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Everything That's Wrong With Banking Summed Up In One Bonehead Advertisement

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Submitted by Simon Black via Sovereign Man blog,

If you’re looking around right now for a new bank account that pays a reasonable rate of return, ANZ bank has a hell of a deal for you: 0%!

That’s right. ANZ is offering its depositors absolutely zero interest.

 

Now, a bank paying 0% isn’t exactly abnormal in today’s banking environment. But what’s really strange is that ANZ actually took out an ad in an Australian newspaper to advertise this.

Yesterday’s page 10 of the Australian Financial Review (AFR) had a quarter-page ad from ANZ boasting about 0% interest rates for accounts denominated in number of foreign currencies, including Hong Kong dollars, Japanese yen, British pounds, and more.

Curiously, in order to qualify for this bargain 0% rate, you have to meet a rather significant deposit minimum.

For the 0% Japanese yen account, for example, you have to deposit 23.5 million yen (currently about $223,000 US dollars).

So basically some manager at ANZ actually thought that paying 0% interest on substantial account minimums would be an attractive offer… so attractive, in fact, that they should brag about it in the newspaper.

This is so completely ridiculous. But it really crystalizes what’s wrong with the entire financial system.

We’re told to keep our money in banks… that banks are safe. But the objective data tells a completely different story.

Holding money in most banks guarantees that you will lose money.

Adjusting for taxes and inflation, you’re losing at least 2% per year, even if you believe the governments’ notoriously understated official inflation statistics.

This level of absurdity pushes people into riskier and riskier assets, simply in an effort to avoid LOSING money.

Case in point - the government of Spain recently issued 1 BILLION euros worth of bonds that yield a paltry 4%. And they’re due in 2064.

Bear in mind, Spain is completely broke. And just two years ago the government had to pay 7.5% on ten year notes.

Now people are lending money to the Spanish government for 50 freaking years at just 4%.

This is insane.

But couldn’t this insanity last forever? Couldn’t the grand wizards of the financial system continue to engineer one deranged bailout after another for decades to come?

Possibly. But unlikely.

Right now the US dollar is the world’s dominant reserve currency. This gives the United States nearly total control of the global financial system.

In order to clear cross-border trade transactions, foreign banks HAVE to use the US banking system (which is controlled by the US government).

Further, rest of the world must essentially mirror US Federal Reserve policy.

But this power… and insanity… only lasts as long as the US dollar is the dominant reserve currency. And this is starting to change rapidly.

China’s renminbi is becoming much more widely accepted around the world for trade settlement; a number of foreign governments are now holding renminbi reserves and doing deals to promote trade in renminbi.

Even in the United States, renminbi payment business increased 327% last year, and the US is now the fifth largest offshore renminbi settlement center.

It’s no secret here, this is happening right under our noses. The financial system IS changing.

People who ignore this trend do so at their own financial peril.

Yet those who understand what’s happening and align themselves accordingly stand to make fortunes.

The Weimar Republic’s episode with hyperinflation in the 1920s is a great example.

Despite all the warning signs, most people did nothing… and they got wiped out.

A handful of people, though, saw the writing on the wall. They took steps to safeguard what they had. And they allocated their investment capital to bet that the currency would collapse.

They were right. And vast fortunes were created in a matter of months.

Throughout history there’s always a handful of people ahead of the trend. And they’re rewarded for their foresight.

Right now we’re in the very early stages of a similar transition– arguably one of the most important economic transformations since the Industrial Revolution.

Because of this, opportunities already abound if you know where to look. It’s an incredibly exciting time to be alive.

 

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Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:27 | 5185389 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

Better than the ECB, who actually CHARGES the banks to keep money with them! 

ECB still has the audacity to call it a 'deposit rate' http://online.wsj.com/articles/ecb-cuts-interest-rates-in-surprise-move-...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:33 | 5185434 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Don't worry Simon, IMF will come to the "rescue" with SDRs.

There's absolutely no way they will let this accumulated debt unwind in a deflationary spiral, as it undoes a century of "hard work." Instead, it will ALL be used to back whatever they'll call the next global currency.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:38 | 5185454 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

Banks are now paying for this privilege to keep money with various Central banks in the Eurozone, in the end customers will end up paying somehow, as always.

Fees are rising everywhere instead of interest rates.

Fees have been implemented for depositing money for business accounts....for taking out money at a branch....Fees for manager's check cancellation....fee for non maintenance of balances...fees for everything.

Any stories to share on the rising fees around the world that you may have personally felt in the last year or two ever since the zero / negative rates began?

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:45 | 5185494 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Sure, business accounts of $25,000 generating $10 of interest in a month, subject to monthly $120 in 'bank fees' (an account with little or no tx).

Equals??? 

Income: $10

Expense: $120

(Monthly) Net Loss: $110 for holding money in a bank account!

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:30 | 5186011 J S Bach
J S Bach's picture

Throughout history there’s always a handful of people ahead of the trend. And they’re rewarded for their foresight.

Right now we’re in the very early stages of a similar transition– arguably one of the most important economic transformations since the Industrial Revolution.

Because of this, opportunities already abound if you know where to look. It’s an incredibly exciting time to be alive.

 

This is all so true... and the change is going to come at lightning speed.  I just don't feel as greedily gleeful about it as this writer does.  So many people are going to suffer.  Yes, it's basically their fault for being live-for-today grasshoppers, but they are purposely being mislead and misinformed by TPTB.  When it all pans out, the perpetrators of this evil system have to be brought to justice.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 17:15 | 5186488 SeattleBruce
SeattleBruce's picture

"I just don't feel as greedily gleeful about it as this writer does."  Totally agree. 

"It’s an incredibly exciting time to be alive." - and for all the rest it's really going to suck!

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:06 | 5187485 Squid-puppets a...
Squid-puppets a-go-go's picture

and the herd arent piling into gold yet because...why ?

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 01:17 | 5187690 PT
PT's picture

How to manipulate the price of physical gold:
1.  Sell gold.
2.  Steal gold.
3.  Go to step 1.

errr, step 1.5:  Invent reason why the gold must be stolen, or at least why a war must be declared and then you steal the gold while no-one is looking.  Sell gold to your enemies???  In exchange for gas and oil???

Umm, but yeah, your question is still a good one.

Ooohhh, that's right.  Step ... 4?  Step 1.75?  :  Bankrupt the people and open up a large chain of gold buying stores.  (Visit a pawn broker and find out how much they pay for jewellery from desperate people.)

Apart from that, your question still stands.  I agree with you.  Not complaining, just observing.  Hedge accordingly.

Why would they listen to me?  They have nice things.  I don't.  The end.

(and yet somehow I still prefer to live my way, not "their way").

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:57 | 5187569 PT
PT's picture

HAHAHAHAHA...

Sorry guys, this article is soooo ... APPROPRIATE!  I really wish yous all knew as much about ANZ as me, in fact I wish you knew ten times more because I have forgotten a lot over the years and I wish you knew even more than that.  Suffice to say, that when new fees and other shenanigans were being invented and introduced, ANZ was manning the helm or not far from it.  I never banked with them and I never understood why anyone else did.  I still don't understand it.  Then again, given that Australian banking is dominated by the Big FOUR, I guess none of them are far from the helm.  Still, ANZ and this ad on ZH.  Of course it had to be ANZ.  That's just the way it works over here.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 06:41 | 5187877 Captain Obvious.
Captain Obvious.'s picture

Umm that sounds about right. The ANZ is my bank and if there was ever an economic weather vane I am it.

I should charge millions to speak.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 06:58 | 5187885 PT
PT's picture

But why do you still bank with them?  To me, they always seemed to be the worst, or the first with the worst.  Habit?  Did they ever give you some kind of good deal?  Because they may be first with the worst but it doesn't take long for the rest to catch up with them?  Or is my perception wrong?

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:01 | 5187581 PT
PT's picture

I've had negative banking for over 20 years - i.e. fees > interest.  Still haven't worked out how to bypass the fuckers and get paid in cash.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 02:32 | 5187767 LostandFound
LostandFound's picture

Yep, AED 150 dirham for sending money to an international account to pay my mortgage, thats on top of a shitty exchange rate.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 02:58 | 5187778 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

AED 150 is high but not THAT high. Many banks charge USD 50 to USD 75 minimum in UAE as well as Singapore/Switzerland etc. There was a time when we could get away with paying AED 25 for transfers within Dubai and AED 50 outside UAE. 

Have you considered asking your receiving bank if you sent money from an exchange house who also does background checks and takes an ID before sending a remittance, as per UAE central bank rules, if they will accept?

Not only will you get a better exchange rate than a bank but pay a far lower fee for remittance due to the competition. Only trick is that the foreign bank must accept the remittance and it will take you 1 trip from the bank - to withdraw cash - and next stop at the exchange house to remit the funds.

Hope this helps.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 03:05 | 5187781 LostandFound
LostandFound's picture

Thanks for the advice, will check it out.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 04:06 | 5187805 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

You could actually send a small amount of say GBP 500 or USD 500 and see how it goes...and then use it for larger amounts.....if the receiving bank rejects it,...then you would know.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 03:06 | 5187783 LostandFound
LostandFound's picture

By the way, are you buying gold and silver in Dubai? if so, where would you recommend?

I am buying from gold and diamond park, but struggling to find silver coins, they only sell 1kg bars.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 04:05 | 5187803 Dubaibanker
Dubaibanker's picture

Yep...Been buying gold in small bars of 116 gms each called 'Tola' bars...apparently, they are easier to sell...they should cost now around 17k dirhams each. Even kilo bars are available. You could also call and check this shop named 'Lakhoos' in Deira. He is one of the biggest wholesalers in Dubai and the region. You should get everything in Deira's gold souk inlcuding silver coins. The trick is to find parking. Lol. Another one in Bur Dubai is Khushi whom also please call before going anywhere.

Another place to buy gold, alongwith gold certificates, is ENBD bank and you may also check with any of the banks that you bank with.

I prefer gold over silver. For all the noise in the world, silver is still an industrial metal and not much of an investment holding vehicle unlike gold which IMHO is more of a 'precious' metal and a popular one at that.

Just one tip, based on experience, do hold on securely to the purchase receipt without which you may find it very difficult to sell the gold.

Sun, 09/07/2014 - 03:50 | 5189980 LostandFound
LostandFound's picture

Top man, thanks

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:41 | 5185474 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Can't wait for silver to equal ~20 <insert new currency unit> and gold to equal ~1300 <insert new currency unit>.

We can all be rich, bitchez!!!

/sarc

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:06 | 5185598 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Having the purchasing power you have now will be "rich" in the aftermath. "In the Kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is King".

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:41 | 5185475 Mercuryquicksilver
Mercuryquicksilver's picture

Not to spoil anyones alarmist fun, but perhaps ANZ must publish rate changes in order to notify existing account holders that returns are no longer per contract. Maybe this is a notification in a public newspaper with large readership and not an advertisement.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:49 | 5185514 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

Perhaps all those Hunnits under the bed (cash external to the system) will be declared null and void. 

 That would be funny.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:18 | 5185666 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

NP (No Problem, 'Nema Problema').  Two-step solution:

1. You keep a nominal Chequeing/Checking Account at the bank, where you get Paycheck (or any regular Deposit) auto-deposited.  This avoids fees being charged to the account, and lets you remain a tiny part of the System (the Visible Economy and M2) -- for purposes of paying taxes, utility bills, etc.  Use cheques/checks and/or Debit card to pay for stuff.

You may also have a 'Savings' account, to provide quick and convenient Overdraft protection, and keep it free of fees if the balance is kept above a nominal minimum ($500-1500, depending on the bank).

Alternatively, use a Community Co-Op or Credit Union, to avoid Fees.  But don't expect to get better interest rates than from a bank.  0.2% is not really better than 0.1%.  Not when your real inflation is 2-20%, depending on the item.

2. You keep the bulk of your Cash at the "Bank of Serta, Sealy and Posturepedic".  No fees, no nosy questions, no outing to Big Bro/Ho (via electronic trail and records) or potential litigators, no daily withdrawal limits.  Open 24/7.  Can keep multiple accounts in any denomination you like, as well as a Bullion Account.  Note:  You may have to use your very own Security System to safeguard this bank, but the associated costs are rather nominal when compared to the costs at a regular bank.

p.s. I'd like to tell you to keep a bunch of cash overseas (can't trust Canadian banks anymore either - not with Harper in charge), but then I'd be educating/informing the goddam ZH trolls and their bosses.  I can imagine Simon advising you to do so -- and he has done so in the past -- but most of the places that he has recommended have fallen under Obama's "Extended NATO umbrella" as of 9/5/2014 (e.g. Baltic states, Ukraine, Georgia) or under the FATCA umbrella (Central and S. America, Hong Kong, Singapore).  His "front-running" doesn't seem to last long, as TPTB simply pay for his Subscription and use his Info/Advice to close loopholes and places to hide.  A "Newsletter" clearly has a very limited shelf-life in its Advice.

p.p.s. If, IF I were to keep any cash overseas, I'd keep some nominal amount in an account and a larger part in a Safety Deposit Box as cash (and a few AU coins mixed in).  Since "Gold is not money" (per the Fed/Bernanke) and cash yields no Income that can be taxed, there is (to my knowledge) no requirement that citizens "declare" what they do with their Cash or where they store it.  But the number of people who could and actually would do this, is rather 'limited' (not a mass-market solution), and hence the overall amount would also be rather 'limited' in the eyes of TPTB.  Those people who are millionaires or billionaires have "sweetheart" deals with the Gov anyway -- don't you kid yourself.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:47 | 5185803 SumTing Wong
SumTing Wong's picture

Since gold is not money, but they do ask if you are carrying more than $10,000 worth of money...my wife and each of my four daughters have some beautiful jewelry that has gold and diamonds. They even have gold necklaces with a setting in the middle for an ounce gold coin. I've got a couple of rolls of those awful Presidential dollars, plus some twonies and some euro coins, and it is amazing how a half ounce gold coin or two can find its way into those coins without being recognized as all that different. (I've tested this with TSA when getting onto planes.)

When you hide things out in the open, it shocks people and they miss it. 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:24 | 5185989 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

:-)  Cool.  I've tried similar things before, but on a smaller and test-trial case.  For my own education/insurance, and was not going to share publicly.

Do you remember the signs at the park that say "Don't feed the ducks"?   Well, it's similar here on ZH:  "Don't feed the Gov Trolls".  ;-)

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 17:20 | 5186510 SeattleBruce
SeattleBruce's picture

Seems to me you might be able to work something out in country - if you're traveling anyway...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:54 | 5186139 Dadburnitpa
Dadburnitpa's picture

Well, yeah but the 0% is COMPOUNDED **DAILY**.  So there's that.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 12:45 | 5188355 de Cosmos
de Cosmos's picture

And, then there will be new money from the Interplanetary Monetary Fund, then the Interstellar Monetary Fund, the Galactic Monetary Fund, the Intergalactic Monetary Fund, the Universal Monetary fund, the Parallel-Universes Monetary funds, the Cosmic Monetary Fund, the Quantum Monetary Fund, the Dark Matter Monetary Fund, the Dark Energy Monetary Fund, the Existential Mystery Monetary Fund, the Perpetual Motion Monetary Fund... none of which has any real money at all.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185398 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

the government of Spain recently issued 1 BILLION euros worth of bonds that yield a paltry 4%. And they’re due in 2064.

Spain will no longer be Spain be then - broken into several pieces.

Human stupidity is infinite - matched only by misplaced human optimism.

Yes, Obama, the CIA figurehead (his first job was working for the CIA),  will solve everything

0% yield is so attractive only because it matches your IQ.


Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185421 JRobby
JRobby's picture

Good observation

The USSA will also be split into several nations by then if things change.

If they remain the way they are currently going, it will be a one nation global police state.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:50 | 5185530 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

The USSA will also be split into 'FEMA Regions'. 

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:19 | 5187608 PT
PT's picture

http://books.google.com.au/books/about/One_Man_Banned.html?id=h4jIAAAACAAJ

If I remember rightly, written in 1994, Peter Sawyer said that within a decade the US would no longer be a nation.  (Unfortunately it was just a quick note near the end of the book with no explanation).  Okay, so he was wrong.  But I think we can agree that he was on the right track.  I'd love to know what he knew that led him to that conclusion back then.  He also foresaw an incident that would lead to the Australian govt confiscating guns.  Didn't happen the way he envisaged it but we had the Port Arthur massacre and then the end result was the same.

He first entered the public eye with a book called, "Dole Bludging, a Tax Payers Guide".  (He worked for the dole office and tried to eliminate some scamming.  Reporting to his superiors didn't work so he eventually wrote a book.)  I never got to read that book but it's on my wish list.  Try looking for it.  You'll quickly find the "edge of the internet".

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:38 | 5185455 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Probably all of us should just print out that header about the Spanish Bonds and put it on the wall behind our computer monitors, so we can look at it every day. It's a good way to sum up the stage of the madness we're in now. Of course, most of this money is "other peoples money". Like when your investment adviser calls you up to tell you he just got you a "perfectly safe" 4% return on your retirement money; "Oh, thank you Mr. Adviser; you're such a wise man". Gonna be some really unhappy people out there in investment land.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:28 | 5185403 Moustache Rides
Moustache Rides's picture

I don't understand how a bank can do this.  When you deposit money in a bank you are loaning it to them.  That's why interest gets generated.  The loan is also why banks can then make loans to other people becuase your money has become their money because you loaned it to them.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:32 | 5185427 JRobby
JRobby's picture

Stay tuned

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:42 | 5185487 Alea Iactaest
Alea Iactaest's picture

Yes, it becomes "their" money.

Yes, the risk is all yours.

Yes, you have to be mentally deficient to think keeping your money in the bank with NO return and substantial (potential) risk is a good idea.

Act accordingly, you evil hoarders.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:34 | 5185443 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Banks used to loan real money, which was scarce. Today? They loan debt-money, and have no need for your deposits, except for window dressing.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:45 | 5185499 seek
seek's picture

And every other bank is doing the exact same thing, so there's no competition for your deposits (though there is for fees, it appears.)

No competition = no need to have higher rates as well.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:52 | 5185535 Hacked Economy
Hacked Economy's picture

Moustache, this is incorrect, although it's the way most people (including me when I was taught finances at a younger age) view the banking system.

In actuality, you are not loaning money to the bank, but enjoining yourself by purchasing shares.  Read the fine print in any Bank or Credit Union application, and you'll see this.  This is the basis for the "bail-in" mindset that was exercised in Cyprus and has been explored by larger U.S. banks...if the institution needs capitalization to balance its books and remain solvent, then the money in "your" account is available for that purpose.  Remember, in a legally-binding agreement you have with your bank, you have a vested interest in keeping the bank solvent because you own "shares" in it.  The bank is therefore not legally stealing from you, but simply acting in the best interests of the corporation.

Ethically, it's horrible.  But legally it's all clear.  Keep this in mind and do as many others do...divide your money up between physical cash outside the system and multiple banks and/or credit unions inside it.  It's a moderate hedge against an unexpected bail-in against your money.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:27 | 5185701 Moustache Rides
Moustache Rides's picture

That's just heinous.  Thanks for the clarification

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 19:50 | 5186985 Hacked Economy
Hacked Economy's picture

After following ZH for 3+ years, I'm very surprised (and disappointed?) that nobody else here provided the clarification.  Surely more ZH'ers here are aware of this truth about banks, yes?  (please say yes, and don't call me Shirley...)

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:38 | 5187631 PT
PT's picture

I also thanks for the clarification.  Much better than all I knew.  I would have just pointed out that the banks do what the banks do because they keep getting away with it.  All my banking is done under duress.  If I don't have direct deposit then I can't get a job (can't claim the dole either).  No job then I starve to death.  No access to toilets and showers and I can't look clean, neat, tidy and employable.

It's a legalised extortion racket and they twist the screws whenever they feel like it.  Followed by the "You deserve it because it's all your fault" speech.  The supreme arrogance of the all powerful.

Moustache Rides :  Sounds like you need a little more education.
"Liars Poker" by Michael Lewis
"The Big Short (Inside The Doomsday Machine)" by Michael Lewis

Just a couple of fun little books that should help you get up to speed.  No doubt others can also recommend other books or essays.  I keep falling back to those two, not just for the information but for the fun factor in delivering that information.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 01:28 | 5187709 Dame Ednas Possum
Dame Ednas Possum's picture

...or stack bullion and then go boating.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:16 | 5185953 Id fight Gandhi
Id fight Gandhi's picture

The banking system is purposely nebulous.

But to be clear : loans create deposits

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 01:01 | 5187657 PT
PT's picture

... and thanks to direct deposit and Electronic Funds Transfer, the banks have close to 100% of the money 100% of the time.  Let that one sink in for a bit.

P.S.  And they STILL "need" to be "bailed out"!

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 08:14 | 5187916 Singelguy
Singelguy's picture

That is the way it USED to work. The banks now borrow from the central banks for 0% interest, invest it in the stock market, or buy back stock, or play the currency and derivative markets. They don't need the depositors anymore.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185408 Grande Tetons
Grande Tetons's picture

So, you are saying I get nothing and take all the risk? 

Awesome. Maybe, I can store my PMs with you cats at the same time. 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:39 | 5185464 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

I'm sure they'd be glad to help you out; for a reasonable fee, of course.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:52 | 5185840 SumTing Wong
SumTing Wong's picture

I have a free safe deposit box with my account, and I do keep a roll of Canadian silver quarters and a 1/10 ounce US gold piece in there. Unfortunately that is all that is left from a horrible canoe accident. And when they come to confiscate, they will have an easier time confiscating from me. It's all in the safety deposit box, every last sliver of precious metals I have. I hope it all works out okay for me and no gangsters come in and steal my precious at the bank. 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:32 | 5185411 ejmoosa
ejmoosa's picture

If it doesnt' cost much to borrow theirs and it costs nothing to borrow yours, then whatever it is must be worthless.

 

How much is it to borrow someone elses' gold?

You can't have mine at any price.

 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:42 | 5185480 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Now that's a very interesting way to look at it. That seems to shine some light on this whole process, alright. If it costs nothing to borrow it, It must be worthless; hmmm. I think I'll start remembering that every day.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:50 | 5185513 seek
seek's picture

How much is it to borrow someone elses' gold?

http://www.kitco.com/lease.chart.html

Check out silver lease rates for amusement.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:04 | 5185585 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Yes, indeed; t hat's the other half of the story.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185412 angel_of_joy
angel_of_joy's picture

I'm sure there is a long line of depositors waiting in the wings... somewhere...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:39 | 5185459 ThirdWorldDude
ThirdWorldDude's picture

Depositors on the sidelines... itching to go all in.

L.O.L.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:47 | 5187642 PT
PT's picture

I don't understand what is so funny.  I hear there is a new depositor born every minute.

http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/1994-09-18/

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185415 Bell's 2 hearted
Bell&#039;s 2 hearted's picture

they can have my money (whats left) ... as long as they have plenty of dum dums on hand ... and 20yr old hottie tellers.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:31 | 5185416 irie1029
irie1029's picture

This from Bloomberg is exactly parallel:

U.S. Stocks Rise as High-Yield Shares Gain Amid Jobs Data

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:33 | 5185432 cpnscarlet
cpnscarlet's picture

Bullets or lollipops????

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:32 | 5185422 cpnscarlet
cpnscarlet's picture

Gold is only 1267. There is ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with the global financial system. Objectively, the fiat money system is 30% better than it was during August of 2011.

 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:33 | 5185430 Moe Hamhead
Moe Hamhead's picture

but at least your money is safe in a bank...

/right!

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:37 | 5185446 Overflow-admin
Overflow-admin's picture
Secret Trade in Services Agreement (TISA) - Financial Services Annex 2014-06-19

Today, WikiLeaks released the secret draft text for the Trade in Services Agreement (TISA) Financial Services Annex, which covers 50 countries and 68.2%1 of world trade in services. The US and the EU are the main proponents of the agreement, and the authors of most joint changes, which also covers cross-border data flow. In a significant anti-transparency manoeuvre by the parties, the draft has been classified to keep it secret not just during the negotiations but for five years after the TISA enters into force.

https://wikileaks.org/tisa-financial/

THEY ARE JUST SO DESPERATE.

Edit: a bit OT, but not that much...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:52 | 5185532 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

This is a By Rothschild, For Rothschild agreement: "proponents of TISA aim to further deregulate global financial services markets. The draft Financial Services Annex sets rules which would assist the expansion of financial multi-nationals – mainly headquartered in New York, London, Paris and Frankfurt – into other nations by preventing regulatory barriers."

"Mayer Amschel, founder of the Rothschild banking dynasty, ... In the early 1800s, sent his five sons to establish bases in London, Paris... in addition to Frankfurt" (Frankfurt was the initial HQ, their influence on Wall St came later with the rise of 'Morgan' and 'Rockefeller')

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:59 | 5185568 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Thanks for the link, and the post. the Bastards continue in their mad rush to world domination and control.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:16 | 5185947 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

So, with Frankfurt and Paris linked to London and NY, the French and Germans are being told (in effect) that they will make more money and enjoy a better lifestyle if their link to the Eurasian Silk Road 2.0 includes and is "directed" by London and NY.

OIW:  "You're either with US or again' US".  That's my "takeaway". 

And, when they (TPTB) frame/put it that way, I can see why Holland is such a French 'Chicken Little', and why Merkel is cow-towing to them.  The former likes to strut & posture, but will squawk and stay on the "Range", and the latter will nod in her customary German obedience to authority (Obrigkeitsbewust). 

Putin should have NO illusions or allow himself to be fooled that the Germans (Merkel) will be a "genuine European" -- not when so many (50k) Amis are still occupying Germany and spying on her 24/7/365, and the Fed has Draghi and the ECB in its pocket.  After Obama's post-NATO statements, it is clear that NATO's march will continue in MENA and on its borders, and that a Full Economic, Political War and Propaganda War is in effect. 

They have Putin in their cross-hairs, and they will NOT relent, cease or desist (other than for brief tactical reasons), until they will have weakened Russia enough in their Full-Spectrum-Dominance (FSD) efforts to cause Regime Change in Russia.  They want nothing less than a "Boris Yelstsin 2.0", who will allow the rise of Russian Ziocons.  Period.  Ponyemayesh?

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:37 | 5185449 maneco
maneco's picture

At least the rates are not negative like in the Eurozone.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:47 | 5185511 JRobby
JRobby's picture

They aren't?

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:42 | 5186082 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Yes, bullish.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:41 | 5185473 game theory
game theory's picture

This is rubbish.   Whom is telling people to keep their money in banks?   What rational person listens to advice like that?

These rates should be even lower than zero: stop complaining. 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:05 | 5185596 Bell's 2 hearted
Bell&#039;s 2 hearted's picture

i guess the bet is on china ... if they have hard landing ... i wouldn't wanna be near the aud ... and at negative rate?

 

no thanks

 

http://www.xe.com/currencycharts/?from=USD&to=AUD&view=5Y

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:42 | 5185482 random999
random999's picture

"A handful of people, though, saw the writing on the wall. They took steps to safeguard what they had. And they allocated their investment capital to bet that the currency would collapse.

They were right. And vast fortunes were created in a matter of months.

Throughout history there’s always a handful of people ahead of the trend. And they’re rewarded for their foresight."

So.. any ideas what to do? I´ve worked to lower my exposure towards fiat for a year now, but I still havent found anything that feels right.

got a little stocks even if they are at ATH, some metals, tools, guns etc.. any good ideas how i could invest the rest of my fiat?

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:48 | 5185505 Alea Iactaest
Alea Iactaest's picture

Simon says...

 

 

 

... buy my newsletter, hire me to get new citizenship, runaway from wherever you call home, settle near my ranch in South America, trust me 'cause I'm only trying to help you.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:49 | 5185821 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Ok, so he's catering to a Niche Market with his info and services.  Big deal.  If this does not work for YOU, this is an "issue"... how?

Other than "dissing" the guy, I'm not clear on... What value-add point are you making, or trying to make.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 18:39 | 5186751 Alea Iactaest
Alea Iactaest's picture

Was I dissing? For pointing out what Simon says? The guy asked what he should do and I simply gave him Simon's line.

Fuck off if that's a problem. And I mean that nicely, since I'm usually ok with your posts.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:48 | 5185516 Bell's 2 hearted
Bell&#039;s 2 hearted's picture

hookers, blow ... and good beer

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:50 | 5185523 JRobby
JRobby's picture

Paid for shelter

Stock piles of weapons, ammo, provisions and barter-able goods.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:57 | 5185556 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

Russian bride, just in case 'they' win.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:50 | 5185822 JRobby
JRobby's picture

Wise policy. She will likely sell your ass down the road (better learn to speak Russian) and take off with the Colonel.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:01 | 5185576 seek
seek's picture

When Weimar imploded, the people that made fortunes held PMs or tangible property and not paper, and traded the PMs primarily for real estate and businesses at exactly the right time.

Something I think a lot of people miss when they talk about Weimar fortunes is 1) the timing (seriously, you don't know how much worse things might get) and 2) the rule of law (contracts to buy property under insanely disadvantageous circumstances were upheld). Remember Weimar didn't collapse, it almost collapsed, and that was the key to all these crazy stories of people taking out loans and buying real goods and then paying the loan off for nothing. It's relatively easy to imagine the same thing happening today but with a bank-backed congress passing a law unilaterally negotiating loan payoffs in a new currency such that it costs the mortgagee more than it would have before the collapse.

It's a very dangerous presumption to think that can be repeated when Weimar 2.0 hits.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:08 | 5185612 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

'crazy stories'

 

I wonder how many are true.

 

 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:18 | 5185663 seek
seek's picture

Quite a few. This little except gives some background: http://history.hanover.edu/courses/excerpts/111heil.html

The scary thing in reading that, you realize that while the small players had these stories, the very large moneyed players gained the most (sound familiar?) and there was growing inequity (sound familiar?)... and then what happens next...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:51 | 5185825 JRobby
JRobby's picture

All

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:01 | 5185577 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Silver Bullion. The odds are enormously in your favor. Get rid of the stocks; it's not rational to have money in anything that's overpriced.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:11 | 5185628 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

Second vote for silver - you can smelt bullets. 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:50 | 5185525 Farmer Joe in B...
Farmer Joe in Brooklyn's picture

"It’s an incredibly exciting time to be alive."

If you think about it, we likely are watching one of the most critical stages in american history unfold before our eyes.  If you play the cards right, you'll definitely be able to weather the storm enough to enjoy the thunder and lightning.

No matter how well-positioned, we're all going to have to take some medicine.  I just like my chances way better than most....

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:51 | 5185838 JRobby
JRobby's picture

I agree.

Of course I will end up in a camp for frequenting this board................

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:55 | 5185550 homiegot
homiegot's picture

Goose eggs

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 13:58 | 5185564 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Thought we we were at war. Nobody's expecting the enemy to pay them are they?

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:01 | 5185571 CHX
CHX's picture

I save yellow and shiny. No interest either, but that's ok.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:08 | 5185609 BiPolarFrenchman
BiPolarFrenchman's picture

Most likely it's a dynamic ads that's supposed to refresh the interest rates, and someone fucked up the code.  

 

If not, LOL

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:13 | 5185641 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture

There goes the Bitcoin - Mass power outage in Egypt halts..

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:32 | 5185721 TVP
TVP's picture

Okay, so go somewhere with electricity and internet...

 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:15 | 5185651 Farside
Farside's picture

Check out their lending rates:

http://www.anz.com/aus/RateFee/InterestRates/Rates.asp

pretty sweet gig they have there.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:17 | 5185659 CheapBastard
CheapBastard's picture

I guess they cant bash the yellow metal any more about not yielding any interest. At least you have the return of your yellow metal at the end of your investment period as opposed to losing 40% in a Bank Bail-in.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:28 | 5185699 TVP
TVP's picture

None will be allowed to make their fortunes this time around.  

Through war, confiscation, taxation, terrorist attacks, fraud and manipulation, famine, pandemics....

It's kind of hard to think about your finances when your main concern becomes where to get your next meal, and how to avoid being blown up.

We've already seen a small example of this in precious metals manipulation....prices were going through the stratosphere, indicating fiat was collapsing....how did that one work out??

There remains no where to run, no where to hide, no safe haven for one's money.  Tangible assets, sure, but everything you think you own belongs to the government in time of crisis, remember that...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:33 | 5185736 potato
potato's picture

Seriously, it's time all individuals kept only next three month's payables in the bank. Starve the beast. Don't keep any money in banks in excess of what's convenient for your recurring bills. Stop paying credit cards and only use cash. 

Buying a car? You probably don't need to spend more than $10k so pay cash.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:34 | 5187524 falconflight
falconflight's picture

We are pushing hard to complete more transactions with cash, gasoline and groceries especially and writing checks for utilities and the mortgage.  Slows down the whole digital world for the fed/treasury.  We used to pay everything via the Internet or with plastic.  No smart phones, and a foreseeable termination of cable/satellite services.  I won't give up the ISP voluntarily. No more new vehicles with their Dem/GOP mandated blackboxes.  Just won't do it.   Any credit card use is for convenience and the ability to dispute purchases after the fact.  Any large purchases on credit, i.e.appliances are already scheduled for maximum payments clearing the debt with a couple of cycles...again closing off the fractional banking scheme and again slowing our leaders receipt of economic activity.

What else can I do that's peaceful, at least so far such actions aren't being attacked beyond  being called "hoarders" by the Fed?  I pay for services renders often for cash, and where that isn't practical, the service person is getting a bonus from me that he can decide whether its anyone else's business.  

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:41 | 5185781 ajax
ajax's picture

 

 

REPEAL FATCA

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:44 | 5185789 RisingSun
RisingSun's picture

That is for foreign currency, cant find any info on their website, however AU $ they have 3.3% for 12 months and 4.30% in NZ:

 

https://www.anz.com/personal/bank-accounts/term-deposits/#C

 

http://www.anz.co.nz/ratefee/Interest.asp?section=PTDNZ#PTDNZ

 

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 15:38 | 5186057 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

I would NOT keep any significant amount in any of the 5 Eyes* banks anyway.  Or in any bank.  Not in the light of the crony capitalism and fascism that we've seen in the US and its Western minions in the last 13 years.

For the money that is in a bank, I can get better rates (4.5% - 8.5%) at banks outside the obvious places -- at acceptable risk/security.  Obviously I'm not going to share that info.

* Five Eyes = US, UK, Canada, Australia, New Zealand - a special political and MIC alliance between these English-speaking countries.  Note that 4 are former English colonies, but all are now financial colonies of the US Fed and its (secret) owners.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:52 | 5185846 JuliaS
JuliaS's picture

This reminds me of Louis CK standup piece:

- You bought a movie ticket? Now get the fuck outta here!

- But I paid for the movie!

- No! You paid for the ticket, motherfucker!

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 14:55 | 5185870 Sandmann
Sandmann's picture

Citibank in Europe has ceased straight bilateral currency conversions instead referencing everything through bilaterals with US Dollar.......must be trying to hold up demand

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 16:38 | 5186352 Duffy
Duffy's picture

Study, ye, the bamboo network, friends...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bamboo_network

 

And employ it wherein ye can.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 17:36 | 5186554 Savvy
Savvy's picture

Not so long ago at another forum this discussion came up. One member said he tried to show his daughter the value of saving money so put $500 into an account with Chase. After one year of no deposits and no withdrawals the savings account held $380. LOL!

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 18:01 | 5186621 cart00ner
cart00ner's picture

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 20:06 | 5187033 blindman
blindman's picture

"There must be a God. Otherwise people would have no one who loved them." jca
.
http://jessescrossroadscafe.blogspot.com/2014/09/sp-500-and-ndx-futures-...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 22:57 | 5187473 The Shape
The Shape's picture

This ain't as dumb as it seems. I note there's no USD option there, but they'd probably have one and when the AUD tanks, as it will, you'll cream 30% off the top.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:03 | 5187483 falconflight
falconflight's picture

Just remember that our deposits are debts and we should be thankful that they aren't charging us interest for the safety and services of their establishments, oh wait...

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:48 | 5187549 taggaroonie
taggaroonie's picture

I just closed my ANZ account for unrelated reasons actually. I feel a bit sorry for the telephone banking clerk I swore at, though.

Fri, 09/05/2014 - 23:49 | 5187552 starman
starman's picture

Drop your trousers band over and say ......

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:31 | 5187626 Kina
Kina's picture

I got 3.35% 12 months with NAB

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 00:53 | 5187647 RobbyV4
RobbyV4's picture

Yeah a complete joke, however I think they have to place these ads by law when rates change, even if it is silly.They are probably down from 0.1% or something.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 06:56 | 5187881 JPMorgan
JPMorgan's picture
  • Receive next to no interest, check.
  • Pay a monthly penalty fee for not keeping enough on deposit, check.
  • Cannot change accounts or move to another bank without racking up huge penalties linked to mortgage related products that the bank just made up in the first place (derivatives), check.  
  • Run the risk of being denied the withdraw or electronic transfer and possible devaluation of your money (bank holiday), check.   

The fractional reserve banking system is like the matrix, most people are unaware.

For the majority it will be a financial blood bath and slaughter with no escape route when it does all finally go to shit.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 07:57 | 5187907 'argar the 'orrible
&#039;argar the &#039;orrible's picture

Someone in the ANZ bank made a right boo boo when placing the ad. For the real story go to. http://www.anz.com/aus/RateFee/InterestRates/Rates.asp.

Up to 4% interest on time savings. Its marvelous what a bit of research will do.

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 08:03 | 5187911 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Who needs interest?  There's NO inflation!  At the department store the other day, I was pricing a telly and then went back 10 minutes later and it was the SAME price!! No inflation!......

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 11:25 | 5187967 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

Absurd?  Compared to...

these "9/11's" NDAA's, followed by multiple war(s) in the ME and Eastern Europe with (no resistance from the public) = World War III ?...

Why the hell not when everything else they seem to do to us "works"???!!!

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 11:00 | 5188135 esum
esum's picture

Citibank has one up. Insert ATM (citi debit card) and request cash.... SORRY DONT RECOGNIZE YOUR CARD..... call the 800 number below and refer to incident xxxxx... wtf I just deposited a ck for a grand and asked for 300, with 25g's cleared in the acct. 

So i call the 800 # and the operator asks all kinds of ??, then tells me to try again.... fail ...and then says .. I DONT KNOW WHAT'S WRONG ... GO TO ANOTHER ATM OR ANOTHER BRANCH...WE HAVE BEEN GETTING A LOT OF THESE COMPLAINTS... wtf?? AND THANK YOU FOR BEING A LOYAL CUSTOMER FOR 50 YEARS.... oh now i feel so much better.... 

ok so the bank opens in a few minutes and i wait and ask the manager wtf? he has no clue... i ask what he/the bank is doing to investigate and correct the problem. he says from the bank's point of view it's not a problem....  so its not a proble4m with me either, and now i just transferred the acct to another fed funds bank closer to my humble abode... PROBLEM SOLVED

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 11:20 | 5188182 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

They are doing us a favor. By offering these rates they are giving us an incentive not to invest our money there. Thus when the big banking confiscation comes there will be less for them to steal

This guy is a stealth Zhedger

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 15:31 | 5188679 ItsDanger
ItsDanger's picture

Let's see what their loan rates are (mortgages, LOCs, car loans, credit cards, etc.).

Sat, 09/06/2014 - 17:48 | 5189005 bobthecat
bobthecat's picture

This guy is obv writting the article to fit his world view, and make it seem like anyone depositing foreign reserves under the limit in the ad will pay a negative rate.  Rates are also 0% for accounts under the minimum.  Stop trying to project fear.  You're trades have made no decent money over the past several years.  All you do is keep talking about the "big one" thats going to destroy everyone except the readers of your blog... 

If you actually knew how to run money, you'd be running money instead of writing a blog that gets a guest post on ZH..... 

Mon, 09/08/2014 - 00:49 | 5192657 Factotum
Factotum's picture

Yea.  china is Soooooo Wonderful.   That is why on the order of 50 to 100K of them are coming to this country eacn year seeking residency status.  That status costs them 500K.   So something on the order of a 100 Billion dollars is coming from China to the US every three years, along with their wealthiers and most competent people.

Now exactly how many US citizens are going the other way?   Hey, if you think this country is so bad, why not start the rush to China.   Or perhaps, as am alternative, Russia, or India, or Brazil.   Or possibly grow a brain and use it

Tue, 09/16/2014 - 15:21 | 5223752 fanrunning
fanrunning's picture

Alright I just don't understand what to do now. It says that I'm at peril if I don't act. In other words how do I "allocated their investment capital to bet that the currency would collapse." ?

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