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Obama Joins Twitter
Having fixed the US stock market's "profit and earnings ratios", the Middle East, and of course, the economy, Obama will now spend far more time where people's opinion of the president will be truly a two-way street: Twitter.
A casual reminder: any public threats against the US president will be promptly met with an appropriate response, usually transported by means of lethal drone.
Hello, Twitter! It's Barack. Really! Six years in, they're finally giving me my own account.
— President Obama (@POTUS) May 18, 2015
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Better never than late, you fucking asshole.
Hope he spends his time wisely.
doesn't he have anything better to do ? ? FFS
It's just a sign that it's time to dump all twatter stock.......
You didn't tweet that !
I just deleted my tweeter account.
Too bad. It's time to get my trool on.
Now how do you use this Twitter thingie?
Good job, Barry.
They needed more twats.
Does he get another affirmative action trophy now?
it's time to close my account
daily golf updates #manchurian
When this account gets hacked....
I'd bet a nickle he'll try to keep the account handle after he leaves office. He and his wookie will also likely loot the WH just like the Clintons
It's a trap!!!
where's Admiral Ackbar?
I see that Twitter has also verified the @POTUS account as well. This has to stand as the most involved background check Obama has ever been subjected to.
Twitter briefly banned the account after finding the White House on the State Department's list of Designated Foreign Terrorist Organizations persuant to Section 219 of the Immigrantion and Nationality Act. The State Department later admitted that the White House was, in fact, a domestic terrorist organization and as such, does not qualify for the Seciton 219 designation. Twitter reinstated Obama's account, but was unable to restore the three people that had previously 'Friended' the president.
What a fucking disgrace
we tweeted some folks
#gayteleprompterreaderinchief
Don't fool urself. Behind this Twiiter account are 60 of Cass Sunstein's peeples posting Hope and Change.
P.O.tuS.
"They're finally giving me my own account". One can only ask, who are "they"?
So that's what drudge meant when he posted" have a exit plan"
Relax, everyone needs an occasional break.
The destruction of a nation is never easy work.
He'll keep us apprised of his daring, single-handed raids against ISIS leaders, white haters and high cholesterol. Hell, maybe he'll even kill Bin Laden again.
If this keeps him from fucking up elsewhere it's good. He probably has his minions monitoring it.
Can you imagine if this went the way of #AskJPM?
Lol, that was fun wasn't it?
"...they're finally giving me my own account." A very frank admission of his lack of power
Yea, who's "they" Barrack?
They tell him what to do - They put him in the WH
His handlers #manchurian
That's Mr. fucking asshole to you.
Sooo, if "they're" finally giving you your own account, what does that say about how much control you really have?
:jeopardymusic:
My last pay check was $9500 working 12 hours a week online. My sisters friend has been averaging 15k for months now and she works about 20 hours a week. I can't believe how easy it was once I tried it out. This is what I do... www.jobs-review.com
How infantile...."Six years in, they're finally giving me my own account."
"They're finally letting me have my own bedroom""
"They're finally letting me sit at the adults table on Thanksgiving!"
"I finally learned what that thing between my legs is really for!"
"They're finally letting me swim without having to wait for an hour after eating!"
And by the way, who let you have a twitter feed? The bankers..the joint chiefs....the secret service....Michelle and the girls? I mean, really you are a grown man. Why do you need permission?
[Sent from my Apple Watch]
Peak narcissism.
New bellybutton piercing? How 'bout another selfie from a State funeral? What's his opinion on Bruce Jenner's sex change?
He was the last Luddite at the bathhouse.
Baffhouse?
don't drone me bro!
Because we don't get enough real-time lies in our lives.
Peak Efficiency
Oh yeah? Go fuck yourself, Obama.
I don't care.
Who gives a fuck.
When Greece goes down the shitter are people going to start looking at the Portugese and Spanish finances?
# Go Fuck Yourself.
As if it couldn't get more queer.
next stop, dick in the ass.
Another outlet to lie for cakeboy
What a putz... *person under the zionists
I wonder if all the hackers will be visited by the secret service.
I hadit!!! FUCK OBAMA AND FUCK THE SECRET SERVICE.
Dude is hilarious! Good thing those free Odumbo phones come with data packages, for emergencies of course.
Hello, Twitter! It's Barack.
I thought he was a giant preying mantis cartoon character? Praying? Don't drone me, Space Ghost!!!
+1 for the Brak
Don't Touch Me!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyUnSuYYs18
You're thinking of Zorack, not Brak!
You'd figure JamieDimon would have given him a heads up about his #askJPM and how it went.
sigh.
Except in @0@'s case any disparaging comments will result in a no expenses spared effort to fuck you up...
Yup, this account is pure troll-bait.
We need WB7 on this pronto!
Hey Obomba!
What else can you and your controllers do to destroy the country?
#accidentalfascist
#racebaiteragogo
#powerbottomrus
#choomgangridesagain
#740parkavenue
OMG...now we're O -fficially FUCKED!!
Moar distractions. We distracted some folks.
Excuse me while I go throw up.
Now he'll get to see how we REALLY feel about him.
shit, here comes the dumbo, lets go guys.
Who are "they"?
I'm amazed he finds the time between holes and fundraisers. What a guy.
That's a very disrespectful way to refer to the first lady. Appropriate, but disrespectful.
Wonder if that account will be handed over in 2017 to Hillary?
....make sure you sign the new "secret" tade agreement, after all GATT and NAFTA worked out so well for the middle class.
#gofuckurself
The Marxist con man joins Twitter. How appropriate. Maybe he can follow Isis.
oopsie
Hello, Twitter! It's Barack. Really! Six years in, they're finally giving me my own account.
they? who?
"They" should be executed at once!!!
Valarie and Michelle.
I think they control one testicle each.
I have no more fucks to give.
in a weak moment i empathize with all the potus' past and present but especially in the modern era(post ww2). it still must a shock to ascend to the office and then realize you really don't have any power for real. i always thought raygun epitomized the capture of the usa with his bedtime for bonzo administration only ronny was the monkey.
who the fuck is "they"? Goldman?
Nero fiddled while Rome burned.
Cue the Adolf clip with him foaming at the mouth about not getting his own account...
http://hipsterhitler.com/
Blocked.
He didn't really say what I've read, did he?
Did he?
Also, he's on Twitter now? That's so 3 years ago - what's next, he going on MySpace?
how many fake follower's did they buy him?
So, he starts off by putting himself on a first-name basis with the twitterati. Popcorn incoming.
Twitter for a twit!
#AskPOTUS
#isurwifeabigfoot?
See: Eddie Murphy's "Raw" - goonie goo hoo
Eddie Murphy called....it's Goony GOO GOO - motherfucker! <He said that>
Dasss rayciss!
"And I finally figured out about your wife, where you met your wife. You didn't meet your motherfucker wife on no camping trip! Your wife is a Bigfoot, isn't she, Barry? Your wife is a Bigfoot, isn't she, that's why the bitch's mustache is so motherfucker thick! 'Cos you shaved the bitch down and taught it to speak !"
Is Warren Buffet a boxers or briefs man?
....watched monsters vs. Aliens this weekend.
Villian named galaksar? Is damned near identical to o.
Hope williambanzai7 can "expand" on it.....
Obamas twitter hacked over/under 1 month?
So Obama, just 1.5 to go, and then you can hope and change that Chicago bitch too.
We really enjoyed ours the last 6 years, like hammered, warmed over dogshit
#fuckoffbarry
#eatshitanddiebarry
"They"? If the President of the United States can't even open up a twitter account without getting permission from "they"... what does that say about our freedom as a country?
If there is any Fed I have sympathy for, it's the SSA.
They literally have first row seats to a horror movie.
Hope the pension is worth it at the end of your careers.
Bet ya he's out by the end of the day.
Hello, Twitter! It's Barack. Really! Six years in, they're finally giving me my own account.
What a relief to know that a no account President isn't in charge of things.
"no account President" ROFL! You've won the internet today.
When does his Slush Fund start? Oh sorry "Charity"?
So who is going to control @POTUS come January 2017?
What better place for a twit to be a twat
#fuckerO
#Fuckbammythatsme
#CuntInChief
#PuppetMonkeyEmptySuit
just some of the handle suggestions I submitted to the cocksucker........
#fasttrackporchmonkeytolimitcongressionalpowers.
Average IQ of Twatter Dip's just plunged 3 points.
My life is complete now knowing this. This is our tax dollars hard at work.
Obama is a attention whore. He just hired a aid to press scripted dialog on a free twatter membership account. Obama makes it sound like he escaped the plantation.
. . . attention deficit whore, indeed.
#sockpuppet
Rumor has it that he plans to use Twitter to sign bills and Executive Orders, reserving the Rose Garden for North Korean style personnel 'decisions.'
We are all enthralled. Really!
How much did Twitter donate to the Obama Library fund in exchange for this PR?
Twats use Twitter.
Watch Twitter be used whenever Obama wants to distract from his destruction of America. A willing press will jump all over them to provide blocking.
Tweet: Sure did enjoy LeBron's performance last night.
Translation: Iran just finished mounting its first nuke onto a missile.
Twittering the wrong thing (against PROTUS) in US could be a Federal Offence :-)
Dammit Tyler! Can't you see I'm eating lunch?
How big is your wife's dick, Mr. Potus?
Hormone shriveled along with the tesickles.....100% pre-op, but Obama insisted Michael keep it until after his second term.....sometimes he wants something to play with when Ben Finkenbinder is not around.
Hormone shriveled along with the testickles.....100% pre-op, but Obama insisted Michael keep it until after his second term.....sometimes he wants something to play with when Ben Finkenbinder is not around.
They?
I'm sorry, who is they?
Them that gave him his Crackberry
Post a picture of your pakistani visa dumbass....
Dear Barack,
You might want to talk to Uncle Ben about Twitter before you go all "What's Up My Peeps,Tell Me What You Think"
False Rumor of Explosion at White House Causes Stocks to Briefly Plunge; AP Confirms Its Twitter Feed Was Hacked
http://www.cnbc.com/id/100646197
Now we have this Kenyan fuck engaged in fraud. He will declare an aid did it.
Google will be dragged down in creating false death accusations.
Obama, continuing lies leaves you a incompetent President of the United States of America. Your done. So is the Democratic Socialists Party.
Democratic Partyhttp://www.ohiohistorycentral.org/w/Democratic_Party?rec=880
Hey Barack!
Fuck Off!
Yo Barrack home depot having a sale on nail guns!
Hurry sale ends tonight!
Who the fuck is he referring to when he says "They"? He knows he's a puppet.
first lady was followed second PUHAAAAAAAAAAA============~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
#sixyearsinnobodycares
The CIA are cornering the Poppy Market; sorry wrong thread.
If the government gave you a twitte account barry they can just as well take it back.
HA!
Hi Bitchez, it's TalkToLind. It's been 8 years since Twitter launched and I still don't have an account. Fuck Twitter! And Facebook too.
# BLACK LIES MATTER
SHOUT OUT TO REGGIE LOVE AND BEN FINKENBINDER....
B====D + (__0__) = "GOLF OUTING"
Is this what you guys (and guyettes) call 'golfing full retard'?
~ DC