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"Hedge Fund Olympics" Caption Contest

Tyler Durden's picture




 

We have no clue, nor do we want to know, what is going on in the following picture of Lynn Tilton.

Source

 

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Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:44 | 5942264 wallstreetapost...
wallstreetaposteriori's picture

I'm pretty sure that's a dude.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:46 | 5942268 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Tylers:  You sure you didn't mean "Hooker Olympics"?

And the "Senior Division" at that?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:48 | 5942287 idea_hamster
idea_hamster's picture

MY EEEYYYYEEESSSS!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:53 | 5942312 Manthong
Manthong's picture

And First Place in the “Denied Admittance Into The Mille-High Club” category goes to…  

 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:54 | 5942325 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

I should've never clicked on this article. What has been seen cannot be unseen.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:02 | 5942371 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

EyeBleach

DaddyO

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:06 | 5942405 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

that is a pic from the 2013 "most cum ever swallowed in 1 hour contest"...joey chestnut came in a distant 2nd....

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:12 | 5942434 pods
pods's picture

Okay, the 80's pics weren't that bad.  Yikes, this photo is the digital manifestation of "the turtle effect."

As for the caption contest:

 "what picture did Bruce Jenner take to his pre-opt appointment?"

pods

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:49 | 5942867 max2205
max2205's picture

Long botox 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 21:15 | 5944115 Fish Gone Bad
Fish Gone Bad's picture

Oh looooooook, she won the special olympics.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 23:44 | 5944468 nailgunnin4you
nailgunnin4you's picture

Has her obsession with plastic surgery prevented both sides of her mouth from smiling? Fuck you grace!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:14 | 5942436 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Steven Tyler's (Aerosmith front man) Transgender older brother wins bronze in The Special Olympics.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:34 | 5942542 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Exactly. Totally looks like Steven Tyler to me too.  If that's what she's advertising on the outside, the inside must be a complete mess.

 

 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:59 | 5942917 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Now thats Funny TIS !!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:14 | 5942441 General Decline
General Decline's picture

"...And this is what you'll look like if you stop mid-way through gender re-assignment surgery"

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:03 | 5942384 Eirik Magnus Larssen
Eirik Magnus Larssen's picture

America in a nutshell.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:46 | 5942563 Cruel Joke
Cruel Joke's picture

OK, I give up. What is it?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:58 | 5942640 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

What's the difference?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:45 | 5942271 Burt Gummer
Burt Gummer's picture

That's one scary lookin' bitch.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBCUCJNWimo

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:48 | 5942289 Creepy A. Cracker
Creepy A. Cracker's picture

An ugly dude...

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:00 | 5942352 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:02 | 5942374 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

Stay classy.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:36 | 5942546 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Rug don't match the curtains.  Both are prolly 100% grey anyway.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:50 | 5942879 max2205
max2205's picture

Zero shave

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:17 | 5942991 logicalman
logicalman's picture

A female friend of mine used to say 'when mixing up hair dye do a double batch so you can have a snatch to match'!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 16:59 | 5943415 mobtown
mobtown's picture

Obviously a New York girl, Flatbush.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:03 | 5942376 nevadan
nevadan's picture

She's a bush pilot?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 21:47 | 5944210 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

No, she's a bushman of the kalahari.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:04 | 5942389 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

Yikes!!!!

DaddyO

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:09 | 5942420 Doubleguns
Doubleguns's picture

William, your not helping things here. Its going to take something quite caustic to remove the images for sure. 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:22 | 5942485 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Detach your retinas. Then you qualify to be a German co-pilot...

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 22:27 | 5944316 nailgunnin4you
nailgunnin4you's picture

Detach your retinas. Then you qualify to be a German co-pilot...

 

Not soon enough!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:14 | 5942444 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

Raise shields!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:15 | 5942450 T-NUTZ
T-NUTZ's picture

ZERO WEDGE

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:22 | 5942481 thebigunit
thebigunit's picture

Too much information.

W-A-A-A-Y-Y-Y too much information.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:23 | 5942492 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

You gotta admit, it adds a hole new dimension to "Zero Hedge"

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:48 | 5942861 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

That hedge needs mowing though, would'nt you agree?

DaddyO

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:30 | 5942517 Nostradumbass
Nostradumbass's picture

Man is that ever a great image WB7!

Is it holding a cupie doll between its thighs?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:33 | 5942527 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

I am afraid to zoom in too close to check...but I am fairly certain they sell unhedged bush panties like that on Cramer's website.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:33 | 5942534 SweetDoug
SweetDoug's picture

'

'

'

Now where'd I put that ZeroHedgeTrimmer again?…

 

•J–<
V-V

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:35 | 5942543 Conax
Conax's picture

Aw hell naw!

hahahaha

Nice wolverine  ;P

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:41 | 5942570 Monty Burns
Monty Burns's picture

A missing appendage around the crotch area?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:20 | 5942999 Agent P
Agent P's picture

That hedge is definitely > zero

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 16:51 | 5943389 Boozer
Boozer's picture

Power muff from the early 80's.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:26 | 5942508 Nostradumbass
Nostradumbass's picture

Fabulous Shiksa?

Tue, 03/31/2015 - 00:47 | 5944559 blowing winter
blowing winter's picture

I'm making over $7k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life. This is what I do... www.globe-report.com

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:45 | 5942272 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Serious case of man hands going on there.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:51 | 5942310 NoVa
NoVa's picture

She's a man, baby!

No Nigel, I mean she's a man.

No he's not, she's my mother!

~  Austin Powers

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:47 | 5942280 replaceme
replaceme's picture

That badge has to say Honorable Mention at some sort of Special Ed stripper competiton. Good for her.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:54 | 5942326 813kml
813kml's picture

First runner-up at Miss Tranny Universe Pageant.

I bet The Donald was trying to tap that backstage.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:47 | 5942281 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

You'd think that woman, with all the money she's worth, would replace a worn out sweater now and then - you can see right through that ugly thing!  Same with the sweater! 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:50 | 5942295 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Irma la Douche

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:51 | 5942301 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

"Dude looks like a lady."

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:51 | 5942304 Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

Plastic Surgery Olympics; she got a gold medal in the "Botox Marathon" Event.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:56 | 5942306 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Sucked the most cock in any single day...?  scary shit.  All women try to maintain their revelance..  older, especially wealthy, women seem to be the most desparate in this regard sometimes... ..here's to all those dad's that were a "no show" in their daughter's lives eh...

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:04 | 5942392 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Hey Vagenius,

Just WTF does revelance & desparate mean? Define it.

 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:09 | 5942407 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

relevance...

basically a "look at me" attitude..

look at me, pay attention to me... It's the only reason that I have to explain some of the things the mothers of my kid's friends wear.

 

There is simply some shit that a mother of three, who let herself go, should not wear...

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:40 | 5942566 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

You either need to hone your reading/spelling skills or get a new eyeglass script. Or is it dyslexia?

Read your post Asshat.

I said define "revelance & desparate"

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:53 | 5942625 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

So your contribution or intellectual input today is focused on my spelliing error?

Troll.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 17:29 | 5943496 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

It would appear that you don't receive as well as you give.

Your posts reveal an unbridled anger at more than the financial chicanery as evidenced repeatedly.

Perhaps a comfort woman could help release some of that all too obvious negative tension.

So your helpful definition for non-existent words was really solicited?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:59 | 5942915 Condition 1SQ
Condition 1SQ's picture

Who gives a shit?  At least he had something meaningful to contribute beyond spellchecking.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 21:35 | 5944166 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

And that was what?

Sucking cocks?

Meaningful, no doubt.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 23:24 | 5944405 nailgunnin4you
nailgunnin4you's picture

And that was what?

Sucking cocks?

Meaningful, no doubt.

 

Ehh. You spellchecked someone on the internets. Go fuk yawself gai kunt

 

Oh and caption could be "Before plastic surgery this forehead necklace was just a necklace". 

 

She's only 55 too, no way her natural face at 55 looks worse than this. Great '88 pics though what a decade.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:51 | 5942308 Glass Seagull
Glass Seagull's picture

 

 

"Wall St. ... bitchez"

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:52 | 5942311 Itgoestoeleven
Itgoestoeleven's picture

?????????????????????????????????????

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:54 | 5942322 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

Chevy Chase has one hell of a makeup artist..

 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:55 | 5942327 Creepy Lurker
Creepy Lurker's picture

The only appropriate caption for this is - WTF?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:55 | 5942330 Smuckers
Smuckers's picture

For Sale: 1959 Olds - driven hard.  All parts replaced or upgraded, but years ago.  As is.  BO

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:13 | 5942442 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

Do you have clean title?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:11 | 5942694 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

Can't keep buffing out that paint job forever. Eventually you get down to primer.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 16:04 | 5943226 Ulfric Stormcloak
Ulfric Stormcloak's picture

Does it leak tranny fluid?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:57 | 5942339 DontFollowMyAdv...
DontFollowMyAdviceImaDummy's picture

FIND THE NIPPLE!!!

 

(i did and now i suddently have a hankering for an openfaced roasted beef sando)

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:57 | 5942340 Conax
Conax's picture

Man, I like that two pound watch. Wonder where he got it.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 12:58 | 5942342 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

"Women want to be her, men want to be with her."

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:07 | 5942350 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

"Lynn was thrilled to accept the award as the world's first transsexual fund manager."

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:00 | 5942351 Lokking4AnEdge
Lokking4AnEdge's picture

Jumping to conclusions in the senior olympics....

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:01 | 5942363 Falconsixone
Falconsixone's picture

What is it?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:03 | 5942382 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

A horse.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:05 | 5942400 Mike Honcho
Mike Honcho's picture

Lynn wasn't able to make the event, so her body double Stan did instead.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:12 | 5942430 prymythirdeye
prymythirdeye's picture

I could not put into words what I was looking at but after reading your comment, it perfectly expresses what I was thinking!  Too funny

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:07 | 5942408 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my arse........

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:02 | 5942924 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Hey ya Lunatic, you are confusing rabbits with Hamsters !!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:09 | 5942417 bentaxle
bentaxle's picture

Looks like your average insurance salesman.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:09 | 5942422 discopimp
discopimp's picture

Putting the MUG in MUGly!!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:25 | 5942503 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

Putting the Fug in Fugly!!--- fixed it for ya

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:17 | 5942456 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

 

 

Well I'm not the world's most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola

Well I left home just a week before
And I'd never ever kissed a woman before
But Lola smiled and took me by the hand
And said dear boy I'm gonna make you a man

Well I'm not the world's most masculine man
But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man
And so is Lola
La-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:19 | 5942461 q99x2
q99x2's picture

They had a program on Coasttocoastam about them last night.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:21 | 5942476 Charming Anarchist
Charming Anarchist's picture

Sagging old Bridget Bardot advertized in the side bar is looking better and better! 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:22 | 5942487 youngman
youngman's picture

a PLASTIC Surgon is thinking...big money ahead

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:32 | 5942530 SweetDoug
SweetDoug's picture

'

'

'

I know I'd give her some money, just not to invest…

 

•J•
V-V

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:39 | 5942561 CHX
CHX's picture

Lynn Wiltin' Tilton

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:48 | 5942601 Ward cleaver
Ward cleaver's picture

Seen better looking heads coming out of zippers

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 13:57 | 5942637 Toolshed
Toolshed's picture

My eyes!!!! My eyes!!!!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:17 | 5942719 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

Kafka had a sweater just like that.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:18 | 5942726 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

She may be a Clingon, but she's definitely not from the Virgo Cluster. 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:21 | 5942743 Chipped ham
Chipped ham's picture

Wherever she/he was, whatever she/he did, at least she/he won first prize!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:28 | 5942760 Biggieshort
Biggieshort's picture

I got some private video of her getting ready for the event.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-plPj9LGu8

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:29 | 5942765 Goldbugger
Goldbugger's picture

HEDGE-AMONICS

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:29 | 5942766 bloostar
bloostar's picture

And in other news, GDP prints at 3% higher as a result of worldwide replacement of cracked camera lenses and viewer spectacles.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:33 | 5942784 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

Honey, which goes better with this dress, my fake Rolex watch which I pledged as $25,000 collateral in the Zombie I fund, this matching rhinestone tiara, necklace and ring which I pledged as $15million collateral for the Zombie II fund, or this priceless Olympic gold medal in financial gymnastics which I awarded myself with a forged certificate?   

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:43 | 5942840 magnumpk
magnumpk's picture

Needed: one paper bag, the giant lawn/leaf variety.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:48 | 5942864 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

I THOUGHT ZIPPERHEADS WERE ORIENTAL

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 14:53 | 5942890 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

This pic of Lynn (nee Garfinkle) comes from her FB section Photos.

I spotted another one there, where she's posing with John Travolta. One of the commenters (Arlene Menachem) commented "Beauty & Brains". I guess Arlene would know...

Then there's a pic of her and her dad kissing, with her comment: "One of the few pictures of me and my dad. Remembering the strength of that love makes me smile in my heart." On the lips? Really??? Seems creepy.

Her father was Jerry Garfinkle, from the Bronx. According to Wiki, her father "was a tough New York City schoolteacher and a strong influence on her." Evidently.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:03 | 5942933 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Crcodile Dundee check needed, Isle 2 !!!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:04 | 5942934 deerhunter
deerhunter's picture

Beauty is only skin deep but ugly' stop the bone.
Beauty slowly fades away but ugly holds its own!

Or a bush in hand is worth two in the street?
I am a bit torn but yes to the eye bleach.

I have read we all begin as females in the womb? Not so sure!
Good day all!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:13 | 5942969 Mi Naem
Mi Naem's picture

You could still fix it - until somebody comments. 

oops

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:05 | 5942942 deerhunter
deerhunter's picture

Ugly's to the bone. Spell check monster ruined it !
All the spell check fairies are now going to have their way with me so down arrow away !

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:19 | 5942996 Zymurguy
Zymurguy's picture

Whut, no beavuh?

oh... thanks WilliamBanzai7, thanks!

I'd still hit it.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:26 | 5943031 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

She has the same birthday as I - (different year) - Earth Day.

I think not.

And it gets worse:

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.helihub.com/wordpress/wp-...

 

Holy shit, there are some SERIOUS issues here...

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 18:42 | 5943699 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

That's her outfit for beheading ISIS prisoners.

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 15:27 | 5943034 wwxx
wwxx's picture

 

caption contest: "When you got one of these...you can get one of those, anytime"

 

 

 

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 17:22 | 5943480 Clowns on Acid
Clowns on Acid's picture

Peak Trollop?

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 18:46 | 5943708 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

Look, Ma, it's a raccoon!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 18:51 | 5943719 mendolover
mendolover's picture

Who the hell dresses and takes photos like these?  Holy shit!

https://www.google.com/search?q=lynn+chilton&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&e...

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!