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Friday Humor: Windows 10
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Da Plane! Da Plane!
Upgrades will be mandated by the US Government in 3...2...1...
Could be worse. I have Yosemite on my Mac and if it keeps and holds a WiFi connection for more than 15 minutes at this point in time -- I am extatic.
US "markets" just closed.
Bring out the further bad news on a Friday late afternoon (example
would be that Ebola doctor projectile sharted out of window of uber car as it drove around NYC).
Your weekend wallpaper: http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/PelosiEmanue...
(Pelosi uses Essence of Pastrami conditioner up top and has naturally occurring essence of Gefilte fish down low).
Guess how much those lil baubles are worth around her scrawny neck?
$350K
They're not farmed.
Yeah, windows 10 will be great. The fuck tards can't even count 8-9-10.
Remember when geeks were smart? Not any more.
Dude, it would actually be able to fly...
If you like being stuck in a right hand turn like you were in nascar or something.....
I run Windows 98. Works fine. It's so old nobody even writes viruses to exploit it any more.
I have Windows 10, and I can tell you that Windows Search still cannot find text (.txt) documents, inter alia, on my computer. That's despite carefully configuring the indexing options and rebuilding the index several times. Search has been broken for about 5 years now. Solution: I use a little program called Launchy that does the things M$, with its 128,076 employees, cannot do! Fucking ridiculous.
I haven't worked out how to read emails on Win8 so I still use XP for that. I live in fear of my XP dying one day.
and your so over virus'ed you dont see it anymore.
They couldn't do a windows 9. There is a lot of code out there that refers to windows 9* as an operating system version (specifically 95 and 98) and releasing windows 9 would have opened a can of worms the size of Michelles butt.
Yup, Yosemite is a disaster.
I'm loving Yosemite!
Handoff, and Spotlight are great. New cloud integration seamless.
Where's Reggie these days bashing Apple?
It needs to go to 11
'The Matrix' runs on Windows:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX8yrOAjfKM
So does 'Star Trek':
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbvezhW1J-I
'I'm givin' her all she's got, Captain. If I push much harder, she'll blow!'
'Dammit, Mr. Scott, I need Windows 11 NOW! Push it right to the limit!'
(to himself) 'Next thing ya' know, he'll have me put the engine nacelles on top and bottom...'
WINDOWS FATAL ERROR MESSAGE REMIX:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2k8Gl-XdcU
Yeup -- its the Windows Vista of Mac OS releases. There was a Leopard release back in the day -- something like 10.5.2 or something like that which was equally as horrible -- but Yosemite is a unmitaged disaster.
There was a Leopard release back in the day -- something like 10.5.2 or something like that which was equally as horrible
There have been MANY disastrous MacOS releases (google search it, everyone tends to have their own particular choice of worst ever) and as a long time mac owner with many macs I can pass on one little nugget of wisdom, never ever update MacOS during the first few months of release - this is the 'public beta' period. iOS can be pretty bad, but nowhere near as terrible. I try to hold off on update iOS as long as possible too.
Pretty much my reaction to many of the macOS releases: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ui9d7ZRlnBs
On topic, I actually quite like win8, not sure why all the hate.
And.. windowsME was the worst OS imo.
Well James,
Could you help me with my 2nd hardware issue neither their genius' nor tier 2 were able to resolve?
If it's a serious hardware problem and they won't replace the device, my advice is recycle.
it's clocked affecting the back plane & has blown one PS.
I switched from iOS to Windows Phone -- yes I know some poor sap at Langly has to listen to everything I do with the device, but apart form noodz and my fettishes of the EU collapsing upon itself, I am not too exciting.
Windows Phone is badass and a much more useable Phone OS than iOS is. The Lumia 930 is an awesome phone, with more HP than I know what to do with.
Thanks for the comment about Yosemite. I haven't updated my Mac in a while, and now I'm not going to. I've been scared to do any updates ever since I updated my phone to iOS7.
That's why I went to Linux, highly reccomended. It's free, and just simply works.
Good on ya, DMW! I've been primarily a GNU/Linux user since 1996 (even though the idiots I've worked for since then have without exception forced Window$ on me in some way, shape or form, such is the extent and the fullness of the subjugation we have been coerced and co-opted into), and besides the recent utter fuck-up of systemd, the whole ride on the GNU/Linux bus has been a wonderful, enlightening and mind-expanding trip! I've been laughing my arse off at the shenanigans and the outrageous, deranged imbecility that the vast, numberless Window$ hoipolloi have been subjected to, all of which they seem to have happily, fulsomely paid for.
But the feckless Apple crowd of fashion victims have fared little better. Why the hell pay for an operating system like Apple's Macintosh, which is built on FreeBSD ( <-- note the word "Free"? What part of "Free" don't you people get? )
Linux Mint 13; an "older" version but supported. I remember there was some kind of benefit for Mac owners 13 years ago; but I forget what it was supposed to be; and for Windows, you've got to be kidding. You can get an installation disc for Linux mint for free on the net. I think they charge 3.95 to mail it to you or something.
I am running Ubuntu 14.1 with a Mac OS X hack. So it is Linux, but it looks like a Mac on the screen for the most part. I poke fun at my business partner how I am running Mac OS on a Dell.
You think vaccine baby killer Bill Gates gave the NSA a back door into the operating system?
Does a bear shit in the woods?
Does a one legged duck swim in circles?
Speaking of backdoor...
Does a dog smile when he's reading the comics?
Is the Pope a Joo?
Is a bear Catholic?
What difference does it make?
is a frog's ass water tight?
Is a tight ass's water froggy?
Is a...
Sorry, I got nuthin.
Is the President a ..,
oh.., huh, wait.
"Is a bear Catholic?"
Does the Pope shit in the woods?
No kidding? SHIT-YEAH!
Look, beyond a doubt, if you're concered about trying to re-establish some kind of privacy (I won't even try to suggest you can preserve what you had, 'cos the horse has truly bolted and you have none of your old privacy anymore), don't use any I.T. service or product made or delivered in the U.S.
Of course, there are U.S.-based GNU/Linux distros, which will be just as susceptible. But there are others that are created elsewhere that are will not be accessible to U.S. government meddling. YMMV...
Do icebergs have tits?
Extatic is a helluva drug!
I am extatic.
And a Repblican.......
The Citizens United multinational fascists started enforcing computer security policies by edict with Sarbannes Oxley. They started censoring the internet with DCMA. Our political representatives are stupid, greedy, duplicitous cunts. Its not a question of being ordered at gunpoint to publish our lives and our work to MS Spyware, its just a question of when.
Eloi meet Morloch. MS Morloch.
"duplicitous cunts"
Now there's something to contemplate...
Dude; just install Linux Mint and erase everything else you'll feel much better.
Mint is nice, Do you like Ubuntu?
Just like in 1789!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SNxaJlicEU
Some govies still use XP, they rarely upgrade.
my co-worker's sister makes $72 /hr on the computer . She has been unemployed for eight months but last month her check was $12806 just working on the computer for a few hours. check this... www.yelptrade.com
WINDOWS 10 It does things you didn't even know you didn't want to be done!
Am I going fucking crazy? When did Windows 9 come out?
Version 9 was as useless as all the previous versions so they skipped it altogether. Unfortunately Windows 10 is just rebadged Windows 9.
Windows 9 was never released as it posed a danger to the current era processor chips and routers. It had so many back doors transmitting information about the user and their "preferences" it overwhelmed the outgoing bit tranmission system to the extent nothing was able to be downloaded. Windows 10 will Quarantine collected data and send it when the intergated camera and microphone detects you have gone away to take a Dump.
I guess that has the new battery in it
Windows XP was great.
I think Windows 7 was even better... faster, more intuitive, less glitchy...
Then they all lost their damn minds.
I have win 7. They are making programs after win7 to spy on us easier
Who cares we can't stop why hide. Tell um what you really think.
i believe it was after win 98se that they opened up all the ports to make spying easier...
I feel like someone at Microsoft said, "Hey millennials, iPads, tabletize me, and mobile apps or whatever? Let's make an OS that gives PC users the feeling of being at the DMV! We'll Call it Windows 8. Mobile apps millennials."
After windows 7 microsoft is dead to me. I guess after having finally produced a strong windows version there was no where to go but down for them, but they really took the elevator down
They release a good one about every other time or every other.
Good: Win 98se, 2k, xpsp3, 7
Not so good: 3.1, 95
Awful: ME (worst), 8, Vista
Or something like that. Whatever comes after Win 8 should be decent, hopefully.
pods
Win Server 2008 is good
I liked 3.1, including telnet. I'd take it over 8, any time.
I forgot to add 3.11 as being good. This is just personal experience. Not an IT guy.
"After windows 7 .microsoft is dead to me."
Me too. XP was and 7 is a very good running mature and reliable operating system. 8 is an absolute f****** nightmare. server 08 is a more than decent server operating system while 2012 is something less so.
those of us in the business will be forced to continue dealing with Microsoft as long as the majority of business applications are written for it.
Pray that changes.
Yes. However, more and more vmware appliances are being built on top of *nix and I've managed to migrate a signifcant amount of the backends I manage away from MS. MS had their Netware 4 moment a while back and I've been pruning the servers every since. What I do have are 2008R2 and Win7 and only because of .NET and SQL. I walked away from Exchange at 2007 and haven't looked back. Mind you, I deal with <250 users per client.
Did you prune any (Banyan) Vines from your servers? I liked Netware before NDS.
One NOS I never worked with. Was it as ugly as LANtastic?
I am working on KVM right now, and am liking what I see. VMWare ESx is so effing expensive. But I agree, if I can move backend stuff onto linux VMs which are virtuallized in KVM also on linux, it's freaking win-win. Some day I will look at Active Directory migration.
I've still got XP. I started on DOS 3.0, way back in the day. XP is good. I'll stay with it as long as possible. Don't like the newer stuff.
You should at least TRY Win 7. I think you'll like it.
Have tried them all, Still prefer XP the most, and am still running it on 2 machines. 7 is ok, but I still like XP better, probably because I am so used to the traditional Windows formats going all the way back to 3.1.
You realize they haven't patched new XP vulnerabilities since April?
You realize they haven't patched new XP vulnerabilities since April?
You probably have the worlds biggest collection of viruses and back doors and key scanners in the world.
I didn't update or patch XP from 2005 to 2011, when I finally switched to 7. Didn't have a single issue. Have a good hardware firewall, don't click on stupid stuff.
I've still got a copy of DOS 1.0 in the cupboard ;-)
l like Win7 but based on the daily up-dates it appears they're still working on it.
true, but the updates with windows xp and 7 are pretty seamless.
Where you notice a huge difference is all of a sudden, in windows 8, the updates are way more frequent, and don't always 'take'... XP is good, windows 7 really is a bit better[ but not really worth the upgrade, sure]... and most of what they are doing now is basically just to track your user data.
Maybe they have too many h1Bs doing their coding these days.
Try Win7 on a dual boot machine and I will show you how seamless this update horseshit really is.
I haventy had any trouble on 3 different laptops now, myself - can I ask what the specs are and what trouble you had?
I suppose theres good arguments for XP, I think I like the 7 interface/appearance more, etc.
Anyway, next time I might go for a macbook. mostly just because I never had one and I like playing with new shit...
This. LILO gets in the way. Why they need to write crap on the BCD and crap allover the boot volume is beyond me but there it is. MS consistently behaves like they are the only thing on the computer.
I loved XP and had no intention of changing to anything else. Then my computer died, and I got a new one with Win7. I hated it at first, but after I tweaked a few things to make it more like XP, I was fine with it. Then that laptop died last year, and I got a new one with Windows 8. Holy Mother of God, I hated that as much as Vista. Maybe more. It crashed right away, and my husband convinced me to get a Macbook. Long story short, it took a little getting used to, but I love it. I'm afraid to update it, because someone on the previous page said the new Yosemite is horrible. LOL. But I won't be going back to Microsoft, that is for sure.
ever consider purchasing an XP disc and license to load on whatever laptop you use ?
"I think I like the 7 interface/appearance more"
When I first encountered Windows 7 the first thing I thought was they'd ripped off a KDE version of 5 years prior but without any of the functionality. Not to mention the 'aero' bullshit that would need a supercomputer to run using windows where as Linux would do the same effects using a decade old computer.
Ding. the voice of sanity.
Why the fuck do we need to update every five minutes anyway???
I often visit remote locations and the last thing I want is a computer that doesn't work because it is trying to "update". The internet is NOT everywhere. I need something that is reliable and doesn't need the net.
My rudest introduction to Win8 was when it stopped working for six days. What really surprised me was when it started working again. What was it trying to do for all that time?
Completing your NSA file.
I turn off anything that updates automatically (if possible). I hate having a computer update every five minutes. Mine is set to be updated manually.
me too. odd thing is adobe. it is set 'never to check', but it bugs me about every 3 weeks to update flash or reader.
there's two companies you don't want on your computer, at all. Microshit and Adobe. If you install Linux Mint, which is point and click, you get a .pdf reader with it. I tried Adobe's Linux flash; but the fucking thing kept adding on megs and megs of memory space with no explanation; so I un-installed it and use the Linux flash player. It's pretty obvious Adobe is listening in, or something.
One of the big reasons to upgrade to Win & is adding ram to your 'puter. iirc XP hits a wall at 2GB? You need the 64 bit version of 7 if you need lots of ram. If you are just do surfing and email on an older machine, stay with XP.
XP runs sweet with 2GB, but IIRC 3GB is the limit on 32-bit.
My hp xw6400 runs vista 64bit on 16gb ram. I've been tempted to go to win7 on it since I use it on my laptop and it works well. Not really a big techie, but I do play with them some. Biggest advantage of the workstation desktop is the multiple screens.
"Windows XP was great. I think Windows 7 was even better."
Microsoft is the only company that actually removes useful features from its software. Windows 7 Sucks. for instance they rename the folders (ie Documents/My Documents/Library). They still doubt support long filepaths (> 260 characters) which is super anonying when with NAS shares. Windows 7 is windows Vista with some Pig Libstick slapped on. MS and Apple continue to dumb down there systems making them nearly impossible to manage or service.
I agree the renaming of things, and relocating them is irritating, but I do like Win 7 better than XP. I see both frequentl, as I've been supporting software and computers for years. But whether you like XP or 7, the nice thing is there is plenty of support for them out on the internet.
"But whether you like XP or 7, the nice thing is there is plenty of support for them out on the internet. "
IE is a joke and it gets worse every year. At best IE works for about 15 to 20 minutes before it crashes. Then it auto-restarts causing an infinite crash-restart on a web-page it can't handle. The sad thing there is are still a huge number of web sites that need IE to run as they don't alwasy work with Chrome, Fox, etc. For the most part IE on XP did work much better than IE on Win7. The problem is that not all machines have other browers installed. So if your working on a Users PC that only has IE, your pretty much screwed.
The remove one of the most useful tools in Window 7. "Telnet" it was a easy way to test if an IP service was running on a remote machine. i would run into users unable to connect to a remote system and I used telenet {machine address} [Port} to see if the remove service was reachable. Now you have to RDP into another box that has telent or other tools on the remote box which is not always feasible if your working offsite or at a residence, etc.
The Start Menu sucks. on XP the "Run.." option was default. now you have to go to properties and enable it. Its a pain if your constantly working on other users machines or RDPing to PC's or Servers (with Win2008). The only think more anonying was Win2K,XP Personalized menu, which was just a way to Frack with your sanity. Every fracking machine had a different menu organization.
Lets not forget that every OS EXCEPT MS uses the forward slash in paths. Most annoying if you use other OSs (Unix, Linux, CP/M, AS400, VAX, URL's, etc).
I could easily write a 50 pages on Win7 Problems. Don't bother trying to defend Microsoft or Windows. Its a lost cause.
Sorry, but Windoze 7 is mostly eye-candy. They shoulda just improved Windows XP. Instead, they had to prove that Microshaft could implement their own version of Compiz.
The thing is, that's exactly what people were saying when XP came out and at the time sticking with 98SE. I still remember the comments as though it was yesterday "it looks like something a pre school kid would use" "did some bubblegum chewing kid design this interface" "it's playschool" and on and on
Its all relative. Windows 7 is fantastic - compared to Windows 8. Windows XP is great, compared to Vista.
IMHO Windows perfectly reflects the worldview and motivations of Bill Gates: Windows is the software equivalent of a malevolent sociopath whose intention is to keep people ignorant and under his control.
I moved away from Windows about 8-10 years ago, but recently have had to go back to it to set up a game machine for my kid. (Steam is coming, but it needs to gell a bit), try out Windows virtual machines under Linux KVM, and set up some 802.1x authentication at work.
It was like stepping into a timewarp. What an infantile, primative, poorly implemented, insecure piece of shit Microsoft is, whether Windows XP, 7, 8, 8.1, or extrapolating, 10. They do not play well with other systems on the net, they steal opensource software, modify it poorly, and they hide what they did - and the Microsoft way of doing software and systems is just crazy, as in stupid crazy. They add and drop features on a whim, and are really late in picking up important network protocols (802.1x is a perfect example: under Android,Linux, and MacOS, it just works and has for years. Windows is just now getting around to including a fuller feature set of EAP in 8.1 - it makes my blood boil).
Linux is a breath of fresh air, and has really grown up - the same basic paradigm I learned with UNIX thirty years ago is still going strong, and I can move between a Raspberry Pi, my Android cell phone and tablet, my home entertainment movie streamer, a Mac, and of course Linux without puzzling about what combination of guis windows and keyclicks are necessary on each Windows version in order to get things done...
Don't get me wrong - Windows has its place. Dumb people need computers too...
Windows XP was great"---Duck meet Penguin; you are going to be amazed. install Linux Mint in whatever it is; and you'll never look back.
The civilian version of the A10 mated to the Osprey .
You see why
https://www.academia.edu/8942403/The_Hysterical_Focus_is_your_friend_
Who is Andre and why?
He was right about this.
Salvino Armolo D'Armati :
The most influential human in the last thousand years
http://andreswhy.blogspot.com/search?updated-min=2008-01-01T00:00:00-08:00&updated-max=2009-01-01T00:00:00-08:00&max-results=50
"Historically , no society has survived unchanged after mass-literacy .
Revolutions come from the middle classes" .
"Windows 10 - We finally fixed everything"
Is this what they use for the Algos?
Let me be the first to say:
Fuck you microsoft!
You won't be the last.
I second the motion.
Naaah, people were saying that on BBS's back in the early 90's on what MS did to DR DOS ;)
windows 10: a window into your computer for the nsa.
Windows XP: prerooted for the FBI & CIA. The NSA didn't share their problems just logging right in.
I wonder how many Windows 10 machines I'll have to upgrade to Windows 7?
Probably about as many as I had to upgrade to Windows XP from Vista... A whole bunch...
Patch 2 wasn't so bad.
I agree. Vista with Service Pak 2 is at least serviceable, but I still prefer XP.
If you like your suffering, you can keep your suffering; but LINUX EXISTS. and it works. Jesus Christ.
the picture made me laugh...but water flew out of my nose on yours...good job SG...
We do it right because we do it 10 times?
LMAO! - We only have to do it twice!
shit code written by useless indians, i wouldn't even bother pirating it much less pay actual money for it.
Where the fuck is Winders 9????????????????
Windows 8 was so bad they had to skip a number.
I wonder who came up with the brilliant idea of removing the start button in windows 8?
It was a crazy idea, especiallly since the Stones had a song about it, "Start Me Up".
I don't know who it was, but I could have choked the life out of the person when I tried Windows 8. Luckily, it crashed, and I took that POS back to Best Buy and got a Macbook. Microsoft is dead to me.
Word's going around that a lot of third-party software checks whether the version starts with "Windows 9" to see if it's running on "Windows 95 or Windows 98". "Windows 9" would have caused Y2K-scale problems.
Those programmer sure are smart. Let's use two digits for the year. Let's use a check for version that only looks at the first number.
Hey, wait, back in the day they had winders 1 on 51/4 floppies. What if the programmers set it up to see 10 as 1? WTF!
Didn't you see the story in the trade press? They explained why us mere mortals won't get Windows 9:
http://www.infoworld.com/article/2613504/microsoft-windows/microsoft-win...
Thanks.
[This is an April Fools' story. It is fiction, though it contains facts. -- Ed.]
Krugman broke it to generate GDP.
Everyone is looking forward to installing it in 4 years when they have to.
I am sure that compared to Windows 12 or whatever version will be the current by then, Windows10 will be a huge improvement.
Thats what happens when the low bidder outsources your critical systems to your competion.
hhmm, ... did the dude yesterday worrying about the FR trying to land a jet on a football field know about this plane ... maybe, just maybe
It should read, "we finally fixed everything so that it is easier to monitor your computer."
I'm testing the Windows 10 Technical Preview; it's an improvement over Windows 8, but Microsoft insists on displaying the Media Hub as part of the "Start" menu, lists the mass media crap before the useful programs, and insists on calling everything "Apps".
The control panel and useful things for actually working the computer are two or three levels buried still.
If they had half a brain they'd have a "business" version that didn't have the media crap and was designed for work and getting things done - and a "home" version that was for the dopes that can't read or type and watch cat videos all day.
This girl needs the home version, and a good boning:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sP4NMoJcFd4 ("I love cats")
Wow, that is one fucked up female. Cat people blow my mind.
http://www.twincities.com/ci_11684221
Windows 3.1 (Released 1992)
https://www.kirsle.net/creativity/articles/doswin31.png
Windows 8 (released 2012)
http://www.pcadvisor.co.uk/reviews/windows/3284198/microsoft-windows-8-r...
Not much of a difference, except that the boot time of windows 3.1 was much faster.
Keyboard from hospital computer in Idiocracy :
http://empcollective.org/wp/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/idiocracy305.jpg
Actually, this is a better picture for comparison:
http://cf.broadsheet.ie/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/windows8.jpg
The only problem I ever had with 3.1 was getting printers to print when told. Oh, and footers in Wordperfect were a complete bitch.
Windows 10 - New and improved with over 50% of your CPU dedicated to real-time security patch updates
I'm currently testing a laptop with Linux (Ubuntu 14 something) preinstalled. It's incredible how much productive time you can gain because there are updates only every few months - mainly for useability enhancements and not because of hackers blasting holes in the OS weekly like Windows - and you don't need an antivirus software. There is plenty of software available like Libre Office which is pretty much MS office compatible.
Just installed the 32 bit version OpenSuse 13.1 on an old MSI Netbook that came with XP. Installed flawlessly and everything worked except the camera that I never used anyway. Only problem is the fan stops running after a few min and the thing gets hot as hell(did the same running XP so it must be a hardware issue).
"Only problem is the fan stops running after a few min and the thing gets hot as hell(did the same running XP so it must be a hardware issue)."
Likely an issue with the machines BIOS. try flashing the BIOS.
Those laptop CPU fans wear out, bearings are probably shot.
If you're handy you can replace the fan for cheap before you cook the CPU or get reboots from overheating.
Try booting into the BIOS as someone else suggested - fan should run continuously there - would eliminate a power saving fan throttle down in the Operating System.
I replaced the fan in a friend's old HP laptop that had XP - found it online shipped from China for $10 total.
But yes, the Linux crowd has done a good job of getting drivers and installs up to speed and most any Linux distro runs well on even old hardware.
If you like your old laptop, you can probably extend the life (and perhaps run OK even without an internal fan) if you get a good laptop cooler pad
These can keep the chassis amazingly cool, so the internal laptop fan doesn't have to run all the time)
I loaded Zorin 7 and upgraded to Zorin 8 (ubuntu) on one of my laptops back in March or April. You can make a bootable USB drive and run linux right off the stick.
I really like Linux but my trading platforms are windows based, (WINE)<> Linux transfer program is still clunkey and slow.
Here's the link. http://zorin-os.com/
To make a bootable USB drive, here's the link > http://www.pendrivelinux.com/universal-usb-installer-easy-as-1-2-3/
Remember to change the "boot order" in your BIOS to external drive.
Oracle Virtualbox
(install a licensed and fully compatible MicroShitty OS within Linux that only runs when you need it, but does actually run)
I run Win7 with MetaTrader, MetaStock, Quantrix, Quickbooks, AutoDesk (CAD), Adobe Acrobat Pro, various ballistics programs, and an antique version of Lotus Improv just fine.
(As an added bonus because the of processor similarity between by my laptops and desktop, the USB3 drive with my Virtualbox images is portable between machines after some griping about finding new hardware.)
For everything else there's Linux.