tyler.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 18:49 | 4641143 Remington IV
Remington IV's picture

CNBC's " Fast Money" crew =  Chimp City

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:44 | 4640962 mtndds
mtndds's picture

what a tool.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 20:21 | 4641416 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

The stopped having Ralph Acampora coming onto CNBC when he made bad predictions back at the start of the 2000 tech bubble bust.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 23:51 | 4642085 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Ralph IllmakeUpoorer & Ron InsaneA should have started a hedge fund together.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:37 | 4640712 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

I cannot wait until he goes full retard.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:39 | 4640718 Algosaurus Rex
Algosaurus Rex's picture

You mean he hasn't already?

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:39 | 4640725 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

He is nearly there.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:42 | 4640738 Algosaurus Rex
Algosaurus Rex's picture

Keep me posted...

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:43 | 4640743 Soul Glow
Soul Glow's picture

Lookup full retard in the dictionary and there is a picture of Dennis Gartman.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:38 | 4640715 i_call_you_my_base
i_call_you_my_base's picture

Hahaha! Jackass.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:40 | 4640726 10mm
10mm's picture

Priceless and worthless. 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 18:27 | 4641085 aVileRat
aVileRat's picture

Fucking love that 8am perfect convex dump that can only be done when a desperate seller overloads the book. Somewhere is a really dumb looking agency trader who was suckered into the squak box.

Stay Awesome.

 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:40 | 4640727 Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

The fact that this guy makes more than 99% of us, really goes to show just how stupid this has all become.

 

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:44 | 4640745 FilthyHabits
FilthyHabits's picture

Does it really matter what you make when you end up becoming a complete immoral fucktard that has genital herpies and anal warts from all the parties he thinks we're a good idea?

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:50 | 4640772 i_call_you_my_base
i_call_you_my_base's picture

You can tell he's a miserable human being. Cares more about money and fame than anything real. I'm sure he hates his life.

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 17:50 | 4640975 knukles
knukles's picture

Sounds more like one of my ex-bosses ... hating his life ... Maybe my old boss was too narcissistic to not know to hate his own life ...
Huh..

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 20:30 | 4641451 villainvomit
villainvomit's picture

Dennis Ass Wartman.........  Good one FilthyHabits!

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 16:40 | 4640729 Soul Glow
Soul Glow's picture

Gartman is the new Cramer.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!