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Doug Kass: The Day The Market Died
Here is Doug Kass' latest: "The Day the Market Died" (to be sung to the tune of Don McLean's " American Pie" and with special recognition to Sean Brady and Tom Kearney who originally presented this concept after the Nasdaq blew up in 2000).
Have some fun and sing along!
A long, long month ago
I can still remember
How the market used to make me smile
What I'd do when I had the chance
Is get myself a cash advance
And add another social media stock to the pile
But Whirlybird Yellen began to make me shiver
With every speech that she delivered
Bad news on the global growth front
Still I'd take one more punt
I can't remember if I cried
When I heard about the lowly CPI
But you could lose your capital and your bride
The day the market died
So bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just one month from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
We're right back where we were in July
Did you buy stocks you never heard of?
LinkedIn at $230 or above?
'Cause the shoe shine boy told you so
Now do you believe in Home Depot?
Can Berkshire save your portfolio?
And can you teach me what's a P/E ratio?
Well, I know that you were leveraged too
So you can't just take a long-term view
Your broker shut you down
No more margin could be found.
I never worried on the whole way up
Buying Tesla from the back of a pickup truck
But on Friday I ran out of luck
The day the market died
I started singin'
Bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just three weeks from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
Yeah, we're right back where we were in July
Now for 20 days, we've been on our own
And my E-Trade broker probably won't pick up the phone
But that's not how it used to be
When investors snapped up another bubble
With cash they borrowed easily
And a quote that flashed up permanently green
Oh, and just as things were turning 'round
Putin slapped the Ukraine down
The courtroom was adjourned
A Bear Market verdict was returned
And while the EU read a book on Marx
Buffet smirked and Chanos barked
While the bears sang dirges at "The Ali Blah Blah Top"
The day the market died
I started singin'
Bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just three weeks from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
Yeah we're right back where we were in July
Manic panic, it's just like the Titanic
Unsinkable and now problems well beyond the Atlantic
The Dow was at 16,500 but falling fast
On "Squawk Box," Tom Lee landed foul on the grass
While Joe and Becky were still trying for a forward pass
With Larry Kudlow on the sidelines in a cast
Now "Fast Money's Halftime Report" air was filled with sweet perfume
But Mr. Market wasn't playing the Najarians' marching tune
The bulls all got up to dance
Oh, but they never got the chance!
'Cause the bearish players took the field
As the long bond fell another 50 basis points in yield
Was mean regression ever really repealed
The day the market died?
I started singin'
Bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just three weeks from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
Yeah we're right back where we were in July
Oh, and suddenly we're underwater
Billionaires all hot and bothered
With no cash left to buy again
So come on, Fed be anxious, com-pen-sate
By lowering to negative the fed funds rate
'Cause easy money is a bubble's only friend
And as I watched the indices fall
I received the dreaded margin call
No broker born in hell
Could make me want to sell
But as my gains fell fast into the crash
E-Trade began demanding cash
The talking heads were talking trash
The day the market died
They were singing
Bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just three weeks from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
Yeah we're right back where we were in July
I met a strategist, the market's most optimistic equity muse
I asked him for their earnings news
But he just smiled and turned away
I logged on to the trading floor
Where I made my fortune weeks before
But they demanded to see cash before I played
And on T.V. the ticker streamed
Stifel's Bannister cried and the short sellers dreamed
Not a bullish word was spoken
The daytraders were choking
And the three stocks I acquired last
GoPro, Netflix and Comcast
Couldn't catch a bid and faded fast
The day the market died
And they were singing ...
Bye bye to my piece of the pie
I poured my paycheck into the Russell
Now my cash account's dry
It's just two weeks from a new all-time high
And now we're right back where we were in July
Yeah we're right back where we were in July
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Whew she's going down blew past 16451. And the sp below 1900. Oh and I forgot. Bitchez !
so, was it lagarde or hillary?
Dennis Fartman went long last night.
What's he saying now? I want to reverse front Fartman him.
When Yellen speaks again, if she mentions "a breach of protocol", you'll know the end is nigh.
did PPT get columbus day off?
Pirates never take a day off, they're either pillaging, or they've died.
Pirates never take a day off, they're either pillaging, or they've died.
But the newly funded Airline Seat Protection Team is forming up now.
First rip out and burn all the warm moist foam seats from airlines and airports. (a really big job).
Took my Chevy, but was repo by Mr. Levy.
But, but, but stocks only go up in the land of the free (markets). Besides, the markets are blessed by the Gods of the Fed. And gold and silver are only allowed to go down
That'll be $29.95, please.
Thats great!
Can you do Heaven and Hell, Black Sabath, on the very bottom?
Love to hear it when we bang through 666 on the S&P this time.
Can't wait!
Kick ass song!
Dow dow dow Down......................
some baaad news is forth coming.
Somebody call a vet, cuz this puppy is sick!
Alright, except wrong about "the ticker streamed".
Funny how cnbc has done away with the top screen ticker now that "the market's died".
I noticed that too. Much easier to hide it all in that crappy little box while everyone on the network screams, "Buy stawks, they are attractive at these levels!"
So Doug has some free time today. Good to know.
That pie should have Obola and Holder poking their little "roach heads" out of it... I wonder if Susan Rice baked that pie?
The Dow is sharting itself as we speak.
I keep hearing Bloodhound gang... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChmUC0OysoU
"We don't need no water, let the mother f***er burn."
http://www.silverdoctors.com/jim-willie-the-economic-endgame-has-arrived/
Jim Willie: The Economic ENDGAME Has Arrived
Posted on October 13, 2014 by The Doc
great poetry! Needed to laugh after I checked my retirement website!
Janet be yellin' when she sees what I gots
the day the market died is the day that the market dictated to the world that the SOLE purpose of a corporate structure was to serve SHAREHOLDER VALUE.
The search for shareholder value became the be all and end all of all WS stock plays.
Gone were the days of a corporation serving the client, serving its salaried workers, its supply chain, its people's government though taxation, symbol of shared civilization. As a cog in the moving economy that respects the big picture of adding value to the SYSTEM, not just to the bank accounts of greedy shareholders only interested in speculative IN/OUT plays.
The day REAGANOMICS made speculative capitalism the mainstay of WS and City, commercial capitalism serving the economy, died.
Now the whole shooting match belongs to the Oligarchs and the economy is just their HAREM and we its harem eunuchs as keepers of its prize jewels : the Apples and Googles that run the world!
Welcome to the Haremised stock market and the banks pumping it and dumping it to serve their Sultans, like the Janisseries of the Sublime GAte !
You are wrong. It has nothing to do with the emphasis on shareholder value nor Reaganism, it has everything to do with low, real interest rates, Fed Gov't deficit spending, Great Society "policies", fictional racism, and of course QE printing.
So, all this just happened all on its own ?
Nope, it was planned and packaged. You are in denial of the global Oligarchy thread.
And fictional racism is gonna bite you up your real ass one day. Its not a fleeting fancy its more deep rooted than that. It serves a social divide.
QE printing was invented to SAVE the Oligarchy. Reagan was top Oligarchy front man and believed in their take over of the whole shooting match, just like Maggy. He stage managed it.
After Piketty's demonstration of causality of Rentier capitalism's systemic inefficient action and subsequent collapse we now have this follow up :
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/3-things-nobel-prize-winner-tirole-teac...
Having interest rates so low is like turning down the volume knob on a radio. It does nothing to fix the Signal/Noise ratio, it just attenuates the signal needed by everyone to figure out the true price of Munny.
Paging 'Wi Tu Low' over at #Fortress Ponzi Mgmt.
The pollution of free money is causing diseases everywhere. Even the HFTS can't play pong against themselves anylonger. It reminds me of the pics of Bernie Madoff in his apartment window days before he got hauled off to prison...All ponzi's eventually run out of ways to cover your scheme. I don't see how anybody can credibly call Wall St. a market when the fact is that it has become just one big Casino filled with compulsive gamblers using other peoples money to get a fix...
tahoebumsmith: The pollution of free money is causing diseases everywhere.
But you do understand it is zero's and ones on a computer screen backed by absolutely nothing, right?
Or if you actaully want to drill down it is backed by the future labor of wage slaves.
I prefer to call them heart beats. It adds realism to that trade.
One side of that trade is finite (heart beats) the other side.....not so much,, the sound of clickity, click, click...
Yeah, but those future heartbeats are going to repudiate all of that debt and stick a lot of banker/politician heads on their pitchforks.
Fabulous parody. Good job!
Excellent!
It's hard to write an 8-minute song without a drum solo....
all this and not one link to the thing.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqukWXviyew
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cav37weCxEU
funny and smiles for that.
.
but.
Or perhaps a similar parody in honor of today's NASDAQ breaking again:
I can't remember if I cried
When Facebook’s IPO began to slide
But something touched me deep inside
The day the NASDAQ died
We said bye-bye to open outcry
Sent my orders to the NASDAQ, but the NASDAQ was dry
Them good ole boys stopped trading APPL and sighed
Saying: “This'll be the day that I die,
this'll be the day that I die”
So, let’s go back to open outcry
NASDAQ’s too complex – we must simplify
Can’t get a freaking quote on BBBY !
This should be be the day that it dies,
This should be the day that it dies
Well done with the lyrics change!
Excellent! I was hoping for a mention of Santelli, but that's OK.
They should have used lard and not that Crisco crap.
When financial terrorist Bernanke announced through the main stream media that he could not refinance his mortgage, it was the signal to wake up the Sleeper Sells.