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Another Reason Why Stocks Are Surging
Earlier we reported that the biggest catalyst for the overnight surge, first in China and then everywhere else, was China's last-ditch scramble to contain the market crash by literally threatening it would arrest anyone caught "maliciously" shorting/selling stocks.
As it turns out that was not the only catalyst why the Dow Jones is set to open 200 points higher (thus assuring no NYSE breaks today): another one came courtesy of everyone's favorite comedian, newsletter writer, and paper money "trader", Dennis Gartman.
In our own account here… our retirement account… we are as of the close of trading yesterday very, very marginally net short in dollar terms and marginally net short in terms of “beta” for we remain long of “tanker” shares and we are long of steel, having exited our remaining position in a fracking related MLP yesterday and having moved those funds into tankers and steel.
AS always, as old dogs we prefer owning “the things that of dropped on your foot shall hurt” and we shall never, ever understand high-tech, nor big pharma and the like. We leave that to the “kids.” However as we’ve said hear countless times, we have derivatives in place that have our positions hedged and when we sold the remaining “Fracking” related position it reduced the “beta” of our portfolio and worked modestly to our advantage through the close of trading yesterday. It is working to our disadvantage this morning, obviously. We must stress here, however, that we are only marginally net short; certainly we are not materially so...
Don't think of it as $29.95 for a "newsletter", think of its as all the comedy you could possibly buy for one month.
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No one has ever lost money underestimating the intelligence of the American people.
The NUMBER 1 Retard of them ALL, Fartman.
LOSER!
"No one has ever lost money underestimating the intelligence of the American people".
Sadly, that is a quote from Rupert Murdoch. And, even more sadly, he is right and these fuckers know exactly how to use it, especially via the MSM.
As for Gartman, I truly cannot imagine why anyone would continue to pay this person for his "Investment advice" after he has been exposed over and over agin to be a waste of space. Personally, I prefer to remain "pleasantly long" of my own money........."
Tankers and steel..., he forgot coal.
(rare earths, anyone?)
NEWMAN!!
newman without the ability to spell or think ahead--fracking haha. some great attack show here, some coordinated shots are epic looking. http://map.norsecorp.com/
Fake markets that dovetails with fake money, creating a fake euphoria, that transitions into a very fake mind-set...
REALITY will then be outlawed as too harsh to bare... oh wait.....
Cute usage of the word "bare".... Funny
I thought that it was a quote from P. T. Barnum.
It is rallying because I just farted, again!
He's a douche bag...
Look at this: "However as we’ve said hear countless times"
HEAR? HEAR? This imbicile surely meant "HERE" - people pay for this shit?
What's with all the typos?
Was this written with a Spell-Assist, w/o having proof-read it?
high fructose corn syrup is to blame. . .
H.L. Mencken
Explains why the Nobel Prize Winner is always the most admired man in this world in Gallup polls
WAIT a minute !
Obama won the Nobel Prize did he not?
Enough said.
This sounds like a good call to me.
I think the market most impact by a Chinese rush to cash and away from all credit period is credit.
No country has more debt than the USA...with little to no tax base behind it.
We'll see if Chicago does a Puerto Rico here or not.
The. USA is going to eliminate. 100,000 personnel imminently btw...
Zorg: "Fire one million..."
Better contrary indicator than HilsenRat.
what a turd
I just might subscribe to his news letter just so I can take the contrarian bet. This guy is so awful, it seems ike the investment will be well worth it.
Fonz is a Trader or CFP, I believe. I wonder how his career is doing since leaving ZH, and how he views things these days -- both from the theoretical/fundamental perspective, and the pragmatic perspective of actually making money to pay the bills.
A doze of reality can be a very bitter pill to swallow, significantly so when one has pent most his live in a dreamworld
If he was any kind of threat saying to short stocks the S.E.C. would arrest him.
Gartman is a useful idiot though, therefore they put him on air.
Joe LaBologna of DeutschDrugMoneyLaundering Bank up next.
You mentioned the SEC and it got me to wonderin', how many Federal Agencies are there in the Federal Government? A reasonably thorough (not confined to internet) search has shown me that the U.S. Government does not have any idea how many agencies and programs exist under their umbrella.
Frankly, that scares the shit out of me!
Here you go:
https://www.usa.gov/federal-agencies/a
Fartman is easy $ baby ! I'm long the S&P today for sure !
https://goo.gl/AgTCFE - Bernie Sanders isn't going to save America, for that matter, neither is Rand, but I'd take Rand's medicine over Bernie's
Stocks are surging because of false hope.
That's what Gartman and his ilk sell: Hope. Just like the Politicians, Hope and Change, followed by a Lieing corrupt fat dyke cunt.......And there are enough suckers out there.
ALL OF YESTERDAYS LOSSES WILL BE WIPED OUT WITHIN THE FIRST 5 MINUTES OF TRADING.
HANG THESE FUCKING BANKERS ALREADY, LET ISIS TAKE CARE OF THEM, ALL OF THEM. AMERICAN, EUROPEAN, ASIAN, WHOMEVER, FUCK THEM ALL.
Might have rigged the wrong casino if the Black Flags come pouring forth.
No way do I believe this guy does what he says....he'd have been completely broke 2 years ago.
His newsletter sales could cover his trading losses.
no he can actually afford to be wrong on every trade cuz so many fucktards still pay for his newsletter
...
Stocks are up at the open because price is managed and therefore a meaningless measurement of the company. Stock price management is apparently used for central policy planning, fraud and theft only.
There is no market.
"There is no Market."
Not here, not in the EU, Japan, or... China. China is playing both sides, and ALL only for its own benefit, IOW... Same As Always, in the last 3000 years.
So much for China being any kind of Beacon for genuine Capitalism, or of backing it's currency with Gold. Like I said many times: China is merely playing to deal itself into its share at the SDR table of currency allocation.
I'd sooner entrust my money to Cartman than Gartman.
Seriously, this clown has made a career out of inaccurately predicting the past.
ZeroHedge you finally got Stopler to quit coming around here. Drag this bitch through the mud in a few more articles and we'll get rid of him too.
Repeating 'only marginally short' = you're entire retirement is now up against the FED.
Since it's evident English isn't Gartman's first language, what is? Lithuanian?
Gartman reminds me of the "Mush" character in the movie "A Bronx Tale" (great film btw).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PLSyFzk-6g
AS always, as old dogs we prefer owning “the things that of dropped on your foot shall hurt” and we shall never, ever understand high-tech, nor big pharma and the like. We leave that to the “kids.”
Puked in my mouth a bit. What a guy.
If he says put it in his mouth, you ram it in his ass. Always fade what Gartman says.
clown indeed, i wonder when they are going to pull the plug, we should brace ourselves coz the landing is going to be hard. somehow silver is sold-out in Germany, the stock market is really strange!
Well worth the $400/yr - or whatever it is now - to fade his calls
"the things that if dropped on your foot shall hurt..." have hurt alot more than your foot, you bearded clown
I've subscribed to Gartman Letter, but I pay $ 400 a month to read his good advice! How can I spend less?
you can't. just keep paying that 400/month and make sure you follow his every trade. congratulations on your new subscription!