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Former European Council President Van Rompuy Appointed As Japan Haiku Ambassador

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Remember Gollum, pardon Herman van Rompuy, the former president of the European Commission with a penchant for lugubrious drollery on both Twitter and in real life?

 

After disappearing from the public scene last November when his term in EC expired, the Belgian politician has re-emerged, or rather, reincarnated into his new role. And while it is not hardly as dramatic as the emergence of a Hermina van Rompuy, his new role will surely raise several (knowing) eyebrows.

Meet: Japan's new Haiku Ambassador. From the Japan Times:

The Foreign Ministry said Tuesday it has named former European Council President Herman Van Rompuy as ambassador for enhancing relations between Japan and the European Union through haiku.

 

Van Rompuy visited Prime Minister Shinzo Abe at his office the same day.

 

The Belgian politician said he will do more to further develop Japan-EU relations as a haiku poet and a Japanophile. Abe asked for his support for bettering bilateral ties.

Who says politicians don't have real world skills. The question now: what will DieselBOOM's job be once the (latest( artificial European monetary union is finally torn apart.

 

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Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:41 | 6162309 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

WTF? More and more onionesque articles, becoming harder to tell if this is news or Farcews.

Which ZH?

Weird world, getting weirder.

Meanwhile, fresh upload, Reggae Flute? Uh--huh!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaZcFjEOr2s

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:55 | 6162346 max2205
max2205's picture

Haiku!  

 

Bless you 

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:01 | 6162359 jaap
jaap's picture

They should have done that 15 years ago as a full time job.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:45 | 6162317 Joe A
Joe A's picture

Van Rompuy was the architect of the bailout of the German and French banks....ahem.....Greece.

Dijsselbloem will either get a nice cushy job at the EU somewhere; go back to his labour party in NL that will be wiped out next time there is an election there; or will get a nice cushy position at some board of directors at some semi-public institution so he can F that up.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:47 | 6162319 Kina
Kina's picture

This   Hermina van Rompuy looks like some character from a Grimms fairytale.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:50 | 6162325 JamesH
JamesH's picture

Hermina should get a refund and a free redo. The first go at the plastic surgery sucks.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:53 | 6162329 Tinky
Tinky's picture

 

 

I wish him the best

in his important new role

nah, fuck him sideways

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:58 | 6162347 spdrdr
spdrdr's picture

 

 

 

Tinky, that was quick!

I am shamed by your slick post

Hare and the Tortise!

 

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:31 | 6162411 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

 

 

Never could Haiku

Takes too much effort to think

Have a beer instead

Fri, 06/05/2015 - 02:39 | 6165762 HolyfieldsOtherEar
HolyfieldsOtherEar's picture

The mid-June plum rain

Moistens the bank clerk's jockey shorts

Charisma of a damp rag

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:54 | 6162335 spdrdr
spdrdr's picture

Herman Von Rompuy

The Ambassador Gollum

The whole world is fucked...

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:54 | 6162339 CaptainObvious
CaptainObvious's picture

Well, since van Rompuy is the "Ambassador of Haiku" (I wasn't even aware of the existence of such a post) we should put forth our best haiku efforts to honor that.

Ahem.

Global governance

Looks like Gollum found a mate

Let's enslave the Greeks

 

Your turn!

Fri, 06/05/2015 - 02:48 | 6165768 HolyfieldsOtherEar
HolyfieldsOtherEar's picture

From the first rains of spring

Bloom delicate cherry blossoms

Greek repayments fund rent-boy bunga bunga parties.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:54 | 6162341 Lea
Lea's picture

They sure recycle clowns.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 07:59 | 6162350 yogibear
yogibear's picture

LOL, twins.

As the huge bubbles become more unstable there is greater volatility. 

All this central bank printed money has bubblized all assets.

The bubbles need some pins.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:34 | 6162425 Farmer Joe in B...
Farmer Joe in Brooklyn's picture

Apparently, there is even a bubble in international politics...

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:00 | 6162353 ptoemmes
ptoemmes's picture

Precious golden ring

Corrupts our mind with evil

Never lets us go

 

Gollum's Haiku by Jennifer Elluin, Aug 28, 2011

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:00 | 6162354 cn13
cn13's picture

We keep rewarding those who have failed with new positions of leadership.

What a crazy world we live in.

The crooks are in charge from the President of the U.S. all the way down to the most lowly regulator.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:32 | 6162417 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

I would not call that post a new position of leadership, though

Compared to the "Revolving Doors" principle or the "Pass over as Highly Paid Consultant of Lobbyists" or even only "Highly Paid Public Speaker"...

... it even smacks of a moderate, reasonable compost heap for Old Gollum for his services as glorified secretary to the EU Council

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:42 | 6162619 smacker
smacker's picture

The garden gnome was never a match for Barreloso.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 11:42 | 6163063 SmedleyButlersGhost
SmedleyButlersGhost's picture

It' s the new Mandarins. They are never without some kind of cushy public job as long as they don't rat anyone out or get caught too obviously as a perv/pedo.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:02 | 6162360 suteibu
suteibu's picture

Proof that Abe is sick again.  The last time he got sick as PM, he lost control of his bowels.  This time, to the great misfortune of the Japanese people, he has lost control of his mental capacities.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:06 | 6162371 CaptainObvious
CaptainObvious's picture

It can only benefit the Japanese if Abe has lost control of his mental capacities.  Perhaps then he will stop attempting to prop up the false front that is the Japanese economy and let it crash like it should have long ago.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:08 | 6162375 Sanity Bear
Sanity Bear's picture

fuck you Hermann Van

fuck the Rompuy family

fuck your whole life bitch

Fri, 06/05/2015 - 02:55 | 6165775 HolyfieldsOtherEar
HolyfieldsOtherEar's picture

Hermann van Rumpuy

Can lick my rump. Oy!

Lick my rusty sheriff's badge clean, you bat-eared, goblin-faced punk!

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:33 | 6162420 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Governing reduced
down to counting syllables
how appropiate

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 11:52 | 6163095 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Guess it is time, to
Rehypothecate any
Words infinitely

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:34 | 6162427 basho
basho's picture

he and blair should get together both are useless f*cks.

 

 

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 08:36 | 6162431 CarpetShag
CarpetShag's picture

A flying phuq yes
Gollum took one hard in ass
Useless twat Nippon

------
note the strict adherence to the 5-7-5 syllable meter.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:04 | 6162479 silverer
silverer's picture

When does he fall in to the boiling lava?

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:35 | 6162574 Professor Fate
Professor Fate's picture

Someone be sure to send this to Nigel Farage.

Fate the Magnificent
"Push the Button, Max" 

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:39 | 6162598 smacker
smacker's picture

I've always said Rompuy looks like a garden gnome, so this job is right up his street given Japan's liking for garden ornaments.

Hopefully this'll keep him out of Europe for a while. Pity the Japanese.

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:49 | 6162659 mantrid
mantrid's picture

> The question now: what will DieselBOOM's job be once the (latest( artificial European monetary union is finally torn apart.

 

Tragicomedy Ambassador to Greece enhancing it's relations with UE leftovers through drama

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 09:53 | 6162677 Kilgore Trout
Kilgore Trout's picture

Ghastly sight on air

Liesman fellates Bernanke

Swallows at finish

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 10:16 | 6162795 koreangold
koreangold's picture

Seems an awful lot of trouble to go to to hide being an asian sex tourist. 

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 14:39 | 6163791 VyseLegendaire
VyseLegendaire's picture

You took the words right out of my mouth, man.

::teary eyed::

;>)

Fri, 06/05/2015 - 02:58 | 6165777 HolyfieldsOtherEar
HolyfieldsOtherEar's picture

Future Asahi Shimbun headline:

"House elf Dobby spotted in Akihabara buying soiled panties from schoolgirls"

Thu, 06/04/2015 - 10:29 | 6162851 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Konnichiwa Motherfuckers!  

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