Stocks Up, Bonds Up, Gold Up, Oil Up, Dollar Up, F'd Up

Tyler Durden's picture


Worst Japanese consumer spending data drop ever - BTFD. China financing slowed - BTFD. European industrial production tumbled - BTFD. US retail sales miss dramatically - BTFD. The worse the news the better the buy-the-dippiness as between JPY (102.50) and VIX (12 handle), US equities shrugged off shitty data and worsening geopolitics to jump to August highs. But it wasn't just stocks... investors piled into Treasuries (slamming yields 7bps lower from pre-retail sales), bought gold (back over $1310), bid for US Dollars (now up 0.25% on the week), and lifted oil prices (WTI $97.50). S&P futures volume was the worst of the week (50% below average). Notable oddities: Copper clubbed today (-2% on the week), Brent-WTI jumped $1.50, and the VIX curve remains inverted for 14th day in a row.

The last 24 hours have been "odd" to say the least - in a new normal way of course... (and volume remains abysmal) with futures driven by the European session one way or another and then stalling as EU closes...


On the day, Nasdaq outperformed notably


As bonds and stocks were both bid...The MOAR QE TRADE


And all that mattered fun-durr-mentally was AUDJPY...


VIX cracked back to a 12 handle helping stocks surge...


VIX has now been inverted (short-dated risk above longer-dated risk) for 14 days...


The entire Treasury curve cracked 5-7bps lower after retail sales hit...


And despite a big plunge on retail sales, the USD kept on its path higher (helped by a dump in GBP)...


Gold and WTI rose but copper wass smacked lower after Chinese credit data and US retail sales...


Brent-WTI jumped $1.50 today... as Brent surged


Charts: Bloomberg

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Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:09 | 5088810 knukles
knukles's picture

A rising tide of fiat lifts all assets

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:15 | 5088842 kliguy38
kliguy38's picture

nuttn that cant be sunk with a well placed gold spike.........and they will fight THAT

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:20 | 5088877 wallstreetapost...
wallstreetaposteriori's picture

just waiting patiently for the cascade selling to begin... I wonder when investors are going to figure out the fed has been playing a game of nuclear hot potato.  Keep BTFD bagholders....

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:57 | 5089052 Eyeroller
Eyeroller's picture

The sheeple have figured it out about the Fed and the manipulated numbers.

They know.

But the sheeple believe they can ride the Fed Crazy Train all the way to the top and jump off (sell) just before the crash.

They tell themselves that when they see the end is coming, they'll get out.



Wed, 08/13/2014 - 17:07 | 5089120 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

I'd rather watch from the sidelines and jump in after the water settles from this ship going under. Lest I get sucked under by the rush of water following this ship down.


Anyone that is playing with paper now is putting themselves at a great pile of risk of being unable to pull their funds out when the ship starts to capsize. 

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 17:29 | 5089233 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

Any one mildly curious what tomorrow looks like with the ending of the silver fix? Will there actually be some semblance of true price discovery or will they retain all the same ability to keep smacking it down whenever it suits them? That's somewhat rhetorical as i'm sure we will still be subject to the manipulations.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 17:32 | 5089248 CH1
CH1's picture

Reality is on an extended vacation.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 20:19 | 5090041 enforcer92677
enforcer92677's picture

The guys in the office that have been mocking me for declaring that market is on the brink of a crash came over later to my desk and said they sort of agree with me but intend to keep riding it up until we see a "real pullback" like 5-10% and then they will go ahead and sell their position and wait for the bottom to buy back in.

I can't help but think they will get crushed at the exit with everyone else.  I even explained that to them.  But I've been wrong on calling a crash too early so my statements just get shrugged off.

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 07:20 | 5091327 infotechsailor
infotechsailor's picture

Instead of calling a crash you should call the feds bluff that it will fully taper. You know that ain't gonna happen. And that's the only way there will be a market crash in USD. Is if yellen ends QE and raises rates.

The fed will do moar at some  point. And its to the moon for stocks. And everything else including your food and energy.

. Gold > foreign stocks > real estate > us stocks > cash > treasuries. 

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 18:31 | 5094606 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

I can't even imagine how this could go wrong.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:36 | 5088941 Syrin
Syrin's picture

No kidding.   Gold has been over the magic $1300/ounce threshold for a while now.   Time for some anonymous sell off of a few hundred tons of gold to knock it back into its place.   Can't let market forces take effect.  Conference call of the five major banks must be scheduled for the morning.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:38 | 5088956 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

Takes time for that HIndu temple gold to be delivered.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 19:17 | 5089734 knukles
knukles's picture

The India Reichsbank is paying them interest on that specie. 
Loan Gold?

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 17:58 | 5094392 MeelionDollerBogus
Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:21 | 5088878 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

So today most asset classes were up against the dollar and the dollar was up against most other fiat?

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:27 | 5088908 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Bought two Dec. Silver Contracts for $19.900 today. basically using profits from my recent S&P500 shorts. Will short the S&P500 again at 1980 actual; in the Dec. Contract whatever that is at that time. I don't expect this for a few weeks. I'm willing to see $19.750 intraday on Dec. Silver; after that I'll crap out. I'm interpreting the charts as showing a lot of shorts in the market who have had it all their way; it just looks like it's time for a rally.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 17:23 | 5089201 Cattender
Cattender's picture

Thank you president OBunga.. I am REALLY starting to believe we are in a Recovery! LOL!!!!

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:12 | 5088811 Squid Viscous
Squid Viscous's picture

the Vix smash has been amazing, where is that fucking convoy?

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:15 | 5088839 NOTaREALmerican
Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:12 | 5088831 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

5 dots for the Headline.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:13 | 5088833 q99x2
q99x2's picture

The way things are going the FED is soon to take control of my dick.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:15 | 5088846 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

You'll know because that sucker will be up for 5 years straight.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:25 | 5088896 Muppet
Muppet's picture

For an erection that persists for four years or more, please see your doctor.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:36 | 5088946 Syrin
Syrin's picture

Or Heidi Fleiss

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 17:09 | 5089132 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

Maybe ten years ago. You guys are old :-P

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 19:19 | 5089743 knukles
knukles's picture

Didju guys hear Marylin Monroe died?

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 17:26 | 5094293 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

For a market erection lasting 4 years or more, please see your spindoctor.

There, fixed it for ya.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:23 | 5088891 EHM
EHM's picture

At least it will be up.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:35 | 5088940 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Do you know a girl named Banks?

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 17:24 | 5094268 MeelionDollerBogus
Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:13 | 5088835 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

It's almost like it's...... manipulated or something.  I dunno.  Maybe it's just me.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:18 | 5088862 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

Maybe, it's just stupidity?   There seems to be allot of that in the world.   

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:19 | 5088864 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

Bad is good, good is good, everything is good!

Damn Ebola, Ukraine, Japan, Syria, Libya, Iraq, Afghanistan, Portuguese or South African bank insolvency, massive job cuts, riots in Amerika.......nothing matters in la la land any more!

There is nothing that freshly printed notes cannot cover up! 


Can't remember which text book prescribed this equation, but I am sure there was someone who won a Nobel Prize for that!


Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:42 | 5088969 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

They're just running the biggest crowd control operation ever.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:20 | 5088871 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

This must be 'the tapering' yea sure if anything the Fed has increased to around $120 billion a month I'm estimating.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:22 | 5088882 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

Any day now...

And when it happens it will be like the worst case of diarrehea that will require burial in shoebox in it's aftermath for the markets!

Special thanks to those British kids whos parents work at the Bank of London for the forecast!!!!

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:21 | 5088886 Muppet
Muppet's picture

Stocks up!  As retail plunges, St. Louis burns, Ebola gains strength, Vegas goes dry.    Hopefully, an asteriod will hit so the S&P can beat 2000.  

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:22 | 5088889 gcjohns1971
gcjohns1971's picture

Not to be stupid but does the Fed actually have to buy treasuriies to create cash?

Couldn't they just buy, well, everything?

Couldn't they buy everything through proxies, like the Primary Dealer banks?  But all funded by creative additions to their respective reserve accounts?

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:23 | 5088892 lost money
lost money's picture

And once again you people lost money

It's simple eocnomics. People looking for safety run to treasuries. yeilds plummet. if you want yield you have to go to stocks. more demand equals higher prices. Also there is an old adage that says when rates are low, stocks will grow. Bad news means more QE/less tapering. Money printing is inflationary. in an inflationary environment prices go up. so stock prices go up.

stop listenng to ron paul and blaming the fed or the joooss and all the other nonsense on this site, pay attention and MAKE SOME DAMN MONEY YOU IDIOTS.

and dont tell me about how you have ben buying gold for 30 yrs. If the balloon goes up, your $20 gold piece will buy $20 worth of food not 1200 because the store won't make that kind of trnsaction, they will deal in face value only. then the cashier will pulll out a fiatsco as you call it, put it in the till and walk off with the gold that you paid 1500 for at the top of the market last year.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:31 | 5088924 Muppet
Muppet's picture

Wrong on so many levels.   Do you have any sense of right and wrong, good and bad?   These markets are corrupted.   Go ahead and keep gaming.   That'll be me at the window when you come to cash your few chips.   I now sit and watch this casino from the outside longsince knowing that theres a time to walk away.... and a time to run.    

Thu, 08/14/2014 - 17:14 | 5094251 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

Can't be any more risky than Russian Roulette with hookers in West Africa.
Will it be HIV or Ebola?
Luck be a lady!

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:33 | 5088928 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Your avatar is right.

Don't come here whining when you lose all your 'profits' to some algo in a hoody.

None of this is new,its been tried before,and always fails.

Its different this time though, right.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:59 | 5089070 Eyeroller
Eyeroller's picture

"lost money" believes he can sell just before the crash.

Because, of course, he'll see itcoming.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:35 | 5088929 Squid Viscous
Squid Viscous's picture

"lost money" - how was the ride down from 1990 SPX? that must have sucked balls, but now you're an expert, again?

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:38 | 5088949 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

"Listen to me people, smash the window and grab some Nike's while the getting is good!

All you have to do is go in the store and take what you want, it's not like it's hurting anybody!"

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:49 | 5089009 Who was that ma...
Who was that masked man's picture

Wow!  Just WOW!  Nothing else t say.

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 18:23 | 5089475 Billy Shears
Billy Shears's picture

You are retarded:

"...because the store won't make that kind of trnsaction, they will deal in face value only."

That sentence says all that needs to be said about your ability to reason rationally.


Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:25 | 5088899 BullyBearish
BullyBearish's picture

The only way to win is not to play...

Wed, 08/13/2014 - 16:38 | 5088951 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

In this market, everyone forgot the first rule of gambling. That is, when you sit down at the table and look around and can't pick out the rube, it's you. Lots of complacency out there, because everyone has a nice pile of chips and thinks they can only keep winning hands.

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