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Caught On Tape - Some Folks Jumped The White House Fence, Again

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Just weeks after WhiteHouseFenceJumperGate saw the head of the Secret Service dispatched - having been disappointed not to be able to implement her reforms that would ensure the safety of the White House, the agency reports:

  • *MAN STOPPED AFTER JUMPING WHITE HOUSE FENCE: SECRET SERVICE

What is worse - much worse - is this african-american chap proceeds to kick and harass the guard dogs sent to dispatch him... an egregious act in anyone's book.

  • *AGENTS WITH DOGS STOPPED WHITE HOUSE JUMPER, AGENCY SAYS

Caught On Tape - the dreadful dog-kicking moment...

Video of the incident Wednesday night taken by TV news cameras shows a man in white shorts just inside the White House fence on Pennsylvania Avenue.

 

The video shows the man lifting his shirt as if to show agents that he has no weapons. The man is then seen kicking and punching two Secret Service dogs that were released on him.

 

* * *

As The Washington Post reports,

Secret Service officials apprehended a person who jumped the White House fence late Wednesday, news reports said.

Authorities shut down Lafayette Park after the incident, moving dozens of tourists to H Street. Reports said the White House was under lockdown.

Philippe Melaku-Bello, a peace protester who said he regularly spends time outside the White House, said he saw five to six officers with batons out standing over a man on the ground. He said the man was not moving. Officers immediately started moving bystanders farther from the White House. While he was moving away, he heard the barking of a Secret Service dog.

 

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Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:06 | 5365646 STG5IVE
STG5IVE's picture

Where's the video? Fishing for hits?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:12 | 5365665 TahoeBilly2012
TahoeBilly2012's picture

Wait a second... cops shoot kids with toy guns but someone hoping the WH fence gets the kids gloves and a psyc eval? What a world.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:16 | 5365696 Jlasoon
Jlasoon's picture

No threat, he was black.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:19 | 5365707 palmdetroit
palmdetroit's picture

hope he wasn't form w. afrika

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:22 | 5365713 remain calm
remain calm's picture

We need a Canadian Nationalist to jump the fence, those fuckers are serious.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:40 | 5365770 Stackers
Stackers's picture

That could have been Obama's son

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:48 | 5365801 e_goldstein
e_goldstein's picture

(if Obama was straight).

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:53 | 5365813 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

It's a Secret Service dog.  It thought there were prostitutes, and when it found none, it went somewhere else.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:57 | 5365827 SumTing Wong
SumTing Wong's picture

What if several dozen of us met up and jumped the fence together? What would they be able to do then?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:02 | 5365837 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Is he wearing an apron?  What, did he just got off work bussing tables?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:15 | 5365879 max2205
max2205's picture

I repeat, black guy white shorts, at night.

Attention, some white shorts is running to the White House.!

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:12 | 5366053 The Juggernaut
The Juggernaut's picture

Remember when the prez said he has bills to pay... Well thats one of his debtors coming to collect.   Dude kicked their dog... He means business.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:26 | 5366089 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

I call bullshit.  That is one wuss-ass police dog.  That dog should've been trying to eat that dude's leg off. 

There is a method to this nonsense, but either way it's distraction.

Withdraw your consent, and you win.

I am Chumbwamba.

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 00:17 | 5366346 12ToothAssassin
12ToothAssassin's picture

This is another TPTB message to POTUS. And WTF is with the Tylers? African American? Are you kidding me? This site has gone in the shitter over the past year. The Tylers are officially compromised.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:25 | 5366088 acetinker
acetinker's picture

They'd kill you, that's what.

What if several thousand of us decided to quit paying taxes and obeying the so-called law?

What would they be able to do, then?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:30 | 5366098 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Whatever it is I hope it involves them sacrificing Kimmy Kardashian in a giant meat grinder on a Black Moon of Death.  Or maybe into a wood chipper face first on a Saturday.

-Chumblez.

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 00:05 | 5366320 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

If you want to see the future, just look at what happened with the Nazi collaborators after France was liberated. 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 05:18 | 5366583 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

It will be like start of French revolution II.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:24 | 5365721 ACP
ACP's picture

---Speaking strictly about the Secret Service tactics---

The guy is punching the dog, obviously unfazed, and a half dozen idiots are standing around doing nothing? WTF?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:37 | 5365766 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Not even a full moon.  Is PCP making a comeback?

They need a moat full of those crocodile jews Tyler is always writing about.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:49 | 5365802 ACP
ACP's picture

What I fail to understand is don't these fence jumping zombies eat brains? No brains in the White House as far as I know.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:12 | 5366052 mkkby
mkkby's picture

Where the fuck are the national park or USDA police?  Those SOBs have automatic weapons and MRAPs.  Ni66a would have been cut in half before he even got halfway up the fence.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:33 | 5366109 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Right.  Which is why you should believe none of what you read and half of what you can see with your lying eyes.  Follow along as the script unfolds and keep track of the twists and turns.  But stay out of the play yourself.  Everyone in it dies in the end.

-Chumblez.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:38 | 5366124 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

The Secret Service (SS, what a coincidence!) should hire some LA cops (or maybe Ferguson). No problems, guaranteed. Or they can borrow my nephew's pitt bull. I guarantee you that guy wouldn't have been able to get a kick in on him.

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 09:06 | 5366922 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

Albequerque PD would be my choice...

26 Fatal shootings at hands of police dept.

DaddyO

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:39 | 5366126 acetinker
acetinker's picture

Seems like the MSM narrative is focused on making Obama seem vulnerable.  The Russian 'invasion' of Ukraine didn't work, nobody much gives a shit about ebola.  Hmmm.

OK, so the so-called 'leader of the free world' is at risk from from some lone jackass who jumps the fence.

Is anyone else reminded of the film Wag the Dog?  Just askin'.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:04 | 5365843 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

He did give those dogs a heluva beat-down.  Not often you see a black guy just whip the shit out of the dogs they send to take him down.  I give him a 9 out of 10 on that effort.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:39 | 5365944 GoldenTool
GoldenTool's picture

Aren't dogs ebola carriers, if the guy had ebola that is...

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 23:07 | 5366196 ACP
ACP's picture

Right you are. Dogs aren't affected by the virus but yes they can be carriers.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:17 | 5366059 QQQBall
QQQBall's picture

Was that Michael Vick?

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 05:41 | 5366593 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Notice how the SS swings into action only after the dog is threatened with harm.  Notice how the SS swings into action only after the dog is threatened with harm. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:20 | 5365710 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

Put turrets 50 cal and 1000 troops around the white house.

Governments for the people, need security against the people.

Forward!!

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:01 | 5365835 SumTing Wong
SumTing Wong's picture

Used to be the people's house, when Presidents understood they were just people too. Now we're "folks" and they're the elites. Andrew Jackson had to escape his own inauguration party out a window. That was a man. (also dealing with a would-be assassin...) These pansies in the White House need to fuck off. Dig up James K. Polk, who only ran for Pres once. I'd vote for his decaying ass over any of the numbskulls that have been up for office recently. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:12 | 5365868 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Two parties actually.  Last one had a wheel of cheese...huge one actually...size of a wagon wheel...that apparently went bad.

"Stunk up the joint for months" so it is said.

Back then you went home after election.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:17 | 5366066 Budd aka Sidewinder
Budd aka Sidewinder's picture

Yeah Teddy Roosevelt used to have trick or treaters knock on the door and they'd give kids candy at the White House

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:21 | 5365712 Bangalore Equit...
Bangalore Equity Trader's picture

Listen.

Time to call the American FBI, those guys are "GOOD"!

Fence jumping, new American sport for Youtube click-baters?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:56 | 5365818 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

Have I told you lately to fuck off?

 

Well, I have now.

 

Dumbass

 

RIPS

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:21 | 5365708 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

 

 

1)  Cue someone's cousin about how this chap was only holding a sandwich.

2)  Blame Ebola.

3)  Scream Racist!!!!

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 00:21 | 5366352 Cornfedbloodstool
Cornfedbloodstool's picture

ROFL!

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:11 | 5365669 VATICANT
VATICANT's picture

Sure that was a dog? Looked like Michelle to me

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:16 | 5365701 ACP
ACP's picture

No, the butt was too small.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:24 | 5365725 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

It's an attack wookie.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:12 | 5365679 Bumbu Sauce
Bumbu Sauce's picture

And now it is on Obama's plate.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:22 | 5365715 NoVa
NoVa's picture

Allans Snack Bar?

 

Seriously, let the man wearing a dress into the house where they are welcome. 

 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:30 | 5365737 Nocturnal Goyim
Nocturnal Goyim's picture

Just reported "Dogs receiving full disability checks"

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:14 | 5365874 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Bitchez gotta get paid...it's ruff out there...

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 03:51 | 5366542 Blackfox
Blackfox's picture

In the UK if you hit a police dog you get charged with assaulting a police officer - I shit you not.

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 07:13 | 5366652 drdolittle
drdolittle's picture

It's the same here. They're officers and wear a badge. My BIL shot his service dog because it started challenging his alpha status. They could have charged him but didn't. Got mad about it. He trains the damn dogs so I think he's probably most qualified to decide when the dog needs put down. He's alright for the law and order type, really more of a good redneck peacekeeper. One of his dogs sat down in front of me and he was cool enough to play it down "probably smelled a marijuana towel we'd been playing with" hahaha.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:35 | 5365760 HippieHaulers
HippieHaulers's picture

I wonder how antsy Obama is getting with all these volleys across his bow. Play ball or else is the message. I wonder if he was aware when elected of the extent of Hope and Change he was going to oversee in this "Century of Change".

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:35 | 5365934 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Was it eric dickholder?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:06 | 5365651 Bumbu Sauce
Bumbu Sauce's picture

Create a crisis then use that crisis to get done things you would not otherwise be able to.

Wait and watch folks.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:30 | 5365744 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Vote for Fence Jumper 2016 for President

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:18 | 5366069 Budd aka Sidewinder
Budd aka Sidewinder's picture

Clipboard Guy for Veep

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:06 | 5365652 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Why do so many people want to get into the white house? Are people jumping the fence to get onto the golf course Obama is playing that day?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:08 | 5365661 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

Because the dude was hallucinating.  He thought the fence was a shark.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:18 | 5365703 Jlasoon
Jlasoon's picture

Nah, that's where all the high paying jobs are.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:28 | 5365731 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

"Why do so many people want to get into the white house?"

He heard you had to run to get elected?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:34 | 5365753 nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol..."Da fence is too damn high!"

Apologies to Jimmy McMillan ;-)

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:08 | 5365660 vote_libertaria...
vote_libertarian_party's picture

It just blows my mind that the rules of engagement aren't:

 

1. shoot

2. shoot again

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:12 | 5365674 Bumbu Sauce
Bumbu Sauce's picture

2 SS dogs should be enough.  Last time a man jumped the fence, he got INSIDE the White House(allegedly).  Then the SS decided to start keeping the doors LOCKED.  Top Men people.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:18 | 5365890 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Not alleged actually.

That dude got some quality time in there.  Sample some food, turn up the tunes, smoke a doobie.  Who knows! Having a time either way.

This dude probably gonna be in the hospital for a while. "Dog number three was sent in." 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:12 | 5365677 Jugdish
Jugdish's picture

You can't shoot a black guy. You are supossed to let him beat, rob, rape, and murder you and then call the police. Don't be racist.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:18 | 5365702 i_call_you_my_base
i_call_you_my_base's picture

"You can't shoot a black guy."

What country do you live in?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:34 | 5365756 Jugdish
Jugdish's picture

I live in the United Socialist States of Amerika.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:16 | 5366061 mkkby
mkkby's picture

Shoot and shoot again is only for children pointing their fingers.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:25 | 5366085 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

you should make pause

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:11 | 5365667 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

What's with all the fucking hyphenated names in the posts TODAY !!

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:13 | 5365673 q99x2
q99x2's picture

YeeeeeeeeeHaaaaaaaaa!

Obama's going to protect you.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:25 | 5365726 nmewn
nmewn's picture

So, we got a black guy tenderizing dog meat at the WH. Eboma already said dog meat is a little tough in Dreams of My Father.

Hire the guy as the WH chef! ;-)

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:43 | 5365786 ACP
ACP's picture

I admit it, I laughed out loud at that.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:04 | 5365844 nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol...apparently not as bad for cat lovers as taking the family dog for a car ride.

For some reason ;-)

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:15 | 5365687 bigrooster
bigrooster's picture

At this point you have to think that members of the SS want someone to reach Obama.  Maybe some federal employees still care about this country enough to see the traitor removed.  

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:20 | 5366070 mkkby
mkkby's picture

Not true.  When they want him out they'll shoot him themselves and put the gun in the hands of a patsy.  Pay atttention.  History repeats.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:14 | 5365688 walküre
walküre's picture

confused Canadian tourist

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:19 | 5365706 Jlasoon
Jlasoon's picture

No shit, was the door unlocked?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:18 | 5365700 yellowsub
yellowsub's picture

Do you really think any gov't agency would be able to work that fast to correct their failing procedures? 

Obama needs to create another Czar for that.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:24 | 5365722 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

I am submitting my CV for the position of White House Fence Jumpers Czar.

Qualifications:

I have a fence.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:32 | 5365749 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

You're doing a hell of a lot better than the Ebola Czar. He has no medical experience and he has never even had Ebola!

Now me, I have jumped more than one fence in my time. And I have a fence. But my house is not white. How bout you?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:17 | 5365881 DollarMenu
DollarMenu's picture

But, he is on record about overpopulation being the world's biggest problem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRdpi0Ww2-8

 

But maybe there is no conflict of interest?

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 10:02 | 5367166 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

There will be enough Czar positions for all.  No need to compete.  Everyone gets a ribbon!

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:23 | 5365717 Spungo
Spungo's picture

If I ever become a billionaire, I'll pay people $10,000 cash to jump the white house fence. As they make the fencer harder to jump, I'll pay more. It'll be my own personal circus.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:23 | 5365719 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

Coming soon - paragliders bleeding from the nose and spewing vomit over the white house. Recently arrived from Guinea. This could get really entertaining.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:25 | 5365723 khakuda
khakuda's picture

Some Folks Jumped The White House Fence, Again.  Now, that made me laugh.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:00 | 5365830 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

We sic'd the dogs on some folks.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:26 | 5365729 analyzer_66
analyzer_66's picture

Project Mayhem in DC?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:35 | 5365739 Karaio
Karaio's picture

This guy is crazy! 

The guy jumped in! 

All wanting to distance Obola! 

hehe. 

"The pessimist complains about the wind, the optimist expects it to change, the realist adjusts the sails and who knows Murphy does nothing." 

A little Humor: 

 

1 If anything can go wrong, it will. And more will go wrong in the worst 

way, at the worst time and so cause the most damage possible. 

 

2 A shortcut is always the longest distance between two points. 

 

3 Nothing is as easy as it seems, nor as difficult as explaining the 

manual. 

 

4 Everything takes longer than all the time you have available. 

 

5 If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, all will - or that 

cause more damage. 

 

6 If you notice that something can go wrong in 4 ways and get 

usually waive them, a fifth emerge from nowhere. 

 

7 Whatever the outcome, there will always be someone to: 

a) interpret it wrong. b) fake it. c) say that had already foreseen in 

its latest report. 

 

8 When a job is poorly done, any attempt to improve it worsens. 

 

9 unfortunate events always occur in series. 

 

10 Every time you mention something: if it's good, just; if it's bad, 

occurs. 

 

11 In any formula, constants (especially those recorded in the 

engineering manuals) should be considered variable. 

 

The 12 pieces that will require more maintenance in the most inaccessible spot 

the machine. 

 

13 If you have something long ago, can play outside. If you play 

out something that has long been'll need it soon. 

 

14 You always find what you're not looking. 

 

15 When you bind: a) if you have a pen, no paper. b) for paper 

not have a pen. c) if both have nobody cares. 

 

16 Nature is always in favor of failure. 

 

17 Between two probable events, always an unlikely happens. 

 

18 Almost anything is easier to thread than to take. 

 

19 Even the inanimate object has enough to stay in their movement 

and causing a rib front. 

 

20 Any attempt to grasp a falling object will cause more 

destruction than if we let the object fall naturally. 

 

21 The only fault that football referee whistles with absolute certainty is that 

he is absolutely wrong. 

 

22 No matter how well done it is your job, where the boss always find 

criticize him. 

 

23 No employer keeps an employee who is right all the time. 

 

24 Every solution creates new problems. 

 

25 When talking about political corruption, verbs are always used in 

past. 

 

26 You will never catch traffic jam or closed sign fared too soon 

somewhere. 

 

27 The most common issues are those of which you know nothing. 

 

28 Two monologues do not make a dialogue. 

 

29 If you are able to distinguish between good and bad advice, then you 

not need advice. 

 

30 No one will be knocking on your door or calling you, if not 

there is some work to be done. 

 

31 The most boring job is also the least paid. 

 

32 To err is human. To forgive is not company policy. 

 

33 Every revolutionary idea causes three stages: 1. is impossible - 

do not waste my time. 2nd. is possible, but not worth the effort 3. I always 

said it was a good idea. 

 

34 The information that requires a radical change in design always comes to 

designer after the completed work, running and running 

beautifully (also known as syndrome: "Damn But only 

!!! now "). 

 

35 A man with a watch knows the time is right. A man with two watches 

know only the average. 

 

36 intelligence has limits. Not stupidity. 

 

37 Six Phases of a Project: Enthusiasm; disappointment; panic; search for 

guilty; Punishment of the innocent; Glory to non-participants. 

 

38 serious conversations, which are necessary only happen when you're with 

hurry. 

39 do not sleep until the children do five years. 

 

40 Do not sleep after they make fifteen. 

 

41 The required budget is always twice the expected. The time required 

is triple. 

 

42 The variables vary less than constants. 

 

43 Parents who love you let you do nothing. Liberal parents, are neither 

there for you. 

 

44 truck deliveries that normally take one day will take five when 

you depend on delivery. 

 

45 The only child who snores is what you want to sleep with you. 

 

46 Once you have exhausted all your possibilities and confessed his 

failure, there is an obvious and simple solution to any clearly visible 

another idiot. 

 

47 Any program when it works is already obsolete. 

 

48 No ball will land in a vase that you hate. 

 

49 when a program is already being used six months ago, it is only 

discovers a fundamental error. 

 

50 Children never stand still to take pictures, and are absolutely 

properties on a camcorder. 

 

51 No child wants clean lap. 

 

52 The tool when dropped on the floor will roll over to the corner 

inaccessible from the room. The way the corner, the tool hits first 

his thumb. 

 

53 practical guide to modern science: a) If it moves, belongs to biology. 

b) If stinks, belongs to chemistry. c) If does not work, belongs to physics. d) If 

no one understands, is mathematics. e) If it makes sense, is psychology. 

 

54 The virus that your computer took only attacks the files that do not have 

copying. 

 

55 The number of exceptions always exceeds the number of rules. And there is always 

exceptions to established exceptions. 

 

56 Whatever the fault of your computer, it will disappear in front 

a technician, thus returning him to withdraw. 

 

57 If she's giving you soft, it's ugly. If it's beautiful, is accompanied. If 

're alone, you are accompanied. 

 

58 If the course you wish to only have n jobs, you can be sure 

you will be the candidate n + 1 trying to enroll. 

 

59 Eighty percent of the final exam you will pay will be based on 

only class you missed, based on single book you have not read. 

 

60 Each teacher assumes that you have no more to 

do but study the matter of it. 

 

The 61 most valuable for their essay quote will be one where you do not 

can remember the author's name. 

 

62 Nice guys are ugly. Handsome guys are not legal. Cute faces and 

legal are gay. 

 

63 Most crafts require three hands to run. 

 

64 The nuts left over from a job never fit the screws 

which also remain. 

 

65 The more carefully you plan a job, the higher your 

confusion when something goes wrong. 

 

66 All things are possible. Just not very likely. 

 

67 In any electronic circuit, component life will be shorter 

installed in place of difficult access. 

 

68 Any design of electronic circuit will contain: an obsolete piece 

two impossible to find, and three still being tested. 

 

69 Today was really necessary? 

 

70 The light at the end of the tunnel is the train coming at you. 

 

71 Life is a drug. And you reincarnate. 

 

If 72 is written "One Size", you do not serve anyone. 

 

73 If the shoe fits, it's ugly! 

 

74 There are never enough hours in a day, but there are always too many days before 

Saturday. 

 

75 Every body is immersed in a bath touching the phone. 

 

76 Beauty is skin deep, but ugliness goes to the bone! 

 

77 The most necessary information is always less available. 

 

The probability of bread 78 fall with the butter side facing down is 

proportional to the value of the carpet. 

 

79 Confidence is that feeling you have before you understand the 

situation. 

 

80 The line side always moves faster. 

 

81 Nothing is so bad that it can not get worse. 

 

82 The material is damaged under the direct proportion to its value. 

 

83 If you're feeling good, do not worry. This passes. 

 

84 In cycling, no matter where you go; is always uphill and 

upwind. 

 

For over 85 who have taken at home, the furniture is always in 

front. 

 

86 There are two types of tape: what does not stick, and it does not come out. 

 

87 A healthy person is one who has not been sufficiently examined. 

 

88 You know it's a bad day when: The sun rises in the west; you jump of 

bed and miss the floor; The bird singing outside is a vulture; your pet 

ceramic bites you. 

 

89 Why is it wrong numbers are never busy? 

 

90 But you'll never use all that space Winchester! 

 

91 If you're not confused, you're not paying attention. 

 

92 In war, the enemy attacks on two occasions: when he is ready, 

and when you're not. 

 

93 All that begins well, ends badly. Everything that begins badly, ends worse. 

 

94 Friends come and go, enemies accumulate. 

 

95 "Batteries not included" 

 

96 You just need a document when, spontaneously, he moves 

the place you left where you will not find it. 

 

97 Children are amazing. They usually repeat word for word 

what you should not have said. 

 

98 One way to stop a race horse is to bet on it. 

 

99 Every particle that flies always find an eye. 

 

100 One never goes down hill.

hehe.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:45 | 5365795 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Some of these are cute. They are also off topic. The problem with a long post like this one is some folks will stop reading the whole thread and move on and not see other people's comments or post when maybe they might have benefitted. 

You are free to make your choice about what to do, but you may not have seen it in this particular light before. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:10 | 5366041 Karaio
Karaio's picture

@ MsCreant: 

If you excuse me, when I tried to edit the shit was already made. 

I copied the World and did not realize it would be so great. 

My fault, I admit. 

: - \

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 23:42 | 5366279 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

I have and will in the future mess up a lot worse than this. No biggie, just was not sure you were aware of the "effect." Some troll types do this stuff on purpose because they intend to disrupt a thread. I know you did not, and that you are not from "around here!" All good. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:01 | 5365834 Cobra
Cobra's picture

What the fuck language was that translated from???

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:12 | 5366049 Karaio
Karaio's picture

Portuguese - Brazil. 

:-)

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 04:19 | 5366559 ebear
ebear's picture

"What the fuck language was that translated from???"

Klingon by the looks of it.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:31 | 5366102 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

WTF is wrong with you?

quality of posts counts like contain the whole obumas speech in two lines

that's mastering

you just reverse it and that is not mastering

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:30 | 5365740 valkir
valkir's picture

Kenian guy jumped the wall.Trying to escape from WH.Security pull him back,he has more job to do...

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:16 | 5366760 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

We'll know things are bad when people start running and jumping from the other side of the fence.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:31 | 5365746 franzpick
franzpick's picture

Mr. Barry: 'May the fence be with you'.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:31 | 5365747 nink
nink's picture

They need to put an even shorter fence in front of the new short fence. Problem solved

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:32 | 5365750 loveyajimbo
loveyajimbo's picture

Jeepers, all the bro was tryin' to do was to deliver Barry's order... bag 'a choom, bag 'a meth, carton a' Kools, tube of tropical flavored KY and a bowl of gumbo...

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:34 | 5365754 Dollar Bill Hiccup
Dollar Bill Hiccup's picture

Maybe he just wanted to make a campaign contribution ...

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:24 | 5365908 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

Couldn't find any Tibetan Monks?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:59 | 5365771 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

This is a new extreme sport.

So far, our September 20th contestant, Omar J. Gonzalez, 42, of Copperas Cove, Texas, is in the lead. He made it just outside the presidential bed chambers. 

That will be the mark to beat. 

But that was a great attempt by today's contestant. Style points for duking it out with the dogs, but alas, not enough to put the "chap" on the board.

Edit:

Past contestants include:

August 7, A toddler squeezed his way through the fence of the White House lawn Thursday night, catching the eye of gun-toting Secret Service agents.

September 11, U.S. Secret Service agents apprehended a "Pokémon" nut who scaled the fence at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. and walked onto the North Lawn Thursday evening. He wore a bright yellow Pikachu hat and carryed a Pikachu plush doll.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:22 | 5365902 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

He was just trying to return George H. W. Bush's baggie from Lafayette Park. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:47 | 5365970 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

A pogo stick and a drunk Kennedy would amuse the masses in White House fence jumping tournaments. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:23 | 5366078 Budd aka Sidewinder
Budd aka Sidewinder's picture

Hey the hot little spinner from American Ninja Warrior already got a national hotel commercial

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:14 | 5366757 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

The new Crossfit exercise, jump a fence, run 50yds.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:40 | 5365772 flyonmywall
flyonmywall's picture

Hey, the homey in charge hasn't done anything for his bruthas in 6 years.

So, dey jumping da fence and dey gonna kick the niggah's ass, homey style.

You u want an asswhoopin, you can keep yo asswhoopin !

 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:41 | 5365775 Reaper
Reaper's picture

Are there special privileges for affirmative fence jumpers?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:48 | 5365977 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

They have genetic advantages that allow them to jump higher....  
Or is that Racist?

 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:45 | 5365789 gatorengineer
gatorengineer's picture

Even the damn dogs are PC.....  a real attack dog would have ripped his throat out....  i guess they are trained to go after blacks...

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:50 | 5365803 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Obama's Portuguese Water Dog 'BO' failed in serving WH protection. 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:14 | 5366750 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Licking his nuts(?) and smelling the Wookies hootch.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:52 | 5365809 henj
henj's picture

Lucky Obama was out playing Golf..

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:54 | 5365814 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Liberals are scaling the White House fence thinking they are crossing the border. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 20:56 | 5365819 bitterwolf
bitterwolf's picture

one of obammys brothas wanted a word with him,,hopped fence like in da hood.....see's that dam popo got the drop on him,,..pulled a hands up dont shoot ......all he wanted to say was he dont need no gotdam ID to vote or visit the prez....and proceeded to go all mike vick on the goddam dawg...

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:36 | 5366115 RallyRoundTheFamily
RallyRoundTheFamily's picture

all mike vick on the goddam dawg...

still chuckling

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:01 | 5365840 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

let whomever wants to get into the white house in, what is the worst thing they can do to the president? would anyone actually care if someone got through and did harm to this fucking piece of shit non american born citizen president?

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:12 | 5366745 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Wall Street would care

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:05 | 5365845 fibonacci's claus
fibonacci's claus's picture

isn't that what the govt is doing to us...  kicking and harassing the guard dogs?  u.s govt loyalty toward its american citizens is going right down the drain.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:06 | 5365846 I Write Code
I Write Code's picture

So the Secret Servix paid some bum twenty bucks to jump the fence and get caught.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:23 | 5365898 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

If he was from a male escort service, the story would never have been published. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 23:57 | 5366305 I Write Code
I Write Code's picture

I'll bet he knows that now.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:18 | 5365889 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

"Some folks,  have been treating me like a *dog*!"

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:23 | 5365905 max2205
max2205's picture

Plus 100 for the crack up comments tonight

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:27 | 5365912 Bumbu Sauce
Bumbu Sauce's picture

We're gonna spread happiness
We're gonna spread freedom
Obama's gonna change it
Obama's gonna lead 'em

We're gonna change it
And rearrange it
We're gonna change the world.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtGrp5MbzAI

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:39 | 5365941 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

I thought we were going to spread Obola.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:39 | 5365943 New Kid
New Kid's picture

My guess is that these fence jumpers are false flag attempts to justify turning the White house into Fort Knox. If the sheeple wake up after a disaster and decide to attack their oppressors, you need to buy just enough time for the chosenites to escape through the underground tunnels.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 21:49 | 5365981 Homey Da Clown
Homey Da Clown's picture

Did they check him for Ebola?

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:01 | 5366010 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Another DNC plantation member caught slivering back home during curfew hours. 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:29 | 5366097 Who was that ma...
Who was that masked man's picture

Oh, hey, wait a minute.  That's the President.  Must be sneakin' home after hittin' the strip clubs and don't want Michele to know.  No, wait.  That ain't the President after all, that's Michele sneakin' home after hittin' the strip clubs an don't want Barry to know.  It for shure is Michele.  I can tell by that there dog kick.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:46 | 5366141 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

There are plenty of weapons on the inside of that fence.  But you can be pretty sure they don't like the political optics of gunning down a Looney a couple weeks before the election. 

 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:10 | 5366738 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Isn't that incentive for everyone to start trying this?

 

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 22:52 | 5366152 Ginsengbull
Ginsengbull's picture

Back in the day, Jim Thorpe could have jumped that fence in a single bound, without touching it.

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 23:18 | 5366221 starman
starman's picture

It was Obammer trying to sneak back! Come on now "folks"!

 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 00:57 | 5366418 homiegot
homiegot's picture

It only takes one to succeed. 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 05:39 | 5366592 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

something poetic in these incidents

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 06:38 | 5366632 1stepcloser
1stepcloser's picture

can't wait to see 20,000 people at once jumping it.  Got more dogs?

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 08:43 | 5366835 Jacksons Ghost
Jacksons Ghost's picture

 Cops did not want to touch him...wonder why?   You know they were thinking it.....E B O L A.

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 09:21 | 5366998 loregnum
loregnum's picture

Clearly racism is why he had to assault the dogs as they are racist.

Damn blackies. 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 09:26 | 5367017 loregnum
loregnum's picture

Oh and I like the pussy secret service human fucktards standing there as he hits the dogs. I wish the human species would vanish. Useless cunt species it is. 

Thu, 10/23/2014 - 10:01 | 5367162 MrTown3
MrTown3's picture

Fuck the stupid dog.

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