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Obama's 5 Pimpest Rides

Tyler Durden's picture




 

By now everyone knows that the US president has just commissioned a brand new $1.2 billion helicopter, also known in some circles as ObamaCopter 1. Ironically, by the time the chopper is completed and operational some time after 2020, Obama will no longer be president (unless the US constitution is changed enough to allow the current president to serve indefinitely), and as such the most likely US president to take advantage of the pimped out Sikorsky is Hillary Clinton. However, that is not to say that the current president does not have pimped out rides. The following BBG clip presents the "top 5 most extreme rides of the president", courtesy of the US taxpayer of course.

 

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Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:41 | 4747373 Aussiekiwi
Aussiekiwi's picture

Its good to have toys, and he has some cool ones.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:55 | 4747401 BlackChicken
BlackChicken's picture

Is Reggie number six?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:19 | 4747524 chemystical
chemystical's picture

"Is Reggie number six?"

Considering that he's an Oval Orifice, I'd say Reggie is more closely associated with number 2

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:00 | 4747576 James_Cole
James_Cole's picture

stupid article about Obama + article about rock paper scissors + another stupid article about obama = drunk weekend tyler?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 06:23 | 4747706 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

He's a pimp alright!  He's pimped this country into prostitution for the banksters and da gumbmint.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:00 | 4747767 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

President Camacho. It's happening in our lifetime. No 500 year hyper sleep accident required to see it for yourselves. Take your average congress critter, please.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:29 | 4747799 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

We have met President Camacho.  Barry is no President Camacho.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:36 | 4747483 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:00 | 4747722 Truthseeker2
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:24 | 4747747 DavidC
DavidC's picture

"We came, we saw, he died".

Disgusting woman.

DavidC

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:05 | 4747773 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Even if they play that clip a million times before the elections, if she is meant to be the next one in, she will.

The system is broken beyond repair...

ori

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 11:05 | 4748006 philipat
philipat's picture

Hilary Clinton, Barbara Boxer, Nancy Pelosi, Diane Feinshwein, Patty Murray, Maxine Waters etc. Where does the Dem party keep finding such dreadful "Women" (Allegedly).

The "C" word truly applies to all....

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 11:44 | 4748111 rubiconsolutions
rubiconsolutions's picture

"The "C" word truly applies to all...."

Are you saying these women are all "C"ougars?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 12:43 | 4748211 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

Where did the Republican Party find Condolezza Rice?

Both parties fish in the same shitholes.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 18:57 | 4748626 Christophe2
Christophe2's picture

I think instead that whenever they pick a completely unlikable candidate for team red, it's advance warning that team blue is going to win.

Just look at Romney vs. Obama.  Who on earth was going to vote for a corporate raider who puts his dog on the roof of his car when driving across the country?  Obviously, Obama was meant to win and to be deemed far more preferable than Romney (the lesser evil).  (Same for warlike McCain vs. fake-peace Obama)

Hilary, with her baggage from Bengazi, her now totally decrepit looks, and her vile quips about (raping and) murdering foreign leaders using her al Qaeda henchmen, is set to make Jeb Bush's election seem almost logical and believable, in that at least we haven't seen him do quite so much evil, first hand (yet).

(Thinking of all this though, I am soooo happy knowing that I finally renounced my US citizenship and no longer have the 'right' to cast my ballot for that!  LOL)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:06 | 4747833 Laughinggrizzley
Laughinggrizzley's picture

Never underestimate the stupidity of a banana republics populace. Marion Barry was reelected twice, whom the Washington Post endorsed, knowing of his drug addiction.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:14 | 4747740 negative rates
negative rates's picture

I told you you had a problem putting out fires.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:56 | 4747763 Lumberjack
Lumberjack's picture

 

Air Force general: We invented an Invisible Shield for Air Force One Barry: No Way-Really? Air Force general: That's right sir.

http://www.freakingnews.com/Airforce-Greets-Invisible-Plane-Pictures-794...

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:47 | 4747810 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

Is that anything like when the B-2 does an overflight of a domed football stadium at night? - Ned

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 12:34 | 4748191 DESMO_RR
DESMO_RR's picture

Years ago in the car business we always equated larger wheels with lower IQs. So this looks about right!

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:45 | 4747495 booboo
booboo's picture

I suspect just like the King of France was intercepted trying to escape dressed as a commoner our fearmongering faux leaders will be cauget doing the same, in that case Mctaint, Maobama, Lindsay "the buttplug" Grahm, Harry "broken" Reid, Nancy "Halloween" Pelosi will be caught scooting out of town dressed as common clowns.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 03:43 | 4747643 Cast Iron Skillet
Cast Iron Skillet's picture

it's just sort of the shits that the taypayers are paying for them.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:33 | 4747876 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

Yassir, gotta maintsin the corrupt arrogant nsrcissistic illegal indonedian kenyan sociopath liar in chief's grand imperial gplf lifestyle @ tax paying US citizen serf and peasant expense.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:41 | 4747374 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Head for the hills. The Butcher of Benghazi is getting a new chopper.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:43 | 4747377 logicalman
logicalman's picture

Kings of old couldn't even dream of such things

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:00 | 4747509 old naughty
old naughty's picture

just when one thought all his are pimpest...BanBG came up with five extreme ones.

And self-less of him leaving Hitlery with the heli for rain-down someting.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:43 | 4747896 duo
duo's picture

naaah, Obama is one pleasure barge away from the US's version of Caligula.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:44 | 4747378 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Maybe he can use one of those to go tour Afghanistan? Or eastern Ukraine?

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:58 | 4747408 Mr. Magoo
Mr. Magoo's picture

I think Somalia would be the best choice.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:05 | 4747581 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

not enought gold courses.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:11 | 4747439 Matt
Matt's picture

A victory parade in a convertible through Tikrit?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:28 | 4747532 rocker
rocker's picture

ZH could do better. Everbody knows the President Ride is most determined by "Not the President".  Please don't become MSM.

 Ala: The helicopter is for the future. As Bambi is mostly history. Term almost done. Most high priced armed vehicles were the

result of past orders to do so. They are not built in a day. Yes, they are overpriced, as is, most of our Military Complex.

Overpriced show pieces to make us feel safe, eh.  Oh yeah, to garnish the contractors pockets too.  

Now the real question is, who gets the money to build the crap. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 06:35 | 4747711 loonyleft
loonyleft's picture

no. It was Obama! Obama! Obama! Obama! It's always Obama! Obama! Obama!

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:55 | 4747761 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Wait, it's not Bush's fault? And the dead white guys on the dollar bills?

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:45 | 4747380 Sages wife
Sages wife's picture

Soon, what he will really need is his 'clothes' back.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:52 | 4747398 BorisTheBlade
BorisTheBlade's picture

That if he doesn't appoint himself a lifetime president. What could stop him after Constitution is thrown away?

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:05 | 4747430 Jreb
Jreb's picture

No worries there. Hillary is next in line and if you thought Barry was bas wait until you get a psychotic, bitter murdering bitch in the oval office.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:56 | 4747505 old naughty
old naughty's picture

wait, you mean she'd still need the OVAL office?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:46 | 4747562 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

Can you prove ANY of that? Didn't think so.  What are republicans offering against Hillary.  Nobody with the experience or chops.  Jesus... you want ANOTHER "gee, Washington is bad, so... I'll go work in Washington" person?

 

JESUS 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:09 | 4747584 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

You still think there are two parties that differ materially in ideology? You prefer a government is good, so we wil create more government fascist? Interesting.

Pewblik Skewl worked its magic on you.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 05:10 | 4747681 blentus
blentus's picture

I envy people like you. Life must be simple in that black and white world.

Ignorance is bliss, they said. I didn't listen :(

 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:02 | 4747771 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Outside of the documented evidence of Steven's requesting (begging really) for increased security and being turned down by his "good friend" Hitlary in favor of locals with AK's?

Well no, I guess not.

But we don't have to prove anything anymore, Harry "Tax Cheat" Reid lowered the bar into the dirt, an accusation can just be hurled now (truth or lie doesn't matter) so on average everyone saves $2,500 a year on health insurance (its like a Geico commercial or sumpin), and they keep their doctor, which also vindicates Nana "400,000 jobs almost immediately" Pelosi's claims of funemployment and eagles can be killed by the thousands cuz the money's already been spent and millionaires can become billionaires cuz its good for statist-cronyism and food stamp usage can soar like poets writing of dead eagles moldering in the sun.

Because of proof & truth. "What difference does it make?!?"

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:00 | 4747820 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

.

What are republicans offering against Hillary[?]

[...]

JESUS

Well, not only...

I'm not pushing the red/blue livery shit, this just jumped out at me, so I ran with it.

 

Oh, and Donovan called - he wants his "m'fing tambourine" back.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 11:40 | 4748105 CHX
CHX's picture

Well, I think the republicans are correct to offer a "nobody" and let the ship sink under a democratic captain... probably obama when DDay2 arrives, else HC (?). Little difference it will make. It's past the point where "change" (in politics) will do to get out of the mess the U.S. are now in, way too late. Best hope is a smooth crash (no second civil war) and start over from scratch, with a honest and constitution respcting head of the nation. There are still many good people in the US, so that's my hope for them. Good luck to all, there's a rough and very bumpy streach of road ahead.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:37 | 4747970 Jreb
Jreb's picture

Actually - you got me there. I can't prove any of it. I therefore retract my obnoxious statement. I kinda feel bad about it - not because I might have offendded Hillary. I still don't like her - but too much wine, disgust and hyporbole is bad for the soul.

To be honest I think it might be time for a ZH vacation. I'm starting to care too much about the state of the world again. Also very unhealthy.

G'bye all.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:17 | 4747590 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

It wouldn't maintain the appearance that voters choose their leaders with elections.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:47 | 4747388 Pairadimes
Pairadimes's picture

Caligula, your chariot awaits.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:03 | 4747424 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Car bonne foolprint

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:56 | 4747403 Dead Man Walking
Dead Man Walking's picture

If you need 8" armor on your limo when you are in your own country... you're doing it wrong.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:29 | 4747472 The man with po...
The man with pointy horns's picture

Yep, worked for Kennedy.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:42 | 4747553 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Secret Service agents are Treasury agents (read: Federal Reserve, essentially).

Invariably their job is to protect their greatest aset.  Other times...not so much...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xEK16kLHsM

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:14 | 4747843 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

no, they are not... they've been part of DHS since 2003... a treasury agent is a different animal altogether

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 12:46 | 4748214 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Thanks for the correction.  My comment should be modified then to include *traditionally were* as was the case with JFK.

And we all know the DHS is clearly an agency of the people's interest....

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:09 | 4747585 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

A-fucking-men!!!

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:36 | 4747610 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

when you need to disarm your troops before you talk to them you are definitely doing something wrong

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 22:59 | 4747415 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

What!??! No extreme golf cart!?!?

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:10 | 4747437 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Picture me rollin' bitches.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:13 | 4747447 Matt
Matt's picture

I'm the head of the motherfuckin' State nigga.

I brought you change, nigga.

What the fuck you thinkin' nigga?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ-hPNrKdZI

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:41 | 4747489 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

"I'm tha president, of tha fuckin USA"

Ahhhahahahhaha! Brilliant.  Thanks Matt.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:45 | 4747807 BustainMovealota
BustainMovealota's picture

LOL  ,  now thats funny

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:10 | 4747438 franciscopendergrass
franciscopendergrass's picture

Can't the asshole just Skype instead of travelling abroad?  He doesn't have to be worried about being spied on like the rest of us peons.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:13 | 4747446 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

I prefer my '97 Ford Explorer 4wd

 

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:21 | 4747457 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 

You have to measure fuel efficiency in CPG centimeters per gallon for those vehicles. At least they have good headroom for the Wookie...

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:23 | 4747462 RichardParker
RichardParker's picture

delete

 

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:30 | 4747473 NOZZLE
NOZZLE's picture

Forrest Ghetto Hump looks like a mouth breathing MORON sitting in that idiotic limousine.

Anyone else remeber that those Canadian Built  motorhomes were supposed to be used for the Bummer of Recovery Tour in 2010 or was that 2011, 2012, 2013, 29014, 2015, 2016, oh well.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:31 | 4747475 Stinko da Munk
Stinko da Munk's picture

I dream of a time when the leader of our country is actually popular in our country and people are pleased to see him or her.  Hiding behind near a foot of bullet proof armor says a lot about our government and our leaders.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:34 | 4747542 Babaloo
Babaloo's picture

Are you really that stupid? There are so many fucking nuts in this country (shit, all you have to do is read ZH) with guns that the President hasn't been safe in decades.

It has nothing to do with the person in office and everything to do with the trash people this country produces.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:53 | 4747570 Zero Point
Zero Point's picture

If only everyone was like you, and did what they were told, huh Babaloo?

Then they wouldn't be "trash" right?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:15 | 4747588 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

There are so many fucking nuts in this country

Yep...we call them government. They have all the guns, a monopoly on force, and the right to order everybody else around....in the land of the free...where all men were created equal. Oh...seems some are in fact moar equal....oops!

has nothing to do with the person in office and everything to do with the trash people this country produces.

Where else would all that trash gravitate towards? What better employer than government? There they will have all the guns, and a monopoly on coercion. If this country produces such trash, what is the logic behind handing any of its trash, all the guns, and a monopoly on coercion?

Next logicall fallacies please?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:07 | 4747834 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Jeeeeeeeeeeeesuuuuuuuuuuuus. Dude, that is a real nasty denial habit you got there.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:39 | 4747487 drunkenlout
drunkenlout's picture

Why can't he just get a pimped out deuce-and-a-quarter, with curb feelers and fuzzy dice?  Who'da fuck he think he be?  Never hit an NBA 3-pointer; never even played college ball, or even high school... and he struttin' aroun like he just won some podunk State champpen-ship!  Sheeee-it!

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:08 | 4747836 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

.

a pimped out deuce-and-a-quarter, with curb feelers and fuzzy dice?

Finally, someone with a more refined taste in modern conveyances.

Sat, 05/10/2014 - 23:53 | 4747497 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

The POTUS got a quarter tank of gas, in his new E class. but that's alright, cause he's still fly

have you ever seen the crocodile seats in the truck? turn around and sit it down and let em bite your butt.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:12 | 4747519 kurt
kurt's picture

Why, It gives the perfect illusion of prosperity!

Wait a minute, let me jump into my bat copter!

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:15 | 4747523 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

stupid weird racist bullshit - none of these are Obama's, they all belong to US Government -

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:30 | 4747537 chemystical
chemystical's picture

"stupid weird racist bullshit - none of these are Obama's, they all belong to US Government"

Don't tell the wookie; she'll probably one-up the Clinton's when it comes to pilfering government property.  Anyone remember the denials, then the backpedalling when the truth came out about the Clintons' pilfering of White House furnishings? 

"What?  These were on the National Park Service's registry of donations for the 1993 redecoration project?  I thought we could take them and the bath soap and towels too."

 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:40 | 4747550 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

Gotta say your wookie reference is also stupid weird racist bullshit

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:58 | 4747624 Bear
Bear's picture

Why does it always have to be 'racist'
I really hope Ben Carson runs and wins just to shut up all you haters who cry racist at every critism of Mr. Obama

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 04:45 | 4747675 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Actually, when it comes to the woook, I think 'specist' is more like it..

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:55 | 4747818 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

#BringBackOurRepublic

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:58 | 4747823 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

? "Always" ?

If Black Man In Authority Position + Expensive/Protective Transportation = Pimp, then Someone = Racist

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:56 | 4748000 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Daily Kos called and they want you to be home before the streetlights come on.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:13 | 4748252 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

PNAC called, they said you forgot to pick up their dry cleaning, and please focus on accuracy when taking messages at the front desk, and you screwed up the lunch order last time.  

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 02:02 | 4747625 Bear
Bear's picture

I think the Democrats use racist just to shut down discussion ... I even heard it in the IRS Congressional debates on CSpan in a reference to Lois Lerner ... WTF ... She Lilly white

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:13 | 4747778 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Like Fauxcahontas. The frauds MAssholes typically send to the Senate are an embarrassment to the republic, but the media treats them like royalty for the most part. They are seriously talking up how warren's feelings got all hurt because it was her truth in her family tradition that somewhere way back there was a native American egg or sperm in the mix.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 03:51 | 4747649 R-502
R-502's picture

Its Bush's fault and your a racist...right Dickhead

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 05:17 | 4747684 blentus
blentus's picture

Racism antisemitism terrorism child-porn save the children they hate us for our freedoms and way of life.

Ok, I think I covered them all, you can really stop posting now.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 04:23 | 4747663 CaptainSpaulding
CaptainSpaulding's picture

What is a wookie?  Isn't that  a line from the Adams family theme?  "Their all together wookie, The Adams family"

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:42 | 4747552 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

These are not "pimped out" rides, which would be a bunch of ornamental, aesthetic changes (fuzzy dice, gold plated gear shifter, etc.).  His transportation is all part of a system that keeps him and the US safe, and honors his position by not degrading the act of travel.  He should be able to work, think and travel comfortably. WTF is wrong with you people. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:20 | 4747595 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

A bullet-proof party bus, Cadillac, and custom 747 keep us safe? How so?

and honors his position by not degrading the act of travel.

For the rest of us, there are ritualistic TSA gropings....in the land of the free...where all are created equal however, some are still more equal than others.

 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:55 | 4747816 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

I didn't say the TSA acts rationally.  I can't determine that.  I don't know about securing our airports with the number of airplanes and travellers in modern times.  I am saying that keeping the President safe and well appointed reduces stress, and it shows a relationship between the taxpayer and the president that is supportive.  Symbolically that's very good.  It should also keep him safe.  WTF is wrong with you people.

The president can protect us against foreign invasion better than you can.  Think about it.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:35 | 4747875 chemystical
chemystical's picture

"I am saying that keeping the President safe and well appointed reduces stress,"

And what does keeping THE WOOKIE lavishly well-apppointed (and well-fed, and well-dressed [at times - other times she embarassingly looks like 200 lbs of baloney stuffed into a 100 lb sack picked from the Wal-Mart clearance rack] and well-travelled) do for us?  Oh, wait, never mind, I know - it's symbolic. 

If there was ever a more clear demonstration of the public's ignorance and conditioning it's that THE WOOKIE placed 3rd on a list of most admired First Ladies.  Neither you nor 99% of those respondents can name ONE FUCKING THING that she has done (aside from spout hate for America...while she and her friends travel the world on the American public's dime).

 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:45 | 4748332 Emergency Ward
Emergency Ward's picture

hoo goo  If you are unable to determine that the TSA acts irrationally when it appoints itself as the mandatory genital-probing agency, why do you believe you can rationally judge the accoutrement level of the President?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:21 | 4748281 Emergency Ward
Emergency Ward's picture

Well, inside a quiet Escalade, the President could give the order to "Drone Yemen" without being misunderstood as ordering "Drone Yellen".

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:17 | 4748266 Emergency Ward
Emergency Ward's picture

 

 

  • "Support the Self-Esteem of Our Leaders, Right or Wrong"
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:17 | 4748269 Emergency Ward
Emergency Ward's picture

 

 

  • "Genuflect in the Presence of The Elected Ones"
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:24 | 4747746 Infinite QE
Infinite QE's picture

Which all belong to Israel. Anyone remember the events of 9/11 when the zionists masterminds of the event took control of Air Force One?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:20 | 4747849 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

I am fairly certain the life-size reclining nude of Moms Mabley painting on black velvet doesn't belong belong to the US Government. And I dare say Bubba wouldn't have left it.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 13:08 | 4748249 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

Listen you 23+ nattering nabobs of negativism - YOU specify a chopper that can seamlessly integrate with AWACS and coordinate a response to a world war on 2 fronts with anti-EMP, anti-land-to-missile countermeasures, full-spectrum communications, whatever fuel-refueling capabilities, probably floats, is probably bulletproof, and can hold the president's family (yes, he needs them with them to reduce his emotional stress in case of attack on US), can probably fly for like 5 hours straight at top speed. 

He's our president. Get behind him.  WTF is wrong you with you people.

THINK.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 14:44 | 4748483 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

You really think this president could "specify a chopper that can seamlessly integrate with AWACS and coordinate a response to a world war on 2 fronts with anti-EMP, anti-land-to-missile countermeasures, full-spectrum communications, blah blah woof woof...."

This president can't specify how many states are in the union or what city he's in. His technical prowess is limited to using a Blackberry and choosing what club to use on the back nine.

....nattering nabobs of negativism...

Is that you Spiro? How's Mrs. Agnew?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:21 | 4747528 European American
European American's picture

Air Force One

"Jams enemy radar"?

"Throws off heat seeking missiles?

 

Putins state of the art technology could bring it down...wishful thinking.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:23 | 4747530 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Some thick steam coming from the on board bath house, hard to see through that shit.  On purpose too, means you gotta feel your way round.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:30 | 4747539 European American
European American's picture

Barry's Mile High Club, gots lots of initiates.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 12:02 | 4748151 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

I think I'd be reticent about feeling my way around the steamed up confines on board of Barry's Bathhouse One.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 00:38 | 4747547 Hurdy Gurdy Man
Hurdy Gurdy Man's picture

(accidental repost)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:16 | 4747589 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

I would like to see that motherfucker get a flat (even with the whatever fucking runflat shit he has in those things) just once, and I would like to see him on film changing a tire.  Just fucking once..  I want some real life comedy.  Instead, this fuck provides us with a freak/horror show.  Holy hell, lakecity55's jokes about "lugnuts" would be worth it by themselves.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:11 | 4747780 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Remember this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yo5zH0Il8B0 They only need some circus music and to have clowns pour out of the trunk. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 01:32 | 4747604 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

stop me if i'm wrong, potus just flew to san diego on air force one to meet san diegos second richest person, irwin jacobs, i am not sure because mitt romney has a home (one of many)  in la jolla also, although obama raising campaign contributions at a republicans house might seem odd, (they both live in la jolla) it seems equally odd that despite irwins giving obama lots of money, that the democrats in san diego cant win an election for dog catcher. its pretty much a probusiness republican town. now if you dont give a crap about the poor democrats in your community (hispanic and black and anyone with a job) but you fall all over yourself when an out of town democrat comes passing the hat, what does that mean? well a long time ago i stopped trying to  figure out what the democrats stood for. my point of all this being, that the potus flies on air force one and taxpayers pay the bill (stop me if i am wrong, i want to thing that when the potus travels to campaign he pays out of his own pocket)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:36 | 4747688 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

That's nothing. President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho had a cool trike with a cooler of beer aboard bitchez.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 05:37 | 4747690 AGoldhamster
AGoldhamster's picture

top news: academi (blackwater) fighting for ukraine

http://www.spiegel.de/politik/ausland/ukraine-krise-400-us-soeldner-von-...

Fuck all those stinking warlords!

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 05:55 | 4747698 muleskinner
muleskinner's picture

If I were the president, I'd quit immediately.

I would never want the job, it pays a meager 400 k and you have to kiss everybody's ass day in and day out and somebody won't be happy with what you do, so they just might come lookin' for your ass one day so you divert your travel plans and climb aboard Air Force One and find a place where there is some refuge and it won't matter how much it costs just get me out of here so nobody knows where I am.

There are better things to do than to be a president of a country that is fast becoming a shithole because of what the president does or does not do.

You're not going to be a hero, it is one thankless job and when you leave office there will be no place to go and no place to hide.

It is just a matter of time your brain will be addled beyond hope.  Look at Bill Clinton, zombie nonpareil.

No thanks.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 06:10 | 4747703 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

they get paid another ten to twenty million after they get out by the people they helped. still chump change to the billionaires. they really are just plebes.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:49 | 4747983 franciscopendergrass
franciscopendergrass's picture

What about the multi-million dollar book deal, pension, security, and $250k plus speaking engagements?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 11:05 | 4748015 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

And the free cases of Old English 800 Malt liquor.

Yo.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 07:06 | 4747726 AdvancingTime
AdvancingTime's picture

Mommas in America were discouraged in a song many years ago from letting their children grow up to be cowboys, it appears to have been a reasonable decision. Today after viewing the lifestyles associated with many career paths, politics and the route of so called "public service" seems to offer much potential.

A career in politics can grant you a lifestyle where you, and oftentimes your family will get to rub elbows with the ultra wealthy and the country's most powerful titans of business and industry. This career choice also has the benefit of sheltering you, and extending legal protection that covers you from the responsibilities of your actions. Flying about in private planes politicians are rewarded with generous pensions and superior healthcare benefits far outside the reach of the average citizen. More on this subject below.

http://brucewilds.blogspot.com/2013/01/encourage-your-children-to-become...

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:05 | 4747775 22winmag
22winmag's picture

The closing scene of "The Wilby Conspiracy" would be a fitting end for POTUS and his rides.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:17 | 4747787 pies_lancuchowy
pies_lancuchowy's picture

If you like your 1,2 billion helicopter, you can keep your 1,2 billion helicopter.

If you like your food insecurity, you can keep your food insecurity.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 08:47 | 4747809 BustainMovealota
BustainMovealota's picture

"unless the US constitution is changed enough to allow the current president to serve indefinitely"  --  You think this won't happen,,,,  better think again. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:27 | 4747863 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Constitution? We don' need no steenkin' constitution.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:08 | 4747924 FLHRS
FLHRS's picture

Skillfully preceded by a superbly timed war.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:59 | 4748005 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

We'll have a choice:  1) That war will be nuclear, and it won't matter if you're rich or poor, an oligarch or a slave, employed or unemployed or, 2) we'll have a choice of putting our oil towards food production or war, and the war will cause more problems than it distracts us from. 

 

Choice 2 gets a lot more complex than can be described in one sentence, but I think that enough people are aware that there is some serious bullshit going on that it won't be the kind of distraction that our government and our oligarchs would believe it to be.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 12:16 | 4748175 BidnessMan
BidnessMan's picture

What makes you think Hillary would allow this?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 09:41 | 4747891 Youri Carma
Youri Carma's picture

Talkin bout Pimp Rides - Eight-wheeled Cadillac Eldorado with hot tub & barbecue up for auction https://imgur.com/gallery/d1Wi4

The Pimp Ride http://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/9a6430d4563117096d235131df9deec3-tread...

The Pimp Walk http://img.pandawhale.com/90831-Kramer-pimp-walk-gif-Seinfeld-Xi94.gif

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:28 | 4747955 optimator
optimator's picture

Hillary may adapt to a new style of cruising so the peons can at least see her,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGlpel3U1eA

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 10:54 | 4747996 Spungo
Spungo's picture

What about the presidential golf cart?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 19:50 | 4749259 Fiat Envy
Fiat Envy's picture

By the time they finish building the new helicopter a billion might not buy a monsanto burger.

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