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And The Biggest Binge-Drinkers In America Are...

Tyler Durden's picture


"Responsibly," Bloomberg surveyed adults aged 26 and older across America and found that almost one-third of D.C. residents report binge-drinking in the last month. Utah, perhaps unsurprisingly, had the lowest binge-drinking percentage at a mere 15% (defined as five or more drinks in one day).



The Bloomberg Methodology

The results were from the National Survey on Drug Use and Health sponsored by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, an Agency of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. They were based on data collected in 2011 and 2012 from approximately 67,500 individuals. Binge alcohol use is defined as drinking five or more drinks on the same occasion on at least one day in the past 30 days.


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Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:52 | 4752438 Rainman
Rainman's picture

Idiotic poll. All raging alcoholics claim only to be binge drinkers . Moar lying from Planet D.C. !!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:54 | 4752446 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:58 | 4752460 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

MAD DOG 20/20 FTW.....BITCHEZ !!!!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:59 | 4752465 StacksOnStacks
StacksOnStacks's picture

Just threw up in my mouth.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:07 | 4752486 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

Then wash that puke out with some Smoker's Phlegm

1 oz. Jagermeister

1 tbs. Mayonnaise floating in the shot

Knock it back and you'll be right as rain !

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:13 | 4752508 Rainman
Rainman's picture

damn .. be sure to make mine chilled.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:34 | 4752554 Manthong
Manthong's picture

When they talk about more transparency in Washington I think they are referring to vodka and Everclear.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:46 | 4752585 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Hopium is clear and grown by CIA approved farmers in the hills of Afghanistan, using green technologies.  Changium, on the other hand,....

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:45 | 4752768 max2205
max2205's picture

B.  U.   R.   P.  

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:30 | 4753094 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

DC claims the title for drunk and stupid.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 07:26 | 4753947 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

from the list it looks like binge drinking is some kind of a Yankee thing.

how you young people drink Jager is totally beyond me.  that is the god-awfulest s*** on planet Earth.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 11:32 | 4755018 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

Dude.....that's what the MAYONNAISE is for !

LOL !!!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:19 | 4752511 knukles
knukles's picture

DC, it is said by those in the recovery business, is estimated to have the highest percentage of the population of any major metropolitan area who are alcoholics.
That's grand news.
Isn't it?

New Infraction:  Governing while intoxicated

God grant me....

Oh, and PS... here's a real life example of "alcoholic" behavior... "We never supported them until we admitted it" by J Kohn

xoxoxoxoxox, tyler

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:27 | 4752536 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

The numbers don't tell the whole story.  For example, in Texas binge drinking means a half liter bottle of Tequila followed by a six pack of Southern Star. All  in 9 minutes.  In Iowa, binge drinking means a jigger of rye in your cup of tea before bed.


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:04 | 4752831 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Exactly! Hell, some of our Baptist friends would say I'm a binge drinker if they see me buy a six pack of beer. I can easily finish that in a night.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 01:10 | 4753670 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

Binge alcohol use is defined as drinking five or more drinks on the same occasion on at least one day in the past 30 days.

Amateurs.  I do twyst more'n that every night.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:08 | 4752647 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture


Bashir said that if the U.S. takes the lead, coordinates all the lethal aid between countries helping Syria, and puts it under the umbrella of the Supreme Military Council, that could give the U.S. government more confidence that any weapons provided to the rebels would be handled responsibly. The council has agreed to establish two central coordination units inside Syria, one in the south and one in the north, Bashir said, but it does not yet have control over the arms flows.


Where have we heard this basic story before...

SMC, ECB, IMF it is all the same shit just different iterations of.



Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:22 | 4752697 Shad_ow
Shad_ow's picture

Lots of celebrating all the looting of others earnings to do there.


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:40 | 4752746 Dave Thomas
Dave Thomas's picture

Hair of the dog: A tumbler full of warm drugstore gin, with a pat of butter floating on it. Garnish with a pubic hair.


Tue, 05/13/2014 - 00:32 | 4753618 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

In spite of the name...

I hope its NOT the dog's pubic hair.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 11:34 | 4755040 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:01 | 4752628 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

Ripple, thank you

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:57 | 4752576 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

5 beers/day is binge drinking? One time in 1 week?


I mean, 12-24/day is binge drinking.

I should know.

I think these surveys are too conservative.

Maybe it's the Methodist Temperance League that does the surveys.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:34 | 4752736 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

Way too conservative. WTF is 5 drinks??? (Pre-dinner?)

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:46 | 4752773 max2205
max2205's picture

Half a liter please

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:48 | 4752955 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

 they make half liter Mason jars?

Yeah, the "G" men, "T" men, the revenuers, too
Searchin' for the place where he made his brew
They were looking, tryin' to book him
But, my pappy kept a-cookin'
White lightnin'

George Jones

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:27 | 4753086 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Is your name Alice Cooper?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:54 | 4752450 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Looks like I need to make a liquor store run.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:45 | 4752574 Manthong
Manthong's picture

5 lousy drinks constitute binge drinking?

Geez, that’s not even an aperitif  in most of the places I’ve been.

(during my younger and more vulnerable years, of course)

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:07 | 4753022 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

Anything that effects serf making timely payments on the interest of their grandparents debts is to be discouraged.

You are property of the corporation and it will decide what is shat and when and how.

Thank you,
The Management.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:58 | 4752615 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Please drop off some Yuengling lager here on your way back.


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:13 | 4752870 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

They don't carry it here in this bass ackwards state.

I did get a fifth of Old Crow Bourbon, aged for 3 years in White Oak barrels.  $7.79.  Maybe I need to buy more expensive stuff to bump my state up?  Nah!

Ah...the Mighty Oak.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:55 | 4752453 rtalcott
rtalcott's picture

No way NM should be that low on the list!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:58 | 4752456 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

North Dakota is drunkest Dakota. Barely.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:28 | 4752537 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I spent a winter up there once. All I remember is the fucking cold and the snow. The rest is a drunken blur.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:48 | 4752590 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

WTF else is there to do during that time of year?

Stock up your fire is all you can do, I do not think they hve ice fishing.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:26 | 4752710 Slave
Slave's picture

Make more North Dakotans.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:06 | 4752837 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Put the neighbors through a wood chipper.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:25 | 4752707 Chief Wonder Bread
Chief Wonder Bread's picture

Along the same lines, why is Alaska in the middle? Should be up near the top. Did they query Native peoples? I don't think so.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:00 | 4752621 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

So, you could DUI in S Dakota, drive over to N Dakota, and escape detention.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:08 | 4752646 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

duped. There is something wrong with this keyboard.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:33 | 4752924 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

You stupid double posting moron.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:33 | 4752926 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

You stupid double posting moron.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 17:58 | 4752458 ShrNfr
ShrNfr's picture

I'll drink to that.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:10 | 4752493 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

Here's to Mag, that filthy hag,
That sleazy, slimy slut.
Green fungus lies between her thighs,
And worms crawl out her butt.
Before I'd scale those scabby legs,
Or suck those pus-filled tits,
I'd drink a gallon of buzzard puke,
And die of the drizzly shits. 

[Hash House Harrier Hymnal(?)]

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:05 | 4752483 geotrader
geotrader's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:05 | 4752625 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Back in the day it was Goldschlager, Bit-Chez!

I must be holding over 100 troy in my liver!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:11 | 4752495 Arthur Two Shed...
Arthur Two Sheds Jackson's picture

I never drank binge.

Sounds a bit tart to me.


quietly sips 5th Glenlivit......

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:15 | 4752514 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


I never drank binge.

Sounds a bit tart to me.

It's similar to swish, with a bit of an emetic aftertaste.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:11 | 4752496 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

Surprised to see Maine so low on the list.  On the other hand, if it never stops, I guess you can't call it a binge.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:03 | 4752634 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

My brother drinks 10 beers/day, but over 18 hours, so that is not considered binge, is it?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:11 | 4752498 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:11 | 4752501 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

I can't believe that the HIGHEST binge drinking count (and by such tepid, teatotalling standards to boot) is only 33%.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:18 | 4752517 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Fuckers are all partying their asses off on $10,000 bottles of wine as they continue to pillage what's left of this country.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:29 | 4752538 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

I bought a $10 bottle and I am going to drink it tonight because this market has made me cry uncle and that is how I handle things.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:35 | 4752551 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

I bought a $10 bottle and I am going to drink it tonight...



I bought a $10 5L box and I am going to drink it tonight...

All fixed.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:15 | 4752675 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

I don't usually drink $10 5L box wine, but when I do, I am crying like a pussy.  Stay shattered my friends.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 22:10 | 4753207 GoldenTool
GoldenTool's picture

Now that's funny

Wed, 05/14/2014 - 17:54 | 4760723 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture


when I do, I am crying like a pussy.  Stay shattered my friends...


I prefer the Oracle's advice, "Here, take a cookie. I promise, by the time you're done eating it, you'll feel right as rain."


But, maybe not. 



Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:39 | 4752556 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

You're getting all high falutin on me Fonz. I'll be drinking a $6 bottle. It was $5 but thanks to that inflation that doesn't exist, since wine is both food and energy, it's moar expensive. So if I drink a bottle of wine and piss it out later is that deflationary?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:41 | 4752568 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

If you drink it and then go piss on a homeless guy's head that homeless guy would actually be a great example of how QE has benefitted the middle class.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:45 | 4752582 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Lol.... Btw it looks like resurger just got 86d by one of the Tylers.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:48 | 4752588 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

really? what for?  By the time we get dow 20k we will all have gone nuts on here and been booted.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:20 | 4752690 zipit
zipit's picture

Trickle down.  Plus, the Broken Windows Theory says that by pissing on that homeless guy, you are creating demand (for doing a load of laundry at the laundromat), and that's good for the economy.  Piss on enough homeless people and we will get that economic recovery afte rall.  Yes we can.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:22 | 4752529 kurt
kurt's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:30 | 4752541 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

In DC alcohol acts as a subconscious distraction for the lackey graduated class from the shame of selling their souls to a criminal cleptocrytpy satanic oligarchy

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:38 | 4752564 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Sorry, I mean Kleptocratic as in Kleptocracy...Hiccup!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:45 | 4752581 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

C'mon, it's stressful living your life as a backstabbing snake among backstabbing snakes.  Cynicism is toxic.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:14 | 4752667 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

That animal farm is really a reptile farm or snake farm specifically. Ickes got it wrong the reptilians are really serpents or snake people and everyone else is snake food who isn't one not including smaller snakes.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:00 | 4752821 knukles
knukles's picture

The Bible (as well as other older religious texts) and ancient artifacts/arts depict the reptiles and snakes as literally one and the same.
Now, if we were sitting around on our asses all day jawing about ZH like crap back oh say, 6,000 BC watching the pyramids being built by these scaly fuckers with flying machines, we'd probably be wondering about snakes and lizards, too, when we tried to explain this to our kids or drew pictures of them.

I mean, if that kinda shit was taking place we'd be nonplussed about somebody's missing birth certificate, wouldn't we?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:53 | 4752985 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

I meant metaphorically speaking though I wouldn't rule out that possibility either. Most everything I was told to believe blindly and when asked told to shut up and stop being a wiseass has slowly over time been proven to be a deception if not outright lie.

I know enough to know just how little I do know in a lot of cases but systems tend have very simple repeatable rules/truths that iterate constantly throughout no matter how complex the iterations get and aliens helping along the evolution process genetically certainly is possible.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:32 | 4753051 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

My father is/was fascinated with the author Erich von Däniken. I used to look at the photos in all those von Däniken books as a kid and think crickey...lizard spacemen. Then, I sort of grew up accepting the distinct possibility of lizard spacemen. The evidence is strong.

It's a lot easier to accept extra terrestrials if you are prepared for them, whether real or fabricated by gov ops.

If you're not perpared, you won't be able to think straight if confronted with a new paradigm. If you're used to the concept, you can use your brainpower to plan instinctively what to do, instead of working out how to fight or flight or freeze or calculate how those Nazi flying spinning rotation devices work :)

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 00:42 | 4753640 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Lizard people = Bernanke & Yellen.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 18:56 | 4752607 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Being hammered on the job as an elected official is par for the course.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:09 | 4752651 Its_the_economy...
Its_the_economy_stupid's picture

five or more in one day.......


is just getting started!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:09 | 4752653 Alberich
Alberich's picture

Five "drinks"? What the hell kind of unit of measurement is that?

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:22 | 4752696 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

Fuck you'd have to be a binge drinker to live around those fucking clowns although i'm sure there's plenty of biden-types in those figures.

Actually i'm trying to think of the republican house leader not biden can't recall his name all I can visualize are his narrow glazed over eyes.  Fuck 'em all.  I got one name for all of them so it doesn't really matter.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:29 | 4752724 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

I'd consider binge to be from Tuesday afternoon to Monday evening.

Weekend drinkers are sissies.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:33 | 4752731 supersajin
supersajin's picture

I live in DC, work non gov related.  This is B.S. I don't see this AT ALL!!  Coke YES!! Drinking NO!!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 19:50 | 4752786 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

"almost one-third of D.C. residents report binge-drinking in the last month"...

Can we have the largest ever "#" of car fatalities in Washington D.C. to go with that ranking for "binge-drinking"?  

Someone come up with a plan lickety-split to kill off all the DOS/CIA/FBI/NSA, Congress and their aids and lobbysists with drunk drivers!

No time like the present!!!

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:13 | 4752873 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Somewhere in the world, its 5:00 PM

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:22 | 4752904 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

"...defined as five or more drinks in one day..."


Sounds like Romney's crew came up with that absurdly low level....5 or more quarts of Everclear in 1 week would be more like it.


Having been born, raised, and started my drinking in D.C. I will say that it appears nothing has changed in 60 years......everyone (and I mean everyone) drank a lot.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 22:13 | 4753218 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

.....and they have Alaska about in the middle of the chart?????

The only place I saw more drinking than D.C. was the summer spent working in Alaska....those folks were pro's

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 20:40 | 4752949 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

Finally - a reasonable answer to explain government statistics - and why the Fed keeps doing QE...

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:01 | 4753006 Curt W
Curt W's picture

22 years in Salt Lake City, I would say it is more than 15%, they just will never admit it.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:03 | 4753013 g'kar
g'kar's picture

I don't binge, I'm full time.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 21:18 | 4753064 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

Being from Boston, and Irish, binge drinking is mainly a 8 year old and younger problem. After 8 we dont stop drinking.. Since there is no no-binge part, hence low binge rates.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 23:18 | 4753119 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture


Mon, 05/12/2014 - 22:18 | 4753232 BeerMe
BeerMe's picture

Time to hit the fridge again.

Mon, 05/12/2014 - 22:35 | 4753288 robnume
robnume's picture

In 2009 my son and I were on a road trip fom California, where we live, to relatives all over the USSA and when we were driving from NC to NJ, having to go through DC, OMG, I saw more obviously drunk driving in DC than in any other major metro area I've been through and I'm a world traveler! Really, I've never been so frightened in my life, driving through Washington DC at about 9:30 PM. Five years later, we still muse on this, my son and I. It was the most harrowing, white knuckled drive I've experienced. All around us people were making moving violations I didn't even know were physically possible. We both wondered - where the fucking highway patrol was and did they know what the fuck was going on out on their highways? Well, apparently they do know and that's probably why we saw no highway patrol; they're just as fucking scared out there as we were. It's tough when there's NO safe lane anywhere because every single fucking lane had at least one majorly drunk fucker at the wheel. Since that road trip through hell my son and I got to see at least part of the reason that people inside the beltway are so out of touch with the rest of the country. THEY'RE ALL FUCKIN' ALKIES AND THEY'RE DRIVING DRUNK EVERY NIGHT!! It was indeed a weeknight (work the next day) so we can use our imaginations as to what the weekend driving conditions must be.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 00:49 | 4753656 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Official DC congresscriter comment...


Tue, 05/13/2014 - 00:51 | 4753658 q99x2
q99x2's picture

None of the Q99X2 drink alcohol. We have a problem with spontaneous combustion.

Tue, 05/13/2014 - 13:43 | 4755653 mkhs
mkhs's picture

West Virginia is so low?  I guess meth was not part of the survey.

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