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Stocks Soar In Biggest Opening Ramp Since 2011 As Austria Says Greek "Game Is Finished"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Presented with little comment side to note that the ramp on restructuring rumors has not diminished as the denials pile up. The US cash session open was the strongest since late 2011 as the headline hockey continues...

 

 

All your stops are belong to us...

To summarize, here are today's catalysts:

  • market up on Greece but Greece is flat
  • market up on Europe but Europe is down
  • market up on Japan but Japan tanked
  • market up on China but China dumped
  • market up on lower interest rates but rates are higher
  • market up on ORCL earnings but ORCL is getting slammed
 

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Thu, 06/18/2015 - 09:57 | 6209227 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

The death of Greece is celebrated the same way as a cop killing his ex-wife. 

This is some bullshit http://gawker.com/new-jersey-cop-allegedly-murdered-his-ex-wife-in-front-1712026494

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:07 | 6209272 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

So the Austrians say "Greece is Finished" (e.g., prepare for a bankruptcy 5x the size of Lehman) and the market goes up?  

Humanity deserves what is coming.  

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:09 | 6209283 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Oh goody!

Now we can move on to the Spanish, Italian  and Portuguese games next!

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:26 | 6209328 SERReal1
SERReal1's picture

Don't forget about the Irish...

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:31 | 6209345 ShorTed
ShorTed's picture

Nah, Wilbur Ross and Fidelity got them covered...nothing to see here.

/s

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 11:07 | 6209507 KnuckleDragger-X
KnuckleDragger-X's picture

No problems, the EU is merely advancing in another direction.....

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 11:05 | 6209485 HungryPorkChop
HungryPorkChop's picture

Just as predicted.  Most markets initially react positive since they're controlled and will be spun they got rid of a rotten tomato.  

Also, I would wager there's a lot of people out there holding funds that don't realize they are linked into the Greece debt problem and will take a haircut. Wait and watch as I bet the Greece tentacles will be far reaching.  Can you say big words like Complicated Financial Instruments, Credit Default Swaps and MF Global? 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:15 | 6209297 fxpmtrader
fxpmtrader's picture

humanity?

market?

Or the usual quarter end game "let's fuck the dumb sheeple back and forth".

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:21 | 6209309 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

I am starting to want to fuck the dumb sheeple back and forth as well too.  

I have so many people look at me like I am certified batshit insane when I tell them we are living in a financal bubble.  They then ridicule the thought, and assert the gravy train will go on forever. 

Watching everyone's life savings burn will be horribly entertaining.  I'll call in sick and watch it on Zerohedge and Facebook the whole day. 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:26 | 6209323 Gazooks
Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:29 | 6209339 Realname
Realname's picture

"In times of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act." I try to not even discuss anything with stupid people, any longer. Whats the point? Let them live in their own bubble...of illusion.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:35 | 6209358 indygo55
indygo55's picture

"I have so many people look at me like I am certified batshit insane"

I stopped talking about this about six months ago. Nealry everyone I know is totally blind to these issues. Cog Dis or what ever. I don't care anymore what happens anymore. I will tell them what happened afterwards. That day is pretty colse I think.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:54 | 6209431 Sages wife
Sages wife's picture

That's exactly why I'm so grateful for ZH. It's never fails to boost my spirit if you can believe that. It's terribly disheartening to try so hard to enlighten people only to be ridiculed for your efforts. I will not give up though; I think of it as an exercise in ego management. For a long time I feared for those who chose to not see the light; now I just hope the best for them.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 11:41 | 6209695 walküre
walküre's picture

some kilo bars should help for your entertainment when it comes crashing down

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:17 | 6209305 Leveraged Algorithm
Leveraged Algorithm's picture

But the bitch would not listen to him.....  They could all be shot.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:32 | 6209347 rejected
rejected's picture

The whole world is a sick puppy. But I don't see how it compares to a wife killing copper, especially when his compatriots hugged him and patted him on the back after witnessing a murder. Defaulting may turn out a good thing for Greece.

 

Coppers in this country (and probably elsewhere) are for sure nothing to be proud of. Like the military they are trained to be proactive and violent... pathetic. 

But one has to wonder what was in the small black box that made the cop surrender.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:33 | 6209353 rubiconsolutions
rubiconsolutions's picture

If one needs proof of the insanity of the financial markets I give you exhibit A

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 09:58 | 6209228 Bill of Rights
Bill of Rights's picture

Greeks Stashing Bundles of Cash in Homes in Fear of 'Grexit'...

 

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jun/16/greece-eurozone-exit-athens...

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 12:28 | 6209916 roadhazard
roadhazard's picture

If they have credit cards over there I'll bet they are maxing them out.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:00 | 6209234 ThirteenthFloor
ThirteenthFloor's picture

One last chance to put the hand in the cookie jar.

Gold is rising fast too

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 09:59 | 6209241 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

if 9:30:00:01AM, BUY MOAR

else

return

 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:02 | 6209254 Philo Beddoe
Philo Beddoe's picture

They forget to hammer Gold and Silver.  Ahhh,,,in due time I guess. 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:05 | 6209259 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Yep, perfectly normal. Nothing strange at all about this. The "market"is done for the day. Go back to your regularly scheduled program citizen.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:05 | 6209260 bbq on whitehou...
bbq on whitehouse lawn's picture

The game for Germany is over, time for them to pay up. Unless Germany wants to leave the euro and join Japan in 30years of deflation.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:15 | 6209300 semperfi
semperfi's picture

fuck Merkel & his neocons, Schauble, etc - mf'g USSA neocon puppets

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:34 | 6209356 SpanishGoop
SpanishGoop's picture

Knowing Germany nowadays, they will find a way to stick the bill to some one else.

 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:06 | 6209262 cn13
cn13's picture

Quit calling them "markets". 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:09 | 6209263 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

  There are no markets... There is only central banks tossing hot potatoes to each other.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:25 | 6209327 ThirteenthFloor
ThirteenthFloor's picture

+1. Or Monkeys behind the curtain juggling plates.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:07 | 6209270 rejected
rejected's picture

Used to laugh when I observed the crooks pump,,, now I just shake my head in disgust.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:32 | 6209348 The Steaksmith
The Steaksmith's picture

Oddly, I used to shake my head in disgust. Now I just laugh.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:09 | 6209280 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

btfath bitchez

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:11 | 6209288 youngman
youngman's picture

A new toy company just IPOed...up 50% right now....we are really stupid....Fitbit...come on....this is our new normal....as we sit on ur couches pigging out on food...we can see our heart rate...wow...I am impressed

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:14 | 6209296 r101958
r101958's picture

As I stated before.....

Tue, 05/26/2015 - 11:34 | 6132563 r101958

"Naaaah! Their line in the sand is 18k, 2.1k and 5k. You watch, it will end around there or better by evening. They will take out the shorts and then have a melt up tomorrow....or even today....on no volume."

Also, most of these 'flash crashes' of whatever....are TPTB testing to see if there is any real market support without them. The 'crash' part of 'flash crash' answers that question.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:17 | 6209303 franzpick
franzpick's picture

The DAX isn't sharing the deluded Yellen doppel-talk: the 9 week decline is saying nein, nein, nein:

http://www.investing.com/indices/germany-30-advanced-chart

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:19 | 6209314 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

someone just fucking kill thee bastards already.

 

round them all the fuck up and shoot them one by one. these bastards need to fucking pay for all the thievery they have committed from the american people  over the past years.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:34 | 6209354 madbraz
madbraz's picture

only thing that matters is that it is quadruple witching, so the corrupt ones will take it wherever they want once again.  there is no need for data, headlines, common sense.  when you can rig it anyway you please and the people in charge of keeping the game honest are either complicit or corrupts this is what happens.

 

they will blame "iliquidity", "algos" etc.   if you want to find blame all you need to do is find out who is behind every big position in the futures market, if the CME would allow you to.

 

the most corrupt stock market (mostly the futures market) in history.

 

 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:52 | 6209414 Blopper
Blopper's picture

I thought the ETF market is even more corrupt.

From my personal analysis, the SPY ETF continue to experience sharp gap/spike up/down by several percentages frequently.

On the other hand, the e-mini S&P500 no longer experience sharp gap/spike up/down since 2012/13. Before this, the amount of sharp gap/spike up/down since 1998 totaled less than 10, compare to many hundreds from the SPY ETF and still taking place from now and then.

So I disagree the futures market (at least for the S&P 500 e-mini) is most corrupt.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 10:47 | 6209394 Blopper
Blopper's picture

First, they will scream "NOOOOOOOOOO!".

Then they will softly say "Yes".

 

There will be NO GREXIT ever.

I am still willing to bet a house or two on this.

No worries as the Rothschilds are behind my back.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 11:01 | 6209473 CHC
CHC's picture

Tomorrow - June 19th - will be THE day to watch - will be very interesting.

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 11:45 | 6209718 walküre
walküre's picture

"priced in" until it isn't...

Fed is obviously ramping the shit out of ES because someone is in desperate search of liquidity and needs to unwind.

EUR rising on perceived Dollar weakness is another one of those fairy tales. How much exposure would anyone seriously add to their EUR position at this point? There are hardly any EURUSD shorts left to squeeze.

 

Thu, 06/18/2015 - 12:37 | 6209978 geno-econ
geno-econ's picture

You can control the markets, but people not so much when they are hungary.  So far they are being fed food and BS

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