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8 Months of Muppet Brutality: Why And Where Goldman Told Clients To Buy Banco Espirito Santo

Tyler Durden's picture


Another day, another case of unprecedented muppet brutality, or, as Cramer would say: "Bear Espirito Stearns is fine"...

Rewind to January 14, 2014 where Goldman said:

Buy BES: Winner at home, recovering abroad


In our view, BES is (1) optimally positioned to gain from Portugal’s banking market evolution and (2) likely to benefit from improving margins in Angola. With the stock trading at a 29% discount to peers’ 2015E P/TBV and with 28% upside to our 12m target price of €1.55, we upgrade BES to Buy.


* * *


Positioning: Looking beyond the crisis – BES best placed


Resilience to asset quality deterioration determined banks’ ability to withstand the effects of the economic and financial crisis. Those effects, however, have their cause in macroeconomic imbalances that led Portugal to ask for financial assistance from the EU/IMF. Addressing those causes will determine the future shape of the Portuguese banking market and the relative positioning of the banks. In this context, we develop a theoretical (and severe) scenario to assess relative positioning in a deleveraging economy: under this scenario, we estimate that Portuguese banks would need to delever by a further €35 bn domestic loans (or 15%) by 2020 to partially reverse the imbalances that contributed to the crisis. This is a top-end assumption and depends heavily on the country’s future macroeconomic performance. In this negative scenario, we show that BES would be best positioned to gain from a “race to the bottom”. Our estimate is harsh, but we still believe that it is a good proxy for the underlying trends in the lending market. In this context, even under more benign scenarios, BES is best placed.

Goldman had BES at a Buy until, well, now.

So how did the stock perform during this period?

And now... the common is finished, or would be if it wasn't halted.

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Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:28 | 5043908 _ConanTheLibert...
Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:30 | 5043928 Hugh G Rection
Hugh G Rection's picture

Bert and Ernie need to lay off the meth.

Watch my old lady go brutal with a barrett .50

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:33 | 5043945 synergize
synergize's picture

Now if only we could dress up Goldman as a 7-year old palestinian boy with a fist-size rock in his hands we could save the muppets (with the help of American tax dollars and Israeli cluster bombs)...

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:58 | 5044031 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Goldman Sachs, ha ha ha ha ha...

What is Goldman saying about the below?

-- gold?

-- industrials/cyclical stocks?

-- banks?

Take the other side of their recommendations?


* * *


Or buy iridium and Bitcoin!



Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:01 | 5044084 Stackers
Stackers's picture

That reverse wealth effect is a biatch

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:11 | 5044134 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Well, they got one part right. BES won that "race to the bottom!"

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:21 | 5044175 Headbanger
Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:50 | 5044339 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Jesus, are you still at with him?  

Even if you were right (you're not), you need to understand he's enjoying every minute of your epic melt-down.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:33 | 5043948 Keyser
Keyser's picture

I use GS recommendations as a contra-indicator... Works like a charm... 

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:44 | 5044001 813kml
813kml's picture

I postulate that GS has trafficked much more cocaine than the Contras.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:37 | 5044040 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Certainly GS has forced their muppets to use lots more Xanax!


Who makes Xanax...?

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:00 | 5044076 PT
PT's picture

re "I use GS recommendations as a contra-indicator" :

Does that mean you bought some CDSs?

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 13:27 | 5044548 Government need...
Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

The trick is knowing how much time to allow between the initial Goldman Sachs "recommendation" and your fade.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:33 | 5043950 Keyser
Keyser's picture


Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:56 | 5044057 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Awesome way to get rid of the red light, Hugh!

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:38 | 5043971 junction
junction's picture

Looking at the chart, it sems that the muppets went BES stock cliff diving with fatal financial consequences.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:30 | 5043923 Tenshin Headache
Tenshin Headache's picture

The beatings will continue until calm is restored.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:31 | 5043932 Hugh G Rection
Hugh G Rection's picture

Bibi? Is that you?

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:34 | 5043943 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

I didn't go past "Looking beyond the crisis" Anyone who followed their advice after reading past that line deserved to be crushed.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:45 | 5043935 813kml
813kml's picture

Curious to know if all Goldman clients have Stockholm Syndrome.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:07 | 5044111 PT
PT's picture

They can't be wrong this many times in a row.  Surely I'm going to win this next one!  I'll buy a few CDSs in case I'm wrong!



You're right.  GS clients need to be locked up for their own good.  Or at least for the sake of GS clients' clients.  Someone should do an investigation on GS's clients.  If I owned a taxi company and one of my drivers kept smashing cars, I'd want to know why.  And if the manager didn't care about how many cars were crashing, I'd also want to know why.


Mon, 08/04/2014 - 14:30 | 5044904 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

If crashing cars was all they did. They start with overcharging their fares. Then they ride you all over town running up the bill BEFORE they crash you into the brick building destoying you and the car. 

Tue, 08/05/2014 - 00:41 | 5047617 PT
PT's picture

Never drive in a taxi that is owned by a panel beater, a tow truck company, a hospital and a funeral director.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:31 | 5043936 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Goldman needed someone to sell their crap to.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 15:16 | 5045085 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

I read that as 'Goldman is crap'

hope that's ok

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:31 | 5043937 mademesmile
mademesmile's picture

WOW, that's ugly chart porn.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:34 | 5043957 GFORCE
GFORCE's picture

Tyler should make a montage of their finest muppet slayings! Or a Cramer vs GS prospectus for wealth destruction.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:47 | 5044014 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Only THE FED has that much paper.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:40 | 5043980 RiskyBidness
RiskyBidness's picture

CNBC says BTFD!!  Bwahahahahahaha!  

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:14 | 5044157 PT
PT's picture

It has to go up so they can avoid paying out the CDS.  STFCDS!

Buy The Fucking NSA Tap On The Powers That Bes' Telephones And Buy And Sell Whatever They Buy And Sell!

err, sorry.  Obviously it's well past my bed time.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:41 | 5043989 RiskyBidness
RiskyBidness's picture

Looks like Kermit was stricken with Ebama.....I mean Ebola!!

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:46 | 5044010 Colonel Klink
Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:49 | 5044020 Duffy
Duffy's picture

fuck anybody listening to GS.

C students from the Ivy League - a bunch of schools where As are dispensed based primarily on sucessfully spelling one's name on the exams - pretending to have an objective basis for their speculatory onanism.



Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:49 | 5044023 vyeung
vyeung's picture

people that listen to GS deserve the slaughter.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:12 | 5044142 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Thing is, most of them likely manage OPM, and will never face reprecussions from acting on GS "advice."

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:27 | 5044230 Loucleve
Loucleve's picture

THAT is exactly the point.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:53 | 5044025 SillySalesmanQu...
SillySalesmanQuestion's picture

Poooooor Kermit....the Cookie Monster told him to buy all the fresh cookies he could, as they would be worth a lot more later. Unfortunately for Kermit, the cookies were well past their expiration date, full of parasites and totally worthless. He opened a bag and the parasites killed him....slowly, until they bled him dry....a very sad story indeed.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:51 | 5044034 WTFUD
WTFUD's picture

Goldman reps are on the front line in East Ukraine selling the organs of wounded mercs.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 11:59 | 5044071 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

In a rational world GS bankers would be dying by the dozens from gunshot wounds to the head courtesy of financially destitute "clients".

Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose.

It is coming.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:02 | 5044086 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

GS clients = bagholders


nothing new here

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:13 | 5044148 Monty Burns
Monty Burns's picture

The clients deserve what they get. It is totally and blatantly obvious that the squid is little better than a criminal organization feasting on the peasants. They are 'wrong'  the whole time with their 'advice' and most  important of all they're players in the market themselves!!   How the hell can you expect impartial advice in these circumstances???

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:21 | 5044190 redux2redux
redux2redux's picture

How to make a small fortune with GS?


Start with a large fortune.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:39 | 5044287 Brentonius
Brentonius's picture

Anything GS says do the opposite. Then wait for the cha-ching!

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 12:42 | 5044304 monopoly
monopoly's picture

And young college economic graduates want to work for this scum bag company Beyond words.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 13:30 | 5044558 Government need...
Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

What happens when the only entity acting in the same direction of the Goldman "recommendation" is the Federal Reserve Bank?

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 13:45 | 5044647 Jano
Jano's picture

The people, who follow GS, deserve a bullet, I mean, they are a suicide candidates.

Only a moron would deal with GS and follow GS. I mean a bribed & corrupt Greek governmend did it as well.

Mon, 08/04/2014 - 15:49 | 5045268 mastersnark
mastersnark's picture

Isn't "8 Months of Muppet Brutality" the name of an unreleased single by The Misfits?

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