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No More "Dog Dung Vacuums" As SkyMall Files For Bankruptcy
In what will likely end the hopes and dreams of many air travellers hoping to pick up the latest crystal-encrusted iphone cufflinks, upright sleeper, hiccup stick, or dog dung vacuum; Commercial Bankruptcy Investor reports that the companies behind the SkyMall catalogs has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. This news comes as Xhibit - SkyMall's parent company - sees its stock price collapse and December's news that Southwest Airlines (which accounted for at least 7% of SkyMall's sales) would no longer distribute the catalogs. On the bright side, any liquidation is great for those looking to pick up a Diamond Jubilee Queen and Corgi statuette or a Doll-House styled cat litter...
As Commercial Bankruptcy Investor reports,
Recent SEC filings by Xhibit Corp., the parent company of SkyMall, may provide some clues as to the problems that the company is facing. Last week, the company made the following disclosure in a Form 8-K filing:
On January 16, 2015, Xhibit Corp. (“Xhibit” or the “Company”), the parent corporation of SkyMall, LLC, announced that it suspended operation of SkyMall’s retail catalog business, which represents a significant portion of the Company’s current consolidated revenue. The Company currently intends to continue SkyMall’s other business operations, including its online retail business, as it explores available strategic alternatives for the SkyMall business. In conjunction with the reduction in operations, the Company terminated approximately 31% of its workforce, the bulk of whom were employed in the Company’s call center operations. The Company cannot predict the impact on sales of the suspension of catalog operations, because a significant portion of catalog generated merchandise sales is believed to be placed by consumers through SkyMall’s website and these sales are not separately tracked. The Company believes that the near-term impact on merchandise sales will be substantial, and will likely increase as the duration of the suspension continues.
The Company determined that it lacked sufficient available capital resources to continue implementing its business transformation plan which had been underway since early 2014, and that no viable debt or equity financing currently is available on terms acceptable to the Company.
The Company has engaged CohnReznick Capital Market Securities, LLC to explore a possible sale and other strategic options for the Company. The Company is actively assessing its strategic options, including a potential filing under Chapter 11 of the Federal Bankruptcy Code.
In addition, the company also disclosed in December 2014 that Southwest Airlines would no longer distribute SkyMall catalogs on their flights. Southwest had accounted for seven percent of SkyMall’s “net merchandise sales” but the “actual negative impact of removing the in-flight catalog from Southwest flights on SkyMall’s net merchandise sales could be greater than 7%” according to Xhibit.
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It might be time to look out for fire-sales of the following must-have items...
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Just about ready to order that sweet diamond encrusted rolling guillotine from you too, dang it.
If you held that thing while you pound your meat it might be very painful
Aw cmon ZH... this is comedy gold, it should literally turn into an epic comment section. People must be off this Friday or something.
If they had a store in Camden, NJ, the meat pounder would make the company's numbers for the rest of the year.
Ratchet up the 'knockout game' to the next level, bitchez.
Damn, and I was hoping they'd expand the Thia mail order bride section.
Now I'm just gonna not fly anymore.
This is how I find out that the warranty on my motorized tie rack is voided? On ZH?
Actually the "meat tenderizer" brass knukles looks kind of useful.
Just the thing to do a little tenderization / attitude adjustment on a mugger. And has plausible deniability. Hey officer, I'm just taking to my cooking class!
The only assholes who would possibly be interested in buying any of this tacky overpriced crap are either flying in Gulfstreams, or are the 4th Kardashian sister you never heard about.
You obviously never purchased the affordable "Nite-Lite" slippers, or Beer coaster t-shirt.
I can lay on my couch with a beer resting on my navel coaster shirt - while watching football.
Thank you SkyMall! Rest in peace.
Well then excuse my lack of knowledge on the subject. In that case they should be putting their catalouges in Air Force One [& offering Wookie combs, butt plugs, & chicken&waffle scented toiletries].
I can definitely repurpose that knuckle meat pounder.
Kanye West already beat you to that idea.
Bill Engvall quietly sobs...
But, but, but the economy is in full recovery and surging ahead......
'The shadow of crisis has passed.'
Don't think so- he was confused- that was Reggie's cock swinging in front of his face.
Apparently NOT if your business is in the clouds. Then the shadows remain.
cant wait to get the wife that blowjob neck brace
Don't forget the optional head top tray attachment for your beer!
Or scotch..
What? Me sexist!?
Nahhhh..
"Don't tell me you don't know how to do a blowjob dammit, get down there & CONCENTRATE!"
~Andrew Dice Clay
Suck Mildred! Suck! Blow is only a figure of speech.
Love your username there 'Wildfire' :-)
That's racissst.... I don't know why. I just felt like saying it. Everybody else does.
The "t" only occurs if you're using a cyrillic alphabet language.
Thanks mask!! Just spewed coffee all over my keyboard. You have a sick mind, but funny neverthless.
china halt commerce with eu today.
capital control in eu on mondey?
I thought Skymall was an arm of the TSA responsible for malling passengers in flight. I predict rampant smoking in the bathrooms like in the good old days...
.gov better bail them out before we end up with swanks in the streets.
Shit, what am I going to read on the plane?
Shit, what am I going to read on the plane?
I've got a warehouse full of "Invisible Pedestrian" Halloween Costumes (Ages 5-12) you can have on the cheap.
If interested contact pullmyfinger@gmail attn: Sid.
Noooo, say it isn’t so. I’ll miss those catalogues. It was fun leafing through them and figuring out the fundamental flaw in every product, i.e., the reason it was practically useless and neither Brookstone nor even the Dollar Store would try to sell it. Funny, in all my days of flying I never once saw a passenger using one of those tote bags that converts into a laptop stand and portable office. Nothin like trying to concentrate on a spreadsheet or compose a memo at the terminal gate with three screaming kids and constant messages on a burned out P.A. system blaring in the background. Alas, that apparently didn’t stop some consumers from buying them or the company wouldn’t have lasted as long as it did.
Xhibit? LOL!!! Xzibit would be pleased. "Yo dawg. I heard you wanna sell Skymall, so we put a Skymall in your Skymall, so you can shop while you shop!"
Could it be a sign that consumers don't want useless crap anymore?
I'll never get that submarine now. Yes they had a small sub for sale around $80,000, I think, the last time I flew.
It's chapter 11, not 7. They will return better than ever! /s
I hope this doesn't mean they won't honor the extended warranty I bought for my remote-controlled, solar-powered spy-camera corkscrews.
Oh shit! I hope this doesn't mean I can't order that sweater made out of live kittens. I've heard that those are SO soft and warm!
I did buy my laser pointer from SkyMall way back, like fifteen years ago. That thing is STILL state of the art in terms of power to size.
I pound my meat barehanded.
sign of the times. who's next? time to short brookstone and sharper image?
i think the new "thing" is rental of storage units to put all the trash you bought from skymall in the last decade......
Really? There were people that actually brought that stuff?
I thought that the triple-ripple butt plug that played "God Save the Queen" with a GPS locating device would surely keep the company afloat for years.....
hehehehehheheheheheheheh
I'll always remember the Elvis head Sno Cone machine.
we must bail them out to prevent a skymall GAP
I got a prototype poop vacuum from one of my bar customers to try out. Somehow, he was involved with it's manufacture. I took it to the animal shelter where I also worked to test it. I dubbed it The Crapolator. Mostly, you had to tease the poop with a shovel to get it to free up and get sucked into the machine. A blade of grass attached may as well have been rebar holding it down. It reminded me of when you vacuum over and over something that refuses to be sucked up, so you pick it up and throw it down again in order to give it one last chance to obey.
A pile of crap ain't no piece of string....