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Summing Up Every CNBC Segment Today In 1 Image
Where did AAPL's CNBC marketing spend go today? This guy has a pretty good idea.
Are we exagerating? Yes: it's really just half og all CNBC segments.
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Well after you see that, what can you really say........
uh, how about, "kill me now"?
If it floats, flies, or runs iOS...rent it.
He needs some Bitcoin flair!
He's holding one in his hand, don't you see it?
Dang, they come at only 10k a piece!
It's a safe bet that guy has never had the tiniest bit of sex.
That's not true... girls today are into geeky guys, fat and hairy guys like Seth Rogan, you gotta be hip to understand you dig?
or this guy...
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3033539/The-man-HALF-STONE-pen...
OK, I have a challenge for ZH readers (if you are bored) ... I have wanted a pocket watch for years, but never seem to follow through with the purchase as I get bogged down in the shopping process. I could spend several hundred, maybe more, for a good quality watch that will last a lifetime (with sensible service). I like neat features like multiple time zones or tides or crap like that, but it isn't essential.
Reccomendations?
Regards,
Cooter
I've owned an Alsta pocket watch since the late '70s. It's a simple but elegant design (it "only" tells time). Coupled with a nice double-link watch chain and it's very stylish.
Not sure if they make them anymore, but you can find them on eBay.
and I'm sure all 15 of their viewers were really diggin' it too
Cut to Joe Kernen......ohhhhhh sh!t!
I've owned a Cupillard-Rieme pocket watch (mechanical) since 1978. A "not so expensive, yet elegant" watch, and with biennial servicing it's lasted well.
I also used to have one of their electromechanical wrist watches. Again, very elegant, but much less reliable (with the usual "French Parts Issue" a la Citroen!). A case of "Nice Design, pity about the durability".
"Claire, you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitis of the nuts? It's pretty tasty."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UiR30ksh8Qw
So get up get, get get down
911 is a joke in yo town
Get up, get, get, get down
Late 911 wears the late crown
Although HE rocked the clock.
pods
That's probably a good thing for society's sake.
Why, is he married?
It is a safe bet that guy has never even spoken to a woman without having to give a credit card number first.
So are we supposed to be able to "click" those dots to activate apps?
What about those of us with the condition known as "hot dog fingers?"
Nvmnd, wouldn't actually wear one of those because I don't usually like the type of people attracted to them.
Like the guy with the dopey iWatch hat on. Coffeeshop Indie movie types.
pods
Built in plausible deniability for the "fat finger" trades.
Oh yeah! Fuck we!
Nothing says... "I'm a fucking dork ass dweeb"... more than buying an iWatch [with bitcoins]...
Well most Bitcoiners do not support Apple or buh their products. So doubt we have that problem.
Yeah ~ 'sucks' that it came down from +$1,000 before non paid capital gains taxes, [& dropping] huh?
Maybe u oughta consider selling a chunk of that silver [that you yourself bragged that you bought at $30], at a capital loss, & buy yourself an iWatch you help you flee the IRS...
It goes back up again. What we knoes of Satoshi (praise be upon him) is that his Bitcoins always go back ups. If you think a 75% correction scares fanatical, suicidal Bitcoiners away you should think harder and meditate upon Satoshi's first block.
So ~ You're a TRADER... [like the 'channelingstocks.com' dweeb]...
Buy LOW ~ Sell HIGH, right?
We actually like to get high first and then trade. Take lots of DXM and 2CB, head over to https://btc-e.com and trade away!
well NOW ~ FINALLY... You've gained my respect [+1]
I'm calling a PERSONAL 'ceasefire'...
I think it is advisable to wait until they release the iFingerRing before saying such things. We have a long ways to go before we see the cringeworthiest creation from crAAPL.
I want an iDildo for my girlfriend.....
...why don't you try to get a girlfriend first?
Jealous are we?
Just friendly ribbing ya.
let me try........Ponzi pumping prick MFers that don't contribute one single ueful/truthful point to their pathetic water carrying shill loaded show of pumptards.
Yer blocking yer true feelings, c'mon, let it all out...:>D
dazed and confused?
If you loved the GPS ancle bracelet the cops stuck on you, you will have orgasms over the iWatch?
water carriers for a product looking for a market (of idiots).
I'm making over $7k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life. This is what I do... www.globe-report.com
He does look really happy - does the gigantic apple watch radiate alpha waves or something?
I guess if i really want to be a bona fide douchebag, I need an i-watch.
So THAT'S what an ass hat looks like. I always wondered.
The "asshat" gave it away, huh?
you can't fix stupid, not even with duct tape
These are the idiots sipping brandy in the bar on the Promenade deck of the Titanic while im getting into the 1st lifeboat to be lowered 1/2 full of passengers...yes, it "might" be unsinkable...but I ain't trusting "might" with my ass....
Saving a spot in the boat for the hot chick floating on the headboard.....
they'll be the ones flipping over your life boat while trying to climb in from the side
Did I mention the multiple Gaff-hooks I brought?....
South Park should have fun with this one.
Right, a I Watch wearing Muslim executioner beheading a gay woman
Look! i am somebody in a group of nobodies
Yeah, its amazing how a small plastic box with silicon and lithium can propel the baboon to the front of the monkey pack.
And, look!
It even allows me to talk to other iDIOTS.
Hey! Who leaked the picture of the upcoming larger-screen Apple WatchPad?
Umm... someone still watches CNBC?
"watches" CNBC.
I see what you did there.....watches...iWatch very clever...LOLOLOLOLOL.
Just goes to show what kind of gutted out souless nation we have become when money and iGadgets have become the objects of worship.
I can hardly stand looking at screens anymore, let alone using entertainment 'apps'. It sucks the life out of your spirit and the spirit out of your life. Someday, I hope we will be free from the bondage of eternal screen-staring.
Do something physical today, ZH - something that would please the cosmos, like playing an instrument in D standard (god's favorite tuning).
FWIW, screen free week, May 4-10
http://www.screenfree.org/
My job and some portion of work (job != work) involve staring at a screen all day, i.e. it's kind of hard to be an electronics engineer and shun computers and screens. I don't take vacations. When I leave my engineering job and hit the road for travels, I'm going to make an effort to not come back to the tech industry.
Worked for me! (45 years ago, never looked back.)
I just got back from the bach, watching young babes, and I'm happy to say no one was wearing an Apple Watch or anything else but a bikiniand sun glasses.
Some things never go out of style...
"When everything is easy one quickly gets stupid."
-Maxim Gorky
It turns out morons do come with warning labels!
Is that ... Million Dollar Bonus...
Photo of the iBrain.
Send you paycheck to Apple and they give you trinkets with the Apple logo.
what about an apple cock ring that tells you if you are hard or not and then instnat messages designated contacts .
Already on the drawing board. Will be a big hit for Cook and his partners in the bath houses.
cock ring you say?
interesting
how quick will the live streaming updates be.
realtime or inbuilt delays.
delays mean missing the slot
iWatch just looks like an old 80's Timex.
Does anyone really know what time it is?
Battles have been fought over time since time began.
it amazin i tell all my friends
it amazin
so proud it got a chip designed in uk
amazin
uk amazin we got adele
der sas and transgenda
and mi6 keeping are kids safe from the perverts
and we got a chip design in der besteset watch ever
it keeps us safe cos we are tracked and can ync up with the id chip in your lungs and in yer skull
i can listen to my fave jewish singer bonio from u2
i neva trusted jobs much but the new gay guy he very liberoil
amazin
Another useless gadget that I will not be spending my money on. Oh, and I agree. Who watches CNBC anyway?
>Who watches CNBC anyway?
worth repeating ad nauseum...
and most of the rest of the "news" stories are just advertisements for other products, mostly of the financial kind
CNBC is primarily an advertising agency
By the way, in case you were wondering, someone anonymously registered the "appletattoo.com" domain several years ago
CNBC is primarily an advertising agency
It's why their viewing audiance has been dropping. And they wonder why their ratings are low?
Flavor Flav has now seen his digital opponent.
That right there is FULL RETARD if I've ever seen it. Hell, CNBC should stop reporting from the floor of the NYSE and start broadcasting from the iFloor of the Genius Bar.
Apple Dick Twat
Does CNBC still have that homely girl with the big cans on? Michelle.........something? She's butt ugly, stupid, but god damned nice cans on her
Calm down, this is just dispassionate reporting of financial news.
aapl price is a matter of natl security, given its weight in all the indices now. apple is two strikes away from trading at $50. they are not a tech company, but a consumer products company that sells tech-y gadgets.
given the price is $350 and only iphone owners can use the watch, i would venture to say the potential market is limited. why not a some kind of larger 'band' and ill just wear my iphone on my arm? or the ipad on my chest with a flip down mechanism?
aapl should be valued only on a declining margin basis on its phones (does anyone really 'buy' an iphone? all 3 of mine were free to extend my contract), add in cash per share and there you go. $45 is much more in line for a mature cash cow type of company.
if watch fails and then they have another miss....that'll be about it.
This is just getting too easy to point out that CNBC has zero credibility.
CNBC: The best news money can buy...
AppleTV customers even pay for their propaganda. Lol, what sheeples.
When did Apple buy CNBC news. Missed that story.......
Its called paid advertising and promotion.
I guess it's better than Cramer constantly talking about dirty McDonald's bathrooms.
It is only 1 out of 3 not a half....such exageration....
When will they come out with the 'Can i Watch'? porn sells...
He's a Replicant.
Kill him Decker.
I prefer 'can I watch'.
Chauncey, Chauncey Gardener, long time no see!
APPL circle jerk.
Brought to you by CNBC part of the Apple Group Of Companies.
Guys, let the masses enjoy their watch that can only tell time for three hours of the day, seriously.
If you had people lining to your house to buy all your useless crap you would be happy as hell. . . ^^
I prefer watching CNBC because they are really, really good at telling the news! They are also really honest and totally unbiased. The economy just gets betterer and betterer! The most important news of the day is of course "APPLE", cause they just reinvented the WATCH! Now everyone can be like Dick Tracey!
Now if I can only get a job, so I can afford to buy this futuristic timepiece.