IMF Warns Ukraine: Fight For The East Or No Money

Tyler Durden's picture


IMF approved the $17bn tranched loan to Ukraine last night, Gazprom gets paid; Ukraine gets its cash; and the door's wide open for the US and EU to pour more 'controlling influence' into the divided nation... Except there's one thing:


Which, roughly translated, appears to mean go to war with pro-Russian forces (and thus Russia itself if Putin sees his apparent countrymen in trouble) or you don't get your money!

Some other items of note include:

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Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:12 | 4716023 Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Who's your momma Ukraine? 

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:15 | 4716042 Vampyroteuthis ...
Vampyroteuthis infernalis's picture

The IMF wants to pay Gazprom?

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:20 | 4716072 Looney
Looney's picture

They (and us, the US) will be paying Gazprom for the Ukrainian gas for a veddy-veddy long time. Unfortunately...


Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:26 | 4716110 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

So now the IMF is outright saying - "We will pay for War!" - WTF!!!!

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:33 | 4716140 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

That's not really the issue.

The problem is the tax revenues from that rich farmland in the East.  If those regions go independent and join Russia, so does the tax revenue.

The western regions are all parasites hoping to get on EU benefits programs.  They don't pay taxes.

If the tax revs disappear, the IMF spreadsheets blow up.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:41 | 4716176 813kml
813kml's picture

The IMF spreadsheet blew up a long time ago, none of this is about money.  Ukraine is all about trying to bring Russia to heel.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:41 | 4716180 Arius
Arius's picture

17 billion redesigned comes down to 7-8-9 billion?

what is worth the life of few hunderds/thousands ukr ... those balckwater guys dont come cheap either ...


choices ... choices

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:43 | 4716194 Pinto Currency
Pinto Currency's picture



There's a gold market problem.

IMF needs a back story.

Get to work Mr. Yatsenyuk!

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:53 | 4716251 dryam
dryam's picture

Sounds like the way the US federal government operates with the states; play by our rules or you won't get federal dollars. We don't have real power over you & the law doesn't support our position, but it's your choice to get this money or not. It's called extortion.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:55 | 4716255 Manthong
Manthong's picture

This is astounding.

They have opened their kimono completely..

It is all about buying a country and unbridled violent coercion.

We should all be ashamed to have anything to do with this assault on freedom.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:13 | 4716366 KnightsofNee
KnightsofNee's picture

What freedom?

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:19 | 4716397 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

So manthong and others, really, can we do anything at all? 

Is the collective now totally helpless?

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:43 | 4716533 SoberOne
SoberOne's picture

Without sound money this bullshit will continue world wide.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:57 | 4716616 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture



This is like getting to choose between two slave owners.


Dear people of Ukraine, please choose the third option.  


P.S.  I'm not sure what the third option is, so you may have to get creative on that one.


Oh and...... good luck.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:06 | 4716662 svayambhu108
svayambhu108's picture

International Mother...

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:15 | 4716697 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

The 'NEW' FightClub.  You get paid after you lose.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:30 | 4716770 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Ori.. the pro-Russian “separatists” (gotta’ love that term, all they really want is to get back what they had before the west intruded) are doing it with all manner of arms including beautifully embellished truncheons.

We will do it by starving the beast.. I would rather not have to pick up a truncheon no matter how splendid.

It will take some time, but the people are pretty clever and stuff is developing.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 16:09 | 4717472 Latina Lover
Latina Lover's picture

All wars are bankster wars!

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:30 | 4716764 Vampyroteuthis ...
Vampyroteuthis infernalis's picture

The IMF can go to the Fed and say "Hey, print a few billion and launder it through POMO to us."

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 14:03 | 4716895 Malachi Constant
Malachi Constant's picture

Correction: Without letting the concept of PROFIT go this bullshit will continue worldwide.

Sound money, unsound schmoney - it's irrelevant.

Who are you to decide you "deserve" something? You already have what you need: body, water, air, food. Everything else your imagination - and you want everyone else to obey your imagination.

If you are driven by the promise of a reward, you are the problem. If you would do whatever you do even if you'd die of hunger, you are the solution.

If you create, you are the solution. If you prevent others from creating (by withholding information, too), you are the problem.

When you do what you want, you are happy. The world becomes better by 1 person.

When you lie to yourself in exchange for mansions and maybachs, you are neither living yourself nor letting others. You make the world hell for many people - including yourself.

Example: what on Earth makes Putin think it's "his" gas? It was there since forever; since when there was no one in the Universe to say "gas" or "Russia". It's Earth's gas. His fees are not for the gas, but for not letting anyone use it.

He's a bridge troll, like every government, like every merchant - especially in the intellectual property industry. "Instead of teaching you, I will fleece you. I would rather live among poor, uneducated, unhappy slaves than among equals, because surrounded by slaves I look like I am important."

And all for what? In a few years he'll be as dead and useless as the poorest sissiest leper 1,000 years ago.

What "profit"? What "I me mine" can there be?

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 14:24 | 4717000 Jadr
Jadr's picture

It's a great idea in theory but it doesn't work given human nature.  Perhaps you should read about the tragedy of commons.  If there is no ownership of anything then people are not motivated to put their effort into developing the land they live on.  Your idea has been tried numerous times and failed every time.  There are some great stories of early US colonist groups which took an approach like you suggest and they failed due to lack of food.  Many of the groups were wiped out while others developed property rights before it was too late and began to survive and then flourished.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 15:10 | 4717171 Bendromeda Strain
Bendromeda Strain's picture

Governor Bradford and Plimoth Plantation (the Mayflower)... start there.

Tue, 05/27/2014 - 00:49 | 4797499 Malachi Constant
Malachi Constant's picture

tragedy of commons

is a BS concept, invented to prevent you from looking in this direction. You approach the issue from an erroneous side: you think "How will I profit, if my neighbors don't care about profits?" Try thinking "What other ways of approaching a problem are there, other than profit?" For example, I like to see dirty dishes become clean under my hands, upset kids calm down, apples picked, etc. I don't feel the urge to be paid for doing any of these - why do you? I never set a price for my professional work - pay what you think is OK. Some people can afford $500, some $20. Who am I to "correct" them?

If there is no ownership of anything then people are not motivated to put their effort into developing the land they live on

What is it that you own that will stay yours after your death?

Your idea has been tried numerous times and failed every time

I am trying this idea every day. I am not rich measured in gold, that's true, but I am alive, healthy and have everything I need. When did YOU try this idea last time?

began to survive and then flourished

As in "they are still alive, pay no extortion fees, and follow nobody's orders"?

Nevermind my comment. I realize that you are normal and perfectly fit for this world, while I am the opposite.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:21 | 4716726 American Dreams
American Dreams's picture

Not helpLESS but help more Oh.  Still to much to lose for way to many.  There are just way to many ways to keep oneself alive without having to fight for it, so plenty of "help" available.

Know your enemy


Thu, 05/01/2014 - 14:17 | 4716968 Jadr
Jadr's picture

Freedom for the Ukrainians to demonstrate self-determination and determine which set of oligarchs they want to cozy up with.  I don't like the idea of Russia expanding its borders but I also don't like the idea of the coup government killing the other Ukrainians that want nothing to do with the new government.  Sections of Eastern Ukraine should be able to form their own autonomous government if they desire.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 14:53 | 4717120 Matt
Matt's picture

The People of Crimea chose to secede, then they chose to be annexed y Russia. IF the majority desire to be part of Russia rather than be independant, I guess it is their choice. Whether subsections can secede from the smalle State, and be independant, I suppose that would be right, but will likely not be allowed. 

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:56 | 4716609 Nigh Eve
Nigh Eve's picture

Perhaps Russia could simply purchase from Ukraine the 3 eastern-most oblasts for $25 to $30 billion.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:17 | 4716706 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

Rent is the answer.  They can rent them for $9 billion/yr.  99-yr lease.  Oh yeah, that's what Crimea was supposed to be about....nevermind.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 15:05 | 4717155 Matt
Matt's picture

And then charge $10 Billion / year for natural gas, sounds like a real win-win to me.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:45 | 4716203 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Agreed. Pretty blatant anouncement; surprised more people don't notice what they're saying.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 11:54 | 4716257 813kml
813kml's picture

The Banksters know exactly how worthless paper money is since they print it into existence.  The IMF is a global payday loan shack, it's all about entrapping the desperate into doing its bidding.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:20 | 4716401 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

The Economic Hitmen as well as the Jackels are very busy pillaging what's remaining of what was once a Soverign Country.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:33 | 4716475 Volkodav
Volkodav's picture

"What was once Sovereign Country"..

hardly..not thru history much..never, was never Ukraine ...nor last 23 years...sovereign in real 

and no country is Sovereign full of "Oligarch" control..thus also describes all western countries...

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:35 | 4716780 Terminus C
Terminus C's picture

Right, because the eastern countries don't have oligarchs...

Sovereignty is in the self.  Do you, as a person, have enough knowledge and power to be sovereign?

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 15:08 | 4717161 Matt
Matt's picture

Reading comprehension.

"and no country is Sovereign full of "Oligarch" control..thus also describes all western countries..."

No country that is full of oligarchs, including the west, is soveriegn. The poster in no way made any exclusion for any eastern country.

Fri, 05/02/2014 - 00:33 | 4718899 Volkodav
Volkodav's picture

Da...west is one in terrible denial though...

Russians accept more in real.....

Russia has more work to do..

laws are bad...23 years amazing work has been done, but old soviet laws linger..

I think has been good cautious paced work, rather than throw kid out with bath water...

hop before jump....

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:36 | 4716788 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

The irony is, once they have all the money it will be worth even less; perhaps even 'worthless.'

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:21 | 4716413 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

My feeling is that we are going to see a surprising amoutn of force on the IMF's side, increasingly.

It is the IRS of the World bank, in some twisted way.

The enforcer.....the poverty maker.....

A good name to associate: Stanley Fischer...


Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:24 | 4716429 813kml
813kml's picture

John Perkins wrote the book (literally) on Economic Hitmen.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:33 | 4716474 john39
john39's picture

i agree.  they are pushed into a corner.  do or die time for them, they won't turn back from their dream of total conquest...  not when they believe they are so close.   but alas, all illusion as they will soon discover.

Chapter 29

Those who wish to take the world and control it
I see that they cannot succeed
The world is a sacred instrument
One cannot control it
The one who controls it will fail
The one who grasps it will lose

Because all things:
Either lead or follow
Either blow hot or cold
Either have strength or weakness
Either have ownership or take by force

Therefore the sage:
Eliminates extremes
Eliminates excess
Eliminates arrogance

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:40 | 4716521 Mesquite
Mesquite's picture

Reminds me or a song long ago...

'..How low can you go...?..."

Limbo Rock, I believe...

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 14:59 | 4717118 CPL
CPL's picture

Let's congratulate the IMF first for the announcement in confirming what most people understood what the organization was all about.  Because in a single public announcement they've revealed their weakness, location, position and motivations; completely by accident. 

Which is fantastic.  Sooner they throw themselves off the board, the sooner we can get started.

What the IMF believes happened:

What actually just happened:

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:04 | 4716302 Save_America1st
Save_America1st's picture

@Tyler's or anybody else:


Any idears why IMF is issueing Ukraine SDR's (Special Drawing Rights) rather than fiat U.S. dollars???

Is there some underlying message there that dollars are not good enough maybe???

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:21 | 4716409 Edward1290
Edward1290's picture

get ready for some Serious inflation

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:03 | 4716643 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture



The dollar will be history.  SDR's will be a transitional NWO currency device.  


The US dollar has been used fully and will be discarded by the NWO as THE reserve currency after the reset.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:29 | 4716758 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Yep, the downside to the NWO re: the USD has always been that the American People 'unfairly' benefitted from reserve currency status (as opposed to the SDR, which will benefit ONLY the bankster elite)

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:35 | 4716786 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

nationstates are fictions, as are their fiat currencies.

plug's been pulled, drain circling in progess.

those who write the fiction-stories never wave the fiction-flags.

that's for the masses to imbibe.

act accordingly folks.

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:44 | 4716821 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

truth titillates the imagination far less than fiction.

- marquis de sade

Thu, 05/01/2014 - 13:38 | 4716796 Jano
Jano's picture

'cause thats their bookkeeping.

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