Sorry, Angelo Mozilo Can't Be Sued: He Is Sick

Tyler Durden's picture

After years of evading the tentacles of the US government, yesterday the crosshairs of American justice (the civil, not criminal variety) which may be blindfolded but certainly has an offshore bank account, finally locked onto the orange man who made over half a billion between 1999 to 2008, according to compensation-research firm Equilar, not to mention saddling Bank of America with the worst Easter egg M&A transaction in history. Well, it turns out the US government may not be able to sue the Moz after all. The reason? He is sick.

From the NYT:

In 2011, the United States attorney’s office in Los Angeles decided not to file criminal charges against Mr. Mozilo. But in recent months, the office’s civil division has turned the spotlight back on Mr. Mozilo, whose company originated mortgages that went to people with little income to repay them, causing devastating losses for investors who bought the loans.


But a complication has emerged: Mr. Mozilo’s lawyers have cautioned the prosecutors in Los Angeles that their client has a serious illness. The prosecutors have sought Mr. Mozilo’s health records, the people said, though for now the case remains on track.


In a statement, Mr. Mozilo’s lawyer, David Siegel, said that he would “not comment on reported rumors concerning any investigation.” He added, however, that “there is no sound or fair basis, in law or fact, to pursue any claim against Angelo Mozilo. This story has gone on more than long enough; Mr. Mozilo stands virtually alone among banking and mortgage executives to actually have been pursued by this government and already paid a record penalty” to the S.E.C.

So, if he coughs, or mysteriously turns from orange to green or any other random color, you must acquit (pending receipt of a few hundred millions in the abovementioned offshore bank account of course).

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arm50's picture

ebola, no doubt

pods's picture

It is a rare, incurable genetic disease common among Oompa Loompas.


outamyeffinway's picture

Gee I hope he doesn't die a horrible death..... /sarc off

power steering's picture

All we care about is that Jamie's bonus is safe.

BaBaBouy's picture

They Are Telling US this One "Folks" Did It All???

Holdder, Where Are All The OTHER 2008 Banksters ?????

Bunghole's picture

Did he also get some presidential cufflinks?

Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Better is to make sure really sick, so please administer adequate dosage of Polonium 210* while is dining.

(* Generic substitution of Cesium 137 is produce similar result. Both is also work on Jon Corsine.)

l8apex's picture

Boris, I would like to be the first to nominate you for the new position of "radioactive flavoring sommelier" 

nope-1004's picture

He stole Jamie Dimon's play.  Watch a few others do the same in the future.  How convenient.

If he's so sick, kill the bastard.  They shoot lame horses!


Bay of Pigs's picture

My thoughts exactly. Sue him? Seriously?

Execute the fucker.

CheapBastard's picture

Bring the suit on and if he [sadly] passes away then go after his estate, right? There's a half a billion, much of it possibly [probably] wrongfully gotten by him. The loot should not disappear b/c the criminal [alleged criminal, I'm sorry] is dead.

Oracle 911's picture

Serious illness. Maybe something with brain, if we assume he has a brain.

cynicalskeptic's picture

nothing so complex.......    terminal tanning

JRobby's picture

Cheetos throwing in to it: They will begin to market a short orange puffy pillow type snack with a white cheddar tip on it called "Mozilo"

ThroxxOfVron's picture

Better to see you again on ZH, Boris.

Keep the coming laughs, my ribs are missing you talking.

Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Here, Monsieur, try some of our finest "Atomska Voda"

It has the power to cure all sorts of ailments.

mvsjcl's picture

Now that's funny, pods.

Bastiat's picture

Of course he's sick: he's a sociopath.

power steering's picture

It's that damned daily diet of fruit bat.

chunga's picture

And he's not too sick to remember the names of his accomplices at FNMA/FHLMC/HUD/OCC/SEC/CONgress etc., etc.

Winston Churchill's picture

That would become a fatal complaint very quickly.So bad one would have to commit

suicide with six rifle shots to the back of the head.

power steering's picture

The Feds have no interest in bringing any of these assholes to justice.

sandhillexit's picture

Isn't that what Paraguay is for?

cynicalskeptic's picture

even Paraguay has its limits.  

They changed the laws when it got out that the Bush family had bought a huge tract of land there....  The Bush's have since sold their formerly extradition proof retirement home off.

ex-Nazis were ok but the Bush family?... not so much so....

JRobby's picture

Thanks. I know, you would be typing all day to list all of them.

Pigs at the trough. Slaughter all the swine.


chunga's picture

Geitner, Greenberg, Blankfein, Paulson...

It's impossible to deny there's a pattern here. Almost every single player is a bald headed guy with a pointy face. Timmy has hair but is it real?

Greenspan says it's just "human nature" but look, he's as bald as a cucumber and has a pointy face too!

JRobby's picture

"Turbo" Timmy was the ultimate face slap really. They put the dumbest fuck into the precinct closest to the crime scene.

ss123's picture

Hawaiian Tropic overdose?

Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Nah, he caught Obola*.

Now Obamacare has to step in and the DOJ has to step out.

* "Obola", Copyright 2014, Kirk2NCC1701

Da Yooper's picture

Lets seeeee my dog ate my hard drive for the IRS

& if someone tries to sue me I can use the " I am Sick" excuse


What a friggen crock of bull


one set of laws for them




another set of laws for the rest of US


getting closer to pitchforks & lampost time


Canadian Dirtlump's picture

you spelled oompa loompa wrong.


All criminals, and criminal lawyers, know that 'health complications' can be used as leverage with DAs or Crown Attornies. Mozilo has money

to hire BIG Law which means he can pay the 'cartel's' price to get-out-of-jail-free with the fiat currency that he ripped off from subprime borrowing loans that TBTF was purchasing off of him by the truckload.

Mozilo is not the first criminal to play the 'sick card' and he will not be the last either. Back in the 80s a mafia dude used to walk the streets of Brooklyn in his PJs and house coat with requisite slippers just to avoid going to jail or court. Sociopaths like Mozilo know how to game the system and that is empirically demonstrated by the amount of money he stole outright through subprime loans to Muppets that later went into default and foreclosure. Mozilo's largesse has yet to be felt by society IMHO. Furthermore, we are no longer in a growth model and Mozilo made all his money during the 'good times' so that he would be well leveraged for the bad times that would most certainly follow.

waterhorse's picture

Do you think he got sick from passing all those notes around like a whiskey bottle at a frat party?  Or maybe from doing too much of the Countrywide Hustle?  Or maybe from sniffing all that white-out he was using to "correct" borrowers' incomes?

f16hoser's picture

The 'ole Jamie Dimon Ploy.....

knukles's picture

Not affordable?!?!?!?!?!?
That doesn't even matter when forget what you pay for ObamaCare (CoveredCalifornia) out here none of the doctors or hospitals take the goddamned thing because the reimbursement rates are about naught, zip, zero, nada, end...
Another repetitive lesson in rationing and price controls.
Congrats America, you're the cheapest non-healthcare available anywhere at no price.


saveUSsavers's picture

Got CA Kaiser Bronze, wife had PET/CT scan said our out-pocket was $895, NOW THEY WANT 2400.00! ***BAIT'N SWITCH***   !

Raymond K Hessel's picture

Undo all healthcare legislation and all of sudden CTs are $50 in cash.  

GE sells the same MRI machine to the US for $200,000 that it sells to India for $2,000.  Think about it.

MeBizarro's picture

CTs aren't anywhere close to $50 and our aware that the overwhelming majority of people in India neither have access nor can afford the out-of-pocket costs of a CT scan.

Why the people who act as if we should go back to a cash-predominant system in HC are either imbeciles or cravenly deprived and willing to write off large segments of the population.  

clade7's picture

Well...that explains everything...If the carrot dont fit, you must aquit...

InjectTheVenom's picture

if he's coughin' up spit , you must acquit . . . . .

JRobby's picture

Johnny Ringo: "I want him spitting blood"

Duc888's picture




yea, I lost my HDD.


Too funny.


How about jamie?  Has he rotted off the face of the earth yet?



alexcojones's picture

Angelo may be Orange, But 7 of 8 of the so-called ad-click

"Trending" T&A babes just below the main stories on Zerohedge

are a shade of Orange Too.

Orange is the New Greenbacks, I guess

Tim Knight from Slope of Hope's picture

Explorer.......Sage......Dancer. Meet Angelo.

clade7's picture

Gotta admit, on piss fenders and tatas its attractive...