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Angela Merkel On The Ledge: "This Is Not Fair... I Am Not Going To Commit Suicide"

Tyler Durden's picture


What is most remarkable about the following detailed FT profile of the Cannes November 3-4, 2011 G-20 summit (when Europe, knowing well virtually every other option had been exhausted and was forced to grovel for Chinese cash)... not that Obama, facing an election and fearful of what a Eurozone disintegration and depression would mean to the US economy and more importantly, to his re-election chances,  managed to bring German chancellor Angela Merkel to tears, which he did...

To the astonishment of almost everyone in the room, Angela Merkel began to cry.


Das ist nicht fair.” That is not fair, the German chancellor said angrily, tears welling in her eyes. “Ich bringe mich nicht selbst um.” I am not going to commit suicide.


For those who witnessed the breakdown in a small conference room in the French seaside resort of Cannes, it was shocking enough to watch Europe’s most powerful and emotionally controlled leader brought to tears.


But the scene was even more remarkable, those present said, for the two objects of her ire: the man sitting next to her, French President Nicolas Sarkozy, and the other across the table, US President Barack Obama.




The US president asked whether Ms Merkel could work it out with the Bundesbank by Monday. Mr Sarkozy suggested finance ministers meet to agree the details before the summit ended the next day. Perhaps something vague could be mentioned in the summit’s communiqué, Mr Obama suggested. No, said Mr Sarkozy, but we could meet again in the morning.


It was as if the two men had not heard her. She made the point again: “I’m not going to take such a big risk without getting anything from Italy. I’m not going to commit suicide.”

No, the real news is that even as Europe was facing near certain disintegration, it still was unwilling to make the compromises necessary to move away from a pseudo-union, one which is neither a federation where joint bond issuance is possible and where members are ratably responsible for each other, nor where the countries are wiling to cede soverignty to the most stable and viable entity in order to spread risk.

Mr Sarkozy attempted to manage the three-way impasse. The US wanted Germany to contribute its SDRs but Germany was only willing to give a partial commitment if Italy gave in on the IMF programme. Giulio Tremonti, Italy’s finance minister, held firm: Rome would accept IMF monitoring but no programme. Would the Italian monitoring plan, plus a commitment by Germany to contribute bilateral loans, be enough, Mr Sarkozy asked.


“No. Germany has one-fourth of all [eurozone] SDR allocations,” Mr Obama objected. “If you have all the EU countries together but not Germany . . . it starts losing credibility.”




The leaders met again the next morning but the momentum was gone. “The storm was over,” said one person at both meetings. The SDR plan would never again see the light of day. Italy would get a monitoring programme but no funding. And to compound the failure, Mr Berlusconi at his closing news conference publicly acknowledged what everyone had assiduously attempted to keep secret: that the IMF had offered him a rescue programme. Italy would suffer the stigma of needing a rescue but without receiving any assistance.


The Cannes failure provided new oxygen to the eurozone fire. When markets reopened, Italian borrowing costs soared. Within the week they would nearly touch 7.5 per cent. Greece’s would go above 33 per cent, a level almost without precedent for a developed country. Now, with no new firewall in place, it was unclear what would save the euro.

There is more in the full report by Peter Spiegel, but for those who lived through each and every trial balloon headline, what happened next is a clear memory: Goldman's recent ascendent to the head of the ECB, Mario Draghi, sent Italian bond yields soaring in the process forcing Berlusconi to quit, Greece's G-Pap also quit after his failed referendum gambit, and the one thing that prevented the all out collapse of the Eurozone, was the (latest) US-Funded global bailout of November 30, 2011.

And ever since then it has been one lie after another, starting with Draghi's "Whatever it takes" bluff to prevent the collapse the Euro, knowing full well the ECB is unable to monetize bonds at will like the US Fed (in his own words), and which has since transformed to a "whatever it takes" to push the Euro lower (confirming that the Eurozone is only viable in a EURUSD 1.20-1.40 corridor, and proceeding with the OMT "program" which still doesn't actually exist, nearly two years after its introduction.

So what has happened in Europe since the fateful Cannes G-20 summit in 2011 which made Merkel cry? Why nothing. Absolutely nothing has changed, that infamous austerity which everyone hates never actually happened (those confused about this are urged to look at all time record high (and rising fast) debt numbers across the Eurozone periphery), and worst of all, that most important Keynesian variable - private sector loan growth - never picked up. As the chart below shows, Eurozone lending to private business remains at a record low, and very deflationary, -2.2%.

The reason: since European government merely kicked the can courtesy of yet another global central bank "put" exercise, all the politicians were spared the dread of actually implementing painful reforms. So what did Europe do? It changed the definition of GDP sufficiently to make Spain and Italy appear as if the two fulcrum nations are growing, and also suckered US hedge funds and private equity firms to chase after European non-performing loans and bad debt, now that the scramble for distressed real estate is finally over as US housing has finished its fourth dead cat bounce.

But at least Merkel did not have to cry any more, as the return of the Deutsche Mark was delayed by a few more years, at the expense of all those peripheral workers (the lucky ones who did not lose their job of course) who devoid of the capacity for an external, FX, rebalancing have seen their wages crater for years, just so Germany can keep its export machine humming courtesy of a cheaper currency.

We wonder if once the effect of the liquidity tsunami fades alongside the Fed taper (especially since the ECB's bluff of full, Fed-style QE will remain nothing more than just that, a bluff), and European bonds are finally reacquainted with selling, in turn sending the continent in yet another recession because, we will repeat again, nothing in Europe has been fixed, whether European stubbornness wins out again, and the member nations would opt out for disintegration of the most artificial union in history, or whether Angela Merkel will cry one final time?


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Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:58 | 4749443 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

What's new about nothing being fixed?  We've had a broken economy since before 2008 and it's only patched over with paper.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:59 | 4749449 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Some cruel bastard said she looked like Janet Yellen?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:00 | 4749453 The Juggernaut
The Juggernaut's picture

USD and EUR collapse at the same time to unveil a single currency.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:03 | 4749461 Latina Lover
Latina Lover's picture

Cry for me, Germany.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:06 | 4749471 old naughty
old naughty's picture

Fast forward to 2014...

Guess the banker deaths have not spread to politicians, yet?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:26 | 4749528 markmotive
markmotive's picture

Isn't she being bugged anyway? Just check the recordings if you want proof.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:29 | 4749531 i-dog
i-dog's picture

It's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye ... or a country.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:42 | 4749568 max2205
max2205's picture

Fuck that bitch......

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:49 | 4749586 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

I'm gonna take 'crying' as a good sign... something human.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:51 | 4749594 American Dreams
American Dreams's picture

This story is bullshit.  No way Obama projects even this inept level of statemanship.  No way for Sark either, just no way.


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:37 | 4749786 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture



Merkel knows that Obozo and Putin control her (and the euroweenies) fate...

And that scares the shit out of her!

I can't say I blame her one bit.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:38 | 4749870 BTFDemocracy
BTFDemocracy's picture

If dual currency collapse, then single currency.

If single currency, then time to buy Bitcoin.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:33 | 4749938 Mistress Raindrop
Mistress Raindrop's picture

Angie, don't you weep.  All your kisses felt so sweet.  Hate that sadness in your eyes.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 04:01 | 4750067 Lore
Lore's picture

Mistress Raindrop = Bot. DO NOT CLICK.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 04:39 | 4750083 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

BIG mistake putting Germany into a corner!

Look what happened the last time.

Soon we will see those swastika banners flying again.

Nicht gut!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 06:20 | 4750144 negative rates
negative rates's picture

I think she was crying because we don't have, and can't find her gold and the bills coming due. 

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 06:39 | 4750160 old naughty
old naughty's picture

tell her:

"woman (eh Angie) on a ledge, you don't have to copy Sam Worthington, after all, he's after a diamond."

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:42 | 4749878 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Remember when George came up behind her and gave her a quickie backrub?  Skeletons and water, closets and bridges.  Lots.

I am Chumbawamba.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:26 | 4749857 adeptish
adeptish's picture

Three year old  hear-say garbage story, not impressed Tyler...

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:45 | 4749964 August
August's picture

Never happened.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:54 | 4749601 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

"the ECB's bluff of full, Fed-style QE will remain nothing more than just that, a bluff"

the article is saying that the euro is in no danger of being over-printed, and therefore the euro will continue to be strong

this is very bullish for the zh-reader's Euro play

grabbing them up, hand over fist. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:43 | 4749808 daveO
daveO's picture

At least until Draghi meets with an unfortunate accident?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:55 | 4749607 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Wait...viewing the rather copious amounts of " suicide" bankers recently, the extrodinarily amount of bio techs dead in the 00's, would this comment by a ruler of Germany be viewed as concrete evidence to the masses that fucking every reporting suicide is suspect?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:48 | 4749707 noless
noless's picture

People don't just up and commit suicide, usually it's preceded by a concerted campaign of psychological harassment, generally imperceptible to the outside observer because it has to do with deeply private memory triggers not recognized by anyone besides the individual or those within the campaign..

That being said I'm sure there are "well adjusted happy fun loving" individuals who just decide to jump out a window one day, but I'm guessing it's not that frequent.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 07:09 | 4750188 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

I think that is what got old Adolf so down too, down in that bunker. ( Or maybe it was T-34s and special NKVD squads 100 meters away constantly playing Alexanders Rag Time Band over and over...)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:20 | 4749752 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

I think it was political suicide she was alluding to, but when was the last time you heard someone who wasn't a kid protest that something wasn't fair? Who said the world was fair? That's something that comes out of the mouth of someone younger than a middle-schooler, not an adult. I thought she could hold her own with the big boys. Adults know things are often not fair and don't generally whine and cry about it. You either take the chocolate or you don't. Apparently she did.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:51 | 4749818 daveO
daveO's picture

Most women are children. They always cry to get their way. It's their 'go to' tactic. Hillary almost used it at the hearings. Then, knowing that would cost her, shreaked instead. A suitable alternative emotional outburst. 

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:13 | 4749846 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

To be fair most men are children as well.  Different tactics; same service to self.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:20 | 4749853 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

Personally, I never could squeeze out tears to get my way, but if I get angry enough I cry - its beyond my control and frankly mortifying. Tears don't work for very long, if at all, as a means of getting ones way. Men become inured to tears pretty quickly. I always found withholding sex to be a much more effective means of getting what I wanted if I wanted it badly enough, and that tactic stood the test of time. 

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:24 | 4749856 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

Merkel tried that already.  It......... didn't work.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:31 | 4749864 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

I bet it works for her with Herr Merkel.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:53 | 4749874 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture



HM: "kann ich berühre die hiney, meine Frau?"
FM: "NEIN!  
Bring den Müll raus und reibe meine Füße!!!" 

HM: "awwww...... Ich bin ein geilerMerkel....."

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:00 | 4749893 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

"I always found withholding sex to be a much more effective means of getting what I wanted if I wanted it badly enough, and that tactic stood the test of time"

Thats the worse tactic you could use, it's never worked since the beginning of time.  Wake him up with a BJ instead.  He'll love you for it and won't think you're a whore.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:10 | 4749899 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

Good advice- Always worked for my dad.  His lover was putty in his hands. 

Dad likes to overshare.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:11 | 4749906 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

Withholding sex from your wife is not good advice.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:13 | 4749909 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

I meant the bj.  Nevamind.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:19 | 4749923 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

That didn't clarify anything.  Dads lover being putty in his hands?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 05:17 | 4750098 BigJim
BigJim's picture

The implication is that his Dad is gay.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 11:18 | 4750848 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

hmmmm....... my dad would call that a "sticky situation".

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 02:38 | 4750016 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

I'm not talking about things. It was politics and war.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 05:18 | 4750100 BigJim
BigJim's picture

 I always found withholding sex to be a much more effective means of getting what I wanted if I wanted it badly enough, and that tactic stood the test of time.

I suspect Merkel found that didn't work with the Big 0.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 09:17 | 4750437 Pumpkin
Pumpkin's picture

You are absolutely correct, just look at Boehner.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:15 | 4749839 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

...A great 'piece' explaining the quantum physics that our governments/elites and of course ALL religions have used and worshiped for thousands of years.....TIME/SPACE (time is sin, space is matter) now you too can avail yourself of high physics through your programmed religion and CERN. All roads lead to Rome...which Italy USED to be called and known by the OLD world as really ALL YOUR WORLD is and has been created by saturn. Today your stupid sychopaths that own you through the dollar/currency.....have NO TIME LEFT...eeeeehhhhhhhh.....and they think their ''god particle'' CERN is going to replace SATURN. I know we all know today.....that the royal families of europe are truly inbred idiots.....but la rouche....the vatican jesuit pedophiles.....and of course the bush ego maniacs of the many luciferian clubs, aka free masonic doo doo's...and the like, are going CRAZY......cause they aren't god, and their 'light barrier' isn't holding up ITS end! which is funny, cause its dickless anyway!



Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:23 | 4749854 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

Time is Money

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:37 | 4749871 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

On a long enough timeline...

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 05:19 | 4750101 BigJim
BigJim's picture

You used to make sense. What happened?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 08:05 | 4750252 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

2 bottles of wine...

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 05:31 | 4750107 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

I love a good rant, but you lost me at "..."

Was there a point you wanted to make?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 03:20 | 4750047 Bahamas
Bahamas's picture

With your dick

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:54 | 4749606 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

"Cry for me, Germany."

Hamburg, Germany 1962: 

Recommended setting:  LOUD

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:33 | 4749784 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

Suicide she says.


Maybe it has something to do with Germany siding with the BRICS and CO,  60+% of their oil comes from the "Ruskies".

Wasn't DOUCHE BANK holding like 70 trillion in worthless derivatives, that form the pillar of 1,000 trillion sheets of freestanding paper on a vertical string?


Thats gonna sting a bit..


The big question I have, is how are we going to add a G to BRICS?



FUCK Psycho child molesting shape shifting reptile mother* fucking squids!!!!





* For Mothers. Happy Mothers day.


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:53 | 4749822 daveO
daveO's picture

G+BRICS = Free World.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:54 | 4749824 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

BRICSaG-spot ???

I dunno, but the BRICS associates, Germans and private owners of the City of London will not suffer like the rest of us.

BTW, can any ZHr advise if is there a unique private entity equivelant to the City of London in the USA?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:47 | 4749882 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

In 1871 they formed it. Its a corporation out of deleware that turned into a state (curiously). There may be alot of dumbasses here in the USA, But American Values do not support these fucks!!

There is good too. Just like everywhere.

The Achilles is physical silver...least bloodshed. Buy the living ass out of it.


Hammer it at 16-18.17..and buy as markets default like raindrops in a typhoon. Non dependence is a key for this phase. It does not guarantee safe passage, just better house odds.


You and I are going camping for 6 months...... pack NOW!!


Thats my plan. Its fucked I just cant live a happy life without fuckshit stains...meddling.



Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:27 | 4749933 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

Ahh I understand Murdoch moved Newscorp to Deleware. Australia and its states & apparel are apparently listed as corporations on the SEC; dunno if thats a Deleware thing to.

Anyhooo nice to know City of London and Deleware (corp of USA?Aust? etc???) are both above soverignty.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 02:51 | 4750030 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

They fake what we cant make...reality.


let them try.





Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:08 | 4749480 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

We shall see. And soon.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:14 | 4749495 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Juggernaut, with all due respect, these motherfuckers are too goddamned stupid to make it happen.  They're a lot closer to staring collapse and disintegration in the face than they are some great and glorious victory via one-world-currency (or one world government).  

In their minds, they're winning.  In reality, the rest of the world is laughing that them for their utter stupidity and hubris.  

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:27 | 4749527 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

Well said.  I've known a few sociopaths in my day.  The guys I knew were small time versions, but I think they all have a common trait -- they think they are the smartest guy in the room, even when they are not.  They often win just as bullies often take over the playground.  But they also fail, and fail badly.  

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:24 | 4749655 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

You can hear all of Merkel's telephone conversations if you tune your radio in to "NSA 99.4 FM" ...or "CIA 101.8 AM" 24/7.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:02 | 4749737 noless
noless's picture

What do you call someone who always thinks they're the dumbest person in the room?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:15 | 4749748 Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:21 | 4749758 remain calm
remain calm's picture

A Keysenian.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:25 | 4749759 remain calm
remain calm's picture


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:28 | 4749774 remain calm
remain calm's picture

Pesident of the United States of America.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:19 | 4749851 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

aka fudge packer in chief

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:20 | 4749852 Renewable Life
Renewable Life's picture

"Wolf of Wall Street" style fail!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 05:31 | 4750106 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

Nope not stupid, merely theatrical puppets for us to whine and rail against, in vain.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:41 | 4749565 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

EU: Hang together.

Separate states: Hang separately.


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:55 | 4749888 ThirdWorldDude
ThirdWorldDude's picture

Unfortunately, here in old stubborn Europe we don't have large enough lamp posts that can withstand the weight of the entire EU. They'll just have to hang separately like that. Fuck it, life's not a fair game.


(Hope Angie won't cry over that one)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:23 | 4749761 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

Yep, precisely what will happen.  Because in order to "save" and I use that very lightly the economy of the western world, they have to coordinate the implosion in order to coordinate the implementation of the new currency.



Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:54 | 4749719 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

If no video . . . it didn't happen.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:00 | 4749452 cifo
cifo's picture

I thought sociopaths are incapable of crying. Or maybe that wasn't empathy to begin with.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:09 | 4749482 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture


No, we can cry. It's just that what we cry about is different than for you.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:12 | 4749488 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Angela Merkel cried in 2011....that's where we are at...

Well the Yen just broke 102 and gold is down and yields are creepng back up off the red line so i'd say we just shifted heavily back towards Merkel doing 8 balls while the middle class gets bent over again.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:19 | 4749510 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

Merkel was just giving the middle class some lube with her tears.  A small gesture, but appreciated.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:25 | 4749523 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Horseshit.  Merkel knew that such a deal would make Germany (and by extension, her personally) a lot less relevant.

Even sociopaths know when they're threatened with having something important taken away from them.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:28 | 4749532 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

"Even sociopaths know when they're threatened with having something important taken away from them."

And THAT is the only time they cry.

My comment about lube for the middle class was just hyperbole.  She could give a flying fuck, and would prefer blood like all of her ilk.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:32 | 4749545 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Here, look. We get a monthly or quarterly article about how reverse repo's are done as windowdressing to make the banks look solvent when they are desperately starved for collateral. The fed came and and said "yup, and what the fuck are you gonna do about it?"

DUBAI—An experimental monetary policy tool that lets banks and financial firms place cash with the Federal Reserve in exchange for an overnight loan of U.S. Treasurys will likely be adopted as a more permanent means for the central bank to help control short-term interest rates, Atlanta Fed President Dennis Lockhart said on Sunday.
“Overall I am confident that reverse repos will be among our tool bag and therefore may very well have a role in how we try to influence short-term interest rates,” he said at an American Business Council of Dubai event at the Dubai International Financial Centre.
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:38 | 4749560 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

How is this not fraud?  And how does anyone who is involved in setting interest rates not know it is fraud?  Window dressing in a burning building owned by the mob with insurance on said building.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:46 | 4749582 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

It's pure genius. Make the banks so gigantic that if they fail the whole system goes under. Then make the banks so dependent on treasuries that the fed literally has to lend them some of their massive stockpile for collateral to remain solvent and the money markets stable. Viola. There is your financial system. Oh and if liquidity dries up the emerging markets that have the least amount of U.S paper burn down first. I mean wow..

The real reson Merkel cried was because Obama was hammered and was telling everyone at the table what he overheard on her cell.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:41 | 4749567 Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden's picture

Nothing new in that statement, which is just a rehash of what the Fed has already said. The full reverse repo explanation is here.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:04 | 4749573 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

From the linked past article:  "That also suggests that a perfectly centrally-planned market should be oblivious of counterparty (ownership less important than possession) risk, in order to preserve financial "lubrication".  We have a thread theme!

Also from the article:  "But for things to get there, the US banking system has to be ready and willing to allow the great asset bubble deleveraging, which also means having bought sufficient amounts of hard assets in advance, mostly from their clients, ahead of the great "paper asset" unrotation. Keep a close watch for even more aggressive "sell" recommendations for gold, silver, and everything else that can be nailed down..."  The great paper asset unrotation -- ribbed, for Yellen's pleasure.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 12:29 | 4751136 gcjohns1971
gcjohns1971's picture

What is the new thread theme?

Counter parties no longer need to be Solvent?

Only to have lubricant?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:38 | 4749688 Money Squid
Money Squid's picture

When the federal reserve/big banks can make the rules, keep confidential their transactions due to national security concerns, and have the accounting standards suspended how accurate is a detailed explanation of the new high finance? Why do you think the data from any of the top five banks or a fortune 100 company is even close to reality?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:16 | 4749920 Seer
Seer's picture

Have I mentioned here that humans are deceptive?

It's a shuffling for the "end game."  If one were to look to pull out too early then this might trigger a war.  So what's happening is that they are all working to confuse the fuck out of everyone to the point that everyone will be glad to pick up the marbles and head home.

The "leaders" were put in charge to keep the game going.  Many are starting to realize that they're in with weak hands (not their own, but the ones dealt them).  Better believe that there's all sorts of threats and blackmailing going on.  I think that Ukriane is a mini model of the entire picture, not that it was staged for demonstration.  Either get in bed with Ivan or get in bed with a feckless EU: if you look in the room and don't see a bitch...

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:45 | 4749576 Seer
Seer's picture

Deperate times bring desperate measures...  Have to hand it to them, they're sure working hard to make up all this shit!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:40 | 4749876 benb
benb's picture

...they're sure working hard to make up all this shit!

And have been from the start.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:35 | 4749552 Think for yourself
Think for yourself's picture

Exactly. The fact that they are clinically unable of empathy - including also self-empathy, that is, reflexive emotional intelligence - does not preclude them from exhibiting emotion-like behaviour.

The ego-concept is everything to someone deprived of empathy. Anything that diminishes or threatens the ego-concept is perceived as painful, while anything that augments or feeds it is perceived as pleasurable.

Hence the primitive emotionlike behavior of sociopaths, such as fear or anger directed at those who would reveal their ploys (as a predator that is fearful of its source of nourishment being removed) or Merkel's pain-like reaction as she realized the inevitability of a reduction in status and power. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:33 | 4749534 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

"I thought sociopaths are incapable of crying. Or maybe that wasn't empathy to begin with."

I guess someone has never spent time in the deep south and heard the expression "Gator Tears".

------ From Urban Dictionary

Gator Tears - Tears that are fake, or are meant to deceive. Same as crocodile tears.

Man, that bitch was totally faking it with those alligator tears.

Crocodile Tears - To pretend a sorrow that one doesn’t in fact feel, to create a hypocritical show of emotion. The idea comes from the ancient belief that crocodiles weep while luring or devouring their prey.

You see that bitch Jasmine Trias on American Idol last night with those crocodile tears?
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:48 | 4749813 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

"Robbie Parker Tears"

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 06:23 | 4750146 negative rates
negative rates's picture

All 96 of them.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:42 | 4749806 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

Yes, they cry when puppies and kittens escape their cage before they've had a chance to torture them.

And they Really cry when the sheep wake up and break out of their cages (and I'm not talking about the penned up 4 legged variety).

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:16 | 4749504 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

Chicks can cry.  Even sociopathic chicks can cry.  It is just the nature of the thing. 

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:05 | 4749625 cifo
cifo's picture

You guys are fucking great! That's why I love ZH.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:16 | 4749644 Amish Hacker
Amish Hacker's picture

When it gets serious, you have to lie cry.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:52 | 4749821 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture


"There sure were a lot of lie-cryers during Sandy Hoax."

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:14 | 4749900 Christophe2
Christophe2's picture

LOL.  Dude, I'm loving that you are keeping us on point with one of the best reminders of just what it means when someone on TV or in the newspaper is crying, showing us just how upset and vulnerable they are!

The only difference between Merkel and that Sandy Hoaxer is their relative grades in the satanic hierarchy.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:48 | 4749810 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

Yeah, but the psycho path chicks need to secretly stick themselves with a pin in order to produce tears for the audience.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:56 | 4749611 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

Merkel is not a Sociopath -- but she is ignorant, and completely unfit for the position she holds.

She knows it.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:56 | 4749826 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

The chances of her East German, career politician ass of not being a sociopath is just about 1 in 2 to the 64th. power (1:2^64). Give or take a few.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:15 | 4749847 Prisoners_dilemna
Prisoners_dilemna's picture

So you're saying there's a chance.  ;)

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:13 | 4749844 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

Ones soul must be sold to the devil, so-to-speak, to reach such 'dizzying heights of leadership' as Merkel has, requires that many deals and compromises must be made and almost all of these would disgust and exhaust a principled person. She, IMO is neither unfit for their plans (they woulda got rid of her last election if she went AWOL) and she is not ignorant (she'll keep Germany just fine in the West to East pivot we're watching).

BTW women often cry in anger and frustration, she was merely having an orchestrated hissy fit as suited the dramatic situation and she did her job well as she grimaced and pretended tears.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 02:06 | 4749990 Dublinmick
Dublinmick's picture

The Rothschild mansion probably beamed a message to cry to the chip in her ugly skull

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:47 | 4749704 acetinker
acetinker's picture

David Perdue's politcal ad may be more right than we want to imagine-  He depicts his opponents as babies in diapers on the White House lawn- I still don't trust the fucker, though.  Too slick.  Too slimy.  This is Georgia, though, and the 'good ol' boys' know how to play the game.

Cool.  So do I.  Fuck 'em all.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 03:22 | 4750049 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

The problem with this story is Obama does not know what an SDR is.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 07:01 | 4750169 Againstthelie
Againstthelie's picture

New is the amount of criminal energy of Merkel. She is withholding this crucial information from the German people, how Germany is blackmailed, she even calls these forces "friends"!

And on the other side: that these Plutocrats are portraying the EUSSR and their international organizations as peaceful.

Russia should be glad, that it is no longer part of this club!

But obviously they are instruments of terror. Nothing has changed:



When i came to power, i took over a nation which was a democracy. Indeed, as long as Germany was a democracy we saw that everyone in the world came to their help and aid. Yes, the German people used to live in a democracy, and had been plundered and squeezed dry. No, what does democracy or authoritarian state mean for those INTERNATIONAL HYENAS? They're not interested in either!

They are only interested in one thing: Is anyone willing to let themselfes be plundered, yes or no? Is anyone stupid enough to keep quiet in the process, yes or no? And when a democracy is stupid enough to keep quiet, then it is good! And when a authoritarian government declares: "You do not plunder our people any longer neither from the inside or outside, " then that is bad. (today: think about all the authoritarian states in the arabic world, that are alliies of the west)

If we, as a so called "authoritarian state", which differs from the democracies by having the people behind them -  (applause) If we as an authoritarian state had also complied with all the sacrifices that the INTERNATIONAL PLUTOCRATS burdened us with; if I had said in 1933, "Esteemed Sirs in Geneva what would you have me to do?" "Aha! We will immediately write on the slate: 6 billions for 1933, 1934, 1935, excellent, we will deliver! Is there anything else you would like? Yes, ofcourse, Sir, we will also deliver that!" Then they would have said: "At last a sensible regime in Germany."

November 8th, 1940, Adolf Hitler

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:58 | 4749444 news printer
news printer's picture

maybe she is not Reptilian after all ;)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:45 | 4749578 grunk
grunk's picture

Crocodiles are reptiles.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:59 | 4749445 Alethian
Alethian's picture


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:10 | 4749486 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

2011.  Not current events.  A point being made to show how nothing's changed since then.


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:59 | 4749447 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

When she kicked the can this time it went over the cliff instead of further down the road.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 20:59 | 4749448 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Next EU plan : have negative deposit rates starting in June so people are forced to spend their money (or start a bank run)...

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:03 | 4749457 QQQBall
QQQBall's picture

There's no crying in FX

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:57 | 4749612 BeetleBailey
BeetleBailey's picture

yeah...but there's a SHITLOAD OF what the fucks/god fucking damns/motherfucking Draghi/YellencuntJanellen/wankinfuckin bankers...and lastly..


Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:04 | 4749463 One And Only
One And Only's picture

Gay football players kissing. World leaders crying. What the fuck is this? Fuck this shit.

And people wonder why team Putin is popular?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:07 | 4749474 Charles Nelson ...
Charles Nelson Reilly's picture

"It's your front row seat to the freak show" - George Carlin

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:36 | 4749537 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

Speaking of freakshows...

I'd bet money that the bearded dude that won the Eurovision contest was probably in reality a carefully planned psy-op to help keep Muslim immigration to the Eurozone down.

(BTW... Isn't that the artist formerly known as Prince?)

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:20 | 4749512 Make_Mine_A_Double
Make_Mine_A_Double's picture

You forgot the Bearded Lady winning Euro Vision.

And Nintendo bent over to make cartoon queers for the Nord Amerwikkan version of next stupid game.

Sodomy weekend in the (dying) West.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 11:45 | 4750959 pies_lancuchowy
pies_lancuchowy's picture

BEARDED WOMEN winning 'Eurovision' contest, because other singers well not weird enough to compete


edit: I'm not the first person to notice the bearded woman.. thank God

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:04 | 4749467 tony bonn
tony bonn's picture

i couldn't give 2 flips if the bildeberger cow cries again.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:16 | 4749501 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Bilderberg.  220, 221, whatever it takes.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:30 | 4749539 Oliver Klozoff
Oliver Klozoff's picture

Wouldja like fries wit dat build yer burger?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:10 | 4749477 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Attention Jim Rickards...Attention Jim have a telephone call.

"The SDR plan would never again see the light of day."

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:13 | 4749491 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

What am i missing? I don't get it.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:23 | 4749518 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

SDR = Special Drawing Rights.  An IMF thing that fell apart shortly after Bretton Woods collapsed.  Still around, as a "basket" or currencies with a lot of weird conditions and stuff attached.

Basically, the precursor to a "one world currency".  It failed in this case, as it will in anything backed by the "west" from here out.  The rest of the world is now barfing up the crap we've been feeding them for decades.  

If you still don't get it, don't worry.  I don't either.  Neither does anyone else.  Even those around the "crying table" barely understood it.


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 06:25 | 4750148 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Oh to be fed the rest of the worlds barf.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:24 | 4749519 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Actually I don't get it. What's the deal here? Merkel cried...yields on PIIG bonds were moving up....Okay... and so Draghi bent the market over his leg and spanked it and now 3 years later we have PIIG yields more than halved. Draghi is now talking the Euro off 1.40 and the dollar back up. I mean sure....maybe it is all juuuust about to fall apart. I guess that risk is always there. But on the flip side it sure as hell seems like these guys have everything exactly how they want it and even managed to prove they can let the air out of a bubble (momo, small cap) when they feel it's necessary while still keeping the indexes at all time highs.

With regards to Rickards, everytime a toaster pops he screams "SDR!" so it was just funny to see that quote.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:39 | 4749563 Charles Nelson ...
Charles Nelson Reilly's picture

You seem to be giving the elites running this shit show quite a bit of credit lately, fonz.

Re: Rickards, his position is very well reasearched and explained in a calm, toned down manner. The IMF has the only clean balance sheet left... Not complicated.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:50 | 4749590 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Someone else made a decent case that Rickards was a bit too good of a salesman for TPTB. I forgot who it was, maybe they will show up.

Charles in all I giving them too much credit or are most of the people on here not giving them enough credit? If you would have taken a poll on here in 2010 and laid out that the CB's would have us where we are, what % would have said it was possible. It's maddening.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:11 | 4749637 Seer
Seer's picture

I'd been saying it for most of the post-crash era now that these folks are NOT stupid.  They really are all trying to figure something out, though, in all certainty, they will fail.  Some might be looking to just escape the big flames (leave office before it all goes), while others have that "if I just believe and work hard enough it can be resolved" thinking.  All are failing to see the "invisible hand" of Mother Nature...

I'm surprised at how well the US has done.  I think that there's plenty of sign of collapse happening elswhere, and this is not all that far from what I'd figured would be the case; though, I figure, if the US went then it would have instant ramifications around the globe, turning the barely-alive into the dead: the reason has to do with the operation of global trade sytems.  If one were to consider that it would have all become one immediate trainwreck w/o the Fed doing what it's done then one could only be amazed at what the Fed has actually managed to do.  None of this is going to matter a lick in the end, but smart folks ought to have seen this as a "grace period" and taken advantage of it (not to "build wealth," but to perserve it the best one can and to start working on what you believe the future is going to be).

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:34 | 4749785 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

Fascinating.  At the fringe there is less structure.  May 16 will Ukraine Gazprom be pre-paid in SDR's, Gold, EUs, USD ?

Great discussion !

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:40 | 4749953 Seer
Seer's picture

Some of the larger players are on edge as well, and I think a lot of attention is staying away from them.  Think Japan: I believe that they can flip quite quickly, and I don't see anyone being in position to save them.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:02 | 4749619 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Their balance sheet is built on other countries balance sheets which are NOT clean.  Optical illusion.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:36 | 4749791 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

Exactly,who gives the IMF most of their fiat ?

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:07 | 4749479 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

Fuck. This.

People: we need to be "governed" like we need fucking holes in our heads.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:50 | 4749592 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

Unfortunately, we've got one and are slated for the other.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 22:35 | 4749683 booboo
booboo's picture

"People: we need to be "governed" like we need fucking holes in our heads."

But in contrast millions of people would gladly let Obama blow his wad on their flaccid face for the priviledge of shaking his hand, and the same people would make the argument after watching a cop blow away a 95 year old women and their government handing out automatic weapons to mexican drug lords and known Islamic wingnuts that the same government should be the only ones trusted with guns. The fact that Angie cried tells me that TPTB will soon run her out of the club and replace her with a more malleable fixture inside the German Democrazy.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:11 | 4749487 TheReplacement
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:55 | 4749608 Proofreder
Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:15 | 4749498 Make_Mine_A_Double
Make_Mine_A_Double's picture

Poor woman....trying to fight off her purse being snatched by a Hungarian dwarf and a Kenyan pick pocket.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:17 | 4749502 Milton Waddams
Milton Waddams's picture

actually she was getting double teamed by Sark and Berls, they were tears of joy

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:22 | 4749515 navy62802
navy62802's picture

Too bad. Now she's causing work for other people.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:26 | 4749521 royal
royal's picture

I don't feel sorry for Merkel; she's not a nationalist, and isn't looking out for Germany's best interest.

Hitler would slap the shit outta this bitch if he were alive today.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:37 | 4749556 gdpetti
gdpetti's picture

Do you think he didn't follow instructions? Remember the same groups financied and supported his movement.... same group that supported Lenin and Trosky.... as the oligarchs in Russia under Yelstin.... as in Ukraine now.... Maybe she is just another sociopath that got fed up with the stress of working with so many psychopaths, and this stress usually shows up on their faces as they live the lie... psychopaths don't have this problem of a conscience, aren't they lucky?

And remember what happened to Hitler? Seems the stress got a hold of him too... it can drive one crazy until suicide seems painless. Remember that song? This madness has been in the works for quite some time and is now coming to a head like a big fat zit.

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 23:11 | 4749742 royal
royal's picture

Hitler wasn't controlled by bankers.

Remember, when the Nazis took control of the German central bank they started issuing debt free money with no interest attached.

If anything, Hitler was the anti-Rothschild, anti-international banker, thus why he got demonized so badly, and still is to this very day.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 00:02 | 4749831 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

yes, yes, you're quite right!

murdering millions of civilians had nothing to do with it, he is only vilified for his economic policies!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 01:41 | 4749956 Seer
Seer's picture

"Maybe she is just another sociopath that got fed up with the stress of working with so many psychopaths,"

That alone deserved an up-arrow.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 02:10 | 4749996 Dublinmick
Dublinmick's picture

Don't know if Der Fuhrer would hit his own daughter

Sun, 05/11/2014 - 21:26 | 4749526 WMM II
WMM II's picture

" Cannes November 3-4, 2011 G-20 summit"


hot off the presses.



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