GaSNoST EXPLaiNeD...

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Tue, 09/02/2014 - 20:53 | 5173798 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

LOL William.  I have not blogged for a long time so I needed to write something for better or worse.  You can see what I have been doing for the last two months here at:

http://www.boatingaccidentnews.com/longest-summer/

 

There is one thing I will tell you here that is not in the link.  I had a ladder go down on me for the first time yesterday.  I had rained a great deal and the ground was soft.  It was almost dark and I kept pushing.  The wife and children had went back to St Cloud so I was alone.  I just kept working.  Unfortunately, I must have misplaced that one foot on the ladder on the sodden ground. 

I felt the left ladder leg sink into the sand and I knew that I was going down.  There is now way out of that situation.  I dropped my tools.  It is amazing how many things you can think of on the way down.  I hit the ground with a thud. 

There was nothing I could do except cover my head and I hit hard and I laid there for a few minutes.  What is broken?  Luckily nothing.  As I said, that is my own fault.  I got what I deserved for being stupid and not paying attention.  I blame me.  Chances are that I will not forget and to put away the tools when the day is done.  It could have been a lot worse.  I could still be laying there.  I was almost sone and the property taxes are likely to go up because i love buying donuts so much.

But I am not still laying there.  I got up and dusted myself off.  I turned on the radio to hear these idiots bitching about Ukraine, Obama in Milwaukee and then some other shit.  To be honest, I would rather fall off that ladder again then listen to those asswipes.  

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 20:56 | 5173806 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Is there anyway you can get those asswipes to fall offf the ladder instead?

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 22:59 | 5174148 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

I wish brother.  It was a unique experience and a lot flashed through my mind.  It was the feeling of helplessness that was the worst.  I had no idea what to do because you are just fucked when in that situation.  It sums up life in a lot of ways. 

The ladder bounced and landed on top of me.  I reached up and pushed the ladder off of me and just laid there for a while in a daze wondering how bad it was going to be.  There was no one there to help and I was on my own.  I think I have a broken toe and a pretty good scrape on my thigh.  Other than that I was able to get up but I was done for.  It was dark out anyway by then.

No man is an island.  I could have been in a lot worse way and there would have been no help. 

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 23:21 | 5174227 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

I hope you wear head protection when you do things like that. I would suggest the Crasch cap...Made in USA

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 11:54 | 5171351 ALANBEEKMAN
ALANBEEKMAN's picture

LOL, love the new Cold War Thesaurus WB.

Gasnost instead of Glasnost.

What do you have in mind for 'Perestroika'?

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 10:41 | 5170994 blindman
blindman's picture

.

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 10:41 | 5170993 blindman
blindman's picture

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJVlrhWaZhA
.
graham parker "don't ask me questions".
.
Crimson autograph is what we leave behind
Everywhere man set foot
War mongers laughing loud behind a painted face
Throwing tidbits to the crowd then blowing up the place

Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions please
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord ain't no answer in me

Well I stand up for liberty but can't liberate
Pent up agony I see you take first place
Well who does this treachery I shout with bleeding hand
Is it you or is it me well I never will understand

Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions please
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord ain't no answer in me

Well I see the thousands screaming rushing for the cliffs
Just like lemmings into the sea, Well well well
Who waves his mighty hand and breaks the precious rules?
Well the same one must understand who wasted all these fools

Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions please
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord don't ask me questions
Hey Lord ain't no answer in me

Ain't no answer in me no
Ain't no answer in me
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 02:18 | 5170202 teslaberry
teslaberry's picture

these gas pics are all classics, they were good when you first made them, and still good. 

 

i would like to see joe bidens son in ukraine gasnost. 

 

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 02:33 | 5170215 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

I have learned a great deal about comic timing doing this. Work that is funny intially is often funnier when presented at a later moment, perhaps because what was originally anticipated slowly but surely comes to fruition.

And this gas business has certainly not come to fruition yet, but sloely but surely with Vlad weather approaching, some high placed people are going to look extremely foolish. Far more foolish than they already look. WTF were they thinking will be the historical tag words.

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 11:47 | 5171307 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

the (ECBs) expedition into Ukraine was a bit of summer time fun, now the snow falls and the gas line from Russia has a hollow sound. real life has become a movie, ISIS is a new iteration of Indiana Jones. a ragtag group of underfunded undertrained rebels from the Syrian war. you can love them and hate them simultaneously. they are going to conquer the world, the Saudi prince says. no where can you go in the world without hearing fractured versions of american movie dialog from everyone including the leaders. entertainment (some say culture) is our greatest industry and we export it for free almost, on the satellite. all presidents have a movie they see themselves in, for Bush it was the Alamo probably, for Obama its all All the Kings Men, a Huey Long populist, who has made too many deals. sigh 

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 03:04 | 5170234 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

agree. of course, you are very prolific, so some of your work profits from a "survivor bias" of prescience. nevertheless, yes. keep it up, WB7

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 02:29 | 5170213 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 23:15 | 5169923 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

.

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 22:44 | 5169852 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Great way to laugh through a memorial day.

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:48 | 5169667 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:48 | 5169655 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 06:45 | 5170358 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Another word has been added to the American lexicon, Hillionaire.

"A person who is worth millions but claims to be dead broke." ;-)

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:46 | 5169654 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:46 | 5169647 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:45 | 5169645 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 23:09 | 5169910 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

I'm trying to regain composure!

Five in a FUCKING ROW!

EU vs. FU! the 'BULLSIT-O-METER' is PEGGING NEGATIVE! The BOVINE LURCH 'KERRY'! Obamonkey 'LAIKA'-dog! PLEASE tell me that ALGORE will be up next, explaining the issues regarding 'bovine excrements' and the reason for a 'CARBON TAX'! DEARTH in the BALANCE! COW-FARTS ADD to the 'GLOBAL FOOTPRINT'! SNOW (jobs) are a THING OF THE PAST!

Holy SHI-ITE!

Too (really fracking) GOOD!

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 20:49 | 5169467 nmewn
nmewn's picture

OT:

"The fee for individuals to renounce U.S. citizenship is jumping to $2,350 as of Sept. 12—more than five times the current charge of $450.

The U.S. State Department, in its explanation for the increase, said that documenting a renunciation is “extremely costly” and requires a minimum of two intensive interviews with the applicant as well as other procedures."

(lol...right up there with searching IRS .gov databases by IP address, no doubt)

"The fees charged for a number of other services, such as “fiance(e) visas” and employment-based visa applications,  increased far less than those for renunciation and in some cases declined.

The large increase in the renunciation fee comes at a time when record numbers of Americans living abroad are cutting ties with the U.S. Last year, 2,999 U.S. citizens and green-card holders renounced their allegiance to the U.S., a record number, and renunciations in 2014 are on track to exceed that. The State Department estimates that 7.6 million Americans live abroad."
http://blogs.wsj.com/totalreturn/2014/08/30/government-fee-to-give-up-u-s-citizenship-is-raised-fivefold/

John Kerry could not be reached for comment on whether just tossing them over the WH fence would suffice ;-)

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 10:17 | 5170887 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

So free, you can't leave.

An American, not US subject.

 

"My guillotine is fee free for pols, crats and banksters."

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:06 | 5169513 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

They can't understand why anyone would renounce, so they have to charge a higher fee to make sure you can afford to live without Obamacare.

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 23:41 | 5169977 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

You

Will

NOT

RENOUNCE!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1sf2CzEq0w

So let it be written; So let it be done!

(Barry Soetoro, penned from the Thirteenth hole)

Those people; those who 'renounce'; are merely 'conspiracy theorists'. Members of 'hate groups' and members of other 'domestic threat' terrorism groups are truly misled. WE are not your enemies; We are leading you on the path to a greater good for the masses! Those who espouse 'gun rights' and the 'constitution' and 'sovereignty'; wherever 'they' may be, are poor and lost souls who deserve NOTHING short of all the resources we can bring to bear in this epic and timeless struggle of evil versus 'good'. WE will lead you on the path; the Garden path. The thousand points of light that we; the Illuminated Ones; simply and honestly attempt to bring to you (the sheoples) are NOT evil. YEA, they are the ONLY path left! If you want to live, take our hand!

"I have been authorized to assure you that so far, there is NO, REASONABLE, CAUSE for 'alarm'". Go back to sleep, America. your government is in control, once again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTFVMMCwsss

(HINT: It's not 'Bill Hicks')

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 21:17 | 5169552 nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol...yes...amazing how they can determine (in their infinite wisdom) what someone can afford to live with.

Or without ;-)

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 22:01 | 5169711 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

"One does not simply renounce citizenship!  A peasant to the Empire is a peasant for life!  What sort of precedent will this set?  Upon renouncing citizenship, nude selfies of said individiual will be leaked."

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 22:10 | 5169733 nmewn
nmewn's picture

And tweeted.

#StasiStyle ;-)

Tue, 09/02/2014 - 23:00 | 5174150 Rusty Shorts
Mon, 09/01/2014 - 20:05 | 5169373 I_Am_
I_Am_'s picture

good morning...the news doesn't break and the wb7 pen is already at work....take them apart. awesome. gasnost indeed.

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 20:04 | 5169371 Cycle
Cycle's picture

I smell a gas trick euructation!  Most excellent!

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 19:36 | 5169290 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 09/01/2014 - 23:16 | 5169926 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

Don't mind him.

He's simply searching for a banana.

Every outfit comes complete with a can of Vienna sausages (and a customized blue glove).

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