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Caption Contest: "Do I Look Like I'm Happy To See You" Edition

Tyler Durden's picture


"Smile, we're on camera..."



h/t @dougmillsnyt


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Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:25 | 4941005 Slave
Slave's picture

Maybe Perry IS gay.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:29 | 4941015 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Perry: "You look familiar. Have I seen you somewhere before?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:32 | 4941029 wallstreetapost...
wallstreetaposteriori's picture

but I forget the name of the "branch" you work in....

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:41 | 4941068 12ToothAssassin
12ToothAssassin's picture

"Any good mexican restaurants around here?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:55 | 4941110 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Remember that MOAB we dropped on your fertilizer plant Lil Ricky?

Ok, now let's see that smile.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:57 | 4941115 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Am I supposed to know who these people are?


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:33 | 4941205 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

One is that Kenyan guy and the other is from Northern Mexico but I forget their names. Blessed Alzheimer's.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:13 | 4941514 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

O: Hey, Chris!  Thanks for stumping for me in 2012.  How's life after Jersey Shore.
P: It's Rick.   And you're in Texas, Hadji.
O: Yeah yeah.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 22:04 | 4941850 Newsboy
Newsboy's picture

Yeah Rick, Preparation-H is the stuff. I use it every day. Make sure to spread it way up in there. You'll feel better in the morning.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 23:30 | 4942132 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

Who am I and what am I doing here?!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:54 | 4941253 rwe2late
rwe2late's picture

They are both video-game fanatics.

The one on the right

is the undisputed though unofficial champion of Call of Duty -Black Ops Drones.

The other one is honored for promoting video-gaming in Texas , though he is mostly known for having been a Democrat for Al Gore  before becoming a Republican against "evolution theory".


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:02 | 4941276 Poundsand
Poundsand's picture

BO:  "Don't look so glum Rick, you won't have to be my bitch forever.  Now, where can we go to get in a quick 9?"

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 06:42 | 4942526 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

BO:  "Now, where can we go to get in a quick 9?"


BO:  "Now, where can we go to get in a quick 69?"



Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:56 | 4941111 linniepar
linniepar's picture

Come to my ranch, for a friendly game of cat and mouse...

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:30 | 4941197 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

After that we can play toss the donut and hide the sausage.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:57 | 4941454 max2205
max2205's picture

It's okey, I am here to help you......

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:20 | 4941536 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Top 10 Horror Movie Masks (8:29)

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 00:56 | 4942299 12ToothAssassin
12ToothAssassin's picture

"Lets go hunting with Cheyney"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:17 | 4941528 dogfish
dogfish's picture

No one has to know we have the same agenda.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:32 | 4941206 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

"Barry? You ever had a Texas asswhippin??"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:00 | 4941130 villainvomit
villainvomit's picture

 BO:  Nice to see you, Rick.  You know your still my bitch, right ?

RP:  Not nice to see you jackass, but your in the Republic of Texas and if you don't shut it, I will beat you about the head with my Eastwing.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 23:29 | 4942129 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:00 | 4941131 villainvomit
villainvomit's picture

 BO:  Nice to see you, Rick.  You know your still my bitch, right ?

RP:  Not nice to see you jackass, but your in the Republic of Texas and if you don't shut it, I will beat you about the head with my Eastwing.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 23:31 | 4942136 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

now it seems wrong to pick on you, what with the wind blowing the other way in the field of red and green.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:30 | 4941187 OceanX
OceanX's picture


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:25 | 4941007 JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

Behold the scam in full flower- best friends ever.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:26 | 4941009 yrad
yrad's picture

"Heya Rick, you been working out?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:34 | 4941042 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

Let me fix it a bit.

"Heya Chris, you been working out?  Or is that your gastric bypass?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:36 | 4941050 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Obozo:  "I'm sure your tax returns are all in order... but, a little heads up, ol' Rick Baby... my IRS will probably be wanting to give them a little lookie-see."

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:58 | 4941123 Slave
Slave's picture

Sorry bro, but Perry's a neocon. He's safe.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:27 | 4941013 PSEUDOLOGOI

Let's head over to the border, shall we??

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:29 | 4941016 yellencrash
yellencrash's picture

I wish he'd put that horse head back on.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:29 | 4941017 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

You're a handsome man Rick. Thanks Mr President, is Reggie along? I know a place

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:30 | 4941020 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

i'm wondering how many times perry will have his hand sanitized, to get the grime off

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:56 | 4941108 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

And have the suit jacket cleaned.

That hand on the shoulder says "The Justice Department is mine, homey."

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:31 | 4941022 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

You're going to be impeached Mr.Obama. Thanks for the photo PR effort in shaking my hand.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:32 | 4941026 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

Once we get all of the attention off of these new American citizens, I will be able to have more flexibility....

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:32 | 4941028 Boozer
Boozer's picture

Where have those paws been?  Gross.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:33 | 4941030 Cruel Aid
Cruel Aid's picture


No comment

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:32 | 4941031 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Rick, I have to admit I have a little boner meeting you.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:32 | 4941034 Dragon HAwk
Dragon HAwk's picture

Dude.. About that 5 Bucks I Owe you...

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:34 | 4941037 wattie
wattie's picture

Did you buy that "CYNK Technology Corp" I told you about ;-)

"course I did" :-)

Cheers Wattie

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:34 | 4941038 Racer
Racer's picture

Thinks : Take your f*cking hand off my shoulder before I smack you one

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:35 | 4941211 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:34 | 4941041 gcjohns1971
gcjohns1971's picture

"Feel that, Rick?  Get used to feeling my hands on your back."

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:35 | 4941043 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Rick, this is going to be great for Texas. All these new little freeloaders are bound to vote for me in my 7th term. I'll remember you if you're not dead

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:35 | 4941045 Nevsky
Nevsky's picture

Still stoned from yesterday's Denver visit, huh?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:36 | 4941047 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Except Perry refused to shake his hand unless I am missing something here.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:04 | 4941119 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Yep not missing anything here.

We shall see if Ricky has any real balls to call out the shit stirrer on this on. I wouldn't hold my breath though.


Thu, 07/10/2014 - 01:40 | 4942366 Richardk888
Richardk888's picture

Perry is a globalist and a sell out to big business.

You cant believe anything that comes out of his cock sucking mouth.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:36 | 4941049 NOZZLE
NOZZLE's picture

What's the worst that could happen to Perry, a trial in the local Federal court with one hung jury after another until 2017? We would have busted you out of prison anyway or Falujazdized every federal puke in site. It would be worth it, same goes for that Bloe The Plumber moron, you could have saved the nation a lot of pain, you had the chance.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:37 | 4941052 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

A two-year U.S. Senator from Chicago with absoutely 'No Executive Management Skills', awe?, with butT a bag of hope and change , this fluff-duster!!!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:41 | 4941064 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

No better way to portray innocence that through ignorance?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:39 | 4941058 ncdirtdigger
ncdirtdigger's picture

"Say Rick, you like getting that Federal money every month , right? Well than , STFU and smile for the camera because you wouldn't want me to squeeze your little boy balls now would you?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:39 | 4941060 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

you have a wetback problem, did it rain?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:40 | 4941061 stant
stant's picture

I told you no convertibles and I am not going to dallas

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:12 | 4941165 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

To which Rick replies I knew Jack Kennedy and you sir are not Jack Kennedy.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:13 | 4941167 ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

Where's Poppy when you need him?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:43 | 4941075 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

At least they used the right color hand this time around.....

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:44 | 4941076 Mox E
Mox E's picture

Everything IS bigger in Texas.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:49 | 4941088 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

  Perry's thinking, " I wish I could throw a steaming hot noose over the tail rotor of Marine1 and hang your worthless ass."

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:55 | 4941093 22winmag
22winmag's picture

"I'll have more flexibility after the erection."

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:54 | 4941096 BeetleBailey
BeetleBailey's picture


...meeting Mr. I can'tscrewupanythingcausethisisTEXASmotherfucker!

All fake...

Here's what was uttered....

"Fuck You Asshole"

"Your Momma Motherfucker"

"Eat shit and die, smile for the god damned cameras"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:53 | 4941097 Watts_D_Matter
Watts_D_Matter's picture

Hey Rick, Hope you don't mind if I wipe a bit of Kenyan jizz on your shoulder!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 17:55 | 4941107 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Two of the biggest Big Gov Fags on the planet

-a Texan

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:00 | 4941132 kraschenbern
kraschenbern's picture

(Two of) The three biggest lies:

1.  Great to see ya!

2.  Great to be here!

3.  ....

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:03 | 4941138 El Gordo
El Gordo's picture

African-American meets Agro-American.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:04 | 4941142 El Gordo
El Gordo's picture

African-American meets Agro-American (can't call them Aggies any more you know, PC and all).

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:08 | 4941145 Pee Wee
Pee Wee's picture

First stop on today's tour is a ride through Daly Plaza in the limo convertable, Mr President.   The secret service will show you to your seat.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:08 | 4941153 SmittyinLA
SmittyinLA's picture

When I put my glasses on I look smarter


Rick Perry is a bigger empty suit than the drunken governor of Arizona 

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:08 | 4941156 logicalman
logicalman's picture

All us pols are in this together, if Joe Public ever figures that out were fucked, so at least try to make this look good.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:19 | 4941174 are we there yet
are we there yet's picture

I have noticed over the years that Obama keeps getting lighter, like Michael Jackson kept getting lighter. Only, Michael Jackson was born in the US.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:27 | 4941188 homiegot
homiegot's picture

It's nauseating really.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:32 | 4941204 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Heya Rick! Hey how much ya bench? I can curl 2 pounds now!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:37 | 4941219 Moe Howard
Moe Howard's picture

Fuck 'em both. Figuratively.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 18:40 | 4941222 booboo
booboo's picture

Debate moderator: "Gov. Perry, you said if elected you would cut several Federal level Departments, which ones?"

Gov. Perry: "Uhhh, uhhhh, uh the department of...uhhh, uhhhh, well, yes, but I can't talk now I have a banker cock in my mouth"

You do all know that this will be the republicrat nominee don't ya? So, tell me again why you vote?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:06 | 4941289 Pumpkin
Pumpkin's picture

'Hail Lucifer'

If Perry was the real deal, Obama wouldn't set foot in Texas.  Fucking whores!  Both of them!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:07 | 4941294 Smiley
Smiley's picture

Perry looks like he threw up in his mouth.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:14 | 4941325 Baby Eating Dingo22
Baby Eating Dingo22's picture

You look much more orange in person


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:30 | 4941377 NoPantsSpongeBob
NoPantsSpongeBob's picture

Obama: "You look funny with this tough look on your face, Rick. "

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:58 | 4941461 nostromo17
nostromo17's picture

Soon to be 'Rick Perry Who?' and always to be not much more than the first black President.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 19:58 | 4941462 herriage
herriage's picture

One's a socialist traitor and ones an egomaniacal dipshit. Sounds like the FUCKING PERFECT TEAM to figure all this borda stuff out. Oh, Fuck Yeahhhhhhh

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:02 | 4941478 agNau
agNau's picture

"There's three things you're going to do immediately.
One, lockdown the border.
Two, send me a railcar full of NIX, these lice are killing me!
Three, and I need..uh....yea three, I what was that third thing?"

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:16 | 4941507 The Blank Stare
The Blank Stare's picture

Hey Ricky, let's look up together so we can get a dronie.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:12 | 4941511 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Freddy Krueger's Best Quotes Part 1 (6:32)

Freddy Krueger's Best Quotes Part 2 (7:19)

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 20:18 | 4941533 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

Breaking Bad meets the Boss.


Wed, 07/09/2014 - 21:05 | 4941656 Irving Phelps
Irving Phelps's picture

My blue and white Johnson is bigger than yours.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 21:14 | 4941677 sleigher
sleigher's picture

Remember what Cheney did to Whittington down here in Texas?

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 21:20 | 4941693 Robert of Ottawa
Robert of Ottawa's picture

I disagree with the general cynicism on this post. I think the photo says it all.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 21:46 | 4941778 Rock On Roger
Rock On Roger's picture

Yah but you're a foreigner and a wanker

Especially if you're from Ottawa.

Only liars, thieves, and wankers

Claim they're from Ottawa.

Go pull harper's pud.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 21:50 | 4941793 Irving Phelps
Irving Phelps's picture

I'm smilin' cause I just tapped Nancy Pelosi in Air Force One. I think I'm itchin' already.... Rick, my man, can you step in?....I think she's ready for round two and I'm hanging a major limp one!

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 22:58 | 4942036 Dublinmick
Dublinmick's picture

Ricky you got some beef on that shoulder, you a man.

Wed, 07/09/2014 - 23:56 | 4942207 Stan522
Stan522's picture

Get you FUCKING hand off of my shoulder you lying sack of shit POTUS......

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 07:31 | 4942598 spjk2k
spjk2k's picture

bo:  i'm starved.  where can i get some good mexican?

rp:  few miles away,  by the book depository.

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 09:11 | 4942826 Mabussur
Mabussur's picture

Kent, Clark Kent.

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 09:25 | 4942902 Rear Admiral Obvious
Rear Admiral Obvious's picture

Rick! I am glad you decided to make it, thought you might not show 

Thu, 07/10/2014 - 10:04 | 4943050 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

"Hi! My name is SHIT...have a handful."

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