"Blame The Weather" - For These CEOs, There Is Nothing Worse Than Snow In The Winter

Tyler Durden's picture

First it was the weather's fault when housing numbers cratered in late 2013 and early 2014. Then, when the cratering continued even after the snow had melted, first the NAR, and then economists, had to admit that it was more than merely the weather to blame for the end of the 4th consecutive dead cat bounce in US housing now that the latest and greatest boost to housing courtesy of the Fed, is finally fading. Soon after economists realized, two months after the infamous polar vortex, they will have to also trample Q1 GDP forecasts, and one after another, sellside firms cut Q1 GDP from over 3% to just above, if not under 1%.

Still, all of them without exception are hoping that the economy will rebound, because - you guessed it - it was nothing more than a few snowstorms that forced the world's largest economy to grind to a halt for three months.

And since stupidity rapidly goes mainstream, the same excuse used to "explain" away housing and economic deterioration was instantly (ab)used by a barrage of public company CEOs, whose earnings results were disappointing for only one reason (in their minds) - the weather. Because one always needs a narrative - any narrative - to explain away stories such as this: "Q1 Earnings Season Summary: More Than Half Have Missed Revenues"...

Yes, really: overnight even Goldman released, with a straight face, a report titled: "Revenue surprises are weak, in large part due to weather." Oh ok, we almost thought that companies which account for trillions in global sales In places like Asia, Europe, Africa and Australia), including areas that did not suffer the Polar Vortex such as the US northeast, would have a higher hurdle than "the weather" - apparently we were wrong. Just how wrong we were, we learn by listening to the following CEOs come out, one after another, explaining that it's not the global consumer who is tapped out, but it's the... snow in the winter.

Kimberly-Clark (KMB)

In terms of top-line growth in other parts of our business, we’re broadly on track except for K-C Professional in North America. There we got off to a slow start in the year, there are some impacts from the severe weather that we had in the U.S. in January and February and conditions in that business have improved more recently and we’re expecting better performance as we roll forward into the year.

Halliburton Company(HAL)

…I think that the weather and the knock-on impacts of the weather, the logistics impacts and stuff like that, were not anticipated to be as bad as they were… But again, looking at March exit rates, they were very strong, very solid, and that gives us high confidence for not only just Q2 but the rest of the year.

American Express (AXP)

Additionally, volume growth rates appeared to be influenced in part by the severe winter weather. I would add that while we are always cautious about drawing conclusion from intra-period trends, we were encouraged to see that U.S. billings growth increased over the second half of the quarter as the weather improved.

Stryker Corporation (SYK)

While we benefited from one extra selling day in the quarter, this was offset by the negative impact from the unusually severe weather which resulted in a high number of cancelled surgeries. As these surgeries are being rescheduled over the course of the year, we do not anticipate any discernible impact on our full-year growth rates. Illinois Tool Works (ITW)

Weather had a fairly limited impact on our North American revenues, although sequentially we did see a slightly stronger March and April’s off to a decent start.

Robert Half Intl (RHI)

From a cyclical perspective – so, first of all, as we look through the quarter, January and February were clearly revenue weather impacted. We would estimate that the weather reduced our growth rates on the temp side by about 1%. We then look at March. March was a very solid quarter. As we talked about, those growth rates  accelerated very nicely into the first two weeks of April.

* * *

And on, and on, one after another. It would be tragic if it weren't so funny.

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Berspankme's picture

Toilet paper wasn't selling because of weather @kimberlyclark? My business was open every single day this winter and had some pretty decent months. These guys are full of shit

RevRex's picture

Perhaps one of you lying GLOBAL WARMING assholes could explain HOW North America had it's coldest winter on record IF it is getiing warmer ALL OVER THE WORLD?

 Do you idiot Democrats not know the meaning of GLOBAL????

Do you braindead idiots even realize that Climate = THE WEATHER prevailing in an area?

 

 

Are you Democrats really so fucking stupid that you are just now figuring out that weather changes?

 

 

I am quite certain that some of you democrat pussies will down arrow my factual post, just as I am certain you will cower from answering the questions within it!

headhunt's picture

The facts do not work and now even the sheep no longer believe in 'global warming' which is why the new meme is 'climate change'

toys for tits's picture

With everyone blaming the weather for the shitty economy, it would seem the new group think would be to embrace and encourage global warming.

Oh regional Indian's picture

Such a sign that the machine mind is running things. 

A machine is happiest in one constant condition. Controlled obviously. 

Time for the butlerian jihad my friends.

Only machines can mow down this much humanity, daily, with impunity, don't you think?

Next, we will have "open" weather mods. Freaking truman show :-)

People will beg for it, probably.

Check out this interesting bit via Cathertes Aura, for those with esoteric leanings...

http://aadivaahan.wordpress.com/2014/04/26/the-return-of-in-formed-astro...

ori

 

SoilMyselfRotten's picture

Not a Democrat here but being obnoxious gets you my down vote

weburke's picture

Good one, more apt than known, the oceans speak volumes about our present situation, but they have been denied a voice, I would suppose this should all be looked at as funny, the lies, ------when the big boys have to lie about the oceans and weather, sun and moon, should we be surprised at the lies about human affairs?  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6giiYDlqRQs

MEAN BUSINESS's picture

Here's a little known fact headhunt: 25 years ago in a documentary called "After The Warming', host James Burke refers to the impacts of "climate change" in the first 90 seconds of the presentation. 

So you see it is not a "new" meme as you insist. I think most people would consider 25 years to be more aptly described as an old meme in terms of global warming.

Speaking of facts, I recommend watching the IPCC WG2 press release. The fact is that when a reporter asks the panel about "the pause", MIchel Jarraud, Secretary General of the World Meteorological Organization states:

"There is no pause"

I say this is a fact i.e. Jarraud said that. In a rather 'matter of fact' way I thought.

 

toady's picture

Love the arguing over semantics. Climate change = global warming = pollution = environmental destruction = whatever meme I missed.

Basically, we're all fucked on the environmental front, be it resource depletion, radioactive Japan, or the 'climate change' the red team loves to rage against.

I did up arrow you for your highly proficient use of profanity.

Flakmeister's picture

RevRex aka "Shit for Brains"

The eastern US represents 1% of the globe and relatively speaking it was one of the coldest places on the planet....

It was nowhere near the coldest winter on record, not even close....

The fact the California has a near record warm winter is completely lost on you..

Here is the global map for Dec-Feb:

http://data.giss.nasa.gov/tmp/gistemp/NMAPS/tmp_GHCN_GISS_ERSST_1200km_A...

jkostzh's picture

Well of course they are full of shit.  Everyone stops pooping when it snows. When that pent up demand lets loose, watch out!

francis_the_wonder_hamster's picture

Sadly, I had CNBC on at the office yesterday.  They proclaimed that 68% of companies had beaten estimates this earnings season.  They even had an infographic and did 15 minutes of commentary abour the "strong recovery".

They don't even bother to fact check anymore, I guess.

toady's picture

Yeah, but heat tape and furnace oil sales most be through the roof!

suteibu's picture

You would think they would be all for global warming and tell their paid-for politicians to shut the hell up about it.

Jumbotron's picture

I can just hear it now.

"Global Warming is causing these wild swings in weather.....even, paradoxically, the formation of long lasting Polar Vortices.  So.....in order to help earnings for our Too Big To Fail Corporations and Banks we need to pass legislation to reverse Global Warming in order to save our economy.....and the children."

suteibu's picture

Oh...right.  I forgot global warming causes colder winters.

Bizarro world.

orez65's picture

Global Warming causes Global Cooling!

Flakmeister's picture

Well, it can when one of the byproducts of the loss of Arctic sea ice is a high pressure ridge in north eastern pacific that forced the Jet stream to dip south....

http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/01/30/41889/drought-worsened-by-ridiculous...

And, funnily enough it was predicted some years ago..

http://thinkprogress.org/climate/2014/01/31/3223791/climate-change-calif...

http://www.wunderground.com/blog/JeffMasters/arctic-sea-ice-loss-tied-to...

Jumbotron's picture

Hey Flak....as a former meteorologist....I agree with you even though I made my snide comment above....in the voice of an ignorant politician.

And to the downvoter....and any future downvoters......the Artic sea ice is melting.  And it is melting due to climate change.  NOW.....that does not mean I believe that the bulk of climate change is from man made pollution.  Some of it....sure....it is a factor.  Just not THE factor.  The global climate is ALWAYS changing.  We used to have a climate that supported hairy elephants in the U.S. from Oregon to Florida (Mastodons and Wooly Mammoths).  Seen any of those lately ?

We just don't need idiot politicans taking advantage of a billion year old cycle and using it to enrich their friends and themselves at the expense of the people.  Combat pollution for pollution's sake. Sure....I'm all for that.  But don't conflate the two issues of pollution in the lower atmosphere and the near surface with a huge multi-faceted, multi-billion year cycle of climate change that has been around LONG before man.

As George Carlin said......."The Planet is fine....the PEOPLE are fucked ! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NL8HP1WzbDk

 

 

overmedicatedundersexed's picture

Hey, Flaky, call Dr woodcock and tell him he is wrong...."Professor Woodcock is Emeritus Professor of Chemical Thermodynamics at the University of Manchester and has authored over 70 academic papers for a wide range of scientific journals. He received his PhD from the University of London, and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Chemistry, a  recipient of a Max Planck Society Visiting Fellowship, and a founding editor the journal Molecular Simulation. (h/t Climate Depot)

Professor Woodcock told the Yorkshire Evening Post:

"The term 'climate change' is meaningless. The Earth's climate has been changing since time immemorial, that is since the Earth was formed 1,000 million years ago. The theory of 'man-made climate change' is an unsubstantiated hypothesis [about] our climate [which says it] has been adversely affected by the burning of fossil fuels in the last 100 years, causing the average temperature on the earth’s surface to increase very slightly but with disastrous environmental consequences.

"The theory is that the CO2 emitted by burning fossil fuel is the 'greenhouse gas' causes 'global warming' - in fact, water is a much more powerful greenhouse gas and there is 20 time more of it in our atmosphere (around one per cent of the atmosphere) whereas CO2 is only 0.04 per cent.

"There is no reproducible scientific evidence CO2 has significantly increased in the last 100 years."

He also said:

"Even the term 'global warming' does not mean anything unless you give it a time scale. The temperature of the earth has been going up and down for millions of years, if there are extremes, it's nothing to do with carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, it's not permanent and it's not caused by us. Global warming is nonsense."

Professor Woodcock dismissed evidence for global warming, such as the floods that deluged large parts of Britain this winter, as "anecdotal" and therefore meaningless in science.

 "Events can happen with frequencies on all time scales in the physics of a chaotic system such as the weather. Any point on lowland can flood up to a certain level on all time scales from one month to millions of years and it’s completely unpredictable beyond around five days."

Also, the only reason we regularly hear that we have had the most extreme weather "since records began" is that records only began about 100 years ago.

 "The reason records seem to be being frequently broken is simply because we only started keeping them about 100 years ago. There will always be some record broken somewhere when we have another natural fluctuation in weather.

"It's absolutely stupid to blame floods on climate change, as I read the Prime Minister did recently. I don't blame the politicians in this case, however, I blame his so-called scientific advisors."

When asked how can say this when most of the world's scientists, political leaders and people in general are committed to the theory of global warming, Prof Woodcock answered bluntly:

"This is not the way science works. If you tell me that you have a theory there is a teapot in orbit between the earth and the moon, it's not up to me to prove it does not exist, it's up to you to provide the reproducible scientific evidence for your theory.

"Such evidence for the man-made climate change theory has not been forthcoming."

This lack of evidence has not stopped a whole green industry building up, however. At the behest of that industry, governments have been passing ever more regulations that make life more difficult and expensive.

"...the damage to our economy the climate change lobby is now costing us is infinitely more destructive to the livelihoods of our grand-children. Indeed, we grand-parents are finding it increasingly expensive just to keep warm as a consequence of the idiotic decisions our politicians have taken in recent years about the green production of electricity."

Professor Woodcock is the latest scientist to come out against the theory of man-made global warming. James Lovelock, once described as a "green guru", earlier this month said that climate scientists "just guess", and that no one really knows what's happening.

Judith Curry, chair of the School of Earth and Atmospheric Sciences at the Georgia Institute of Technology, also said that she was "duped into supporting the IPCC" and added "If the IPCC is dogma, then count me in as a heretic."

 

Flakmeister's picture

As for this:

"There is no reproducible scientific evidence CO2 has significantly increased in the last 100 years."

Well, that is some pretty deep denial there buddy...

Oh, and all you had to say was emeritus to tell us that he had gone off the tracks so to speak... Old profs are known to say the damndest things and sometimes for money, just ask Fred Singer....

Edit: And your unattributed cut and paste from Breibart has generated discussion elsewhere:

http://andthentheresphysics.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/horse-shit.jpg

SmilinJoeFizzion's picture

The more you tax me, the cooler the planet gets.... Got it

RevRex's picture

Note how the same Democrat assholes who are blaming COLD WEATHER for poor economic numbers are the very same lying democrat assholes who blame Global WARMING for everything else!

Chief Kessler's picture

And Clive Bunghole says......negro please....? Hillary 2016! Thanks, you teatards are the bestest evaaaaaaa

nmewn's picture

Dear Idiot Progressive, context is everything.

"...and so what I've testified to you -- I was in the Watts riot, I seen the beginning fire and I seen that last fire. What I seen is civil disturbance. People are not happy, people are thinking they don't have their freedoms, they didn't have these things, and they didn't have them.

We've progressed quite a bit from that day until now, and we sure don't want to go back. We sure don't want the colored people to go back to that point. We sure don't want these Mexican people to go back to that point. And we can make a difference right now by taking care of some of these bureaucracies, and do it in a peaceful way."

"Let me tell, talk to you about the Mexicans, and these are just things I know about the negroes. I want to tell you one more thing I know about the negro. When I go, went, go to Las Vegas, North Las Vegas, and I would see these little government houses, and in front of that government house the door was usually open and the older people and the kids -- and there's always at least a half a dozen people sitting on the porch. They didn’t have nothing to do. They didn’t have nothing for their kids to do. They didn’t have nothing for their young girls to do.

And because they were basically on government subsidy -- so now what do they do? They abort their young children, they put their young men in jail, because they never, they never learned how to pick cotton. And I’ve often wondered are they were better off as slaves, picking cotton and having a family life and doing things? Or are they better off under government subsidy?

You know they didn’t get more freedom, they got less freedom -- they got less family life, and their happiness -- you could see it in their faces -- they wasn't happy sitting on that concrete sidewalk. Down there they was probably growing their turnips -- so that’s all government, that’s not freedom."

"Now, let me talk about the Spanish people. You know, I understand that they come over here against our Constitution and cross our borders. But they’re here and they’re people -- and I’ve worked side by side a lot of them.

Don’t tell me they don’t work, and don’t tell me they don’t pay taxes. And don’t tell me they don’t have better family structures than most of us white people. When you see those Mexican families, they’re together, they picnic together, they’re spending their time together, and I’ll tell you in my way of thinking they’re awful nice people. And we need to have those people join us and be with us not, not come to our party."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agXns-W60MI

Yes, clearly a razzzist.

Now, where does a man go to get his reputation back after the Times and Reid's selective editing, comments and your daggers in his back are removed?

////////////

Ms. Erable was kind enough to give us this only this morning. Kudos to her ;-)

Kayman's picture

nmewn

Thanks for the context.  The bought and paid for media are masters at "When did you stop beating your wife ?" Yellow journalism 101.

nmewn's picture

Yes, they certainly are...and then we have this:

"CNN's Dan Simon noticed Jason Bullock, a six-year Army veteran who serves as one of Bundy's bodyguards, hanging around at the Nevada ranch. Simon asked Bullock whether he found Bundy's remarks about blacks and slavery offensive.

"Mr. Bundy is not a racist," he told CNN. "Ever since I've been here, he's treated me with nothing but hospitality. He's pretty much treating me just like his own family."

"I would take a bullet for that man if need be. I look up to him just like I do my own grandfather," he added. "I believe in his cause and after having met Mr. Bundy a few times, I have a really good feel about him and I'm a pretty good judge of character."

In his own interview with CNN on Friday, Bundy refused to acknowledge that his remarks offended people.

"If I say 'negro' or 'black boy' or 'slave,' I'm not -- if those people cannot take those kind of words and not be offensive (sic) then Martin Luther King hasn't got his job done yet," the rancher said."

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/cliven-bundy-bodyguard-take-a-bullet?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+tpm-news+%28TPMNews%29

I'll leave it to the race baiting likes of Sharpton, Jackson etal to call him an Uncle Tom...or worse.

To his face, mano-a-mano would be suweeeet and even better! ;-)

Kayman's picture

Chief Kessler

I up-arrowed you. Best demonstration this am of what is wrong with the country. Faced with 2 choices- the extreme right and the extreme left.

 Corporate cronyism passed off as free markets and riders that don't belive in feeding the horses.

Nobody believes in doing the right thing; just- what's in it for me.

SmilinJoeFizzion's picture

So global warming increases revenues and PE ratios

headhunt's picture

I would be much taller, better looking and younger if it wasn't for the bad weather.

blindman's picture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQR2z4YCzDw
9/11 - Mike Ruppert - The Truth And Lies Of 911 -(Full length)
.
Guns and Butter
"We Remember Michael Ruppert and John Judge" with Michael Ruppert and John Judge.
http://www.kpfa.org/archive/id/102200
.
http://safeshare.tv/w/UAGOcLSuLX
The most honest three and a half minutes of television, EVER...?
.
the nation state framework is being used to
launch global corporate fascism. the powers of
the state, divorced from their underpinning
justifications(the people), are being trampled
to enable this techno cultural transformation.
what is/will be the status of the individual human
in the new world global corporate order?
..
apologies for saying it but....
" if you can face it,
god can fix it." c.a.f.

orangegeek's picture

Global corps affected financially by some bad weather across a few states.

 

Sounds like bullshit to me.  More like covering tracks over the pending deflationary market - pretty much what the gubermint is doing too.

Colonel Klink's picture

When missing earnings becomes serious......(fill in the blank)

Wait What's picture

Print MOAR!!

it's the proverbial 'so many nails!' the Fed with a hammer sees.

Caviar Emptor's picture

Snow Job 2014:
Dear shareholder,
Despite our booming economy and expert financial engineering we only managed to sell snowshoes this winter. But don't worry. With our junk bonds selling like hot cakes, channel stuffing, stock buy backs and .gov funding our secret customer surveillance program we are giving ourselves a raise in the C suite!

Sutton's picture

Just remember CEOs/Wall St shysters/Cramer/Private Equity rapists/when the weather is great you must give credit and take a smaller share of lucre. 

starman's picture

Maybe the Fed's can print some nice weather? 

nmewn's picture

Next they'll be saying all the flooding from the Great Thaw of 2014 manmade global warming winteryness is the reason that life jacket sales have plummeted into a vortex of reddish hues.

Because no one can get to the stores...of course ;-)

Seasmoke's picture

Kick the Snowball. 

New_Meat's picture

maybe we can kick "Snowflake" or make him melt?  hmmmm

soopy's picture

Yes, one needs a narrative when they're wrong. Like when one is consistently wrong about the market and Stolpers one's followers for years.

New_Meat's picture

Oh SHIT!!!!  These CEOs are gonna get scorched this summer!!!!

Salah's picture

It's not warming; the Earth is actually headed to another 'Little Ice Age'....why Putin wants all that Ukrainian farmland.  His scientists have been predicting this for years, and there's one thing Russians know---cold.

http://iceagenow.info/2014/04/face-cooling-200-250-years-russian-scienti...

SmilinJoeFizzion's picture

Shovel ready earnings

Comte d'herblay's picture

Could be though.  It killed what can't usually be killed 'round here, like the Ivy. And my all-weather 3 yr old pungent Rosemary plants.  Cracked the ceramic tile on my step treads, none of which has EVAH happened B 4. 

I'm inclined to believe the weather this year was more of a factor in slow sales just by the employment of the  "IBWA"  formula. 

I'm not willing to call them liars or confabulators on this one issue.  That's thin gruel however, re: any other thing they mouth.

Wait What's picture

ladies, gentlemen, it's all one big PsyOp. Instead of ranting like a lunatic against their BS narrative to anyone who will listen, why not teach everyone you know the principles of behavioral manipulation? give them the tools to see through the BS and people will begin to see the story for what it is: a hollow, crumbling, lie meant to alter the perceptions of everyone who listens and either doesn't know, or understand the textbook being used. the principles are really very simple; the fact they keep being used shows that, to some degree, they work on some part of the population.