"A Random Straight Line On Wall Street"

Tyler Durden's picture


Rumors are rife that Burton Malkiel is preparing a sequel to his previous blockbuster that will be titled "A Random Straight Line On Wall Street." Because, simply put, random walks are so pre-central-planning...


Just by eyeballing the lower pane in this chart, see if you can figure out the down days and up days...


These are your "markets"


Chart: Bloomberg

Your rating: None

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Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:39 | 5127045 kliguy38
kliguy38's picture

looks like my honey moon nite

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:49 | 5127097 Four chan
Four chan's picture

lol, a freemarket only a robot could love.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 19:23 | 5127575 Leveraged Algorithm
Leveraged Algorithm's picture

With those tits - something is going up on low volume....

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 20:36 | 5127924 max2205
max2205's picture

'Hockey Sticks are Forever'

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:51 | 5127106 BandGap
BandGap's picture

Going up on low volume?

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:39 | 5127050 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

lets just pull that chart out a little more....


Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:39 | 5127052 Pareto
Pareto's picture

.....and these are your markets in the absence of voluntary exchange...........................Any questions?

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:47 | 5127071 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

Wow, they really finally got things under control.  If that doesn't give you confidence to BTFD and BTFATH, what will?  Downside of course is that the world has lost one of its examples of random behavior.  Show the volume going back farther!

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:55 | 5127135 BandGap
BandGap's picture

Things will change. Even the fed will eventually lose to entropy. The universe deems it so.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 18:03 | 5127166 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

Or MAYBE, first they overcame common-sense economics (Eg you can spend more than you make forever, as long as you make a complicated enough system) and NOW they've managed to overcome the laws of physics!  Next up, the perpetual motion machine! (Or maybe the market IS the perpetual motion machine!) 

These are exciting days - it used to be that major scientific discoveries came from scientists, but now they come from bankers and thieves! (and yes, I realize that 'bankers and thieves' is a redundancy)

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 20:39 | 5127931 max2205
max2205's picture

Maybe they will make it go sideways for 8 mor years....that'll fuck up,some people

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:44 | 5127074 ...out of space
...out of space's picture

it is more that 80 degre  angle

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:50 | 5127095 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

It's so fractal!  At first I thought it was a multi-year chart going back to 2007.  Again, I tip my hat to the artists who are creating this market, well done!  Next, paint a pony, or a unicorn shitting skittles!

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:49 | 5127104 Four chan
Four chan's picture

lol same here, because it is the same.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:49 | 5127099 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

Well,  Alan did say they had eliminated the business cycle.  

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:52 | 5127114 viator
viator's picture

I think it's great, Buy SP500 and retire.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:53 | 5127127 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Yep, a stright line to wherever. Not even gusessing at this point.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:52 | 5127116 yogibear
yogibear's picture

NY Federal Reserve trading desk bots must take it ever higher. No problem with unlimited money.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:52 | 5127117 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

the last bastion of free market capitalism on earth [/sarcasm]

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:53 | 5127125 Notsobadwlad
Notsobadwlad's picture

There have been no truly free markets for a very, very, very long time.

The scale of the theft and fraud is absolutely mindboggling, or would be if the central bankers and their cronies were not behind it. (it is easy to envision that evil, with ultimate resources could create the ultimate control mechanism, given time).

Here is the thing: "this too shall pass" and people will survive long after the system of theft and planned destruction has decayed and been forgotten.

They will NOT "get it right" (as they so wish) this time and eternally enslave the world and its souls.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:54 | 5127126 money badger
money badger's picture

Is it my imagination or is the trading volume vs avg. forming the dreaded "sawtooth" pattern?  Oh well, I guess that means the tree called "S&P Futures" will soon be called the "S&P Pasts".    TIMBERRRRR !!!!!

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:57 | 5127145 Equality 7-25-1
Equality 7-25-1's picture

Does that look human to you?

Yellen looks very much descended from the things gothic architecture warned us about.

They all do.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 17:57 | 5127147 kaa1016
kaa1016's picture

Stop complaining about the markets and make money trading it. I understand that some don't have the necessary skill to do so regardless of what the market is doing, but it is what it is. If one doesn't like the market, don't trade. Like Donald Rumsfeld said "you go to war with the army that you have, not the one you wish you had".

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 18:04 | 5127184 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

Trade?  What trade?  Buy on margin, hold, then when your margin increases, buy more!  That's not 'trading'.

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 18:06 | 5127193 QEternity
QEternity's picture

Until you lose every fucking penny thinking you can be the first one out the exit just like everyone else

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 18:31 | 5127329 Ewtman
Ewtman's picture

Not much left to the top... by this Elliott Wave count.




Thu, 08/21/2014 - 19:50 | 5127717 Kprime
Kprime's picture

so .gov builds another bridge to nowhere, what's new?


I like the cool, 6 year, perfect 45 degree slope

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 20:38 | 5127929 Keltner Channel Surf
Keltner Channel Surf's picture

I suppose mid-Aug volume would always be below average.  As the Fed has removed any need to sell, perhaps automatic 401(k) moves into Vanguard funds are enough to dribble indices forward daily.  While you’d think they’d have algos to keep their paltry summer VWAP buys flatter,  positive performance doesn’t hurt inflows (and hence, income), so more heavy-handed purchases are fine, helping to grow the wealth of those investing earlier with the new monies.  I think there’s a term for that type of scheme, but it escapes me at the moment . . .

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 21:25 | 5128080 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

jut LOOK at this motherfucker ,Frankenstein "market" if every trader participating in this circus is that stupid as the chart shows than there is only one fix to it as always was


Thu, 08/21/2014 - 21:32 | 5128096 netpounder
netpounder's picture

Who needs fortune tellers to give you the lottery numbers?  No need to even invent a time travel machine to go to the future, get the lottery numbers and come back to play those numbers.  Just buy S&P futures.  S&P Futures = S&P Future Riches bitches!

Thu, 08/21/2014 - 23:08 | 5128413 Quaderratic Probing
Quaderratic Probing's picture

Free markets and price discovery seem a little stupid now, just buy and wait for your reward. 

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