This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

"All Clear" Issued After White House Briefing Room Evacuated Following Bomb Threat

Tyler Durden's picture




 

All Clear apparently...

  • *WHITE HOUSE BRIEFING ROOM WAS EVACUATED ON BOMB THREAT: EARNEST
  •  *WHITE HOUSE GIVES ALL CLEAR ON BRIEFING ROOM
  • *SECRET SERVICE QUICKLY MADE SURE ROOM WAS SAFE, EARNEST SAYS
  • *BOMB THREAT WAS PHONED IN, EARNEST SAYS

* * *

 

* * *

 

 

 

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:14 | 6179473 Sonic the porcupine
Sonic the porcupine's picture

Tee time.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:15 | 6179482 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

They found out someone was going to ask a non-scripted question.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179509 jaap
jaap's picture

What was the topic?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:26 | 6179540 onewayticket2
onewayticket2's picture

the Truth must have been spoken.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:30 | 6179572 max2205
max2205's picture

Who cut the cheese?!

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:38 | 6179605 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Budd Dwyer-type incident.  Hopefully.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:42 | 6179629 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

OR... They wanted to end the last press conference dramatically because it's the last one that will ever be held before Obama declares himself King and cancels all future elections.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:54 | 6179690 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

King? I thought he was going for American Pharoah?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:58 | 6179711 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

no, he just wants to suck american pharoah off.   the reason for the evacuation is somebody forgot the astroglide

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:58 | 6179714 pods
pods's picture

All clear?  Whew.

Didn't even budge the needle on my giveafuckometer.

pods

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:00 | 6179720 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

It budged mine a little bit. I was concerned there wouldn't be a bomb..... and I was right.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:16 | 6179784 pods
pods's picture

Must be that the anti-terrorist software is not good at discerning jive?

"Dat briefing room is da bomb!"

Write another check to Booz Allen Hamilton, that outta fix it.

pods

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:46 | 6179912 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

you know what a shame is.   a bussload of politicians going off a 1000 ft cliff with an empty seat.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:36 | 6179608 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

Secret Service agent caught a kid flying a model plane nearby...

 

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:55 | 6179697 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Or worse..... selling lemonade.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:22 | 6179804 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

couda been one of those amish terrorist threatening to sell some of that terrorist milk.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:38 | 6179614 inhibi
inhibi's picture

My thought exactly.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:26 | 6179541 madcows
madcows's picture

moochelle''s lunch program.  hard hitting stuff.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:26 | 6179544 Bunghole
Bunghole's picture

Amerika

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:32 | 6179582 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

Why is everything a lie?

All it took.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:40 | 6179579 Paveway IV
Paveway IV's picture

"...They found out someone was going to ask a non-scripted question..."

That actually does happen on occasion, usually followed by a quick finger amputation or knee-capping to warn other lone-wolf stenographers.

The thing that would instantly make the White House go full-retard is if someone was going to give a non-scripted answer.

Has anyone asked why the Royal Saudi Air Force carried out missions near Baghdad supporting trapped ISIS fighters the other day? Or maybe why Assad captured dozen or so Saudi and Qatari officers in Syria? Someone is eventually going to ask why Saudi Arabia hasn't formally declared war on "...all those that oppose our Wahhabi head-choppin' caliphate and ISIS martyrs..." Saudi Arabia and ISIS are our frenemies - how the hell could we respond to that?

It would be pretty shocking to see the Secret Service rush in and put a bullet in Dee Dee Meyers' head for spilling the beans. You just know she's about ready to crack - look at her eyes! It's a lot less messy to just have a fake bomb threat, tranquilize her and sent to 'the farm' for a little electroshock and R&R.

Dee Dee - you were suppose to be on OUR side... what happened?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:02 | 6179719 junction
junction's picture

Meanwhile, spokesperson/liar Josh Earnest refused to answer the first reporter's question when they returned to their seats: "Who covered up the news organization cameras?" The reporter said the cameras are privately owned and someone ordered the cameras covered.  Earnest did not answer the question, claiming he had also been asked to leave the press briefing room.  No other area of the White House was evacuated.  The real question could be: What did someone leave in the White House press room that would cause Obozo to stage a false flag bomb scare to evacuate the press room?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:15 | 6179779 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

I'm thinking that since they covered the cameras, someone in security realized that something damaging was in plain view during the conference.  Most likely some embarrassing object and not a lethal one.  Let the guessing begin.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:54 | 6179944 Paveway IV
Paveway IV's picture

"...Most likely some embarrassing object and not a lethal one..."

I'm telling ya' - it's Dee Dee Meyers. I think they killed her and replaced her with a clone.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:17 | 6179490 ZippyBananaPants
ZippyBananaPants's picture

Someone ordered the extra large bbq bean side dish at Willie's yesterday!

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:31 | 6179576 NeedtoSecede
NeedtoSecede's picture

Silent but violent Bitchez!  Can't wait to read this thread in a couple hours after all the ZHers have a chance to comment...

 

False flag in the WH Press Room?  I hope none of the bomb dogs get hurt, but if that room blew up, I don't think it would ruin my day

 

 

 

 

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:25 | 6179536 44MagnumPrepper
44MagnumPrepper's picture

ALL HAIL CHUMBA

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:30 | 6179567 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

..... the fudgepacker cut the cheese....

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:14 | 6179477 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Obama and Reggie needed some quiet time together.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:14 | 6179479 Hobbleknee
Hobbleknee's picture

Who farted?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:19 | 6179502 B2u
B2u's picture

Michelle?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:35 | 6179592 Since Lehman
Since Lehman's picture

It was that one that Larry Summers (in foto) stained his underpants with a few years back (that still lingers to this day). Smelliest fart Since Lehman

http://www.bagnewsnotes.com/files/.a/6a00d8341cc90353ef01116852cd50970c-...

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:15 | 6179481 Glass Seagull
Glass Seagull's picture

 

 

Because someone was planning on asking more questions about the Clinton Foundation and its role in facilitating arms deals in Libya prior to Bengazi.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:19 | 6179499 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Lol......... The "press" asking real questions. I nominate your post for funniest comment of the day.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179508 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

bada bing

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:16 | 6179485 EdSav
EdSav's picture

Durrrrr, Bullash

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:18 | 6179495 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

off topic, but that must have been one hellacious bicycle wreck john kerry was in.  haven't seen old horseface since it happened.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179511 Realname
Realname's picture

Hes been moved to an Elmers manufacturing facility and is being watched closely.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:58 | 6179712 Realname
Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:22 | 6179522 EdSav
EdSav's picture

So bad, that crutches were out of the question.. Like a child who exagerates illness to skip school or something.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:30 | 6179564 Government need...
Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

Must have had an encounter with the same threadmill that got Harry Reid.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:31 | 6179574 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

And no one misses him, but he'll have to play a lot of ketchup when he returns to his office.

/rimshot

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:12 | 6179767 Depression is Coming
Depression is Coming's picture

I thought I saw him this past weekend at the bellmont. Wasn't John "Materiality" Kerry sniffing some good horse ass while bringing up the rear?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179503 The Fonz...befo...
The Fonz...before shark jump's picture

Reggie is walking around WH in nothing but a thong and flip flops so they need to evacuate press to prevent any leaks

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179507 lehmen_sisters
lehmen_sisters's picture

If that place was evacuated 24/7 , 365 , i wouldn't feel so bad paying taxes...I would, but atleast nothing would get signed. We can dream.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179513 Ajax_USB_Port_R...
Ajax_USB_Port_Repair_Service_'s picture

Malfunctioning teleprompter(s).

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:20 | 6179515 madcows
madcows's picture

sorry.  it was me.  i had to oversized burrito with all the fixings.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:21 | 6179519 tuttisaluti
tuttisaluti's picture

Michelle saw a cockroach 

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:25 | 6179533 Athemos
Athemos's picture

She looked in the mirror?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:00 | 6179722 Realname
Realname's picture

Then she hurriedly scurried back under the fridge.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:26 | 6179539 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Suspicious package- they found an actual journalist

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:27 | 6179552 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

Obama farted and it smelled like Reggie Love jizz.  It got akward.  People left.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:27 | 6179553 Evil Bugeyes
Evil Bugeyes's picture

Note to Obama: never eat beans before a press conference.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:28 | 6179555 Kreditanstalt
Kreditanstalt's picture

Failed bond auction!  Paychecks bounced

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:28 | 6179556 Joebloinvestor
Joebloinvestor's picture

Someone got caught trying to sneak in the truth.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:29 | 6179559 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Nah, he brought back some limburger & cut it.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:29 | 6179560 Government need...
Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

Critically high levels of flatulence.  Lot of oraltory going on.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:30 | 6179568 Arthur Schopenhauer
Arthur Schopenhauer's picture

There was no evacuation. The dude walked in and said "All of ya's get the fuck outta here".

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:33 | 6179587 dlfield
dlfield's picture

Joe Biden's farts are classified.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:33 | 6179593 Hubbs
Hubbs's picture

Hidden mics discovered. Those wascal Russians!

 

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:35 | 6179604 Goldbugger
Goldbugger's picture
BOMB threat!
Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:37 | 6179609 BeaverCream
BeaverCream's picture

Is the 21st century bolshevik purge beginning?  "Yes everyone, line up right here...okay now look straight ahead".

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:41 | 6179626 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Another naked man with a knife or a drone delivering mail.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:43 | 6179628 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Helps keep the masses in fear when the "leadership" appears fearful too.  Helps uphold the lie.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:42 | 6179632 Shaznardickleze...
Shaznardickleze the Doon's picture

Blame it on the rain, blame it on the snow, blame it on the bombs, blame it on the white man, blame it on Bush, blame it on Millennials, blame it on everything but the real problem. Central Banking, a bankrupt government run by crooks and theives, and Keynesian economics that require war for a measly key bump and a hookers ass to slap.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:50 | 6179668 Mike Masr
Mike Masr's picture

The teleprompter went down with the lies, oops I mean official narrative. Let's evacuate can't let any of the true narrative out. 

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:52 | 6179676 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

All clear given, so now stawks can rise

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:54 | 6179692 Nanur
Nanur's picture

That Joe Biden is quite a jokester!

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:56 | 6179701 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

A working class terrorist was on the grounds so they say...

he’s on his way to guantanamo so they’re all safe now but it was a close call...

It became clear he wasn’t a state official when lobbyists surrounded him and tried to hand him bags of cash money and he wouldn’t take it.

needless to say... alarms went off, panick set in, Obama is now late for his 12 hour a day gold game and there was a teleprompter that promted without being read...

In fact...

you could compaire Obama with Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy as his life was on the balance there...

just like them... but because he’s a better president than all of them put together, he survived the ordeal...

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 14:59 | 6179717 stant
stant's picture

Somebody needs to blow up a golf course that will get the purse opened up good , they will have hooter girls for tsa workers and Reggie for obo

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:00 | 6179721 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Thank god they haven't had to evacuate the poofster room where Reggie resides and Obie spends the nights

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:02 | 6179728 Lookout Mountain
Lookout Mountain's picture

Just another attempt to make the world look dangerous, our rulers threatened, and push for moar war.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:08 | 6179754 Bill of Rights
Bill of Rights's picture

Ha ha ha just as I said in the Russian oil for Yuan terrorist threat in 5,4 ,3..... The lunatics are so predictable lol

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:23 | 6179807 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Next a guy named Vizzini is going to kidnap a princess from the WH and blame it on Guilder.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:24 | 6179813 LouRukeyser
LouRukeyser's picture

How the fuck do you even "phone in" a bomb threat anymore?  Does the White House briefing room have a direct line?  1-800-BUL-SHIT?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:28 | 6179836 Infinite QE
Infinite QE's picture

No, Michelle was running around the WH screaming, "I'm coming out, I'm coming out! Bruce Jenner did it, so can I."

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:32 | 6179856 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

The problem really is that they should not have to evacuate ANY room in the White House to check for bombs. The front end security should screen and prevent even the most remote chance of a bomb getting in. Of course, the issue with that might be that there are too many "down home" folks with privileged access that don't want to be bothered with security checks and TSA-like groping.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:35 | 6179866 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

Was it really a bomb threat, or was it a reporter asking a tough question (for a change) that the White House didn't want to answer?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:41 | 6179890 wcvarones
wcvarones's picture

"WH staff not visibly evacuated."

Image

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 18:13 | 6180461 Lostinfortwalton
Lostinfortwalton's picture

Were they invisibly evacuated?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 15:53 | 6179939 CaptainMoonlight
CaptainMoonlight's picture

Am I the only guy that would love to see Obama blow up in a big ball of sh1tt and flame during one of his doublespeak sessions?

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 16:09 | 6180000 roadhazard
roadhazard's picture

Some terrorist was about to ask a hard ball question.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 16:10 | 6180006 CHC
CHC's picture

Interesting ploy to get all the press proudly displayed in front of the WH for a nice drive-by...

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 16:44 | 6180119 Raul44
Raul44's picture

This scam together with that recent airport scam should justify NSA for the stupid.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 18:12 | 6180455 Lostinfortwalton
Lostinfortwalton's picture

"Gentlemen, you cant fight in here. This is the War Room." Dr. Strangelove movie.

Tue, 06/09/2015 - 21:17 | 6181038 mendolover
mendolover's picture

Any updates on John Kerry's gunshot wound?

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!