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January Payrolls Smash Expectations Rising By 257,000 As Hourly Earnings Surge Most Since November 2008

Tyler Durden's picture




 

So much for expectations that January, missing on 9 out of 10 previous occasions, will miss again, as the BLS just reported that in January a whopping 257K jobs were added, far above the 228K expected, and up from December's 252K which was revised as part of the annual BLS data revision to 329K, a whopping 147K revision! More impressive: the household survey reported that a whopping 759K jobs were created in January.

The unemployment rate rose from 5.6% to 5.7%, above the 5.6% expected.

But most notable, the average hourly earnings surged from last month's -0.2% by a whopping 0.5%, the highest monthly jump in average hourly earnings since November 2008. On an annual basis, the increase was a less impressive 2.2%:

It remains to be seen just how this is happening with mass layoffs in the oil patch, but what is now practically assured is that the Fed will have no choice but to hike as soon as June.

More from the report:

Total nonfarm payroll employment rose by 257,000 in January. Job gains occurred in retail trade, construction, health care, financial activities, and manufacturing. After incorporating revisions for November and December (which include the impact of the annual benchmark process), monthly job gains averaged 336,000 over the past 3 months. (See table B-1 and summary table B. See the note at the end of this news release and table A for information about the annual benchmark process.)

  • Employment in retail trade rose by 46,000 in January. Three industries accounted for half of the jobs added--sporting goods, hobby, book, and music stores (+9,000); motor vehicle and parts dealers (+8,000); and nonstore retailers (+6,000).
  • Construction continued to add jobs in January (+39,000). Employment increased in both residential and nonresidential building (+13,000 and +7,000, respectively). Employment continued to trend up in specialty trade contactors (+13,000). Over the prior 12 months, construction had added an average of 28,000 jobs per month.
  • In January, health care employment increased by 38,000. Job gains occurred in offices of physicians (+13,000), hospitals (+10,000), and nursing and residential care facilities (+7,000). Health care added an average of 26,000 jobs per month  in 2014.
  • Employment in financial activities rose by 26,000 in January, with insurance  carriers and related activities (+14,000) and securities, commodity contracts, and investments (+5,000) contributing to the gain. Financial activities has added 159,000 jobs over the past 12 months.
  • Manufacturing employment increased by 22,000 over the month, including job gains in motor vehicles and parts (+7,000) and wood products (+4,000). Over the past 12 months, manufacturing has added 228,000 jobs.
  • Professional and technical services added 33,000 jobs in January, including increases in computer systems design (+8,000) and architectural and engineering services (+8,000).
  • In January, employment in food services and drinking places continued to trend up (+35,000). In 2014, the industry added an average of 33,000 jobs per month.
  • Employment in other major industries, including mining and logging, wholesale trade, transportation and warehousing, information, and government, showed little change over the month.
 

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Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:36 | 5751220 NOTW777
NOTW777's picture

LOL but we still need negative rates

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:44 | 5751264 Burt Gummer
Burt Gummer's picture

Do they really expect people to believe these numbers? But hey if it rubs the markets the right way then mission acomplished, what a fuckin' farcicle fantasy land of bullshit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yloaBw80fV4

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751273 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

It remains to be seen just how this is happening with mass layoffs in the oil patch

 

Ummm.....magic?

 

Perhaps some good old fashioned soviet style propaganda?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751283 CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

The numbers no longer determne te narrative; the narrative determines the numbers.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:50 | 5751290 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

This is an absolutely awesome figure! There’s no playing this down -This is the nail in the coffin for doomer libertarians and zerohedge freaks! The recovery is not only sustaining itself – it’s accelerating, and this specifically because of the work that our congress and Federal Reserve have done to stimulate economic growth.

For those of you who understand economics, today’s figure comes as no surprise. Read today’s article at the Accredited Times for the truth about where jobs really come from:

http://accredited-times.com/2015/02/05/consumers-create-jobs-not-busines...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:51 | 5751294 thepigman
thepigman's picture

everything is awesome......har

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:55 | 5751315 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

When this dropped, someone on the floor started playing the "Everything is awesome" song, and then someone else said "turn Alex Jones off" 

lol

The world is a very strange place right now.  

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751359 rccalhoun
rccalhoun's picture

the government fucked with the numbers to make them beautiful

but if the report was awful, the statistics would stand as printed

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:08 | 5751391 fx
fx's picture

@MillionDollarBonus, you forgot to mark the sarcasm in your post. Otherwise some people may take your statement at face value (even if that may seem very strange to you). I show you below how to properly mark it:

<sarcasm on>The recovery is not only sustaining itself – it’s accelerating, and this specifically because of the work that our congress and Federal Reserve have done to stimulate economic growth.</sarcasm off>

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:15 | 5751439 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Shhhh!

That's the joke.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:22 | 5751486 gonetogalt
gonetogalt's picture

It's nice to see the real MDB back, the link is the tell.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:16 | 5751446 PrayingMantis
PrayingMantis's picture

 

 

.... just a quick reminder ...

 

>>> #1 The Obama administration tells us that 8.69 million Americans are “officially unemployed” and that 92.90 million Americans are considered to be “not in the labor force”. That means that more than 101 million U.S. adults do not have a job right now. <<< http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-01-30/death-american-dream-22-numbers ...

 

... here too ...>>> The Layoffs Begin: ADP Misses, Lowest Since September As "Businesses In The Energy Industries Are Scaling Back Payrolls" <<< http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-02-04/adp-employment-drops-misses-expectations 

 

... and here ... >>> Gallup CEO: "America's 5.6% Unempoyment Is One Big Lie" <<< http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-02-03/gallup-ceo-americas-56-unempoyment-one-big-lie 

 

... and here ... >>> Layoffs Surge 17.6% YoY, Shale State Joblessness Soars, Initial Jobless Claims Rise <<< http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-02-05/layoffs-surge-176-yoy-shale-state-joblessness-soars-initial-jobless-claims-rise 

 

... I think these pretty well sum it up ...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:42 | 5751581 Blano
Blano's picture

Dude, you been here almost as long as me.  Don't you know by now that MDB trying to come off as honest is part of the entertainment? 

Newbies have to learn the hard way like the rest of us.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 11:15 | 5751751 mtl4
mtl4's picture

The current market is like being back in university, getting wasted and going to bed with a 10 only to wake up with a 2......it ain't too pretty when the beer goggles come off.

 

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:07 | 5751365 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

GREAT JOBS REPORT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StTqXEQ2l-Y

Raise Rates, Mr. Yellen!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:53 | 5751303 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

every morning I see that guy across the street holding sign "homeless and hungry" and its real

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:59 | 5751341 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

He must be an American citizen. Illegal aliens know enough to go get free stuff from the government.

I also heard that 262,000 of the 257,000 new jobs were filled by illegal aliens.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:01 | 5751353 Dollarmedes
Dollarmedes's picture

Audit the BLS.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751363 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

Big fan, big fan.  Do not let the Johnny-come-lately imposters take your bit.

We must have a lot of new folks who do not recognize the sarc is strong with this one.

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:06 | 5751382 maneco
maneco's picture

So is that why the Fed Funds target is still at zero?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:20 | 5751473 rogerrabbithole
rogerrabbithole's picture

When Mr. Yellen quits talking bull shit about raising rates and actually does; and when that doesn't crash, or at least begin a slow decent in the housing and stock markets, then I'll admit you're right. Hell, if she raises rates 25 BPs without you and the rest of the stimulus monkies jumping ship, I'll give him a blow job live on CNBC while Cramer smacks my ass. 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:44 | 5751596 Burt Gummer
Burt Gummer's picture

accredited-times, lmfao, that site is pure satirical gold.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:53 | 5751297 ThirteenthFloor
ThirteenthFloor's picture

Can you say manipulation

What industry is hiring ?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:00 | 5751346 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Bureau of Lies and Subterfuge.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:08 | 5751387 freedogger
freedogger's picture

Electric cars must really be taking off with this many people working and oil inventories at record highs.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:23 | 5751490 Blues Traveler
Blues Traveler's picture

Crimson Avenger, exactly,  double upvote....in addition, there is a plethora of part time hourly wage jobs, but virtually no careers. 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:56 | 5751320 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

and the survey says.......we're all winners!!!

The beauty of it all is that there is no way to refute their numbers. Like rating agencies they are paid by those seeking the numbers they produce. Too many bad surveys, and they might just have to find a new "team".

The reality is that everything WE see , hear and generally experience is all anecdotal and therefore meaningless.

Believe what we are told, DO what we are told, and "all will be as right as rain".

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751267 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

LOL but we still need negative rates

"." ;- )

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:46 | 5751271 TrafficNotHere
TrafficNotHere's picture

<= They will be revised down at least 75k

<= The Numbers are Solid

Does anyone really believe these numbers?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751280 Handful of Dust
Handful of Dust's picture
Don’t Buy The “Big Lie”!: Here’s Why The Unemployment Rate May Actually Be 23%

 

 

http://radio.foxnews.com/2015/02/05/dont-buy-the-big-lie-heres-why-the-u...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:59 | 5751338 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

And if you don't trust FOX, see John Williams' shadowstats.com.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:59 | 5751340 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

We should NEVER be surprised to find that we are being lied to. Our surprise should be reserved for those few times when they tell us the truth.

hell they even admit that they NEED to lie to us for our own good.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:14 | 5751434 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

"hell they even admit that they NEED to lie to us for THEIR own good."

 

FIFY

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751288 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

That was predictable now is the time to switch to Greek news as this is the bad boy together with Russia to spoil the party and to be blame after all this BS collapse.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:40 | 5751574 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Total fraud.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:37 | 5751224 madbraz
madbraz's picture

It's official...they don't give a crap anymore if it's believable or not.  just do it.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751270 giovanni_f
giovanni_f's picture

Yes they can.

Consistent reporting is for beginners.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751277 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

I'm convinced these fake numbers and the stock market run are all a lead up to being able to point back in time and say, "we fixed everything, but then ___________ happened and that's why you're all out of work/poor."  They know the sheep have short memories and if they can blame the eventual melt-down on some external force, they will get carte blance from the population to do what "worked" last time, again and again.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751285 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

______________= WAR?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:52 | 5751299 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

That's certainly one of the top contenders in my conspiratorial mind.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:58 | 5751329 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

Yeup.  

I'll leave this here;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qq0ykF2mHgQ

Multiple birds with one stone -- at one time.  

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:05 | 5751377 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

Methinks it'll be a cyber event well before any large scale kinetic event.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:58 | 5751328 dirtyfiles
dirtyfiles's picture

that's precisely the scenario 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:02 | 5751355 booboo
booboo's picture

Yep, "we had this problem licked and on a sustainable path and then................"

History books will be written this way also and any truth will be relegated to the dust bin.

They say therefore we believe. Colleges used to question authority and the narrative, now you are spoon fed horseshit by the plate full and kids lap it up.

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:15 | 5751443 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

PATS PATS PATS

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:37 | 5751225 spastic_colon
spastic_colon's picture

something for everyone with UE up to 5.7

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:37 | 5751226 NOTW777
NOTW777's picture

guess they exclude shale industry - right?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:38 | 5751235 cossack55
cossack55's picture

The shale roofing industry has been slow for many years.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751371 booboo
booboo's picture

so has the "shake" and "slate" roofing industry.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:37 | 5751231 cossack55
cossack55's picture

"A hiking we will go, a hiking we will go, 

long live Mario, a hiking we will...........er ....a cutting we will go"

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:38 | 5751233 maneco
maneco's picture

The Fed needs to convene an emergency meeting after the close of markets today and raise the Fed Funds rate by 100 basis point!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:38 | 5751234 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

CEO's rasised their salaries?  I look around and the lucky one's that still have jobs haven't had a raise for quite awhile.  In fact a few had to accept pay cuts or face layoffs.  I call bullshit on these numbers (well I will always call bullshit on them, but this one is probably the king farce to rule them all).

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:41 | 5751244 giovanni_f
giovanni_f's picture

My thought. The salaries (they measure) increased. Anything decreasing is declared non-salary. Problem solved.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:01 | 5751348 Stained Class
Stained Class's picture

Minimum wage went up in January?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:17 | 5751459 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

By jove, I think you've got it!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:38 | 5751236 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

So this should be market negative because all is well, employment is soaring and we'll need to increase rates so that we don't get away with ourselves.

Ummmmm.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:39 | 5751239 bluestaq
bluestaq's picture

This will be revised lower next month without a doubt.  

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:54 | 5751310 QuarkHopper
QuarkHopper's picture

at what point do they just give up on 'revising' numbers? just tell everyone it's raining pixie dust and leave it at that.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:39 | 5751240 conscious being
conscious being's picture

Burning credibility because the show must go on.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:54 | 5751307 balanced
balanced's picture

I think that ship has sailed. The market doesn't trade on this data due to it being credible as much as it being a queue for the latest to-be-short-lived momentum trade.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:39 | 5751241 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

first things first. the fed will never fucking raise rates because they cant. they have come up with every excuse in the book not too, but we all know the main reason.

 

secondly, isnt it amazing how last year the excuse was the fucking weather, but this year with pretty much the same cold and stormy weather we saw last year, we dont here any fucking excuses.

 

and last thing, the revisions upwards r one big fucking joke. its nice the cnbc can fucking report just a fucking number but with no context. the revisions are prob due to low paying jobs being added during the holiday season.

 

another fucking scam by the fed and government, what the fuck is new on a jobs friday, or any day for that matter

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:51 | 5751295 JMT
JMT's picture

Prove it that it is due to "these low paying jobs being added during the holiday season".. and I always wonder how they even FIND people to work such 'low paying retail' especially when many employees now who work retail complain (mostly on internet websites) how retail "sucks". the customers are "rude" to them, they have to work 12 hours a day and have kids (why the fuck are you popping out kids on a retail salary)

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:51 | 5751296 JMT
JMT's picture

Prove it that it is due to "these low paying jobs being added during the holiday season".. and I always wonder how they even FIND people to work such 'low paying retail' especially when many employees now who work retail complain (mostly on internet websites) how retail "sucks". the customers are "rude" to them, they have to work 12 hours a day and have kids (why the fuck are you popping out kids on a retail salary)

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 11:14 | 5751746 Scoobywan
Scoobywan's picture

Kids are an ATM machine to the poor. Look at the tax return of single mom making 16,000 / year with 4 kids. She'll get another 10,000 every february.

These cost her nothing, 2 meals a day from the school, free healthcare, free daycare, food stamps for weekend food, and rent subsidies.

There is no reason to not just pump out kids if you are poor.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751243 ejmoosa
ejmoosa's picture

So more than 13 million people have been added to the workforce with no real increase in wages.

A central planner's dream come true.

Too damn good to be true in my opinion.

I reject this data for the following reasons:

Salaries are not rising and profits are not growing for the American economy overall.

If you cannot make a profit, you have no reason to hire or expand.

 

I'll add one more reason:  Ask any college graduate on college campuses if they have employers competing for their labors.  Compare that to the times when grads had to sort through the offers.  Then ask yourself why it is different this time around.  

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751286 JMT
JMT's picture

Actually the college grads (recent college grads are doing quite well, especially in the NYC and Boston area).. It is those over 40 or if they have been unemployed for 'too long' (longer than a few months that are completely screwed)... Hiring Managers & HR want those fresh faced recent college grads since they (according to them) are up to date on the latest technology, are 'energetic' and are "fun to be around"...   I heard how it is almost back to the late 1990s... You can graduate from a regular state school and have a multitude of job offers paying 60K or higher...  

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:23 | 5751489 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

That might be true in evil-doer land, but it's the exact opposite everywhere else, as true commerce doesn't need fresh-faced kids to operate on the fringes of legality, then take the blame when the next scam blows up. Instead, the market is saturated with experienced Boomers who can't afford to retire.

Sat, 02/07/2015 - 04:19 | 5755018 theliberalliberal
theliberalliberal's picture

<<--- 77th battalion
<<--- The actual word on the street.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751287 JMT
JMT's picture

Actually the college grads (recent college grads are doing quite well, especially in the NYC and Boston area).. It is those over 40 or if they have been unemployed for 'too long' (longer than a few months that are completely screwed)... Hiring Managers & HR want those fresh faced recent college grads since they (according to them) are up to date on the latest technology, are 'energetic' and are "fun to be around"...   I heard how it is almost back to the late 1990s... You can graduate from a regular state school and have a multitude of job offers paying 60K or higher...  

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:41 | 5751245 I woke up
I woke up's picture

Hard to believe these numbers from the industry I'm in, been thru 3 layoffs in 2 years, if things don't get better we'll be doing another in 3-6 months

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:41 | 5751246 Ghostdog
Ghostdog's picture

We have to take a moment and stop knocking those high paying holiday temp jobs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:41 | 5751247 BullyBearish
BullyBearish's picture

So easy even a caveman could do it...this explains the market's ramp over the last few days as rising interest rates (they HAVE to raise rates) must be seen as GOOD for the market

What remains to be seen is how they will continue to levitate the market as liquidity is withdrawn...besides stock buybacks (which are still going on) and foreign government purchases, could there really be a stealth QE still working under the covers?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:41 | 5751249 dobermangang
dobermangang's picture

Did Brian Williams report those numbers?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751263 maneco
maneco's picture

I think he has been appointed head of the BLS. After all he was able to cover up a lie for over ten years. He is good!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:55 | 5751312 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

I hear they also have Hillary on staff....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHVEDq6RVXc

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:42 | 5751252 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

Shale jobs? We don't need no stinkin' shale jobs!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:42 | 5751253 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

greenshoooooooooootz!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:43 | 5751254 Sanity Bear
Sanity Bear's picture

What's happening is that new "jobs" are being created by shifting hours away from full time workers into part time jobs so that they don't qualify to get the business hit with Obamacare costs.

 

25 jobs at 40 hours/week

enter Obamacare

40 jobs at 25 hours/week

 

presto chango, 15 "new jobs created"!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:47 | 5751275 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Confirmed to me by a San Fransisco restaurant operator last week.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:09 | 5751396 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

All part of the global rebalancing of wages effort. This is not by accident.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:43 | 5751258 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

radio S BK, lay offs in retail think JCP and Sears, consolidation in Office d and on and on - refinery works on strike and payrolls go up? yah I think these are solid numbers..it's bad when they gotta lie so in your face.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:46 | 5751272 unplugged
Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:52 | 5751300 Racer
Racer's picture

They have been telling so many porky pies for so long now they don't know what truth is

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:44 | 5751260 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Any additional  job number is good if you leave the decimal point out.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:44 | 5751261 aliki
aliki's picture

50 or 60% of which were parttime, waiter, waitress, bartender?

not that theres anything wrong with that, but these are not high-quality, high-paying jobs.

need proof? home ownership continues to plummet.

oh, and how far we've fallen when guys in my office are trying to guess the job # before the print hits, i say 235k and 2 guys bark-out "too-high" (consensus here was slightly sub-200k).

anyone remember when we used to print 400-500k like they were pancakes? my how far we've fallen. when 257k is considered "knocking it out of the park" all i think of is starve a man long enough and a saltine will taste like surf & turf :(

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751265 vegas
vegas's picture

We go through this NFP "circus" every month; and every month the Bureau of Lies & Statistics [BLS] absolutely must project rosy economic activity for Emperor Goebbels and his crew. Nothing matters except the iullusion [more like delusional] the FED and everybody else in the political & financial elite have everything under control. What a fucking joke.

 

www.traderzoo.mobi

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751266 Jack Daniels Esq
Jack Daniels Esq's picture

And Obama is American

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751268 kristian01
kristian01's picture

ZH's algos feverishly reworking their low-rate-low-wage-deflationary-spiral-"let's screw with chart scales"-"January always misses"-"BLS is corrupt" narrative.  The clock is ticking guys...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:45 | 5751269 unplugged
unplugged's picture

LIES - LIES GODDAMMIT !  - JUST MORE FUCKING PROPAGANDA - did I mention LIES ?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:47 | 5751276 Son of Captain Nemo
Son of Captain Nemo's picture

Ohhhh..........

Can't wait for March w/ that Fed "announcement"!...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:47 | 5751279 wmbz
wmbz's picture

Hot damn! It's better than expected.

DOW blast off straight through 18,000. Who could have imagined such good news, almost seems unreal! Can't be though, gubmint sez so.

I see that the monkey is back with his big hammer!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:52 | 5751301 negative rates
negative rates's picture

When the dow the debt and the gdp all have to be the same, the end is near.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 17:40 | 5753325 bid the soldier...
bid the soldiers shoot's picture

you have hit the nail on its head.  it's an harmonic convergence.

Harmonic Convergence is a supernatural phenomenon that occurs once every ten thousand years...

It happened last in early Ur when the Mesopotamian Agricultural Average and the Sumerian national debt converged and the Great Bull market of he Bronze Age began.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751281 hotrod
hotrod's picture

It is a matter of National Security so they can report what they want.  We would not want to appear weak to our enemies.

How many did the BIRTH model add to January?   I think I see more cookie delivery stores.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:48 | 5751282 Monty Burns
Monty Burns's picture

Wait until the 'finalized' figure is quietly released later in the month.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751284 Confundido
Confundido's picture

And gold got the smackdown 3 minutes BEFORE the announcement, just in case the bugs began doubting who is still in charge here...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:50 | 5751292 maneco
maneco's picture

I'm not CONFUSED though. :)

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:27 | 5751508 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Awesome! I'm taking my daughter to the coin store this afternoon to buy her first full tube of ASEs.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751289 thepigman
thepigman's picture

It's just cover for the fed to declare victory and raise rates before the recession is apparent

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:49 | 5751291 FreeNewEnergy
FreeNewEnergy's picture

Everything is AWESOME!™

My boner is large!

Hookers and blow for everyone (except employees of Radio Shack, Guitar Center, McDonald's, Oil drillers, ummm...), well, maybe just hookers, then.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:58 | 5751331 RoyJones
RoyJones's picture

Crude is also up. Putin must also be getting a boner. Who knows with a real lot vodka maybe Merkel might get lucky tonight.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:54 | 5751305 p00k1e
p00k1e's picture
"Happy Days are Here Again!" (Ben Selvin and the Crooners, 1930)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqsT4xnKZPg

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:55 | 5751308 yogibear
yogibear's picture

As long as the dollar remains strong they won't raise rates. They'll just keep talking about it. 

It's what they have done so far and will continue to do.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:55 | 5751316 replaceme
replaceme's picture

my f*cking head just exploded.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:59 | 5751334 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

Lucky you then, you are now out of the matrix.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:56 | 5751319 venturen
venturen's picture

remember the USSR had full employment as it died

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:57 | 5751321 FreeNewEnergy
FreeNewEnergy's picture

Tiger Woods hired 65,000 swing coaches. Didn't quite work out for them, so, back to 180,000 next month.

BTW, isn't 5% considered full employment? Rates should have started going up three months ago, ya know, cuz the Fed is so smart and Yellen's dick is huge and all that.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:01 | 5751349 maneco
maneco's picture

When the markets were kind of free in the 1990s and early 2000s the 10yr yield would be around 6.5% and the Fed Funds target would be around 4.875%. What we have now is a farce.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:57 | 5751322 Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Here I am, throwing cold water all over this awesomeness.

http://www.bls.gov/news.release/empsit.t01.htm

Not-seasonally adjusted data from the Household Data is sick.

Unemployment rate - 6.1% (up from 5.4%)
Employment-population ratio - 58.7% (down from 59.1%
Employed - down over 560k m/o/m
Unemployed - up over one million m/o/m

Oh, well. I have to go now. Gotta buy me some Apple and Shake Shak stock.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 14:49 | 5752552 PTR
PTR's picture

Oh, well. I have to go now. Gotta buy me some Apple and Shake Shak stock.

 

For a quick second it looked like you typed "Shit Shak"

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:57 | 5751323 londoncalling
londoncalling's picture

going to be hard for p/e multiples to stay up here when the risk free rate is raised

uk is on 0.5% base rate for 70 months

my guess it we get a rise, a stock crash and a cut

but no more exceptional measures (qe etc) can be tolerated if a crash doesn't come first

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:58 | 5751326 SillyWabbits
SillyWabbits's picture

I think many are missing the point.

The laid-off workers have new jobs: filling out Unemployment Forms.

Looking for a new job is full time work.

Which is why the labor participation rate went up!

It all makes sense.

/sarc/

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751361 Monetas
Monetas's picture

My extended benefit unemployed Father-in-Law .... makes $70 per hour .... selling "Loosies" .... in front of Human Resources !

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 09:58 | 5751332 Monetas
Monetas's picture

"Payrolls are uuuuuup .... gas prices are doooooown !" .... Algore.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751344 Q-Q-Q
Q-Q-Q's picture

An accountant made a comment to me today...."now that the economy is improving". I asked him how many of his clients were doing better than last year and he said none, it's really really tough at the moment he added!!?! Just goes to show the bs mantra of the economy picking up is sinking in even though it's bs.

People are made to believe it's just them that's having a tough time.

What can you do when you are fighting fake numbers, I guess just wait until people join the dots.....because algo's won't.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:52 | 5751632 Farmer Joe in B...
Farmer Joe in Brooklyn's picture

I'm going to ask my accountant the same question... clever...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:00 | 5751345 hotrod
hotrod's picture

Low Oil is putting people back to work.  More campers, boats, SUVs, and loans.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:00 | 5751347 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

Wow, this is incredible!

I am going to leave work straight away and go buy some stawk in an undervalued company call Radio Shack, or was it Shake Shak? Whatever it's all good.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:02 | 5751358 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

How many of these jobs were created by the birth-death model of small businesses?

The same small businesses that Gallup shows more dying than being born for the first time in history over the past few years?

Something just isn't lining up.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751362 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Brought to you by Unicorn Data Services.

 

We outsource your data reporting and you can pay us in skittles!!!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:03 | 5751364 SofaPapa
SofaPapa's picture

Whopping!!!

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:06 | 5751375 Space Animatoltipap
Space Animatoltipap's picture

A new year and therefore new accounting "methods"? Why not, in an Animal Farm anything is possible in order to mislead the sheeple.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:08 | 5751385 wrs1
wrs1's picture

Gold is destroyed on BLS days, never own gold going into a BLS report unless you want to lose money.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:52 | 5751631 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

Andrew Maguire exposed that years ago.....of course the CFTC didn't want to hear it.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:11 | 5751403 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

Pow! 10yr yield just took off.
Table B-1 not seasonally adjusted... Over 2 million workers shed. No worries they will be back next christmas season.

Something to watch is labor force flows:
Employed to unemployed has been trending up since June.
http://research.stlouisfed.org/fred2/graph/?g=ZOz

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 13:06 | 5751404 Goozar
Goozar's picture

Something like the following story is happening to all of us now:

(And it's a true story from an Afghan friend!)

 

Not long ago in the Afghan province of Herat lived a man who inherited some patches of good land to feed his goats and grow some wheat. Compared to the rest of the Afghan society the man and his family were pretty wealthy and they owned a nice house also. The man and his family always cared for the community and they spend some money for school and medicine services.

This was all to the dislike of the local Taliban group, which was dwelling in some rusted shags in the mountains.

Before long it was decided that the man had to die. So the Taliban planted a mine before his house in the night, covered it with some tumbleweed grass and hoped the problem would solve itself quickly.

 A sunny and clear new morning came when the man left his house, but becoming suspicious of some strange tumbleweed grass before his doorsteps. Careful as he was, he inspected the heap of tumbleweed just too see that something was hidden underneath. So he called the local police and they found out it was truly a mine, planted to kill a man.The relief was great after the mine was dismantled and he felt he had escaped a real threat.

The next morning the bell was ringing at the man's house. When he opened he saw a tanned man with a beard and a Kalashnikov on his shoulder. "Are you Arash Abbas?", asked the bearded man. "So i am", replied the owner of the house.

"Well i am the local Taliban commander and we planted a mine before your house yesterday, which didn't go off and kill you. We had expenses for the mine and now its gone. We ask you to pay us for our expenses and our efforts"

 

The moral of this story and of the state of our current financial markets: If you dont belong to the chosen few, they want you dead. and they want you to pay for your own demise if their actions didn't lead to the desired success initially. Welcome to a Central Bank man's world!

 

 

 

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:19 | 5751467 brushhog
brushhog's picture

So, the point here is that unemployment rose while new job creation and salaries went up. ZH would benefit greatly by keeping their message clear and simple.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:22 | 5751485 SMC
SMC's picture

Lies often reveal more than the truth they attempt to obscure.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:29 | 5751514 Callz d Ballz
Callz d Ballz's picture

I call BS, we've had more snow so far this year...

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:31 | 5751524 Dre4dwolf
Dre4dwolf's picture

Meh I see cyclical shit

This year you will have a lot of:

1) People going to bars

2) People replacing their furnaces that are approaching 10 ~ 15 years old units

3) People patching roofs

4) People changing appliances

5) People being hired to deal with new confusing / fraudulent tax laws (thanks Obama)

 

All the hiring will be in places that cost the consumer money.... the rise in earnings will taper off.

And remember for every dollar someone earns, someone has to spend it in the first place, and during the transaction more often than not it is a taxed income, which means money leaves the hands of society and goes into corrupt hands of government.... where it is not productive.

Wait 2 ~ 3 months and you will start to see earnings decline IMO.

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:44 | 5751587 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

BLS being run by the Pentagon now.

We are in a currency war, and you are being lied to.

It means the end is closer than I thought.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:47 | 5751612 Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

I got a raise at my job this year (it still doesn't beat real inflation); methinks the corporations are playing a little catch up to make sure the plebs don't catch on too fast and get out of line.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:57 | 5751665 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

If you knew the truth, you would have all your money in gold and silver.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 10:54 | 5751644 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

China can continue buying US assets using US Treasuries as collateral.

I hope the Chinese understand that they are not dealing with honorable people.

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 11:06 | 5751714 JiminGA
JiminGA's picture

I'm always puzzled that we have about a million first time unemployment claims each month and "add" about 250K to 300K jobs each month....and that's good news.  Is this Common Core math?

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 12:39 | 5752078 Inbetween is pain
Inbetween is pain's picture

Whopping bad writing.  You used the word whopping three times in the first paragraph.  WTF is it with ZH and that word?  You guys connected to Burger King or something?  Don't know of any synonyms for something very large?  Here are some:

 

Fri, 02/06/2015 - 15:11 | 5752634 Youri Carma
Youri Carma's picture

This is a waste of time unless you are busy writing fairy tales. And then the good seasonal fairy waved her wand .... and everything was alright again. Now go to sleep children, tomorrow an other fairy tale story.

Sat, 02/07/2015 - 00:27 | 5754715 Steverino
Steverino's picture

the Household Survey needs to be trashed.. and a daily polling of 500 households needs to replace it...

 

 

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