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"Why Do New York Restaurants Suck?" - The Surprising Answer

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People Kept Complaining This Restaurant Sucked, Look What They Found Out…

 

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Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:25 | 5318372 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

Time to hire a WiFi Employee

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:27 | 5318378 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

that is amazing that they were able to solve that puzzle .......

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:31 | 5318394 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

"...out of 45 customers, 18 requested to be seated elsewhere."

 

....because the jackass at the next table was yammering on their phone.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:39 | 5318407 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

I've seen 3 couples at a table, all messing with their phones.

I wondered if they were setting up their next dinner date where they will ignore THOSE people, in favor of their phone.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:52 | 5318433 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

When I go out eating with somebody and they're playing with their phone, I just ask if they need to leave or if they're bored.
And if they takea phote, I just say it's idiotic and only morons post that crap on facebook.
I hate facebook and all that other crap and honestly, most of my friend also don't have a profile.
It's all a type of people. And I'm sorry, but people who post their food on facebook don't have a life and nobody really gives a fuck what you're eating.
Once a year, I even take out time to delete all the unwanted info about me on the internet. It mostly takes 1 day all together.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:30 | 5318509 90's Child
90's Child's picture

Unfortunately that's the generation I grew up with.

I loathe social media, twitter, Facebook, snapchat, Instagram ect.

It's all used to keep the sheeple occupied, where they only really care what's going on in 'their world'

Social media has become the 21st century's "television".

Making masses ignorant on the regular.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:39 | 5318527 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Also being of the mid-late 20s age group, too many times have I found myself among a group of friends or peers, head up, panning from left to right to find everyone busily staring at their little screens.

Snapchat this, Instagram that, blah blah blah. I don't know/care what the latest "social not-working" thing everyone's super stoked on, but it's a bunch of hooey and a waste of time.

Going out with some friends tonight - I expect several instances of group phone time. In a way, I have to say that a coordinated group phone time, which seems to happen 'organically', is actually a better deal than several staggered individual phone times. In the latter case, no one person in the group would get to enjoy the entire group's company in full.

"Hey gus, let's all take a break from taking a break to service our phonaddictions"

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:51 | 5318546 Stackers
Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:03 | 5318582 Liberal
Liberal's picture

iPhone6 and free WiFi are human rights!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:20 | 5318607 imaginalis
imaginalis's picture

New Yorkers are so full of their selfies. ;)

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:44 | 5318652 Liberal
Liberal's picture

That's anti-Semitic!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:22 | 5318739 knukles
knukles's picture

Time for resturants, etc., to have no WiFi service.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:41 | 5318780 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

They can jam cell service too but I have a strong feeling that it would hurt their business.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:25 | 5318872 Isotope
Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:52 | 5318939 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

Get a Blackberry. It will automatically slap you for taking food pictures.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:13 | 5318991 Bangalore Equit...
Bangalore Equity Trader's picture

Listen. Let me be clear here. You USSA nutjobs deserve all the "EVIL" that is headed your way.

Lookout!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:51 | 5319200 New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

This reads like BS internet myth.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:34 | 5319465 DirtyWilly
DirtyWilly's picture

Make ordering and time in the restaurant available on the phone.  Hold them accountable, publish the review with a datestamp of their actions.  Solved.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 22:23 | 5319584 MeMadMax
MeMadMax's picture

This must be a nyc "thing"....

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:47 | 5319754 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

True story:

A couple years ago, we spent a night out with friends at the 'Feast at Lele' in Lahaina, Maui.

For those not familiar with this luau; it costs over $100/person and has fabulous live polynesian entertainment while your personal server treats you to a 5-course meal. The venue is a very intimate amphitheater-like setting beside the sea. It is the most expensive, but probably the best luau on the island.

Seated at the table across from us was a family of four; the two children were around 12 to 14 years old.

Throughout the show, all members of the family were constantly fiddling with their cell phones.

But, the piece de resistance was the 14 year-old boy:

He spent the ENTIRE evening watching an Adam Sandler movie on his portable DVD player...

 

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:52 | 5319761 espirit
espirit's picture

I used to say a 16 year old girl would commit suicide if she couldn't post face time...

 

Now I'm not so sure about the nex-gen.

 

Cope Bitchez, or jump.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 00:11 | 5319784 Handful of Dust
Handful of Dust's picture

1) Charge $10/min WiFi connection time since they'd rather talk then eat and enjoy their company who is present with them; and/or,

2) have a separate "Play Room" for those who'd rather play with their WiFi instead of eating and/or enjoying their company.

I bet the issue would clear pretty fast.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 07:07 | 5320021 What does it al...
What does it all mean's picture

This is all bull shit.

NYC restaurants suck because the products are getting worse (cheaper) and experience is inferrori compare to the old days.

Nothing is what they claim it is.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 12:39 | 5320905 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

This little study shows all the signs of an "Urban Myth."  No-one in New York says: NYC.  Recovering video data from 2004 is ridiculous.  Most security loops from that era were 48 hours.  It hits on themes we all have strong opinions about.  None of the characters were identified.  It breaks out details and statistics that are just too good to be gathered with a few surveilance tapes.

I fully expect this piece to appear in Snopes soon.

 

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 07:06 | 5320022 What does it al...
What does it all mean's picture

This is all bull shit.

NYC restaurants suck because the products are getting worse (cheaper) and experience is inferrori compare to the old days.

Nothing is what they claim it is.

Mon, 10/13/2014 - 05:09 | 5323178 Abbie Normal
Abbie Normal's picture

I took a photo (probably of the same family except that the grandparents had joined them) sitting at the Kona Airport and all six of them are on their iDiot devices.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 04:36 | 5319959 zerocash
zerocash's picture

And it's not new either. I read this a few months ago on another site.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 10:37 | 5320477 fedupwhiteguy
fedupwhiteguy's picture

I agree with NEP. Is read like it purposely doesn't fault the restaurant nor the waiters. I call BS!!! F this bs spin.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:44 | 5319326 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Listen Bangalore Equit...

 

I am looking forward to the annhilation of India from Pakistani Nukes because of the Kashmir.

 

(A decade, or so, ago, I had a vivid dream that I was watching the exchange of Nukes from the perspective of Earth Orbit. At times my vivid dreams have been quite a bit prescient.)

 

I will be laughing my ass off as the Muslim Militant Suicidal bastards rain Nuclear Fire, Brimstone and Waste all over those bathing in the shit infested rivers of India.

 

That is the EVIL that is headed your way. 

 

Be careful what you wish for others as you just may be the first to realize it.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:45 | 5319497 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

One man's SAARC is

another man's poison

candy!

Take it easy American

dandy!

Enough with the bombs and the 

hate!

Here's to dreams of good things and clean rivers for all.

Why think like a shorty when you're so Tall....

tom?

 

http://aadivaahan.wordpress.com/2014/05/24/living-the-3g-life/

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 06:23 | 5320000 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Listen ORI.

 

As I wrote before I will restate. Be careful what you wish upon another as you will end up receiving exactly what you wish for upon yourself

 

You wish for peace and clean rivers.

 

Well I have no problem with that. My hope is that you realize that.

 

I am just writing as a mirror...exposing that which others project.

 

Note that I rarely post anything but responses.

 

When Bangalore Equit... chooses to project hatred then I will return to him his own reflection just as I return a reflection of peace unto you.

 

We are all mirrors of a sort ORI. I know that the Hindi have taught you that.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 04:42 | 5319963 Bangalore Equit...
Bangalore Equity Trader's picture

Listen General Tom.

Amerka the great has it's own little nasty neighbor. You will notice a sharp rise in cancer treatment and death in USSA.

http://enenews.com/lettuce-west-coast-900-pcikg-fukushima-radioactive-ma...

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 06:49 | 5320005 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

By the way...In the dream the Pakistani attack happens at night.

 

What was very strange is how the Hemispherical Blast Waves in the Mesosphere glowed Electric Green...like an Auroral Borealis show. There were many of these Hemispherical Pulses going off over the Indian Subcontinent.

 

Unfortunately I concur that Cancer Rates in the North American Continent will increase as a result of your Nation's actions, as well as the suicidal Islamic Republic of Pakistan actions, much more than for which Fukushima can be responsible.

 

But a Nuclear Winter will be our fate due to that.

 

By the way...Pakistan, in my dream, launches the first strike. The lit engines of the Ballistic Missiles were very visible from the orbital vantage point which I had above the dark side of the World..

 

My vivid dreams have been very prescient. Hell. I dreamed that I was walking down a grass mall in Portland, Oregon...and...it happened almost exactly as I had dreamed it just two years later. (I live in San Diego, CA. USA) There have been many other experiences. It is like Deja Vu in a sense. But I remember that the images came from a dream.

 

Right before the Columbia Accident I dreamed that a Space Shuttle landed at night with the Cargo Bay...on fire. Then Columbia happened.

 

But that was not what I had dreamt at all. It took me 10 years to see that fruition as the last landing of Discovery, at night, had a fire from an overheated APU when it landed. The Cargo Bay was on fire and the NASA Officials had decided to let it burn itself out.

 

Yeah. I can remember others.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 11:12 | 5320591 sleigher
sleigher's picture

That happens to you too huh?  I stopped even talking about it because people don't believe it.  I don't care what they think really, just sayin...

I have met others who have similar things happen to them.  Weird...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:57 | 5319530 ceilidh_trail
ceilidh_trail's picture

ananonymous is that you? Did you upgrade and move to india?

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:29 | 5319015 Nassim
Nassim's picture

Not if it is part of their attraction. Of course, the dodos can go elsewhere.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:34 | 5319163 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

And that the crux of the problem.

You're in the business of catering to people.

But you're customers are all subhumans.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 17:50 | 5321790 Dave
Dave's picture

Maybe, maybe not but jammers are illegal and they would get busted.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 11:05 | 5320569 sleigher
sleigher's picture

"Time for resturants, etc., to have no WiFi service."

I was just gonna say, can the restaurants install cell jammers?  Although the undesired effect would probably be less people in the restaurant.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:24 | 5318740 knukles
knukles's picture

.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:35 | 5318751 jbvtme
jbvtme's picture

i stopped and asked a young girl for directions last week. she was seated outside at a cafe and was completely immersed in her iphone. i broke her spell and she was annoyed and thought i was trying to pick her up. she looked up and our eyes met. they were deep and dark and her youth was stunning and beautiful. more than anything the iphone has robbed us of the flirt. that smile between the sexes that makes your heart sing.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 22:56 | 5319661 conscious being
conscious being's picture

Truth is, someplaces, its still endemic, the flirting that is, not the jobsPhone.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:13 | 5319412 Silveramada
Silveramada's picture

Yep, almost everything is...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:47 | 5318928 Syrin
Syrin's picture

People suck, face it.   It's why this nation is going down the shitter.   They voted for the American Fuhrer twice, and those fuckeheads in NYC are some of his bigggest supporters.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:40 | 5319320 Terminus C
Terminus C's picture

You are right! If only Americans had seen the light and voted for McCain...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 22:08 | 5319553 logicalman
logicalman's picture

Please tell me you forgot the /sarc tag.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:05 | 5319685 Syrin
Syrin's picture

I see you make enormous assumptions with little evidence.  I imagine that will serve you well in life.   Meanwhile, ANYONE would have been better than the Fuhrer.   My pick was Ron Paul, but we see how far that went with the people who voted for the Fuhrer.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:04 | 5319684 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

voted for a fuhrer four straight times by my count.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 01:06 | 5319860 froze25
froze25's picture

That's is true there as well as many other places. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:27 | 5318618 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

The real answer is: New Yorkers SUCK!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:45 | 5318655 Liberal
Liberal's picture

That's racist!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:49 | 5318930 Syrin
Syrin's picture

Against whites maybe, but it's also true.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:42 | 5319177 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

Thankfully I'm a WNYer - it's too bad my state's douche central's name is the same as my entire state. 

Although if you tell someone you are from NY it's automatic that they think you are from douche central, so most folks that live outside greater douche central will qualify it as WNY/CNY/Southern Tier/Finger Lakes/ADK. (I leave out 'upstate' becuase it's what douches from Westchester say to make themselves feel like they aren't part of douche central - even though the real upstate is north/east/west of Albany.)

 

And little Andy can suck my dick. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:32 | 5319301 PT
PT's picture

True story:  I originally started reading this article on my phone.  But then the "Sponsored Financial Content" column decided to cover all of my screen except for the right-most 6-7 letters.  I don't know how to make the SFC column disappear - touching it affects the writing underneath it, not the SFC column itself.  The article is now unreadable on the phone so I turned on my computer (better keyboard anyway).  Tylers - if you are reading this, please try viewing your website on different phones so you can see the problem and fix it.

For the record, no I am not at a restaurant.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:55 | 5319363 847328_3527
847328_3527's picture

There's only one group of Merikans more noxious then New Yorkers and that's LA people.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:05 | 5318702 Freddie
Freddie's picture

+1

When I first saw the headline about why is the restaurant getting (undeserved) bad reviews - it is because NY'ers aka restaurant patrons are rude and obnoxious scum. 

Midwesterners and others who visit New York are also pretty clueless AH's  NYC is not really a great place for a trip unless you really want to go to crappy overpriced stage shows or you want to visit the cradle of crony capital-fascism.

I pretty much avoid going out to dinner because everyone is fiddling with wireless devices and other BS.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:06 | 5318593 tmosley
tmosley's picture

It won't be too long before we cut out the middleman and just upload our minds directly to the internet.

What's on the phone/internet is more interesting than the real world.  Eventually, the real world will fade away, leaving only the virtual one behind.

Bet you didn't realize that the people put themselves into the Matrix by choice.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:11 | 5318600 90's Child
90's Child's picture

That kinda runs along the lines of second life, WoW, and all those other MMO games.

Where people would rather invest their life's into a game to escape the real world. They have marriages in those games and people get really into it, where they go through their real life as a drone basically until they are on their game and live their life out through there.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:30 | 5318878 NaN
NaN's picture

True, but the purpose of Life is...?

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:40 | 5318903 90's Child
90's Child's picture

The purpose of life, is a life with a purpose.

So I'd rather die for a cause then live a life that is worthless.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:07 | 5319689 Syrin
Syrin's picture

Well said.   Are those your own words or are you quoting someone?

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 08:43 | 5320103 90's Child
90's Child's picture

Quote from Immortal Technique.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 06:24 | 5320001 oudinot
oudinot's picture

'The unexamined life is not worth living"

Socrates

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:45 | 5318918 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

To reach virtual heaven.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:44 | 5319487 New World Chaos
New World Chaos's picture

Is that where you have your dead meat-brain scanned and simulated so that you can live forever in your favorite MMORPG?

Better hope the matrix doesn't run on Windows.  Hackers won't just steal your identity, they will steal your soul.  G-men will be able to send you to Hell without a warrant.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:01 | 5319673 conscious being
conscious being's picture

Life is for learning, dude.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 01:11 | 5319865 froze25
froze25's picture

Create more life

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:35 | 5319314 PT
PT's picture

"Winning".  I bet in the real world they don't even get to talk to the opposite sex.  Just work and concrete and poverty.  No wonder they can't get away from their game.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 03:34 | 5319934 JB
JB's picture

As someone who has played WoW, the community can be the best thing, or THE ABSOLUTE WORST thing about MMOs... Sometimes both at once.

 

I know of several 'local' guilds. They all live near each other, and have plenty of in-person interaction. Drinking in game with guildmates is lame. So much more fun to do it IRL. 

 

The best, most successful guilds all are friends outside of the game.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:15 | 5318845 Socratic Dog
Socratic Dog's picture

Then we'll cut out the internet, and upload our minds directly to .gov.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:12 | 5319256 falconflight
falconflight's picture

The only thing we all belong to is the gov't.  Dem Nat'l Convention 2012:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=6gLa9Te8Blw

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:47 | 5318791 Slomotrainwreck
Slomotrainwreck's picture

G*d D*mn background music over monotone voice. How stupid is that video? I can't understand much of anything. The closed caption blasts on for a half second. Yeah, and get off my grass too! I need a nap to get away from this crap.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:56 | 5318555 90's Child
90's Child's picture

Defiantly, I constantly bitch to my girl while we are in public and all you see is people on their phones. Not interacting with each other

Like really who honestly gives a fuck that you are eating at Red Lobster, who really cares what you're doing at any one given time? Like is your world so small that the only thing that matters is "where Jeff is eating at" or what "Michelle is wearing to the movies"

Shit is trivial.

Then again my girl bitches at me for being on ZH, because
"I can communicate with people it's technically social media."

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:01 | 5318578 chunga
chunga's picture

If Tyler would bring back the junk button we could go back to calling ZH "anti-social" media.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:35 | 5318631 IANAE
IANAE's picture

o/t

hmmmm..."junk button" sounds intriguing.

being relatively recent to ZH, is anyone willing to reminisce and describe this feature?

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:38 | 5318646 chunga
chunga's picture

There were no up/down arrows. If you didn't like someone or their comment, the only option you had was to click "junk".

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:53 | 5318674 IANAE
IANAE's picture

Thx Chunga -

[pulled up from my post waaaay down this thread]

...apparently a tragic case of "slow death by success" ... the technology angle is largely a red herring since this pattern is well known.

restaurant has its mojo and appreciative local customers etc. and then becomes tourist darling likely named as a place to visit when in NYC.

tourists flood the joint and crowd out the locals, tourists complain about service times and food that doesn't meet their inflated and stylized expectations of NYC cuisine.

Moral of the story: be careful what you ask for (biz and tourists).

cue the Seinfeld... NO SOUP FOR YOU!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:11 | 5318837 r00t61
r00t61's picture

Not only was there just a "junk" button, but if a single post hit the max junk threshold (at least 50 junks), then the post got "nuked" and was automatically hidden from view.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:56 | 5318679 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

Yeah....I read and respond on ZH probably 95% of my time on the phone. There I am, thumbs blazing in the restaurant with all you people. Don't like the service at the restaurants? Eat at home!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:55 | 5318809 25or6to4
25or6to4's picture

Maybe there should be phone and no phone sections in restaurants now similar to when smoking was allowed back in the day.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:18 | 5319001 infinity8
infinity8's picture

That is actually brilliant.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:52 | 5319065 IANAE
IANAE's picture

an excellent self-selecting/sorting approach... additional suggestion: surcharge the tech section (or discount the non-tech section)

...educated guess is the tech section shrinks (or disappears entirely) in short order.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:37 | 5319471 Totentänzerlied
Totentänzerlied's picture

Suggestion for restaurateurs:

Reserve a small partitioned area for customers who are willing to turn off or give up (e.g. check into coat-check) their phones for the entire duration of their stay. Give them a small discount and put your best busboys, waiters, and runners in this area.

I can't even imagine how surreal it must feel to be a restaurateur considering the possible hit to business from not having (or ending) public wifi.

"...educated guess is the tech section shrinks (or disappears entirely) in short order."

Doubt it, I think the restaurant would disappear first - "we can't go there, they discriminate!"

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:33 | 5319017 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

I gave you the greenie because of your handle. The comment wasn't bad, either.

In my 7th grade band class, one of the songs we played was '25 or 6 to 4'. It was contemporary at the time (mid-70's). What's strange about it is that I have realized that this song was describing the methamphetamine user's experience (looking back at history). Today, we have doctors proscibing Ritalin to children (all perfectly legal, of course).

I've never been to New York (thank God), but the restaurants probably DO suck (because Bloomberg likes to ban sorft drinks over 16 oz., and regulate the fat content of the food). It's probably like Moochelle's school lunch progrom there. If I can't get a deep-fried cheesy one-pound greaseburger and a large order of onion rings dripping with oil along with my 40 oz. Scotch-and-soda soft drink, I'd probably grab my i-Phone and bitch about it too (if my thumbs weren't too fat and covered with grease to work the damned screen thingie). Thanks to Bloomie, I can see my penis now, because I am losing so much weight. <sarc>

A little band called 'CHICAGO', from the late 'Vietnam Police Action' era:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nb13I34J8K4

 

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:34 | 5319310 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

The title refers to 25 (or 26) minutes to 4 AM.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:32 | 5319460 25or6to4
25or6to4's picture

I'm truly humbled by the ZHers compliments. Nice way to celebrate my nearly one year ZH birthday.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 01:26 | 5319869 Freddie
Freddie's picture

NYC sucks.  The only thing even remotely decent about NY is the pizza is pretty good.  A guy on the plane said the reason the pizza is pretty good in NYC was the water from upstate NY that comes into the city water taps.

Who knows if he was right.  

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:21 | 5319280 cnmcdee
cnmcdee's picture

One better get rid of the food.  Just make it a phone place to hang out.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 17:49 | 5321786 pgroup
pgroup's picture

You assume his wench would provide better service than the eatery. There's no guarantee of that.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:47 | 5318789 Slowdrip
Slowdrip's picture

Brought a tear to my eye. Man, those were some exciting days at ZH, with the lonely 'junk' button. Where's my box of Kleenex...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:39 | 5319034 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

'Slowdrip':

MEMBER FOR:

One week 6 days.

You should see your urologist about the issue you have. You can most likely find your box of Kleenex where you left it, on your nightstand (right next to those magazines that depict people in the act of sexual intercourse). Don't forget to pick the soiled Kleenex up from the floor when you get out of bed. They have a tendency to stick to your feet.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:08 | 5319100 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

Because Slowdrip wasn't registered (as a contributor / member) does not imply that he / she was not a "lurker".

I "lurked" for a whole two years before getting around to register, as I suspect many others did also.

So, maybe he / she does recall the early days. Maybe he / she was in fact registered under another user name / e.mail account? You never know . . . . .

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:06 | 5319391 Slowdrip
Slowdrip's picture

 

Wow! The all knowing Mr. Scott. Probably, a member in good standing at MENSA. Thank you for refreshing my memory, on how long I have been following ZH. Appears you have had some experience with a soiled kleenex or two as well. Impressive..

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:56 | 5319765 forexskin
forexskin's picture

nope, you're mistaking him for fast drip - AKA squirt.

it actually takes a sphincter muscle - you should get one.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 07:27 | 5320032 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

 

 

Slow Drip, Foreskin .... whats next Taint Boils

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:03 | 5318825 The Phallic Crusader
The Phallic Crusader's picture

I'd be willing to bet that ZH would get more people to sign up, and eventually more readers {by some reasonable percentage, not huge but significant} if even people who were not logged in could see the red and greens.  Should be easy to code - why not try it for a few days some week, guys?

 

Sometimes little adjustments can make a big difference.  Here....  decent difference, I'd predict.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:27 | 5318875 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

The last thing this site needs is more statist trolls.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:33 | 5318884 chunga
chunga's picture

Ok, we thought it was some spam artist, but since you (the candidate) stood out on our porch for two days and two nights without encouragement, you appear to be legit.

Maybe we are going to regret this, but your account at zero hedge has been activated.

This is a one-time login. 

Use it not more than once twice, not less than once never, but once.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:38 | 5318896 pods
pods's picture

Even worse nid, now is voting time. All those "if you don't vote you can't bitch"  people come out of the woodwork. 

pods

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 00:00 | 5319768 forexskin
forexskin's picture

oh yea, riight... must remember to give my mandate to one of these lovely candidates.

lessee, left cheek, or right cheek - what?

groove up the middle again?

shit...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:56 | 5318953 Escrava Isaura
Escrava Isaura's picture

 

 

The Phallic Crusader,

I like your idea...., a lot.

Tyler should consider... if he's not, already.

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:26 | 5319011 infinity8
infinity8's picture

I agree. I think it would be an excellent, passive way of letting the sheep get a clue, maybe think about shit they avoid thinking about. Frightened sheep. But, it would take the fight club from the basement to the colosseum too. Maybe.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:56 | 5319072 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

@ 'Phallic Crusader':

I thought over your idea. At first, I agreed with 'Nid Styles', and saw a possible issue with statist paid trollistas coming out of the woodwork (and this is a distinct possibility, seeing the number of posters who sign up and comment for a few days or weeks, and then disappear). I mean, you yourself have only been here for 14 weeks...

If you look to the right and scroll down, you will find a box called 'contact information'. There, you will be able to propose your idea to the Tylers. It's THEIR website, and THEY make the decisions regarding format.

SO:

WHY are you logging on to propose a change in the format of the ENTIRE WEBSITE in a thread regarding an old posting of a story as to why the service in New York restaurants sucks? I'm really curious, '5 weeks'.

Not a WORD regarding the article, I see.

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:40 | 5319323 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

Yeah, the nerve of him making a suggestion. He should be banned forthwith and with some extreme prejudice thrown in with righteous indignation. The very idea! Heavens to Betsy!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:12 | 5319106 silverliberty
silverliberty's picture

LOL, just think the NSA and all the other alphabet soup agencies are down loading all the crap these virtual zombies are putting on the net. 

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 17:44 | 5321768 pgroup
pgroup's picture

I'd be a lot more interested in what your girl is taking off in that dark theater. Lemme know when she gets really into whatever she's going to do nekkid.

That's real social media. Sharing the important shit.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 23:17 | 5319702 Mentalic
Mentalic's picture

Sadly, I have seen both parents tapping away on their phones, while their kid is staring straight ahead bored as hell ! Whatever happened to a family dine-out !!!

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 14:16 | 5321215 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Replying to my post above as an update of going out with a bunch of friends last night (to celebrate one of our birthdays) - quite an even split of guys and gals.

No group phone time. Barely any individual phone time. I used my phone once to add a new contact.

You gotta appreciate those rare times when no one serviced their phones en masse.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:36 | 5318520 ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

Go out to eat with friends. Like all the phones in the middle of the table. First person to grab the phone pays for dinner.

Works well, until you get the self absorbed jackass who says "I was going to get the bill anyway!" Double points if he's checking ZH!!

Lastly, invite them over to your house instead and turn off the wi-fi. I've got shit for service so they can't check their phones if they wanted! Also, we have plenty of booze and food prep work/cooking we asks guest to do that by the time dinner's ready, we're all feeling good and not worrying about the rest of the fucked up world.

I suggest you try!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:18 | 5318732 Barnaby
Barnaby's picture

Meanwhile you just ate 100 mg of saliva and possibly some ass crack so that you could go out and have fun with friends!

Yay!!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:40 | 5318904 pods
pods's picture

Ass crack is under-rated. 

pods

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:44 | 5318919 knukles
knukles's picture

Lightly breaded and served along side a soft meat taco can be exciting

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:17 | 5319101 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

"I can cook you dinner at my place, unless you'd rather we just eat out instead."

"What's at your place?"

"Hot Polish sausages and sweet seasoned tacos."

"Have you ever seen a vertical smile?"

"What's that?"

"If you cook dinner for me, I'll show you."

"Sounds like fun."

"Do you have corn?"

"Sure I do."

"Good. I really like corn on the cob, you know." (She licks her lips sensuously) "Do you cook with real butter?"

"Wait. I have to check my emails."

She walks out... forever...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:48 | 5318537 highly debtful
highly debtful's picture

Funny, just now (today) I returned from a "koffietafel" (a "coffee table", literally translated). I don't know what is customary in the States, but this is the typical lunch in Flanders offered by a family after the burial of a deceased family member, in this case the "mater familias". Having no cell phone myself currently, let alone an Iphone, Ipad, tablet, fablet (phablet?) or whatever, I noticed how one third of my own crowd (brother-in-law and friends of the village where I live) started taking out their gadgets and showing features and apps. This was 50 percent of the conversation (during approximately 2 hours) at my table of six. 

Toys for the masses destroying any sense of real priorities in life. Because that's what it really is for most people: entertaining electronic things to play with.  

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:18 | 5318606 Gohn Galt
Gohn Galt's picture

You can delete all your information about you from the internet? How?

 

Interesting article.  It might be a nice idea for someone to open a restaurant in NYC that blocks all wi-fi and cell service.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:24 | 5318628 Croesus
Croesus's picture

@ Gohn Galt: 

Yes, you can delete your information from the internet. Some of it can be done online, but others, you have to write to the companies themselves. It's not hard to do, but it comes back after a while, just because the information is collected from public records. 

Start here: 

http://adjustyourprivacy.com/opt-out-of-online-tracking/

http://www.nocards.org/

Then, get copies of these 2 books: 

http://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Invisible-Protect-Children/dp/1250010454/re...

http://www.amazon.com/How-Disappear-Digital-Footprint-Without/dp/1599219...

In "How to Disappear", pay special attention to Chapters 5 & 7. Both books are similarly-themed, but both authors take different approaches, and offer different ideas. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:45 | 5318921 Gohn Galt
Gohn Galt's picture

Thank you.  I'll check it out. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:53 | 5318945 Croesus
Croesus's picture

@ Gohn Galt: 

No problem! Also, you can take down photos of your house from Google Street View: 

http://www.sileo.com/google-street-map-remove-house/

The result is basically blurred images, so it doesn't stop anyone from driving by, but it's an additional information barrier that might help some of you. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:36 | 5318635 chunga
chunga's picture

Another Zuckerberg will come along with electronic, digital food.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:42 | 5318913 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

You don't have to be a artist to do that.

1. Google your name
2. Make a email adress that you'll never use again
3. Open all the links in google that carry your name
4. Change every profile and delete all the info that can lead to you

And for sites like ebay:
1. I open a account by using a throw away visa for confirmation.
2. The first adres is fake and also the name
3. The second adres is the right one and I always place that one as shipping adress.
4. Every year I also change ebay accounts
5. Paypal: i only use throw away visa's from the post office that I can recharge like a disposable cell phone card but which doesn't carry my name.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:29 | 5318621 Croesus
Croesus's picture

It freakin' amazes me, to see couples out on a date, not talking, just staring at their damn phones... 

Technology and "scientific innovation" will be the death of us all. 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:57 | 5318686 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

When I am with my GF, I do not hit the phone if she is at the table. If she hits the can, fair game.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 17:59 | 5318961 Escrava Isaura
Escrava Isaura's picture

 

BlindMonkey.

Thanks for the ‘good’ advice.

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:44 | 5318650 Super Hans
Super Hans's picture

Right on!

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:48 | 5318663 lincolnsteffens
lincolnsteffens's picture

Is it any wonder no one has time to look around and see who the boogey man is?

The magic light emitting phone is soooo much better at neutralizing the awareness of the sheep from danger than the TV. TV is still good for mind control but the wi-fi phone is great for total distraction.

Hey, hey, look! Look at what one of my 357,000 friends sent me! Cool, huh?

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 22:34 | 5319615 Jafo
Jafo's picture

 

 

We play phone roulette.  First person to pull out a phone pays for the whole table.  That fixes it.

Sun, 10/12/2014 - 13:52 | 5321134 dirty belly
dirty belly's picture

Hate = Fear

Mon, 10/13/2014 - 13:05 | 5324592 Againstthelie
Againstthelie's picture

It's very simple: If you eat or meet with somebody who is using his phone, YOU failed. Because you waste your time with sheeples and not a humans.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:15 | 5318995 skree
skree's picture

We have a dining out rule...the first person who pulls out their phone...pays for everyones meal.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:41 | 5318408 Keyser
Keyser's picture

The addiction to iGadgets is epidemic... People cannot leave the damn things alone for more than 30 seconds in any and all settings... I truly believe they contribute to the dumbing down of the people... 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:46 | 5318423 DetectiveStern
DetectiveStern's picture

It's getting pathetic. People meet their friends and then spend their time with each other texting/whatsapping etc their other friends.

 

What's the fucking point? Luckily in my group of friends if you are caught spending too much time on your phone then you will be tagged in a facebook post outing you as a member of ISIS or a paedo.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:02 | 5318579 chubbar
chubbar's picture

I went to a pre-wedding party (friend of a friend,etc) where most of the folks were mid-late 20's and hadn't seen each other for years, kind of a mini-reunion. Lot's of hugs/kisses and within 30 minutes over half of the 70 or so in attendance were on their I-gadgets solo. It was amazing to watch. I'd say probably 99% spent a significiant amount of time on their phone/gadget over the course of the 3 or so hours I was there. I think some were texting back and forth to each other in the same room. Simply insane.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:27 | 5318620 Took Red Pill
Took Red Pill's picture

Ironically, social media is causing us to be less social.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:00 | 5318688 BlindMonkey
BlindMonkey's picture

That will work, right up to the point where the cops swat team your asses and gun one of you down.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 13:53 | 5318436 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Distraction nation.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:31 | 5318455 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

And here I thought it was because Gordon Ramsey made restaurants so perfectionist they forgot how to cook fast and furious. That plus he scared the shit out of the Mexican help so they went back to El Paso like you know at normal illegal alien run eateries.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:34 | 5318517 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

McD's in nyc has waiters?

 

Snooty people.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:07 | 5318598 Otrader
Otrader's picture

The one near Wall St has waiters, Piano bar and chandeliers.  Been to it a few times.  Same food as any other McD's.

 

http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/mcdonalds-new-york-386?select=DM5Izer845X...

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 16:00 | 5318690 NoPension
NoPension's picture

Have the best wait staff, best cooks and chefs, and get the fastest wi-fi available.

Then charge by the minute after and hour.

I don't know, I'm trying here.

OT, whoever is singing the anthem at the O's game better keep his day job.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 15:29 | 5318624 Squid Viscous
Squid Viscous's picture

Huxley Cafe?

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:13 | 5318480 tostaky06
tostaky06's picture

"I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots."

A. Einstein

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 18:18 | 5319004 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

Perfect quote.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 20:48 | 5319342 Marco
Marco's picture

I found that a bit too prescient even for someone with his intellect and Google and Quote Investigator seem to agree with me ... not a real quote.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:46 | 5319504 thamnosma
thamnosma's picture

Should have known.  Thanks for researching that.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:05 | 5319387 Ward no. 6
Ward no. 6's picture

guess there is no actual proof of that quote coming from Einstein

http://quoteinvestigator.com/2013/03/19/tech-surpass/

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 14:58 | 5318574 Pie rre
Pie rre's picture

I read somewhere the average peson checks thier phone 1500 a day. Remarkable

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:07 | 5319096 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

Re cell phones:  We've become a nation/globe of obsessive compulsives.  I can't stand my iPhone; I go cross-eyed trying to read the mouse scratchings.

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 19:18 | 5319122 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

The only time I "check" my mobile TELEPHONE is if and when it rings. Which may be a few times a week. So for me 1500 "interactions" with "the telephone" might account for a solid decade's use . . . .

 

Sat, 10/11/2014 - 21:06 | 5319392 Ward no. 6
Ward no. 6's picture

i keep my phone off unless i need to call someone which is seldom...

no news is good news for me...

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