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Ex-Chairman Of Insolvent UK Bank Busted For Possession Of Cocaine, Ketamine And Crystal Meth

Tyler Durden's picture




 

About a month ago, English bank Co-Operative Bank plc, which in October was handed over to bondholders in order to plug a 1.5 billion pound capital shortfall and which added last month it will need to raise an additional 400 million pounds to plug another funding shortfall related to legal and restructuring costs, surprised its brand new owners with news that its full year loss would be a massive $2.2 billion. However the bank's insolvency was just the beginning, and the biggest surprise was not to be unveiled until today when UK prosecution charged Paul Flowers, the banks' former chairman from March 2010 until June 2013, and a Methodist minister, with possession of cocaine and ketamine. Oh and crystal meth.

Bloomberg reports that Flowers, 63, is scheduled to appear at a criminal court in Leeds, England, on May 7 to face the charges, the U.K. Crown Prosecution Service said in a statement today. Flowers, who was arrested in November as part of a drug investigation after he was filmed buying crack cocaine by a U.K. newspaper, was released on bail, West Yorkshire Police said in a statement.

“I have concluded that there is sufficient evidence and it is in the public interest to charge Paul Flowers with possession of Class A and Class C drugs relating to an incident on Nov. 9, 2013,” prosecutor Clare Stevens said in the statement.

And while everyone enjoys mocking the tabloids, guess who broke the story: "Regulatory and government probes are also in the works after the Mail on Sunday newspaper reported Nov. 17 that Flowers bought crystal meth and crack cocaine."

“At the lowest point in this terrible period, I did things that were stupid and wrong,” Flowers said in the November statement. “I am sorry for this, and I am seeking professional help, and apologize to all I have hurt or failed by my actions.”

As for Flowers, he is sorry: "Flowers apologized for his conduct in a statement after his arrest last year, saying there had been a death in the family and pressures related to the bank.

That... and the monkey on the back.

As for seeking professional help, he can talk to Bubba in prison if he would be willing to become his personal bodyguard, as he will need it. Unless of course the UK legal system is as broken as that in the US, in which case Paul's sentence will be 3 hours of community work and a promise never to look at blow again.

 

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Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:20 | 4665704 VD
VD's picture

just legalize all drugs and jail the banksterz!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:25 | 4665723 Occident Mortal
Occident Mortal's picture

In the UK he WILL get community service. Probably 150 hours of community work (7 hours every second Saturday) and a fine of maybe £500 to £800.

He certainly won't be going to jail for possession of drugs. This isn't Texas.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:26 | 4665755 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Planted evidence vs. Wacked?

He got off easy!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:27 | 4665765 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

 

 

Maybe he had a boring job?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:29 | 4665771 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Or they are questioning the testimony of a future witness with character assasination?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:30 | 4665776 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Silk Road is for banksters too!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:32 | 4665792 Four chan
Four chan's picture

those drugs are big in the gay community, i wouldnt be surprized if some jim baker activity was going on.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:37 | 4665820 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

Ketamine is a drug used in human and veterinary medicine, primarily for the induction and maintenance of general anesthesia, usually in combination with a sedative. Other uses include sedation in intensive care, analgesia (particularly in emergency medicine), and treatment of bronchospasm. Ketamine has a wide range of effects in humans, including analgesia, anesthesia, hallucinations, elevated blood pressure, and bronchodilation.[2]

Molly geez!!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:40 | 4665829 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Yep. That's why it's called "Special-K"

But it probably makes it a lot easier to use a staple gun on yourself!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:42 | 4665852 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

Hey,

A guy's gotta make a living !!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:45 | 4665868 remain calm
remain calm's picture

Is he related to the wolf on wallstreet?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:50 | 4665896 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

He spent the weekend with Rob Ford in Toronto last year.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:15 | 4666013 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

WINNING!

Thu, 04/17/2014 - 03:49 | 4668546 0z
0z's picture

Defrauding people of their money can certainly be considered criminal. Snorting the money is not the reprehensible part. The crime is that he stole it. People are free to put whatever they want to put in their body. What the hell is Tyler trying to say? Are plants Evil Tyler?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:43 | 4666346 813kml
813kml's picture

Based on the picture they could be doppelgangers.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:52 | 4665913 knukles
knukles's picture

Ketamin my ass.  Stuff for pussys and lightweights.  A real man ingests unlimited amounts of Haldol.  Ah, the calm of the Haldol daze.  Not to mention the unrelenting supply of other goodies, like two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, laughers, screamers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get into locked a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge, and I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon.

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:08 | 4665984 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

and THEN it was discovered "the Bank had a few issues."

Unfortunately the regulator was also the dealer so it took a while to unravel the mess.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:14 | 4666007 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

What, no Krokodil?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:46 | 4666157 aVileRat
aVileRat's picture

Kroc is only for russian bond traders. And closers.

Real deal guys, like Knuck don't have time for that stuff esp. when they are in the middle of bat(shit crazy Yellen) country. Never stop in the middle of a Taper, even for MOMO hitchiker accounts.

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:59 | 4666497 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

thanks knuck for the hat tip to fear and loathing in las vegas.  hunter thompson deserved to have his remains rocketed out of here.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:12 | 4665998 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

Geez with the coke and meth you'd think he would've been a lot skinnier...

Funny, I could manage to deal with a death in the family w/o having to resort to looking for my local (filmed) pusher. Politicians are just actors who are too ugly for film.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:17 | 4666017 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

C'mon Knuckles -- where is the attribution?  Huh?

It is obvious to many, but still.

Thu, 04/17/2014 - 05:32 | 4668626 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

Dr. Hunter S. Thompson....fear and loathing on Zerohedge.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:23 | 4666049 BandGap
BandGap's picture

........and the goddamn bats!

I miss the good old days.

BTW - ether will give you a monster headache.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:27 | 4666056 americanspirit
Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:59 | 4666767 Rusty Shorts
Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:31 | 4666073 Gamma735
Gamma735's picture

Watch out for the desert bats.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:34 | 4666088 bilbert
bilbert's picture

+100

P.S.  The good Dr. should need no reference on ZH...........

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:00 | 4666230 yabyum
yabyum's picture

The good Doctor would have raged if he were alive today.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:47 | 4666447 Boozer
Boozer's picture

Knuck, that's how Hunter S loaded up for a road trip!  True professional degen.

Ahh, how I wish I were young again.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:08 | 4665982 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

 

Exactly. 

At least with this he's found honest work.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:41 | 4665843 Charles Wilson
Charles Wilson's picture

He said he was sorry.  Maybe he just had a bad day.

If we could just walk a mile in his shoes, I believe that we would understand him a lot better!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:59 | 4665949 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

he is a crystal methodist!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:45 | 4666713 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Ding ! We have a winner, ladies and Gents. Too cool for school.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:04 | 4665964 oddjob
oddjob's picture

Walking a mile would have killed him.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:35 | 4666389 Charles Wilson
Charles Wilson's picture

Where's Jack LaLanne when you need him?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:37 | 4665822 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

I thought coke and meth users wouldn't be fat bloated bastards like this double chinner tard!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:46 | 4665874 replaceme
replaceme's picture

He needs to smoke more, that pudgy bastard...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:47 | 4665881 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

That guy has to score dime bags on the street??    Maybe he never lost the habit(s)

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:19 | 4666030 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

David Feldman used to a bit about obese people and cocaine: 

What do they cut their coke with?  BUTTER?!!?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:05 | 4666257 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Looks like you thought wrong again.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:46 | 4666718 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Maybe the crank was for his boyfriend. Those Ministers are pretty weird, you know.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:46 | 4666159 Superdude
Superdude's picture

It's only gay if you smile while giving a bj for meth.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:29 | 4665772 Stackers
Stackers's picture

Hallucinogens + speed ..... this guy had one hell of a party in mind

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:27 | 4665763 Honey Badger
Honey Badger's picture

Hell, he should run for mayor of Toronto.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:54 | 4665926 Seahorse
Seahorse's picture

House Harkonnen

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:30 | 4665783 Bangin7GramRocks
Bangin7GramRocks's picture

Fuckin' ministers. See what the bible does to people!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:33 | 4665796 Four chan
Four chan's picture

"the religious" you cant trust them, ever.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:56 | 4666961 css1971
css1971's picture

The religious are by definition, the most delusional of the delusional.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:33 | 4665800 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Are you a minister too?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:44 | 4665858 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

I believe Methodists accept "gay", therefore, he doesn't follow the Bible.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:17 | 4666009 GoinFawr
GoinFawr's picture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sc859Go0VNU

Thank jesus dinosaur taming tap dancing christ Noah wasn't a methodist then

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:32 | 4666069 GoinFawr
GoinFawr's picture

From your link:

"I’m officially Jewish but I’m Jewish in the same way the Olive Garden is an Italian restaurant..."

Hahahaha! Just like Jesus!

Sold!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:56 | 4666482 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

.

Jewish in the same way the Olive Garden is an Italian restaurant...

Not kosher then...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:54 | 4665921 Tom_333
Tom_333's picture

I was just wondering where my daily bankster had gone?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:55 | 4665931 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

..... nice doube chin.... he looks like he could fit right in with "The People of Walmart."

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:09 | 4665980 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Banksters need Ketamine in order to rape the clients effectively. He must be "doing" a lot of "banking" these days. 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:40 | 4666116 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

He should sue the BOE for the QE program that allowed him the funds to buy the drugs. 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:20 | 4665707 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

That Ketamine shit is nasty !!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:21 | 4665717 VD
VD's picture

k-holes for a-holes.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:26 | 4665754 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

So did he do it for realz or another banker taken down? Whatever, I score it as a win.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:35 | 4665807 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Dunno. If "they" want to take a bankster down, that might be a useful snitch we should help out. 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:43 | 4665801 GoinFawr
GoinFawr's picture

You know you're too heavily into decadence if you consider it 'treating yourself' to experience a 72 hour nightmare...sKetchy

Still, I'd wager he preaches some wild sermons

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:45 | 4665862 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

The K could be for someone else...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:02 | 4665894 GoinFawr
GoinFawr's picture

Good point, after all he's a Methodist, not a Baptist.

"More sinister than minister..." -Chris Tucker

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:34 | 4665802 Four chan
Four chan's picture

k hole for the b hole, hes a butt rustler.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:37 | 4666099 Bunders
Bunders's picture

Horses for courses, pun intended. (It's a veterinarian and battlefield anaesthetic. Battlefield because it doesn't lower blood pressure in cases where there is a likelyhood of significant blood loss and veterinarian because animals don't complain about hallucinations)

Used sparingly (In sub hallucinogenic doses), however, it can provide (to some but not all people, genetic lottery) near immediate and long lasting (about 10 days) relief from major depression, especially in cases that don't respond to traditional first line therapies, such as SSRI.

That said, immoderate use of the stuff isn't likely to do anyone any good.

I assume he was trying to access mental health support from the NHS in the UK. Doing that could drive anyone to crack / meth / heroin and ketamine combos.

NOFX - Kids of the K-hole.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 21:12 | 4667703 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Hmm, Cocaine, meth, ketamine...sounds like a well-diversified portfolio to me! :>D

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:07 | 4666267 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Anything refined sugar, is nasty!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:21 | 4665713 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

"Banking Bad"

Coming to you on Showtime this Summer.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:46 | 4665870 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Excellent. It could be done as a fiction drama series OR it could be done as a reality show, where we follow banksters around as they make "deals," invent "financial products," and take out insurance policies on banksters who later end up nailgunning themselves to death, by accident of course.

They could even develop derivative products related to the show itself to sell to the public. Then they would get the algos to call in and pretend to be watching the slop and voting on things to make the show look even more successful than it is, thus artificially inflating the show's standing. Then they could "short" the show, just before they schedule a long lecture on how all of this actually works, boring the fuck out of everyone. Then the public and the phoning algos would vote for more nail gun episodes, and the algos would know about the votes before hand so they could front run the show's ratings pop again...

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 21:14 | 4667710 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Yo, Hollywood is looking for creative screenwriters...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:15 | 4666008 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

Totally!!  Banzai, are you taking this down?? Lloyd Blankfein with his tongue out fer sure. None of the banksters have facial hair tho-- who's gonna be Walter?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:23 | 4665715 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

WOW !!!

Was this for personal use or for an income stream ?

No doubt he was rehypothacating that shit and cutting it up and selling it as a new type of MBS.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:24 | 4665734 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

I've had days like that... not!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:22 | 4665719 Occident Mortal
Occident Mortal's picture

That is the UK criminal code

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:22 | 4665721 Theta_Burn
Theta_Burn's picture

It was clearly the drugs fault..

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:23 | 4665722 stant
stant's picture

Where's the hookers?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:29 | 4665775 Sabibaby
Sabibaby's picture

Mybe if this were Wall Street, I think you mean where's the children?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:23 | 4665724 jcaz
jcaz's picture

Walter White,  bitch....

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:42 | 4665849 orangedrinkandchips
orangedrinkandchips's picture

just getting through the 1st season.....LOVE Walt.....

 

he's the man. "basic chemistry"....lol...yeah

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:23 | 4665729 Conax
Conax's picture

I've seen a lot of meth head's mug shots, but this is the strangest one ever.

Let's have a look at his teeth.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:31 | 4665787 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Yeah it makes you think that he found his drug addictions very recently. One wonders who got him hooked on this shit. You don't wake up one day and decide, "I'm gonna get hooked on crack, meth, AND ketamine!" I would imagine that by the time you are doing all three, you weigh 130 pounds, you've lost half your teeth, and you are dispensing handjobs behind dumpsters.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:54 | 4666748 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Yeah, I agree; it's a blankly astonishing mug shot for a cranker; It really doesn't make sense. I saw a couple of people go down the tubes on Meth. in the City when I was young. What you say is too true. All the booking shots are evidence all by themselves; this guy doesn't LOOK anything like a Meth. Head. Hard to figure.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:23 | 4665732 NOZZLE
NOZZLE's picture

I'm surprised they didn't find kiddie porn on him, he looks like the type.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 20:38 | 4667565 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

They are saving that variation for later? This is becoming worse than a midday soap opera.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:24 | 4665733 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

He's called the "Crystal Methodist" in the UK press.

 

Possession of these drugs in the UK would usually be treated with what's called a caution - "You've been a naughty boy, don't do it again and if we catch you next time we might so something" and perhaps a fine. It would be highly unusual for him to see any jail time.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:24 | 4665737 teslaberry
teslaberry's picture

imagine how much money the bank would have lost if he wasn't doing drugs?

lucky depositers....

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:25 | 4665745 10mm
10mm's picture

He is seeking professional help. Id say personal use. Old head is  parting like it's 1999.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:25 | 4665748 seek
seek's picture

You know, if someone with an umimpeachable character like Ron Paul ran a bank and refused to do something TPTB requested, this is exactly the story we'd read about him. Surprised they didn't find kiddie porn on top of the drugs.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:26 | 4665758 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

Give the drugs to his investors! They need it!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:31 | 4665760 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

And people thought Wolf on Wallstreet was just a funny fictional movie.

 

Speaking of funny, read this Daily Mail piece by Edward Lucas on the Ukraine crisis:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2605578/Edward-Lucas-I-hope-Im-wrong-historians-look-say-start-World-War-III.html

Here is a particularly funny line:

"But the biggest benefit to the ­Russian president lies abroad. He makes no secret of his hatred for the West. He is contemptuous of, yet fears, our soft power. He resents the laws, liberty and prosperity that our citizens enjoy." 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:33 | 4665798 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Yeah, "they hate us for our freedom!"

I guess that bullshit worked once, why not try it again?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:46 | 4665861 walküre
walküre's picture

It would make sense if Putin tried to sober up his own country first. Russians are addicted to alcohol and chemical drugs. Russians are big in the porn industry as well. Prostitution is a very common source of income for female Russians.

Sure, Vlad. Blame the West for all your own fuckups. That worked so well for the other guys during the last century as well when they declared themselves rulers for life and a thousand year reich.

Why so many people simply don't get what Putin is all about is beyond me. He's arguably the richest person in Russia. He has inserted himself to rule Russia with his iron fist without any opposition. Russians who moved into ex Soviet satellite states are motivated to take over those states and declare them Russian. That was Hitler's "Blut und Boden" approach to the letter.

The guy is a bad ass motherfucker and I'm happy to be far away from his sphere of influence. Maybe not even far enough when he goes full ballistic.

Go ahead, fucking junk me. I could care less.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:06 | 4665933 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

To be clear, I don't give a flying fuck about Putin. He is a statist,  just like our power hungry war mongering statists here in the west. I'm just pointing out the hypocrisy of our "leaders" and our  "press". 

 

BTW the author is stating "they hate us for our freedoms" [Now where have I heard that before?], which is ironic that he uses freedom and laws in the same sentence. 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:13 | 4666004 walküre
walküre's picture

I get that part. Our cronies are just as bad. Bundy vs. Fed on orders of Reid is just the latest example.

It's all propaganda. "They hate us for our freedoms" is "Mission Accomplished" in a world where Americans rally behind "Boston Strong" despite the clear evidence to the contrary.

Not you specifically, but for others it seems that Putin is the enemy of their enemy and that makes him their friend. In this case that's a very dangerous proposition imo. If we keep focusing on the abuses of our own cronies and stop them before they even consider another war, we will be much better off in the long run. Encouraging the likes of Putin and supporting him even verbally in his effort to piss off the West is sending the wrong message imo.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:12 | 4666542 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

You make it sound as if "[e]ncouraging the likes of Putin and supporting him even verbally in his effort to piss off the West" is done in isolation. It's just one among many efforts against the DC bullshit and abuse parade. And since said DC bullshit and abuse parade is global in nature, it makes sense to, ahem, understand any external (to the US) efforts to deter it.

Americans will have to clean up their own house and it's in one hell of a mess. We could use all the help we can get.

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:01 | 4666778 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Yes, he's the enemy of my enemy; and according to some of the oldest prtocalls in the human genone, that makes him my friend. Anything is better than forgetting that the Kenyan Mullato is our enemy; and God forgive anyone who thinks he's their friend. I'm definetely supporting Putin in his humiliation of these fuckwads in Washington; there's only two teams on the field, fan boy; who you want to support ? The illegal Kenyan usurper and destroyer of America? I hope not.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:56 | 4665934 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Could you maybe not read so much into everything, and focus on the punchline that was in fucking BOLD?

Geeze, someone makes a joke about freedom, and you gotta set up this big ole straw-man to knock down. WTF?

Here's a clue. Most people around here understand that Vlad is not any different than any other strongman. Those that don't? Just ignore them, as their brains are rotted by statism.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:56 | 4666208 walküre
walküre's picture

Got it. Last time I pointed out the obvious I earned triple digit junks. That's Million Dollar Bonus territory and in this case, I'm quite comfortable with that! You know you're hitting a nerve when... the statists come out from under their rocks!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:57 | 4666760 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Oh, yeah, right; Russians are always terrified of "soft power"; go look at some newsreels of the War on the Eastern Front, and then think this over. Not even slightly believable.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:50 | 4666937 css1971
css1971's picture

Does anyone still swallow that crap?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:27 | 4665761 Duc888
Duc888's picture

 

 

Nice, Ket is usually associated with abduction / kidnapping....etc.  Not exactly a party drug.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:13 | 4666565 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Onward Crystal Methodist...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:27 | 4665762 Iam Yue2
Iam Yue2's picture

What a guy.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:29 | 4665781 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

Never judge a book by it's cover!

He looks like the British actor in the Harry Potter movies.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:31 | 4665788 SoDamnMad
SoDamnMad's picture

2.2 billion loss (or was it a business expense)? That's a lot of crack to which lets check all the transfers the bank made to Cyprus, Caymans, Singapore.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:31 | 4665790 PlusTic
PlusTic's picture

just your average bankster tweaker...don't let the glasses/suit fool you

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:04 | 4666784 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

It fools the shit out of me. Everytime I look at the photo I crack up all over again. I just cannot believe this Mope was a cranker. Just when I thought I'd seen everything. Too funny.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:33 | 4665799 Bam_Man
Bam_Man's picture

He looks just like Dr. Meinheimer from Naked Gun.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:23 | 4666045 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

Yes, but which one?!?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:35 | 4665805 smacker
smacker's picture

Flowers: "there had been a death in the family and pressures related to the bank"

 

Too bad he forgot to mention that the drugs were allegedly used to fire up sex orgies with rent boys.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:39 | 4665830 Phuk u
Phuk u's picture

True Smacker

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:38 | 4665824 Phuk u
Phuk u's picture

This bloke is right up there, he is a shit-shoveller and could not run

a piss up in a brewery let alone a bank. He was once asked by a parliamentary

committee the value/asset of the Co-op bank, he replied about 2-3 billion, which

was about ten times less. A complete knob head and an unbelievable choice to run

(or mis-run) a financial institution.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:42 | 4665851 IndianaJohn
IndianaJohn's picture

I don't know what  ketamine is but cocaine and biker crank (meth) is the formula for a stroke if you are over 45. The portrait don't fit the story either. Unless he had a makeover for the mugshot, even at that.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:52 | 4665905 flacorps
flacorps's picture

Ketamine is very powerful. It can be used while anesthetized for 8 to 24 hours to detox from heroin dependency.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:03 | 4665961 smacker
smacker's picture

Ketamine is used as a horse tranq I believe. I've seen a few people on it and it ain't pretty.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:43 | 4665857 orangedrinkandchips
orangedrinkandchips's picture

So with all these "concentration camp" drugs (where you lose weight cause you dont eat and you look like death warmed-over)......

 

Whats with that chin??? Or, is it a fat ass goiter?

 

you would think he'd be thinner!!!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:45 | 4665863 bardot63
bardot63's picture

This guy will be flying off a roof any minute now.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:46 | 4665865 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

Can I get a toot too?!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:47 | 4665884 mademesmile
mademesmile's picture

Nice! Maybe next time he can score some crokodil and dramatically shorten his life expectancy.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:50 | 4665895 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Sometimes high status men like this may not be using the drug, but procuring it for their boy-toys who like to party this way. Black mail can happen too.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:51 | 4665901 Inthemix96
Inthemix96's picture

And you lot think your lot of filthy criminals know the 'Craik'?

This is England my friends, if they arent kiddie fiddling, or covering it up, look at the news about one fat bastard Cyril Smith, re-hypothocating, mortgage fraud, Libor fraud, insider dealing, flogging the publics assets to their mates for nowt (Royal Mail), abusing children, outright expenses theft of whatever ammount they like, getting smashed as fuck on any type of drug they please, shagging rent boys with our money, and fucking the working bloke over thrice, or even paedophilia, they wouldnt have any time left to run this Dog forsaken cuntry.

My lot of bastards have your lot licked.

;-)

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:21 | 4666035 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

Not that I would wish my country to win 1st place in this category, but are you aware of this>

http://franklinscandal.com/franklindocumentary/index.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=asvl6kO1Vo8

Sometimes, I think the more power one has accumulated, the more power others have over you as you gradually sell your soul deeper and deeper. 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:06 | 4666790 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

I surrender; you win. Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch, (loyal Scotsman).

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:52 | 4665909 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

   Leftovers from a weekend party at Dimons vacation home...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:53 | 4665914 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

Methodists.

Methodists!!!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 13:59 | 4665947 22winmag
22winmag's picture

Self-medicating to cope with the big lie...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:00 | 4665955 Ifigenia
Ifigenia's picture

i would like to know if those drugs are bought by taxpayers money in the bailout robbery.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:13 | 4665976 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Don't sweat it baby. It's not like your money is yours or anything. Corporate welfare, EBT cards, unemployment, money you give to the treasury because the IRS is holding a fucking gun to your head, Social Security, Disability, Janet and Ben printing money, the fed buying treasuries and holding them on the books which the US taxpayer is responsible for, don't you get it? It's all one big slosh fund. Whats yours is theirs. No need to freak out.

Now if you struggle, or disagree, it's just gonna hurt more see...

So just lay back and enjoy it! Here have some more ketamine...

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:03 | 4665959 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

He should have bought drug stocks instead!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:13 | 4666001 Spungo
Spungo's picture

I call shens. There's no way a man that fat enjoys cocaine or meth. He would be at least 50 pounds lighter.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:16 | 4666311 kurt
kurt's picture

It was probably an MI-5 sting and he was buying for his girly-boy, "Come on Poppy, stop the limo here, that nice man has my medicine and we can go home and par-tay!" 

"I dare say my cricket bat says yes, here, light that with this 100 pound note, ha, ha, aaahh, yeahhha."

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 17:08 | 4666795 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Are you kidding ? The last tweeker I saw was about 150 lbs. lighter.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:14 | 4666005 Duude
Duude's picture

Brings to mind John Delorean one-time CEO, one-time drug middleman. John's company was in trouble. He needed that "gold" to bail him out.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:18 | 4666020 Glass Seagull
Glass Seagull's picture

 

 

How are all these dudes so fat while on the C-diet? 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:21 | 4666034 Pumpkin
Pumpkin's picture

And they arrest a banker for a victimless crime?  WTF?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 20:33 | 4667549 GoinFawr
GoinFawr's picture

He's an ex banker, which makes him 'little people'

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:25 | 4666053 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

I hope his 'professional help' doesn't take drugs!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:28 | 4666061 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

How are they going to retain good people without legalizing drugs on bank premises?

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:33 | 4666078 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

   He's going to need an extra large noose to fit around that fucking Goitre neck of his.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:36 | 4666084 Intoxicologist
Intoxicologist's picture

He looks a lot like Captain Kangaroo.

http://www.tvparty.com/bgifs18/capkangrecord1.jpg

 

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:44 | 4666148 Dick Gazinia
Dick Gazinia's picture

"Cocaine is a hell of a drug" - Rick James

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 14:58 | 4666217 hangemhigh77
hangemhigh77's picture

His big mistake is not "supporting" the current crook in office otherwise he would just be "Corzined" with a nice Swiss Chalet and all the Ludes he wants.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:15 | 4666306 Rising Sun
Rising Sun's picture

fat fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 15:50 | 4666456 CrabNuggetOne
CrabNuggetOne's picture

All you need to know:

The coop bank is (or was) an 'ethical' bank. Can't have that, or the UK's GIRO bank for that matter, too much competition for scum like Lloyds.

Wed, 04/16/2014 - 16:56 | 4666758 smacker
smacker's picture

Not exactly.

The Co-op bank holds the accounts of the Labour Party and the Lib Dem Party. Being ethical with that lot is virtually impossible.

There was also a hushed up scandal about a substantial donation the bank gave to running the office of one Mr Ed Balls, Labour's Shadow Chancellor.

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