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CDC Issues Level 3 Travel Alert As 'Largest Ebola Outbreak In History' Spreads

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Things appear to be going from worse to worst as the deadly Ebola epidemic surges on. The CDC has issued a Level 3 - Avoid All Non-Essential Travel - warning.

 

 

CDC urges all US residents to avoid nonessential travel to Liberia, Guinea, and Sierra Leone because of an unprecedented outbreak of Ebola.

An outbreak of Ebola has been ongoing in Liberia since March 2014.

 

 

This outbreak also affects Sierra Leone and Guinea; to date more than 1320 cases have occurred in the three countries and more than 725 people have died, making this the largest outbreak of Ebola in history.

 

At least three Americans have been infected; two are health care workers in an Ebola clinic. Affected districts include Bomi, Bong, Grand Gedeh, Lofa, Montserrado (including the capital city of Monrovia), Margibi, and Nimba.

 

Instances of civil unrest and violence against aid workers have been reported in West Africa as a result of the outbreak.

 

The public health infrastructure is being severely strained as the outbreak grows.

 

CDC to send additional 50 experts to region in next 30 days.

 

Dr. Thomas Frieden, director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said Thursday that even in a best-case scenario, it could easily take three to six months to stem the epidemic in West Africa.

Do not worry though, as the US reassures there is no risk...

  • *WHITE HOUSE SAYS `NO INDICATION' OF EBOLA RISK TO U.S.
 

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Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028407 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

*WHITE HOUSE SAYS `NO INDICATION' OF EBOLA RISK TO U.S.

*TIM GEITHNER `NO RISK' OF DOWNGRADE TO U.S. AAA

 

The CDC is going to get fined $5,000,000,000, just watch.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:42 | 5028426 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

the  _____________ is "contained" and there is no danger to __________ as any and all contagion has been "ring fenced".

 

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:45 | 5028441 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

The CDC has issued a Level 3 - Avoid All Non-Essential Travel - warning.

 

If I am living in any of these areas of outbreak it is ESSENTIAL for me to get the hell out...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:47 | 5028446 General Decline
General Decline's picture

I'll be adding powdered pool shock to my bug out gear

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:58 | 5028526 Four chan
Four chan's picture

the nih on national news last night admitted the returning religious nuts "helping" africa will not be tracked in the very least so come on home infected. sounds alot like our southern border policy with similar results im sure.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:58 | 5028537 Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Tapering is not tightening

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:59 | 5028549 Comte de Saint ...
Comte de Saint Germain's picture

Regardless of how Ebola arrives to the US, the incurable disease will exterminate at least 200+ million Americans: the majority of people living in the United States are extremely addicted and dependent on prescribed medications, over-the-counter medicines and synthetic vitamins, thus their immune systems are weaker and unable to fight any disease naturally. Senior citizens, the disabled and baby boomers who happen to be the majority in this country (as a population group) will be the first casualties of Ebola.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:06 | 5028585 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Fuck you asshole.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:15 | 5028643 pods
pods's picture

Bold letters made me believe it. Didn't work for you?

pods

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:18 | 5028670 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Well in that case it should be

FUCK YOU AGAIN ASSHOLE WITH AN EBOLA INFECTED CHAINSAW!

Is that moar believable now??

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:30 | 5029237 90's Child
90's Child's picture

Only 200m?

Still a few more we could spare to lose.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:05 | 5029406 BaBaBouy
BaBaBouy's picture

""Up To 20 DAY Incubation Period""...

Soo...

If He Comes In To USA Fine, No Symptoms, He Can Start Spreading The Virus Unbeknownced To Anyone, And Then BOOM!!!

Yeah, Absolutely NO USA Risk...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:47 | 5029601 Blues Traveler
Blues Traveler's picture

Oblunder's final solution

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 19:35 | 5030081 Bad Attitude
Bad Attitude's picture

Maybe this is what Dear Leader meant when he was discussing "fundamentally transforming the United States of America."

Forward (over the cliff)!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:01 | 5029409 CheapBastard
CheapBastard's picture

"It's only a tiny leak," the PM of Japan annoounced to his peeples ....

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 18:29 | 5029803 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

At least 1 of the 2 ebola Americans that are being flown to the U.S. will be at Emory University Hospital. It kind of sounds like Emory is not to happy about it "Emory University Hospital officials said they have been informed that there are plans to transfer a patient with the Ebola virus infection to a special containment unit at their facility." I'm not too happy about it either. To me this is full retard, putting 320 million people at risk so that 2 people , in the words of a Fox news anchor "can be with their families." I say fuck that shit.

http://www.wsbtv.com/news/news/local/ebola-outbreak-worsens-cdc-issues-l...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:16 | 5028649 XitSam
XitSam's picture

To the Bat Bunker!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:16 | 5028655 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

It's not incurable

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:35 | 5028809 pods
pods's picture

Half the reason why these diseases even come about is due to malnutrition. 

Why is it that all these diseases always thrive in the third world?  

And don't get me started on AIDS. If Amerika used the same criteria for diagnosing AIDS as is used in Africa anyone that has recently eaten at Taco Bell has AIDS.  Toss in some AZT poisoning and voila!

pods

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 18:43 | 5029868 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

But it's all natural, wild caught, sustainably hunted free range low fat organic fruit bat they're eating.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 20:16 | 5030291 Cruel Aid
Cruel Aid's picture

Bet the american dr was well nourished. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 22:55 | 5031050 pods
pods's picture

Probably by american standards.

Which means he is more than likely severely nutrient deficient.  

Sure, it can infect and kill truly healthy people, but there is a reason why these diseases proliferate in third world areas.

pods

Fri, 08/01/2014 - 00:00 | 5031228 Cruel Aid
Cruel Aid's picture

absolutely wrt the 3rd world areas, I watched the liberia you tube video that someone here posted. God awful.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:57 | 5028976 KnightTakesKing
KnightTakesKing's picture

It has a 90% fatality rate. And your point is...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:36 | 5029274 Uber Vandal
Uber Vandal's picture

The frightening part, is if one is among the 10% to survive, or in some case 30% depending on treatment, and luck, is this gem from the World Health Organization:

Men who have recovered from the disease can still transmit the virus through their semen for up to 7 weeks after recovery from illness.

This could indeed be a gift that keeps on giving.

Fri, 08/01/2014 - 10:25 | 5032413 Notsobadwlad
Notsobadwlad's picture

That is the thing with viruses. You can have them inactive in you for a long, long, long time and they can be transmitted via sexual fluids. Also, supposedly they are too small for condoms to stop.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 20:59 | 5030540 nc551
nc551's picture

?? The current outbreak has a mortality rate of about 55%, did you just come from CNN?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 23:46 | 5031190 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

removed

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:18 | 5028673 Groundhog Day
Groundhog Day's picture

So your sayin i should short all mega retailers like WMT, TGT and COST....ok then

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 19:10 | 5029957 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Hmmm.  I think they are saying STWFP.

  Short The Whole Fucking Planet;)

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:25 | 5028716 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

On the plus side housing should crash to zero in your rosy scenario.

Oh, and just about every other sector too.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:27 | 5028741 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

@Comte: As a boomer, I'm in full agreement with you.

"A man that would tell the truth, should have one foot in the stirrup".......Old Russian Proverb

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:54 | 5029636 Monty Burns
Monty Burns's picture

You need to take some prescribed meds yourself to cure your delusions.  In can be done. Take heart.

Fri, 08/01/2014 - 00:52 | 5031335 AGuy
AGuy's picture

Too early to tell,but it appears the disease kills in the 40-51 age group, sparing retirees!

http://wwwnc.cdc.gov/eid/article/16/7/09-1525_article

 "overall attack rate in the district was 43 cases/100,000 population. The highest rate occurred in Kasitu subcounty, followed by the rate in Bundibugyo town council (within Bundibugyo district (Table 2). By sex, the attack rate for men was higher than that for women (64 vs. 47/100,000 population). By age group, the attack rate was higher for persons 41–50 years of age than for persons 51–60 years of age (146 vs. 122/100,000 population)."

"Senior citizens, the disabled and baby boomers who happen to be the majority in this country (as a population group) will be the first casualties of Ebola."

I think the young are usually most vulnerable to infections diseases. Generally younger people believe they are invulnerable and take less precautions than older and the elderly. The retiree also don't need to to work and can better isolate themselves from the public. 

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:58 | 5028539 Pinto Currency
Pinto Currency's picture

 

 

Bernanke also said there had never been a nation-wide decline in housing prices - although housing prices did decline across the country during the 1930s depression.

But Bernanke doesn't know much about the Depression.

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:19 | 5028678 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

Bernanke's dissertation was on the Great Depression. This is NOT an argument that he is an expert on the Great Depression, just thought this added to the context.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:27 | 5028733 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

Edit: deleted

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:47 | 5028907 agstacks
agstacks's picture

And Obama was a Consitutional professor.  What's your point?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:07 | 5029052 knukles
knukles's picture

He is not a "professor" and there is no evidence that he ever "studied" the constitution.
In fact he surrendered his legal license in the state of Illinois which is only done to stop disbarment

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:21 | 5029175 Pinto Currency
Pinto Currency's picture

 

 

He did profess to know something about the constitution.

I guess I'm hatin' now.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:54 | 5029381 Town Crier
Town Crier's picture

I think his title was Senior Lecturer.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:18 | 5029145 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

Duality

Irony

"Higher" Education

Shall I continue?

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:03 | 5028561 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

I'll be skipping church for a while.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:21 | 5028694 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Avoid the Ebola water.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:03 | 5028565 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture

 

 

Someone is going to jump on a plane with this shit and then we're really gonna see how good we are at modern medicine.

 

Until then, shelter in place comrades!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:15 | 5028651 pods
pods's picture

Where's that chick that makes $15k a month working from home?

pods

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:21 | 5028693 fuu
fuu's picture

She comes in contact with lots of bodily fluids though, not the best careeer choice right now.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:24 | 5028719 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture

 

 

She should be just fine holed up there in her basement with her nude chat cam business.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:07 | 5029059 knukles
knukles's picture

Should see biz pick up

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:08 | 5028603 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

CDC to send additional 50 experts to region in next 30 day

 

thats great, thats 50 more ppl to get infected and then to return back to their home countries in order to spread the virus there...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:26 | 5028725 balanced
balanced's picture

And as we all know, once it gets into the U.S...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYzPYhiK__Q

/sarc ...?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:06 | 5028771 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

I would be more worried about 1) those already over there (300+ Peace CORPSEmen being returned, not sure about the two CORPSEmen presently in quarantine) or 2) already those already back from there who might come down deadly explosive vomit or diarrhea at any moment.

The 725 deaths is a couple days old, so add 30 per day since the 29th...

In the mean time, I read "bitter-kola not a cure for ebola virus"...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 20:18 | 5030304 BringOnTheAsteroid
BringOnTheAsteroid's picture

Only this universe we inhabit would surely be capable of such irony as the "returning religious nuts" being responsible for bringing ebola to the shores of the US. OH THE FUCKING IRONY. It's about time these arrogant fucks minded their own business and maybe concentrated on improving the morals of their congressmen and woman and leaving the hell alone people from other cultures.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:59 | 5028535 Pinto Currency
Pinto Currency's picture

/

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:52 | 5028484 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

"CDC urges all US residents to avoid nonessential travel'

this is a great opportunity to stay indoors and work from home.

the rising number of high-paying knowledge-based jobs for people with informatics know-how and a college degree has Never Been Higher.

hugs,
university of phoenix 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:09 | 5028609 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

I'm a Phonics.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:17 | 5028666 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

Ebola is Ebonics for the shit has hit the fan

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:29 | 5028754 duo
duo's picture

This is how Obama puts us under martial law.

Remember, Cambridge University shut down for 6 months when the plague hit England back in Newton's day.

"Escape the Ebola virus, show up at your nearest disease-free FEMA camp."

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:57 | 5028977 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

The great fire of london did finally erradicate the plague.

Has DC had a great fire yet ?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:10 | 5029458 sleepingbeauty
sleepingbeauty's picture

Not recently,  just when the Canadians (British living in Canada) burned the white house down.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 20:20 | 5030323 Cruel Aid
Cruel Aid's picture

metaphorical fire been burning for a while

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 18:10 | 5029708 Uber Vandal
Uber Vandal's picture

You know you are REALLY having a bad day when the camp names are Silent Hill, Raccoon City, Terminus, and Arcadia.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:51 | 5029362 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

There is a chick here that makes crazy money working from he on the web. It is so easy! Just talk to her...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:56 | 5028978 mt paul
mt paul's picture

LA gang bangers

with ebola....

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:54 | 5028501 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Sudden Debt says that it is just propaganda to distract us from more important topics.

 

Do not concern yourselves. He knows best.

 

Pay attention to the European Central Bank woes, the Argentine Default, the Portugal Espirito Santo Bank Meltdown...

 

And by all means pay attention to the House of Representative's Lawsuit against Obama because these are life and death issues.

 

Sudden Debt is wise.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:50 | 5029358 F0ster
F0ster's picture

Langley: "How do we get these damn Chinese off our African natural resources?"

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028428 cifo
cifo's picture

Boring "news". More people are killed every day in ME.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:50 | 5028464 cossack55
cossack55's picture

True, but "normally" the ME can't land at O'hare or DFW.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:55 | 5028521 taketheredpill
taketheredpill's picture

 

 

Or Manhattan.

 

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:09 | 5028602 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Oh fuck!   Maine now too!?

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:53 | 5028494 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

As I have said before, the chances of any given (named) outbreak becoming a global pandemic are pretty small.  The chances that one will eventually come along and beat the odds are not so small.  Do something that has a 1% chance of getting you killed every time you do it every single day and chances are that you'll not survive a year.  Yet it will be hard to predict just what day you are going to die, because 1% isn't a huge probability. 

 

It's why every time something like this comes up, if you ask me point blank if I think it's going to become a global pandemic, I'm going to bluntly answer "nope."  I'll mostly be right.  It's the one time that I'm wrong that'll get you though.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:06 | 5028544 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Sudden Debt made me see the error in my ways this morning. There is nothing to concern yourself with as it is all just a propaganda ploy. We should really be concentrating on the killing of Palestinians over in Gaza. Hell that might come into JFK Airport next.

 

We need to be concerned with the Ukraine shooting down our jets flying over in Europe.

 

There is no risk whatsoever. It is propaganda.

 

Of course there is no need to concern yourselves whatsoever with the EXPONENTIAL GROWTH of the Cases. None whatsoever. That Math stuff is for geeks and those high brow Scientists. We all know that they are clueless when that deals with anything real.

 

My thanks to Sudden Debt.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:09 | 5028607 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

I think that people fail to understand risk.  People freak the fuck out over little things and fail to see the big things until they get smacked right between the eyes with them.  I'm not going to do more than keeping an eye on the ebola stories until it does start becoming a global pandemic.  That's when I'll start to worry.  There's not much else that can be done anyway.  Viruses and bacteria are funny that way.  Do I think ebola is going to be a global pandemic?  No.  Will I be surprised if I am wrong?  No.  With over 7 billion people on the planet, there are an awful lot of chances for some super bug to appear and fuck us up.

 

That being said, I am not going to Africa anytime soon.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 20:32 | 5030390 BringOnTheAsteroid
BringOnTheAsteroid's picture

There is a 100% chance that a super bug will appear, let's get this point straight. By definition a superbug is simply a bacteria or virus that has circumvented our abaility to combat it with our antibiotics and antiviral drugs. The incredible rate of reproduction of bacteria and the adaptive power of evolution ensures, as night follows day, that such bacteria or virus will emerge.

Let me provide a brief lesson for all those people who think evolution by natural selection is anything but fact. Consider the world a petri dish. Inside that petri dish is a cocktail of antibiotic drugs. Also inside that petri dish are trillions upon trillions of bacteria. Only one of those trillions upon trillions of bacetria need, by pure chance or random mutation, develop characteristics that give that one cell a 0.0000001% greater chance of survival. Given enough time the characteristics displayed in that first cell now inhabit a large portion of the population as they have outbred the rest. Now the antibiotics aren't quite as effective. Repeat this cycle billions of times and you will "naturally" select only super bugs for survival. It is a beautiful system, so simple but so radically powerful and effective.

Hands down one of the greatest scientific insights in human history. 

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:00 | 5028550 ForWhomTheTollBuilds
ForWhomTheTollBuilds's picture

I'm just wondering what happened to the family of that woman who busted out of a hospital after being diagnosed with Ebola.  ZH ran the story about her dying in an ambulance (after being "caught" I guess).

 

But what is the appropriate criminal charge for her family members (and her were she still alive) here? "Attempted murder of 6 billion people"?

 

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:35 | 5028803 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

And what about those who refuse an "order" to report to their local FEMA camp, or who get broken out?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:55 | 5029389 EastCoast90
EastCoast90's picture

They Will be eliminated for non compliance by a commissioned tactical team courtsey of the U.S Government. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:56 | 5029390 EastCoast90
EastCoast90's picture

They Will be eliminated for non compliance by a commissioned tactical team courtsey of the U.S Government. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:11 | 5028620 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

It's the one time that I'm wrong that'll get you though.

The whole idea of Ebola tends to make one feel a rather helpless.  

Not sure if that's a good thing or bad thing at this point -- probably a little bit of both.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:23 | 5028710 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

I get your point but I think a statistician will disagree with you.  Each individual case it is still only a 1 percent chance.  You can't add them together.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:31 | 5028773 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

That was my point. The probability that you'll survive any one "event" is 99%. The probability that you'll survive 365 "events" in a row is .99365 or 2.55%. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:40 | 5028850 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

Take a look at hospital HEPA filter design, the size range of the ebola virus, and Brownian motion (I hope the math wizzes who did the those calculations were better at identifying external variables than the bankers who used to work for me).

It's all a calculated odds game, whether the serfs want it to be or not.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:48 | 5028909 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

It's also all an odds game whether the oligarchs want it to be or not.  The thing that being rich gets you is better medical care and the ability to better isolate yourself, i.e. to increase your odds.  It does not make you outright immune. 

 

Interestingly enough, the oligarchs of the dark and middle ages lost some of their power because of the black death, even though they retreated to their country estates and weren't exposed to the plague.  When the plague had run its course, labor was at a premium, and those surfs who survived had some leverage. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:44 | 5029313 Clycntct
Clycntct's picture

Where were you when I was loosing at roulette?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:55 | 5029643 mc225
mc225's picture

maybe it's actually .255%

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:05 | 5028578 Bangin7GramRocks
Bangin7GramRocks's picture

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:22 | 5028702 luckystars
luckystars's picture

Jim Cramer "Bear is fine"

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:53 | 5029633 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

Timothy Geithner: There is no risk of USA losing it's AAA ratings. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HDCvqgxrrE

Colin Powell: Iraq has WMD: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpsP_flmdqA

Guantanamo and everything else Obama:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDDbTaWpwoc

And the finale: I DID NOT HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH THAT WOMAN: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBe_guezGGc

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:41 | 5028409 Duffy
Duffy's picture

yeah this is different...

this is bad.

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028425 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

I'm going to adhere to this one.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:48 | 5028456 pods
pods's picture

Like I need another reason not to go to Africa.

Did they every #BringOurGirlsBack?

pods

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:51 | 5028477 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

It isn't so much you don't need to go to Africa. It is that you don't need to be near anyone that has been there in the last month. In a month, it will be you don't need to be near anyone who has been near anyone who was in Africa two months ago. In two months, it will be you don't need to be near anyone.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:52 | 5028481 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

#leavethosegirlsthere

sorry, I had to.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:55 | 5028505 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

Too soon?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:58 | 5028533 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

One thing to be kidnapped by crazed terrisissis but another in an area with Ebola rolling around from Fruit bat to monkey to human.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:15 | 5028650 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Mosquitoes have the magic ability to suck blood out of one creature and inject it into another.

Q: Mosquitoes are:

a) Communist
b) Socialist
c) Fascist
d) Terrizzzt
e) All of the above

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:22 | 5028680 pods
pods's picture

Oh, I will also be on the lookout for cab drivers (or mosquitoes) who are bleeding out of their arses.

I don't think I have to worry about coming into contact with any African semen anytime soon so we're good there.

pods

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:29 | 5028753 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

That's right! Africa does not have a Navy. Good thing!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:38 | 5028835 Jack Sheet
Jack Sheet's picture

just remember a jet of semen can travel 12 inches at least...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:12 | 5029102 knukles
knukles's picture

WTF?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:43 | 5029308 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

Sorry to hear you've been struggling in the dating department.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:25 | 5028727 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

Mosquitoes are disease spreaders, so all of the above.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:08 | 5029057 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

"Mosquitoes (government) have the magic ability to suck blood (FRNs) out of one creature (wallet) and inject it into another."

 

Oh, shit!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:13 | 5028631 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

#whataboutfuckingdetroit

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:16 | 5028657 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Fucking? Isn't it already fucked?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:11 | 5029088 knukles
knukles's picture

fonz, this place has eaten your young mind down to its most basic sick fuck reptilian stub
I commend your wisdom and insights.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:56 | 5028522 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

According to the rule of 72 it will be a million deaths by Christmas at current rate.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:16 | 5028645 Seek_Truth
Seek_Truth's picture

Rather conservative estimate, I'd say, given that if only 0.01% of just the 30,000 they are said to be tracking turn out to be positive, and infect just 3 others for the first 3 days they are communicable carriers of Ebola, that is before they can no longer function.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:31 | 5028768 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

72 virgins dead by Christmas? Wait, what?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:03 | 5029023 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

That rule doesn't apply here.

The function in this case is more like a network graph than a simple mathematical exponent. System dynamics apply, and they change everything.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:55 | 5028518 General Decline
General Decline's picture

It's a complete shit hole.  I've been to Gabon a few times and the place is swimming in garbage.  The Mauritanians kicked the French out about 40 years ago and nobody has picked up a single piece of garbage since.  It does give the cows and goats something to graze on I guess.  I would only eat seafood when I was there.  Extremely well done, of course. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:23 | 5028706 fuu
fuu's picture

Interstingly enough the Gabonese seem to have the highest natural immunity to Ebola.

 

http://en.ird.fr/the-media-centre/scientific-newssheets/337-possible-nat...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:15 | 5029122 knukles
knukles's picture

The only scientific explanation, akin to the kid picking up used gum out of the toilet and chewing on it, is that they've been culturally inoculated with chimpanzee related french kissing and anal sex.  I'm not sure how chimp hand-jobs go....

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:16 | 5029133 fuu
fuu's picture

This is my rifle, this is my gun...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 17:24 | 5029513 Overfed
Overfed's picture

A chimp will bite yer dick right off and eat it. Horrifying creatures, chimpanzees.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:58 | 5028532 smokintoad
smokintoad's picture

Looks like they are sending them back one at a time.

http://www.aljazeera.com/news/africa/2014/07/female-suicide-bomber-kills...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:20 | 5028684 25or6to4
25or6to4's picture

@pod
In Amerika You don't go to Africa, Africa comes to you.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:23 | 5028707 luckystars
luckystars's picture

Texas Doctor who has Ebola. His wife and kids left a 2 days before he got sick, if you believe the main stream media.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028420 maskone909
maskone909's picture

maybe if they spent less money on spying on people while they masturbate, they could have put a little more emphasis on containment procedures for these sorts of things.  trillions wasted.  way to go fuck heads

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:49 | 5028457 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

With today's phones having cameras on both sides of the phone chances are the US gubmint has O faces and crotch shots on each and every one of us. 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:21 | 5028698 pods
pods's picture

I make sure I look over at the webcam when I am in the vinegar strokes and wink after the money shot.
But hey, I have always had a flair for the dramatic.

pods 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:00 | 5028476 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

I know this is probably incredibly racist to say somehow... but wouldn't it be wiser to ban flights/boats/buses donkey carts etc. from leaving these areas rather than focusing on warning incredibly stupid people not to go there?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:01 | 5028556 PartysOver
PartysOver's picture

You are a racist!!!!!!!!!  Logical with common sense.   But still a racist.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:10 | 5028606 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Yes, you are likely a rat-bastard tea-bagging racist.

Next thing you will likely be calling for immigration control and protecting the border from invading diseased children and criminals.

Join the club.

 

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:21 | 5028676 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

Is a border still a border or is it merely a transition zone now?

They will be asking these deep questions soon in Africa if this disease gets out of hand...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:54 | 5028956 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Yes in fact that is exactly the way it used to be done. Very common.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:13 | 5028628 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

As if 'they' care about your well-being and this was just a misallocation of resources due to bad planning and prioritization.  I agree with the sentiment, but I don't think containing these sorts of things is high on their priority list, and that's why it wasn't emphasized.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028427 jagercali
jagercali's picture

Nothing to worry about here folks.....just keeps getting worse and worse.....but don't worry we are all OK......wonder if the market tanking has a connection.....smart money pulling out fast......

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028429 STG5IVE
STG5IVE's picture

Ebola has hit the Bong!

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:43 | 5028431 PTR
PTR's picture

Huh. If it escalates, could be useful for border lockdown (multi-nation, at that.)

 

That's the excuse I would use.  

 

Just sayin'.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:47 | 5028438 fuu
fuu's picture

At least President Ernest Bai Koroma of Sierra Leone and President Ellen Johnson Sirleaf of Liberia have decided to skip the US-African summit in DC on Monday. As much as I dislike Washington DC I really don't wish Ebola on anyone.

 

Too bad President Alpha Conde of Guinea is still going to attend.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:53 | 5028497 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

"I really don't wish Ebola on anyone" if janet or ben or jamie or llyod or alan or hank, etc were to get it, i'd probably chuckle.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:54 | 5028506 fuu
fuu's picture

I am now conflicted.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:45 | 5028439 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

call Dustin Hoffman - he knows what to do

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:07 | 5028589 crazybob369
crazybob369's picture

Or better yet that really hot doc in the Last Ship.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:46 | 5028440 Tjeff1
Tjeff1's picture

Just wait until it goes airborne

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:51 | 5028467 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

According to recent studies it indeed has...http://scgnews.com/ebola-what-youre-not-being-told

From the article - "

A study conducted in 2012 showed that Ebola was able to travel between pigs and monkeys that were in separate cages and were never placed in direct contact.

Though the method of transmission in the study was not officially determined, one of the scientists involved, Dr. Gary Kobinger, from the National Microbiology Laboratory at the Public Health Agency of Canada, told BBC News that he believed that the infection was spread through large droplets that were suspended in the air.
"What we suspect is happening is large droplets; they can stay in the air, but not long; they don't go far," he explained. "But they can be absorbed in the airway, and this is how the infection starts, and this is what we think, because we saw a lot of evidence in the lungs of the non-human primates that the virus got in that way."

Translation: Ebola IS an airborne virus."

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:04 | 5028509 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

So all we have to do now is keep the pigs far away from the monkeys.

 

If this shit ever hits Washington D.C. it's all over... nothing there but big buildings full of pigs and monkeys as far as the eye can see...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 14:51 | 5028479 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

Some believe it already has. The Reston version of it is so it's just a mutation away.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:00 | 5029001 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

If people are collapsing in airports it most certainly has gone airborne.   It has also gone busborne, trainborne and boatborne.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:08 | 5028591 The Wedge
The Wedge's picture

It can't go airborne, unless it does.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:15 | 5028637 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

Not sure if ebola is airborne yet -- but something certainly changed -- because it's now traveling further and faster than it used to. And it clearly caught some researchers and health care workers by surprise.

I've been saying keep an eye on this one and I guess the CDC is of the same opinion.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:28 | 5028744 Seek_Truth
Seek_Truth's picture

If it (which has been proven) can be aerosolized such that pigs can get it from pigs, pigs can get it from bats, etc- why is there even a question that is has become aerosolized such that human to human transmission is not possible?

I fail to see how those dots refuse to be connected by some. Cognitive Dissonance?

Of course, maybe there a invisible spaceships and aliens that are acting on our behalf, and preventing humans from being infected by clearly pneumatic means that have been observed in other species.

No, guess not:

http://www.msdsonline.com/resources/msds-resources/free-safety-data-shee...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:37 | 5028829 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

It's not the way you think. There are many strains of this bug and each behaves differently. There are aerosolized ebola that infect humans without the person showing any symptoms of any kind. So those variants need to learn how to kill us.

On the other hand the one that can kill us, doesn't spread via aerosols. Why? Don't know. Could it learn that trick? Oh yeah you bet. So has it learned that trick ...

Maybe.

Or maybe, it learned it but not really well. Which is not quite the same thing.

It's complicated. There are not just a few dots to connect. These are evolutionary pathways. But they might be connecting right now, we don't know.

I am genuinely concerned, but not alarmed ... not yet.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 15:51 | 5028925 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

By "learned it but not really well," you mean aerosolized, but you have to be sneezed on directly because the virus will die within 10 or 20 seconds of leaving the body or some such thing?

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:07 | 5029044 Seek_Truth
Seek_Truth's picture

"The Ebola virus can survive for several days outside the body, including on the skin"

Source:

http://www.nhs.uk/news/2014/07July/Pages/Ebola-threat-to-the-UK-is-very-...

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:13 | 5029113 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

Or it can be aerosolized but only inefficiently, or only under rare circumstances.

But notice, if the bug that learns the trick even a little has an advantage, then that become the evolutionary pathway for the next round of spread. That's what happens over time, these things "suddenly" seem to learn a new trick, but really it was just one variant getting an advantage and becoming more common.

These things do not evolve gradually, rather they jump into whole new configurations nearly overnight. It is called "saltation" and unless you have the right training you would not believe it happens. It just blows you away when you see it happen. Like it's the work of God or something.

I think ebola jumped last year. Big time. It can spread further and faster now and subsequently has escaped the confinement of the countryside. And now that it is being found in urban areas the chance of another jump just went up a lot. We might see something really terrifying any day emerge from Monrovia or Lagos or some similar.

Thu, 07/31/2014 - 16:28 | 5029215 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

I believe that things like that can happen, especially with something as (comparatively) simple as a virus.  If a bacteria can evolve the ability to eat nylon, a virus can damned sure be subjected to some minor mutation that has a huge effect on us.

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