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Is This Why Stocks Are Soaring?
Yes, we know the real reason why stocks are suddenly soaring is that global economic growth is once again tumbling...
... so much that the Bank of China is now actively contemplating joining its western peers in flooding the world with a few extra trillion in liquidity, the very reason why there is no growth to begin with, but still, this is just too good to pass by, and follows directly on the heels of Stocks Slide As Gartman Goes "Long Of One Unit Of The US Equity Market." To wit, just out from Dennis Gartman:
At the moment then, we are reticent about owning equities...
This after Gartman got stopped out of his "one unit of the US equity market" recommendation from Thursday. So what is Gartman long?
We are still long a bit of Apple...
Yep, the only stock that is down today, after it was revealed that iOs would automatically buy 1 stock of AAPL the moment it was downloaded or something.
Incidentally, earlier when the "market" was trading around the flatline, we commented:
Market unsure what Gartman is doing right now
— zerohedge (@zerohedge) September 24, 2014
Judging by the relentless buying action since this tweet, Gartman's position has since been widely disseminated.
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Some more C-notes wasted if you listen to this conniving cunt.
FOOL - thats the ticker to the 5x levered inverse Gartman ETF.
I guess Gartman didn't get the memo about bentgate with the new iCrapple 6+ spy device. The iOS8 flaw is nothing compared to this.
http://www.dailytech.com/iBend+Reports+Grow+of+RazorThin+iPhone+6+Foldin...
Too bad AAPL used cheaper 6061 tempering in their flagship device instead of stronger 7075 tempering. You know, the same stuff used in aircraft parts and quality tent poles. Flexes without distorting.
The sheeple will still eat that shit up.
It's a feature.
You put it in your pocket wrong.
You must buy the latest iPants if you want to put the flagship in your pocket.
L O Fucking L
Bung: Very, very funny!
Edit:
6061 and 7075 are alloys, not tempers.
A comparison to Galaxy Note 3:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwM4ypi3at0&feature=youtu.be
Everybody has a village idiot, Gartman is Zero Hedge's He makes us all feel better about ourselves.
It's a fucking wave two correction you fucking mooks!
Nasty fucking wave three down next week you fucktards!
What a bunch of jerkoffs here
So funny
And blow me
I'll be back...
And Bunghole:
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2014-09-11/us-stocks-give-scotland-no-poll...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/7075_aluminium_alloy
I am Cornholio!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqaKi9NTzS4
WHAT!?
Elliot Waves? Yer sad devotion to that old religion hasn't produced any useful information or divulged the location(s) of the rebel base...
HEY! I think I'm onto something...
What do Gartman, Goldman, and Krugman have in common?
Gart-MAN
Gold-MAN
Krug-MAN
No, not that.
The answer is that they are all full of shit.
Or you know, just don't sit on it.
Hang it around yo' neck like Flava Flav!
Bung, alloy, yeah - this is bad - although as a practical matter, it may be a good time to invest in companies that make covers for iPhones lol.
iPants! HA!
That's some funny stuff there... Glad I bought a Note 3 last year... I carry it in my back pocket like a wallet and sit on it most of the day, no bends...
Remember cops putting their radar guns between their legs getting testicular cancer?
Save your ass. Measures the same.
We like your bunghole
This dude is money. Albeit in the opposite sort of way...
Stocks are soaring because overnight it was looking like a Black Wednesday was on the cards then suddenly every Central Bank started buying Index calls across Europe, and US and Japan.
From the charts looks like the starting time was 9:00 AM GMT
I wonder how high they want it to go?
They don't know. They just react: "then suddenly every Central Bank started buying Index calls across Europe, and US and Japan."
Indeed, central banks will backstop this market forever, they have no choice at this point; if they let this thing come apart it game over and they know it.
Not that I'm looking for an answer (because I agree 100 percent with the comment) but still...why?
Because despite their private armies they know living in a society that has collapsed would not be pleasant for anyone.
markets will drop
we're doing the Boom/Bust thingie
profits still high
corporate buybacks strastopheric
both of those will turn ... and it won't be pretty
This guy is now officially a clown.
You are officially a fucking douche-turd
Lol! Why bother?
Mass Fraud should be a crime against humanity.
Please support this petition at whitehouse.gov.
https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/mass-financial-fraud-should-be...
The petition needs 150 signatures to go "live" to the public.
We here at Zerohedge should start a hedge fund called the Gartman Goofed Fund. We buy whatever he is selling/sell whatever he is buying (with leverage obviously because we're a fucking hedge fund) and we make BILLIONS!!!!!!!!
I'm in! Whats not to like? This trade has been almost 100%!
" I'm still a bit long the tip of Steve Liesmans dick."
~ Penis Gartman~
LMAO. He is too much. Worth the price of admission. lol
the "market" is just two co-located computers
Still don't know what a Unit is. Unless Gartman is referring to Skynet's T-800 unit or the more advanced T-1000 unit; but I wouldn't want to be long a T-1000 unit
We need Gartman with Stopler gone.
Thanks for the laugh!
there's a difference between Apple [or HTC/Samsung], especially now, versus FB and Twitter and such. I think Apple remains a good buy - to have and to hold - at least into late December.... wink wink... and remain puzzled by ZH's apple bashing.
Anyway - the map is not the territory, and I'm not sure indexes, or the market generally has ever been more unrelated to companies actual health and prospects and such.
Actually making and selling a product and having relatively untapped Asian markets to sell it in seems pretty solid.
Of course, the real money is in the volatility...
All managers nervous but saying - its the only game in town so put all your eggs in one basket.
Elwood: What kind of music do you usually have here?
Claire: Oh, we got both kinds. We got country *and* western.
The entire operation is simply working perfectly, but when she blows, it will be something to behold.
C',mon, he only said "reticent" (same as retentive) about equitites. He is not saying sell or buy more!
Even the miners are up, wtf? And Au and Ag? I'm so sick of it all.
Could people please stop using that word incorrectly?!
There's an epidemic of pretentious morons saying "reticent" when they probably mean to say "reluctant".
I love how consistently wrong Gartman is. That's pure skill.
“Is this why stocks are soaring?”
Uh, there’s more.
Many years ago, I began to examine financial statements issued by cities and counties, special districts and state governments. I found that they had amassed surpluses in the trillions. When I studied this for California, I found surpluses (about the year 2000) that divided out to $20,000 for every man, woman and child in the state; you read that right, every man, every woman, every child. Then I factored in numbers included only in footnotes and the dividend ballooned to over $40,000 for every man, woman and child.
These surpluses are in the form of cash and bonds, real estate and stocks, domestic and international; and represent an over collection of taxes. See, ‘Who Owns City Hall?’ and ‘Of Lords and Cattle’.
Public Employee Retirement Systems (PERS) were/are a major part of these surpluses. By my estimate (as of 2000), PERS of all states owned $3-$6 Trillions of all publically owned corporations (Microsoft, General Motors et cetera). Members of PERS are, essentially, foot soldiers for the elite criminal class: without these foot soldiers, there’d be no one to carry out genocides and general plunders of the criminal class.
I can guarantee these useful idiots watch stock markets with more than a little interest: they know a rising market means more certainty they’ll receive constantly increasing pay and pension checks. And, when PERS sustains losses, public employees are really vocal about stiffing taxpayers to make up for losses in their PERS.
Thus, the primary reason the stock market is rigged/propped-up is to keep these foot soldiers happy and, thus, obedient to commands of the class characterized by, for example, Goldman Sachs, munitions makers and big banks.
Quite frankly, I really don’t care about their pay or pension checks. As far as I’m concerned, the only questions of importance are, ‘Who owns those surpluses?’ and, ‘When do I get my dividend?’ and, ‘How is it to be done?’
Today's snap back rally in the markets was a correction of an EW five wave impulse. It will not last more than a day or so and the downtrend will begin again dragging equities to further lows.
http://www.globaldeflationnews.com/dow-jones-industrial-averageelliott-w...
Some may be interested...
http://www.globaldeflationnews.com/never-before-offer-from-elliott-wave-...
Gartman is a COWARD and is on THE LIST...