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Greek Caption Contest And Complete Overnight Summary

Tyler Durden's picture




 

If you thought the Dijsselbloem-Varoufakis 'exit' was uncomfortable; watching Jean-Claude "when it's serious, you have to lie" Juncker grab Alexis Tsipras' hand in an awkward solidarity gesture as they ambled off stage today was eye-gouging... Perhaps the biggest news overnight was Varoufakis comment that GREECE `WILL NEVER SEEK FINANCIAL AID' FROM RUSSIA but broadly speaking conversations continue with "no change" - Greek FinMin Varoufakis told ECB's Draghi about his "government’s utter and unwavering determination that it can’t possibly be business as usual in Greece," and The IMF has stated that there has been no discussion with the Greek government on a change to the framework. Varoufakis is on his way to meet Germany's Schaeuble next.

 

The 'awkwardness' begins at around 20 seconds...

*  * *

 

Awkward...

*  *   *

Greek Finance Minister Varoufakis met with ECB Chair Draghi...and nothing changed...

Greek Finance Minister Yanis Varoufakis commented after meeting ECB President Mario Draghi at the ECB headquarters in Frankfurt on Wednesday.

 

Today I had the great honor and privilege to be with Mr Mario Draghi, the president of the ECB, as part of this tour of ours, the purpose of which is to communicate with our partners both in major European capitals as well as of course the great institutions that are supporting the common project of the European monetary and economic union”

 

“Mr Draghi was particularly helpful in outlining the mechanism by which the ECB supports the euro-zone member states including Greece. We had a very fruitful discussion and exchange concerning the constraints, the rules, the regulations, the process by which the relationship between Greece, the euro zone and the central bank must unfold”

 

“I presented him our government’s utter and unwavering determination that it can’t possibly be business as usual in Greece both in terms of the reforms that we need in order to end the various malignancies that have afflicted the Greek economy and society for so many years, and also in terms of the program that has been leading to, or fueling, a debt deflationary crisis in our nation”

 

“We established an excellent line of communication that gives me a great encouragement for the future and I am now proceeding to Berlin where I am extremely eager to meet not with just the finance Minister but with the intellectual force behind the project of European monetary union, Mr Schaeuble. I look forward to it

The IMF explains nothing has changed...

There’s an agreed framework for dealing with Greece’s debt in the current program, and there has been no discussion with the government on a change to the framework, International Monetary Fund says in e-mailed statement.

Varouyfakis finally appears to put a nail in the Russian pivot narrative:

In the same interview, Varoufakis ruled out that Greece planed to seek aid from Russia.

 

“That is not up for debate. We will never ask for financial assistance in Moscow.” [Reuters, Kathimerini]

*  *  *

But the photo-op proves - they are BFFs?

 

*   *   *

We still believe Greek Bank bonds are the most sensitive to the sentiment shifts and while it bounced, it is still dramatically lower...

 

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Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:50 | 5742664 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

"Why don't you come with me Mr. Tsipras, I got this cool new nail gun I'd like to show you." 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:54 | 5742678 Arius
Arius's picture

"Why don't you come with me Mr. Tsipras, I got this cool new NAZI gun I'd like to show you."

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:55 | 5742688 I am more equal...
I am more equal than others's picture

 

 

 

There is a room in the back, we can do it Greek style. Come, let me lead the way......

 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:59 | 5742701 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Tie their feet together and see how well they do.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:45 | 5742858 Cap Matifou
Cap Matifou's picture

Juncker did the same shit to Orban just a few days ago.

Hungarian PM Orban is dragged away by Commision President Juncker after handshake

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:03 | 5742906 Eirik Magnus Larssen
Eirik Magnus Larssen's picture

He is a strange man.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:04 | 5742912 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

He is something like the Drunken Master of EU Politics

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:06 | 5742920 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

Is that like going hunting with Dick Cheney? 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:57 | 5743079 John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

"Tie their feet together and [throw them into the ocean]."

FIFY

 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:00 | 5742898 agNau
agNau's picture

"Ring around the rosy
Pocket full of posies
Ashes, ashes
We all fall down"

The New Plague.

What I call our systemic breakdown.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:06 | 5742732 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

I would love to play with an authentic MP-40, or the MP-44.  

Shoot, I knew a guy here in Germany who found a SG-42 in the floor of an attic when we was remodeling a house about 7 years ago.  House was 100 years old plus.  It had the alumnium stock on it, and the Wreathed Eagle and a serial number onit.  

Needless to say, owning this in Germany is super illegal on many fronts, so he smuggled it into the US and sold it on Gun Broker.  Got north of $20k for it, which paid for his kitchen, and he saved a piece of history.   

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:15 | 5742755 Arius
Arius's picture

go watch N24 to understand what you are ...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:34 | 5742805 Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Owning a SG 42 in Germany is not as "super illegal" as many think. It´s not considered a "Kriegswaffe" since it was introduced before 1945. Only problem it´s a full automatic weapon. But if you do some modifications and get approval for this you can own it. It´s a historical artifact after all. But hey, `Muricans are crazy for that kind of weapons in good conditions. And the dealer got twice the price or more for it, believe me.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:38 | 5742824 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

Er hat auch den Hakenkreuz drauf.  Von was ich verstehe, er könnte ihn nicht verkaufen. 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:50 | 5742876 Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Guess the problem here is if he is/was the rightful owner of the gun. Owner of the gun was the "Deutsche Reich", so most likely the rightful owner 7 years ago was the Federal Republic of Germany. But hey, i would have done the same as your friend. Interesting story though.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:02 | 5742904 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

+1 correct, property of the Third Reich, never legally in private hands

Like in mine, I had the whole set of all guns/mgs/pistols produced during the time the GröFAZ was in charge. Thankfully, those were excellent presents, and one worry less. The granades, I had to dispose of, they were a bit dangerous, then after too many years their explosives can become instable, according to my expert friends

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:48 | 5743057 Unix
Unix's picture

unstable indeed...I had a Mauser with the eagle and swastica on it, in fine condition too, the bullets were 70 years old as well, they were err, green with envy...cleaned it well, all mechanisms checked but damn thing jammed every time I fired it, what a piece of shit. 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:46 | 5743585 Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Have two Mausers 98k, and they work perfect, i use one of them even for hunting. Your 70 year old ammo/bullets jammes, well, ... ever tried new ammo, 8*57IS is still in production. You didn´t use 8*57 IRS don´t you?

 

Btw, i found some 8*57IS ammo a few month ago produced in 1916. I don´t dare to use that ammo in my gun of course.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:01 | 5742707 no more banksters
no more banksters's picture

Alexis don't smile, kick the ass of this plutocrat puppet.

Meet Mr. junck-puppet:http://x2t.com/Juncker

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:34 | 5743554 willpoi
willpoi's picture

"BEND OVER TO THE FRONT, TOUCH YOUR TOES AND WIGGLE WITH IT"

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:35 | 5743555 willpoi
willpoi's picture

"BEND OVER TO THE FRONT, TOUCH YOUR TOES AND WIGGLE WITH IT"

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:31 | 5742813 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:49 | 5742879 Unix
Unix's picture

Ahh, queen envy, the Hitlery Fat Lady montage, and does a bear shit in the woods meme, nice one William!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:21 | 5742956 tonyw
tonyw's picture

fuck you malakas

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:44 | 5743047 Unix
Unix's picture

but but I don't have one of those!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:49 | 5743060 noben
noben's picture

Looks like a former priest and former Altar boy.

Guess what happens?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:18 | 5743480 weyes1
weyes1's picture

A fertile mind can be a wonderful thing...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:47 | 5742658 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

it took a week, but the bankers got the greeks to reassure the "markets". how many zeros were deposited in Tsipras' bank account to get this???

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:05 | 5742725 Jaspergers
Jaspergers's picture

"When it's important (to get elected) sometimes you have to lie" -Tsipras

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:08 | 5742735 taraxias
taraxias's picture

It's not the zeros deposited in Tsipras's account, it's the zeros that got withdrawn from Greek banks leaving them totally bankrupt and illiquid without an ECB backstop which made the Greeks toe the line again this quickly. It's not Merkel they have to worry about, it's the evil Draghi (as Berlusconi found out).

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:51 | 5742669 Vincent Vega
Vincent Vega's picture

Dear Greece,

Just fucking default and move on. It is your best option.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:59 | 5743095 John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

But but but...

Who will pay for the socialist utopia that's been promised?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:53 | 5742670 forwardho
forwardho's picture

Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:54 | 5742679 oudinot
oudinot's picture

 I AM NOT REALLY GAY, BUT IF YOU FORGIVE ALOT OF  DEBT I WILL DEFINITELY SUCK YOUR COCK.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:56 | 5742691 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Is Greece going to default?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:43 | 5742863 Unix
Unix's picture

Heck no, they will fall in line, you watch. If they don't, they're dead, pure and simple. Right now the Greek FinMin is running around to all the talking heads, like a chicken with his head cut off...and the morbid thing is, the IMF, Troika, etc, are quite amused.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:03 | 5742692 Bill of Rights
Bill of Rights's picture
"Tsipras, take my hand...let me show you where the suitcase full of money is located "

 


Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:59 | 5742697 Chief Falling Knife
Chief Falling Knife's picture

This is shaping up to look like elections here in America(and most everywhere else), bluster, bloviate, get elected, change nothing. 

 

Not that they were ever going to do anything sane to begin with over there, but I figured they would at least change something.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:58 | 5742700 10mm
10mm's picture

Holding hands. Gotta be some type of ritual shit.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:00 | 5742702 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

Caption:

"Mein Führer, I can walk!"

Dr. Strangelove right before everything blows up.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:41 | 5742852 Unix
Unix's picture

yeeeeeehaaaaaaaw! Rowdy to the rescue

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:02 | 5742706 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

In summary, Yanis told 'fuck you Draghi!' in a very polite way.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 09:59 | 5742708 iclouding
iclouding's picture

I'm making over $7k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life. This is what I do... http://goo.gl/ezLA00

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:40 | 5742849 Unix
Unix's picture

damn, you again...go away already!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:17 | 5743482 StandardDeviant
StandardDeviant's picture

All together now...  abuse [at] zerohedge.com

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:02 | 5742713 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

Tspiras is definately not one of them. He is very uncomfortable with all this shit. That was very cringey.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:56 | 5742888 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

He is, now. One of the "EuroCrats". Has the Greek vote in the all-powerful EU Council and all that

and so he gets the privilege of all those kisses and hugs and hand-holding of their secretary-in-chief, Juncker. Hey, what's a few kisses under continental europeans?

I remember the kind of kisses that were normal in the Warsaw Pact. Nothing for the faint of heart (or for American/Brits), those kisses on the open mouth

Juncker is famous for his touchy touch, btw. Usually a sign he needs a bottle of wine just to get away from his extreme lucidity. Or perhaps he already had two, or three, which brings his brain a bit more at the same level of all the others in the room. Just recently he was all over the Swiss minister, she was a bit... flummoxed

But at least Juncker does not assault people from behind the way Bush did on Merkel. And does not introduce dogs in the same room where she is, the famous dog-phobic, the way Putin did, recently

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:02 | 5743107 John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

gross

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:04 | 5742718 nixy
nixy's picture

".... and the really funny thing is ...... we'll both get paid, with or without the taxpayer.."

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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..........or wil they?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:49 | 5743061 edotabin
edotabin's picture

Why question certainty?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:11 | 5742740 wissen dass scheiBe
wissen dass scheiBe's picture

"And how would YOU like to earn 7,000€ a month the hard way?"

 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:11 | 5742746 SharkBit
SharkBit's picture

We're off to see the Wizard...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742844 Unix
Unix's picture

We're off to see the Lizard...

Fixed it for ya!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:12 | 5742747 all-priced-in
all-priced-in's picture

IMHO what Greece wants

 

Is to first have a large chunk of debt written off --50% to 75%.

 

Then - immediately after the write off be given large loans so they have the cash to give everyone that has a job a raise, hire more government employees, restore pensions, do public works projects, develop other government controlled business and I am sure a few pie in the sky projects. How about some high speed rail or a sports stadium:-O.

 

The Greek plan can be boiled down to - don't make me pay back any of the money I have already borrowed - but give me more money to spend.

 

 

 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742841 Unix
Unix's picture

LOL, Greece will just give it away, to the welfare folks, more govt workers, etc...same as it ever was! Retire at 45 and bask in the sun.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:04 | 5743112 John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

nailed it

And it might well work.

Despite the fact that it would make economic sense to jettison Greece from the EU, Brussels doesn't want that precedent set.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:18 | 5742765 iclouding
iclouding's picture

I'm making over $7k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life. This is what I do... http://goo.gl/ezLA00

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:26 | 5742790 Fíréan
Fíréan's picture

SPAM !

will someone remove this spammer ? please

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:46 | 5742870 Monetas
Monetas's picture

Ever try Spam and goat cheese .... wrapped in grape leaves .... sauteed in olive oil .... with just a touch of garlic ?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:21 | 5743187 Shitgum Suicide
Shitgum Suicide's picture

Have you ever put butter on a pop tart? It's soooo friggin good. If haven't put butter on a pop tart then I really think you should.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742836 Unix
Unix's picture

How, by stealing old folks pensions? Go jump off a pier why don't ya...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:59 | 5743086 HughBriss
HughBriss's picture

Moar spam!  MOAR!!!!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:18 | 5742768 elephant
elephant's picture

Acting coy won't get you any lube.  Just default already.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:22 | 5742777 Salsipuedes
Salsipuedes's picture

Come with me little boy...I'll show you my candy collection...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:26 | 5742795 Rootin' for Putin
Rootin' for Putin's picture

I hope everyone realizes that going to BRICS bank for help and going to Moscow for help are two totally different things.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:27 | 5742803 Nafets93
Nafets93's picture

It's stupid that so much depends on semantics.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:26 | 5742796 Nafets93
Nafets93's picture

I think they look cute together

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:27 | 5742804 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WsSrGWp-ZFE

You knew it was coming sometime.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:36 | 5742827 Unix
Unix's picture

What's that, your hand, whew...chuckles! Aww, how sweet, Junk leading the Greek to the gallows with his shriveled hand, brings a tear to my eye.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:38 | 5742832 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

"I'll grab this prick by the hand and drag him out back and you hit him with the nailgun. It'll be just another tragic suicide."

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:38 | 5742833 Monetas
Monetas's picture

Greek wrestling .... anyone ? 

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742837 gamera9
gamera9's picture

 You sit around here and you spin your little webs and you think the whole world revolves around you and your money. Well, it doesn't, Mr. Junker. In the whole vast configuration of things, I'd say you were nothing but a scurvy little spider!

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:38 | 5742838 gamera9
gamera9's picture

 Double Post

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742842 Grinners
Grinners's picture

"Im not gay, but a bailout is a bailout bitchez"

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:39 | 5742843 Watson
Watson's picture

>>>
Varoufakis comment that GREECE `WILL NEVER SEEK FINANCIAL AID' FROM RUSSIA
<<<

Russia gets permission for a port;
Greece's debts paid off directly by Russia.

Since no Russian money passed into Greek hands, to a lawyer/politician, Greece did not get financial aid.

The question is, do the Greeks just close the deal, or do they give Obama the chance to counter-bid?
And does China have any interest?

Watson

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:52 | 5742883 Chuck DeBongo
Chuck DeBongo's picture

"Well, we've tried leading Greece by the nose and it didn't work. Let's try somewhere else...."

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 10:55 | 5742890 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Just solve the goddamn problem once and for all....During WWII when the German armies were sweeping across western Russia, the Russians dismantled their industrial base, moved it eastwards by railroad cars and then reassembled it.  No hand-wringing or wondering what to do, they ACTED and survived....

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 15:37 | 5744071 thebigunit
thebigunit's picture

Great advice.

But Greece doesn't have an industrial base.

Any other ideas?

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:05 | 5742911 Mike Honcho
Mike Honcho's picture

Hollande relished the moment and said "see, not so easy."

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:07 | 5742922 Anunnaki
Anunnaki's picture

Default or fuck off

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:13 | 5742942 wow thats crazy
wow thats crazy's picture

Hmhmh come with me Mr Tsipras

Let me show you what we will do to you Greek Style in the backroom

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:19 | 5742960 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

This hand holding shit that's so big among these elitist ass hats is seriously creepy to me. Any guy reaches to grab my hand like that and he's getting socked

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:37 | 5743009 thinkmoretalkless
thinkmoretalkless's picture

"Watch that first step...it can be tricky"

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 11:43 | 5743033 nixy
nixy's picture

Or even.....

""I got you babe"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BERd61bDY7k

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:01 | 5743104 1stepcloser
1stepcloser's picture

I learned this hand holding bit from W and the Late King of Saudi Arabia... now where are the little boys...

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:12 | 5743146 mog
mog's picture

GREECE `WILL NEVER SEEK FINANCIAL AID' FROM RUSSIA

 

Big mistake.

BIG!

His best bargaining chip down the pan.

Never say never..................

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:11 | 5743152 monad
monad's picture

You trusted us....

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:22 | 5743196 Debugas
Debugas's picture

Will your grow ?

it sure will

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 12:49 | 5743314 TheShadowKnows
TheShadowKnows's picture

"Varoufakis comment that GREECE `WILL NEVER SEEK FINANCIAL AID' FROM RUSSIA"

 

Perhaps "aid" is the operative word. No beggars bowl. But he didn't say Greece wouldn't set up some sort of mutually beneficial "deal" with Russia.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:05 | 5743404 weyes1
weyes1's picture

Jean-Claude Juncker: "When it's serious, you have to lie" 

Yanis Varoufakis:  "We will never ask for financial assistance in Moscow"

Game theory: What goes around, comes around.  Keep your eye on the ball.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:05 | 5743408 thebigunit
thebigunit's picture

Juncker: "What's money between friends, Alexis.  Can't we just get along? I'll buy lunch. Taco truck?"

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 13:14 | 5743453 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

'I would have preferred a reach-around!'

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 14:06 | 5743699 Last of the Mid...
Last of the Middle Class's picture

lets see, it's my first time, the checks in the mail, and I'll only stick the head of it in.  That pretty much sums it up.

Wed, 02/04/2015 - 19:28 | 5745136 Fedtacular
Fedtacular's picture

"Are you tickling my palm?"

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