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The Latest Flight MH-370 Shocker: A Two-Ton Cargo Mystery

Tyler Durden's picture


At this point it is clear that Malaysian Airlines flight MH 370 which has been missing for two months will almost certainly never be found: whether due to the nature of the disappearance, or because it is a cover up stretching all the way to the very top (recall that it was disclosed by none other than NBC that the released air traffic control recording with the plane was edited, suggesting that the government itself is complicit in whatever happened), the plane will forever be entombed in the annals of history, alongside CNN's Nielsen ratings, and its final resting place will remain a mystery.

However, over the past 24 hours, another mystery surrounding the final voyage of flight MH-370 has emerged.

Recall that as part of our last article on MH370, we also provided a copy of the just released cargo manifest - something which should have been made public the day the airplane went missing and instead was withheld for two months. We repost the manifest below:


Note that on page 5 of the manifest, in a waybill from NNR Global Logistics in Penang to JHJ International Transporation in Beijing, are disclosed two shipments of some 200 units of Lithium Ion batteries, weighing a gross weight of 2453 kilos.

So far so good. However, as the Malaysia Chronicle reported last night, there is a major discrepnacy between the declared shipment weight on the manifest, and what Malaysa Airlines stated yesterday. From the Chronicle:

A new mystery has emerged in Flight MH370's disappearance with the Malaysia Airlines saying the lithium ion batteries carried in the plane weighed over 200 kg, even as the cargo manifest released recently listed the "consolidated" consignment at 2.453 tonnes.


"About two tonnes, equivalent to 2,453 kg of cargo was declared as consolidated under one master airway bill. This master AWB actually comprised five house AWB. Of these five AWB, two contained lithium ion batteries amounting to a total tonnage volume of 221 kg. The balance three house AWB, amounting to 2,232 kg, were declared as radio accessories and chargers," the Malaysia Airlines (MAS) said in a statement last night.


But this has not been disclosed before and is not stated in the cargo manifest, the Star reported.


According to Malaysian company NNR Global Logistics the batteries formed only a small part of a "consolidated" shipment weighing 2.453 tonnes.


Even though the MAS said the batteries weighed 221 kg, a company spokesman said they weighed less than 200kg. He, however, did not say what the remaining 2.253 tonnes of cargo was.

"I cannot reveal more because of the ongoing investigations. We have been told by our legal advisers not to talk about it," he was quoted as saying by the daily.

Would it be the same law firm that "advised" the Malaysian government to edit the voice recordings before public release?

He said he could not name the company which manufactured the batteries.


Malaysia Airlines CEO Ahmad Jauhari Yahya had also announced on March 24 that 200 kg of lithium batteries were on board the plane. He said they were packed safely.


Malaysian authorities released the plane's full cargo manifest along with the preliminary report on the missing Boeing 777-200 on Thursday which showed that NNR Global shipped 133 pieces of one item weighing 1.99 tonnes and 67 pieces of another item weighing 463kg for a total weight of 2.453 tonnes. Neither the number of batteries nor its weight were specified.


The manifest came with an instruction that it should be handled with care and that flammability hazards exist. Its flammability had been the source of many earlier theories over how the plane was lost. However, most of the theories have been debunked.

So because one mystery was not enough, here is the second one: what is the undisclosed 2 tonnes of cargo? And since absolutely everything about this disappearance stinks to high heaven, including a potentially non-benign cover up, one wonders: what else on the cargo manifest was left undisclosed? We are confident the more conspiratorially-minded, or anyone else for that matter, will have a field day with the opportunities this latest revelations presents.


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Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:19 | 4730319 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Geraldo Rivera will reveal the contents a week from now on PMSNBC.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:22 | 4730328 Grande Tetons
Grande Tetons's picture

If he is lucky it will be Al Capone's stash. 

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:28 | 4730349 cifo
cifo's picture

I didn't know China imports lithium batteries made in Malaysia.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:36 | 4730357 Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Yeah, lithium batteries inside drone command and control

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:40 | 4730370 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Naw, just two Tesla cars.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:07 | 4730453 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

It was two tons of fun.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:35 | 4730522 pods
pods's picture

Probably just equipment containing lithium batteries.  There is no way IATA would let 2000 kg of lithium or lithium ion batteries anywhere near a passenger aircraft.

Cargo was 2000 kg, and it contained lithium ion batteries.   You have a certain capacity of battery before you have to fill out a DG form, but you have to note that the shipment contains lithium batteries, and it has to be packed to reduce chance of a short circuit, etc.


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:58 | 4730586 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture



I like looking at Bills of Lading and similar, but I missed that (yes I did look at the Scribd document at the other article).  

Good comment, pods, and good reporting Tylers.

This whole think STINKS.  Something's up, something bad that they are not telling us.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:02 | 4730603 Four chan
Four chan's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:43 | 4730716 ndotken
ndotken's picture

"What the manifest does say is that NNR Global shipped 133 pieces of one item weighing 1.99 tonnes and 67 pieces of another item weighing 463kg for a total 'consolidated weight' of 2.453 tonnes."

2.453 tonnes = 5,407 lbs. A standard gold bar weighs 27 lbs. You do the math.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:48 | 4730728 fonestar
fonestar's picture

You can pack a shitload of Bitcoin into a Boeing 777.  Just sayin'....

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:59 | 4730760 InjectTheVenom
InjectTheVenom's picture

you are an idiot.   just sayin.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:03 | 4730768 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar achieved Satoshi conciousness in 2012.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:05 | 4730774 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Sort of a digital form of satori I suppose...

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 01:09 | 4730960 jaap
jaap's picture

Credits and Kudo's to Adam Curry of the No Agenda Show for stipulating this already the very next day after it happened.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 01:35 | 4730988 CIABS
CIABS's picture

...because of the ongoing investigation, that is to say, coverup...

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 02:58 | 4731046 Rubicon
Rubicon's picture

Sounds like the Chinese had nicked some hot new very secret US military weapon and smuggled it across land out of Europe before finally attempting to get it into China.

Just saying.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 03:54 | 4731085 svayambhu108
svayambhu108's picture

Where is the Diego Garcia guy?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 04:54 | 4731113 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

You called?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:37 | 4731159 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture






The worst misdirection story EVA!


Don't we have any smart people left in the CIA?


Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:53 | 4731170 svayambhu108
svayambhu108's picture

Motive/Means/Oportunity ?

Means/Oportunity they actually have since they can send a blanc photo actually from Diego Garcia, withou the EXIF edit :D, but what would be their motive,?

BTW: Nice story as in story not best story as in fact.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 07:35 | 4731237 negative rates
negative rates's picture

So ur tellin me that the plane was blown to small bits high in the sky, dispersing it's contents widely as the experts thought they were sneaking some new tech to a secret place. Not even I could have thought that one up.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 07:55 | 4731263 Confused
Confused's picture

That story of the IBM employee is crazy. Thanks for sharing, hadn't seem this before. Very interesting. 

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 08:21 | 4731300 smithcreek
smithcreek's picture

I know lots of people that fly electric rc planes that use Li-ion batterries and they buy them straight from China.  99% of the time the package containing the batteries is clearly labled as something different, NOT Li-ion batteries.  My guess is there was 2 tons of undeclared radio accessories and most of it was batteries, along with the 200 kg of batteries they declared.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 10:01 | 4731668 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

"Sort of a digital form of satori I suppose..."

All ones, no zeroes,no end, I suppose?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 04:05 | 4731092 svayambhu108
svayambhu108's picture

Satoshit Kakamoto uconciousness

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:02 | 4730767 StillSilence
StillSilence's picture

You can pack a shitload of Bitcoin into a Boeing 777.  Just sayin'...

Same goes for any other abstract concept.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:20 | 4730908 TheMerryPrankster
TheMerryPrankster's picture

You can stuff a shitload of virtual concepts inside another virtual concept and then wrap them in riddles, dip them in chocolate and pack in the cargo hold and still have room for a change of clothes, a two headed camel and a pair of lithuanian Jugglers.

Oh and they can have their pockets stuffed full of Bitcoins.

and if you include teleporting all bets are off.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 02:08 | 4731008 Theosebes Goodfellow
Theosebes Goodfellow's picture

Wait, wait, wait! This ain't nuthin' new! It was all done before with angels on the head of a pin. Move along now, nothing to see here...

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:09 | 4730848 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

FYI: For future consideration of product promotion and value preservation you might want to avoid direct associations between alternative, unproven, virtual crypto-currencies and a conventional, gigantic, physically proven, electronically engineered vehicle constructed to safely transport human lives that has, for all intents and purposes, inexplicably and without explanation or precedent, vaporized...leaving the probability of any present (and likely future) detection or location of said vehicle at zero.

 Just sayin’.....


Tue, 05/06/2014 - 09:58 | 4731653 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar is not the type of virtual man to consider the finer points of product promotion or physical human decency.  As Dostoyevsky might have said, "fonestar was a great rogue".

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:11 | 4731142 Praeda2
Praeda2's picture

Hundreds of people dead and your talking talk about shit coins. Of which, you don't have any you broke cunt.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 09:55 | 4731643 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar has shitloads of Bitcoins you dope.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 13:05 | 4732384 adonisdemilo
adonisdemilo's picture

@ fonestar,

Very appropriate that you should use the term " shitload, " a load of BTC  is certainly a load of shit.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 03:08 | 4731055 litemine
litemine's picture

A Standard Bar is 800 Troy Oz.

Quite a Bit more than 27 lbs. 

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 12:56 | 4732334 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

It's actually 400 Troy ounces.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:48 | 4730726 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

Your avatar's breasts or the cargo? The avatar has me confused.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:55 | 4730753 Four chan
Four chan's picture

never stare directly at the sun.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 12:11 | 4732152 Zymurguy
Zymurguy's picture

For chan's avatar FORTHEFUCKINGWIN!

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:35 | 4730838 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

I have it on good faith that the mystery package was a huge consignment of snakes chilled in a big refrigerator powered by Lithium ion batteries.  Unfortunately the batteries may not have been properly charged...


Tue, 05/06/2014 - 07:52 | 4731258 The worst trader
The worst trader's picture

Baby Snakes? Late at night is when they come out,I'll take all i can get. FZ

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:49 | 4731172 sunnydays
sunnydays's picture

A Philidephia type machine with the plane being an experiment of it being able to disappear without a trace and not be tracked.  In todays world where they can track a small pin and clothes have RFID chips.  A whole plane with people who have cell phones with GPS to disappear is ridiculous.  What it is about, we will never be allowed to know.  But there are some people who do absolutely know where it is and what happened. 

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:57 | 4731180 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Hmm, I wonder what the cargo manifests for the Lusitania said about the ammunition...

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:03 | 4730610 xtop23
xtop23's picture

Air America anyone?

The IATA will do as it's told, or people at the decision making levels will receive the Breitbart treatment, or find a syringe filled with Potassium buried in their jugulars soon thereafter.


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:21 | 4730641 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture
Flight landed in Cleveland, ABC, 9/11, 11:50

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:12 | 4730634 Jay
Jay's picture

The emergency 1-800 number on the manifest belongs to Aquatex Manufacturing in Albany, NY. Maybe they could shed some light on what was shipped. Section II of PI 965, that the batteries are in complicance with, has these conditions:

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:41 | 4730711 pods
pods's picture

Section II of 965 pertains to smaller quantities (of watt hours) and has lower limits (2.5 kg net per package for the lowest power) and if we are talking about 2000 kg of material shipped, that is a lot of boxes.

Probably equipment with batteries shipped with it, but tough to tell without an actual DG form (not required) or a descriptive waybill, which was probably done electronically, 

Still, you aren't going to load pallets of material with a Lithium ion label on it without making sure the paperwork is tight.

Probably high end electronics that are battery operated.  Could be anything really. But to ship 2000 kg of material via air is very expensive.  Had to be some really expensive shit to ship it like that!

And that stuff will still not cause the jet to turn off the transponder, etc.

Aquatex makes cleaners, so that number is odd and it is a small ass place.



Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:29 | 4730922 Handful of Dust
Handful of Dust's picture

Pods, is this the same 2 tons of equipment those [ex] Seals were guarding?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 04:50 | 4731109 Nassim
Nassim's picture

Not that expensive. I airfreight autoparts from Germany to Australia regularly - and it makes good economic sense.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 05:25 | 4731127 Divine
Divine's picture

my e-cig company ships lithium batteries via air mail all the time and many times, our chinese suppliers cut some corners with the declarations. They have all multiple companies in Hong Kong whose name will be in the AWB

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 08:35 | 4731339 pods
pods's picture

Wish I could do that. Here in the states you have to have your shit tight if you are shipping Li.  Of course, the rules were implemented, then postponed, changed, etc.



Tue, 05/06/2014 - 07:58 | 4731268 Dugald
Dugald's picture plain covers.......

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 09:35 | 4731557 JailBank
JailBank's picture

"A vibrator, never your vibrator"

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:02 | 4730764 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

Would this company be shipping something with lithium batteries?

More Details for Aquatex Manufacturing CO

Categorized under Tank Cleaning Equipment-Manufacturers and Supplies Manufacturers. Our records show it was established in 1995 and incorporated in New York. Current estimates show this company has an annual revenue of $10 to 20 million and employs a staff of approximately 10 to 19.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:50 | 4730738 Kahn E. Lingus
Kahn E. Lingus's picture

I recently placed order on 3/6/14 for electronics and a LIPO battery from major distributor in Asia. It was shipped thru Kuala Lampur, Malaysia to Los Angeles. I would not be surprised to find that large quantities of LIPO's are shipped via air. Regardless, just one LIPO is nasty enough to wreck havoc on any plane if it ignites. They are worse than road flares.Think white phosphorus incendiary rounds in 'Nam.

The bill of lading shows:

450mah 1S1P 20C Lipoly Battery 1   US$2.66   IN STOCK     Shipment International (Registered) Air Mail 0 - 100g Lipo US$3.99
Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:07 | 4730778 pods
pods's picture

I'd say for smaller quantities or high end electronics it makes sense, like medical devices, etc.

Bulk battery shipment would be crazy expensive.  They could, who knows.  That BOL looks like $4 to ship a $2.66 battery?  Maybe shipping volumes on aircraft is down and they get a bulk discount? 

Or maybe they do things differently on that side of the world.  Idk. If they lit up, there would be emergency calls and a gigantic fireball burning bright white!


Tue, 05/06/2014 - 02:21 | 4731015 El Crusty
El Crusty's picture

It is some kind of equipment, but i doubt it is anything as benign as cellphones or laptops.
Its not gold- 2 tons of gold is roughly 80 million- one of those jets is worth around 250 million on its own. doesnt make sense to make a 250 million dollar jet disappear and be removed from service to hide an 80 million dollar transaction.
My guess is that its some kind of very high end technology that China is unable to engineer on their own and were able to divert from its original destination to Malaysia.
im thinking either machinery to produce wafers for ICs like stated below or some kind of military tech- stealth, nuclear or other. The US or some corporate head said " oh no we cant have that at all!" and the plane was brought down with autopilot or missile.
there are lots of things you can pack into the same space that 2 tons of gold would fit into that are worth way more than 80 million in gold or a 250 million dollar jet.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:16 | 4730652 ZeroPoint
ZeroPoint's picture

Janet Napolitano is fun??

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:36 | 4730702 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Fuck that "nappy bitch!"

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:47 | 4730724 Janice
Janice's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:17 | 4730653 ZeroPoint
ZeroPoint's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:16 | 4730467 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Radio accessories.... Sounds kinda like drone control joysticks or paddles or whatever you guys call them. I'd call 'em joysticks. So 2 tonnes of Taliban confiscated radio accessories from Afghanistan (with added Atari joysticks). Note, Atari joysticks may give you a small bubble of skin on your left palm (repetitive stress injury), but not actually an issue in the 1970s. Just put a band-aid on it.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:27 | 4730503 RmcAZ
RmcAZ's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:49 | 4730567 Blano
Blano's picture

So that's the term for masturbating these days?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:38 | 4730706 Janice
Janice's picture


Maybe EMPower EMPloyee to EMPty EMPire???

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:32 | 4730358 linniepar
linniepar's picture

I didn't know Au was flammable.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:45 | 4730371 Patriot Eke
Patriot Eke's picture

Technically everything burns.  Why go to that much trouble for such a small amount of gold?  I'm putting my money on nuclear cargo instead.


"A thermonuclear weapon weighing little more than 2,400 pounds (1,100 kg) can produce an explosive force comparable to the detonation of more than 1.2 million tons (1.1 million tonnes) of TNT.[2] Thus, even a small nuclear device no larger than traditional bombs can devastate an entire city by blast, fire, and radiation. Nuclear weapons are considered weapons of mass destruction, and their use and control have been a major focus of international relations policy since their debut."

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:21 | 4730487 max2205
max2205's picture

Red rum

Red mercury?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:47 | 4730561 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

Lumped around half of a pratice, 2 part nuke demo charge for a week. Supposedly the real thing, all we needed, minumum, was a kilometer and a land contour to "survive".

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:10 | 4730596 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Two tonnes of gold would be worth over $80,000,000...



EDIT: If that were to be gold (going to China), that would open up a new can of worms...

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:51 | 4730741 ImGumbydmmt
ImGumbydmmt's picture

yep. nuke

we need a real doozy of a false flag to get the american sheeple behind another war, to keep the wheels on the bus for the military idustrial complex.

And the O admin needs a big distraction before impeachment  begins for benghazi.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 02:13 | 4730998 Wile-E-Coyote
Wile-E-Coyote's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:54 | 4730750 thelibcentury
thelibcentury's picture

I had a similar thought and find the Maersk episode coincidentally troubling...a cursory review of the reputation of the security firm involved gives off some bitter smoke

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:05 | 4730773 InjectTheVenom
InjectTheVenom's picture

ditto on the Maersk.   supposedly the 'toxicology' results came back recently, and no heroine was found in the seals' bloodstreams....

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:05 | 4730885 a common man
a common man's picture

Something bothering me about the Maersk episode. Two ex seals dying of a heroin overdose.

Think about it.    How many times have you heard of someone dying from a heroin overdose? More than you can count. How many times have you ever heard of two people dying together from a heroin overdose together at the same time together. Uhh....never once that I can recall.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 11:38 | 4732033 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

I don't buy the heroin OD for two seals either BUT depending on what you 'cut' it with, one could murder the end user no matter how little is ingested.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:08 | 4730780 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

As if some government would risk a nuke cargo being discovered, or in this case lost, rather than using any number of available unmarked military aircraft or cargo airline fronts.   Not how they operate.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:13 | 4730791 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

I agree.  Shipping a nuke by commercial passenger airline?  Ah, no!  And who would be shipping nukes on Malaysian...?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:21 | 4730814 thelibcentury
thelibcentury's picture

If it was a nuke, it stands to reason that the whole thing was planned in advance. So the smallest crime would be the loading of outrageous cargo on said civilian transport and the fraudulent manifest.

Think like a giant, dochen....

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:20 | 4730909 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture



"Think like a giant, dochen...."

Waah!  Not fair!  :)

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:16 | 4730801 thelibcentury
thelibcentury's picture

Might not have been an official gov't, per se...

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 09:14 | 4731476 Patriot Eke
Patriot Eke's picture

Oligarchs control governments like puppets.  Who really controls nuclear weapons then?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:44 | 4730382 james.connolly
james.connolly's picture

All along Malay manifest talked about battery's and mangosteens, and all along they have refused to name who manufactured the battery's, who owned them, or who shipped them, the only thing released is "WHO they were being shipped to in CHINA".

Do the BATTERY's exist? FUCK NO

Once the name the battery that company would be subject to lawsuit, based on fire-negligence theory, howvever that company would fight like hell to protect their name, especially given that there never were any battery's aboard.

Why all the fucking Lie's?

Most likely SERCO-GROUP who run's ATC worldwide is/was involved with the ATC in Malay, and they bought off everybody with this GOLD.

Serco-Group controls all, logistics, ATC, satellite, ground, air, and space.

Best of all SERCO-GROUP controls OBAMA-CARE.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:38 | 4730533 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

This is insane, truly insane.   By finding out who made and shipped them would allow a better investigation but they won't do it because of what you said and also what coverups may be coattailed with these shipments.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:33 | 4730356 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Clearly, it was two tons of Pelosi, Hillary and  Senator Feinstein's shit they have crapped out in the last 4 years, with a special Beiber liquid that nobody wants to talk about. They say it's worse than 300 hydrogen atomic bombs if it goes off in a public area.


God help us.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:01 | 4730604 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Mmm, yeah, middle of the Indian Ocean makes sense then.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:46 | 4730722 TheAnswerIs42
TheAnswerIs42's picture

Look for the large milky spot.


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:49 | 4730406 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

"the plane will be entombed in the anals of history"

....thanks...think I'll pass........

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:59 | 4730428 cifo
cifo's picture

How about "an analyst working in the back end, behind the rectory".

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:12 | 4730459 knukles
knukles's picture

Shit sounds all ass backwards to me.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:34 | 4730520 OpenThePodBayDoorHAL
OpenThePodBayDoorHAL's picture

Rock Hudson took his kids out of Catholic school because he didn't like how they were being reared.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:55 | 4730585 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Did Rock then rear the kids at home?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 06:27 | 4731150 zjxn06
zjxn06's picture

Calling Dr. Dover,  Dr. Ben Dover

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:18 | 4730657 SnobGobbler
SnobGobbler's picture

didnt you hear, that flight came in last wednesday

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:39 | 4730844 chapaev's ghost
chapaev's ghost's picture

Where else would you put it?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:04 | 4730444 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

It's a self powered mobile video game console??

Looks like it's computers, monitors, a veritable shitload of batteries, the kind that power high def video graphics.


Holy shit.  Surely it cannot be..

I will bet everything somebody else has it's some kind of military shit, and it doesn't fire missiles...

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:06 | 4730450 SnobGobbler
SnobGobbler's picture

...peak lithium...

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:06 | 4730448 booboo
booboo's picture

Let me take a crack at it.

First of all the good captain was obsessed with Amelia Earhart (this is specualtion on my part but valid unless proven otherwise), we all know Malaysians love the redheads, throw in the lost and never found aspect and female pilot and BOING, major boner time in front of the computer looking at old photo's and spanking the one eyed pit viper. (like I said, he was obsessed) Wife moved out prior to the event (probably tired of walking in on him screaming out in passion "look what you make me do" I think we can get the wife to speak directly to this.

Now we know that the co pilot had a red wig on him when he boarded the plane, this can be verified by one of the passangers if and when we locate them. The plane took the direct route that Amelia Earhart took on that fateful day, she wandered back and forth looking for a landing spot to refuel and the captain was replicating this. The last transmission we have from that night was "Good night Amelia" now they have cut the "Amelia" out as we know the recording has been doctored, this again will be verified when the original is finally released if ever. From this we can obviously deduce that the pilot and the co-pilot were locked up like to dogs, the sky waitress's frantically trying to throw cold water on them but since the cockpit door was locked one of the CIA agents on board climbed out onto the outside of the plane via the "CIA EXIT ONLY" door, shimmied over to the cockpit window, shot it out in a effort to gain access and unlock the door, a stray bullet hit the captain in the back of the head and proceeded into the co-pilot blowing the red wig off sucking it out of the window and sucking it into the #3 engine and sending the plane crashing into the Black Hole of Calcutta and into space. It was seen by the cosmonauts on the ISS and this is the pretext for the war in the Ukraine trying to silence Russia from exposing the truth about this incident and this is why they also invaded the Bundy Ranch the week following because there was a TED Bundy which rhymes with RED and well the rest is as they say HISTORY. Book it bitches cause that's what happened.


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:33 | 4730515 Sockeye
Sockeye's picture

I hope CNN is reading!

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:42 | 4730544 Calmyourself
Calmyourself's picture

I don't care who you are that's funny..

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:52 | 4730575 Blano
Blano's picture

That is so wacked out, it might actually work.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:53 | 4730576 DanDaley
DanDaley's picture

Funny, I thought the same thing.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:01 | 4730601 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Best HedgeLaugh ever.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:08 | 4730618 rainingFrogs
Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:32 | 4730690 Bernankenstein
Bernankenstein's picture

Totally believable until the part about the #3 engine. Only 2 engines on this jet. Darn, and I was so hoping it might be true.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:49 | 4730736 booboo
booboo's picture

Wrong, the RAM was deployed aka # 3 engine, it was needed to power up the antenna spooled out 1.5 miles behind the plane trying to contact the Ohio class sub with Nazi hunter Hyman Weisenthal on a heading of 239 enroute to Argentina to pick up Angela (Hiler) Merkel for a blood test and forced abortion of the anti Christ.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:34 | 4730835 Bernankenstein
Bernankenstein's picture

Oh, well, apologies for questioning your thorough research. I'm sold...

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 02:17 | 4731012 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture



Calcutta, then Space??!!...DAMN!


What were we talking about again?


Good One.



Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:24 | 4730494 Spitzer
Spitzer's picture


Geraldo left FOX ?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:43 | 4730549 Payne
Payne's picture

Start the conversation with who has the power and authority to load 2 tons of undisclosed cargo onto an aircraft in Malaysia ? (CIA) and what would they be shipping to China ?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:09 | 4730628 LasVegasDave
LasVegasDave's picture

Shit for brains Malaysians? check

Muslim connection? check

ZH conspiracy morons to blame the Heebs?  Wait for it....

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 23:13 | 4730792 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

Two tons of golden torahs

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 08:16 | 4731292 BigJim
BigJim's picture

 Shit for brains Malaysians? check

Muslim connection? check

ZH conspiracy morons to blame the Heebs?  Wait for it....

Well, you've got to admit - 'Mangosteen' is a Jewish name.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:06 | 4730889 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:53 | 4730944 Bokkenrijder
Bokkenrijder's picture

It's all quite simialr to the Israeli El Al 747 that crashed in Amsterdam in 1992;

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 01:22 | 4730976 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

Lies, more lies and damn lies.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 07:28 | 4731229 jerry_theking_lawler
jerry_theking_lawler's picture

So, are you saying its in its original location off the coast of Vietnam or did it make it somewhere else to the North or West of its intended location.....(ie. Kazakistan or Diego Garcia)?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:20 | 4730320 DirkDiggler11
DirkDiggler11's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:26 | 4730338 blindman
blindman's picture

golden batteries?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:41 | 4730376 Antifaschistische
Antifaschistische's picture

27.5 pounds

Size of a standard gold bar: 7 inches x 3 and 5/8 inches x 1 and 3/4 inches. Weight of a standard gold bar: approximately 400 ounces or27.5 pounds.


1.99T = 4387lb 3.1900oz



4387 / 133 = 32.98 lbs each (average including packaging material)

yah, you could make that fit.


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:45 | 4730550 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Nice try, no cigar.  China no longer imports 400 oz bricks.  They even thumb their noses at the Imperial wight system and stick to Metric/SI.  400 oz bricks all go to CH, where they are assayed and melted into 1 kg bars.  Then shipped to China on Swiss Air or China Air.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 08:24 | 4731308 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

Good delivery bars can be up to 430oz in weight, so definately possible.

Doré bars can be anything up to 25kg. Bearing in mind the US sent old bars to Germany,
these could be any old shit that has been knocking about. 

Conspiracy theory, generally becomes conspiracy fact ;)

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:38 | 4730367 taraxias
taraxias's picture



Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:54 | 4730408 navy62802
navy62802's picture

Strangely, the timing and location of this plume correlates to the sighting of an unidentified aircraft. The aircraft that were spotted in a triangular formation over Amarillo, TX in early March were triangular in shape and suspected to be a new secret American aircraft. Perhaps the unidentified planes and the mystery plume are related to each other.

One remote possibility is that a foreign nation penetrated US airspace covertly and dropped a bomb on one of our test ranges. It certainly isn't hard to see why the government would keep that information secret, if that is what happened.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:12 | 4730458 jaxville
jaxville's picture

In some way there may be a link to this and the aircraft cargo. The US has been develping thermo baric (fuel vapor) weapons that have a staggering yiels approaching that of nuclear weapons. The latest generation which have about the same yield of a daisy cutter but about 1/4 the size are no doubt highly classified.


 Could it be possible Red Chinese agents somehow obtained a sample and were in the process of shipping it? That would warrant the diversion of the aircraft to Diego Garcia. A crash story could leave the agents wondering whether or not the US penetrated their network.


 Just speculation on my part. After all, what would I know about something like that?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:15 | 4730645 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

I've said for a while now that the 'truth' about this flight isn't going to come through the MSM or gov't agencies.

Someone will release a rumor, because, hell, thats all anyone can do right now.  Can't come out and say "I saw the plane land at Diego Garcia" now can we.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:19 | 4730659 raeb
raeb's picture

Probably just some flatulence from the Bundy cattle herd.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:50 | 4730570 Carl Popper
Carl Popper's picture

I have seen the videos of those triangular craft.   They are huge and slow.   Those are the semidirigible heavy lift vehicles filled with helium.   The largest ones can llift 200 to 500 tons.   Google them

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:03 | 4730609 navy62802
navy62802's picture

Check out the aircraft in those pictures. A triangular formation of these aircraft was photographed over Amarillo, TX on 10 March 2014. This "weather phenomenon" was spotted on radar a week later about 100-ish miles west of Amarillo.

I'm guessing that it's either a secret US aircraft or (more unlikely) a foreign aircraft that penetrated US airspace. Either way, it is interesting that this "weather phenomenon" occurred within a week of the aircraft sightings and generally in the same OPAREA.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 13:13 | 4732408 Matt
Matt's picture

How can they tell they are too big to be X-47B, when they don't know the distance and have no other object of known size for perspective?

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 13:26 | 4732468 omniversling
omniversling's picture

Search 'TR3-B'

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:08 | 4730624 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Just the other day I read that there is a serious helium shortage afoot.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:22 | 4730330 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

my guess is it is 2 tons of 30 year UST paper which the banks have been calling in for delivery and no one seems to have. Or maybe 2 tons of prized argentenian bonds.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:41 | 4730375 neidermeyer
neidermeyer's picture

A pallet of BIS pirate chests and a case of Chivas?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:52 | 4730417 agstacks
agstacks's picture

I love the disgruntled pessimism of fonz these days..I can relate +1

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:56 | 4730423 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

It couldn't be UST, because of the shortage - its only paper bonds that are available to be bought and sold, not physical, which is a little known secret that's going to cause the physical bond price to explode someday when it becomes widely known.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:22 | 4730331 beavertails
beavertails's picture


Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:23 | 4730333 bugs_
bugs_'s picture

"GeoResonance has exclusive access to demilitarised technology now owned by the  Sevastopol National University of Nuclear Energy and Industry in Ukraine, Mr Kursa said."

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:24 | 4730335 ss123
ss123's picture

New iPads!

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:27 | 4730340 q99x2
q99x2's picture

It was the drone controlling unit from Pakistan. Thought everyone knew that.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 01:49 | 4730995 El Crusty
El Crusty's picture

i dont think obama weighs 2 tons though...

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:27 | 4730341 novictim
novictim's picture

Is it too early to say "There are no survivors."

Has anyone interviewed Mr. Lock?

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:27 | 4730344 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

How much would 2,232 kg of Gold be worth?

Let's see, 71,760 troy ounces X $,1300/ounce = $93,288,000 ($93 Million).

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 20:45 | 4730390 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

+ 4.5 tonnes of "Fresh Mangosteens" that didn't happen to be in season.

I am starting to think the southern IMMERSAT track was a hoax.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 21:46 | 4730560 Calmyourself
Calmyourself's picture

I'll give it a try..  Two tonnes of Moochelles twinkies on the way to Beijing to meet up with mooch and the mother in law..  Reggie love shot down the plane to drive a wedge between Moochele and the Bamster..  It's all I got.

Mon, 05/05/2014 - 22:52 | 4730745 Maxter
Maxter's picture

I think that the whole IMMERSAT track is a hoax.

I still think it landed at that US airbase.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 00:00 | 4730875 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

You're the closest so far.  What was on board was IC wafer machines, used to make China's own version of "Intel inside".  China can no longer risk using American (AMD or Intel) processors, given that they offer a stealth back door to the NSA.

Plus the 5 Chinese EEs who were leading its development, was the "priceless cargo".  They and the cargo was simply too much for the US to let... "fly".  They were forced to Diego Garcia.  The 5 EEs are undergoing Enhanced Interrogation, while everyone else is "collateral damage", i.e. Soylent Green for fish after key organs were harvested and sold on the market. 

The Development and Mass Production setback to China is absolutely humongous.  You don't replace the brains and experience of "The best of the best" just like that.  Explains why the lid is so tight on the Malay gov itself, with the US applying all the pressure, bribes and blackmail.

Tue, 05/06/2014 - 08:25 | 4731310 sleigher
sleigher's picture

This sounds more plausible to me than any of the other theories out there.  We know China wants out of US hardware and have their own linux distro they have been using and developing for years.  

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