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Dow Futures 'Rally' 150 Points Off Opening Lows Into Positive Territory On Greek Makeshift "Deal" Chatter

Submitted by Tyler Durden on 07/12/2015 23:14 -0400

We have detailed just what a total farce of a day this has been in Brussels, but even more farcical is the reaction in equity markets in the last few minutes...

Because it wouldn't be a stock market if buying the dip didn't work...

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Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:16 | 6304652 macambaman

Off the lows, to new highs.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:19 | 6304660 44MagnumPrepper

So fucking sick of greece drama. They're like the kardashians of the financial world.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:39 | 6304691 SHEEPFUKKER

Buy only bitches

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:44 | 6304696 Gaius Frakkin' ...

Just how much farther do these dumb-fucks think this one can go without more juice? Yeah, it's going higher eventually, but it's gonna take some new financial chicanery to light the fire. Old joo hag coughing “higher rates” isn't gonna do it... Is it the real economic growth they see? Haha... don't make me laugh.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:55 | 6304714 y3maxx

Great time to be "Thug for hire, suicider".

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:33 | 6304751 Hongcha

Rally on; this evening we take another step closer to an important top. They are really prolonging this moneyshot, they know there's nothing left in the sack. I mean, look at what China had to do. I want my 2009-2011 short money back.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 03:39 | 6304883 StackShinyStuff

DEAL! (Quick - act surprised)

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:15 | 6304906 Eirik Magnus Larssen

Heheh. Even Zero Hedge's perma-bears sound a bit exasperated.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 01:01 | 6304774 ebworthen

No, no; Northern Europe is the Kardashians, the south including Greece is the tits and pung-tang.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 01:08 | 6304778 Proofreder

Poontang

From the Ilocano dialect "putang" ...

_{rumored to be a great fuck in the Phillipines}

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 01:32 | 6304791 Squid-puppets a...

Europe is the Kardashians, Greece is Kanye West's wang

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:16 | 6304654 ShortTheUS

Either Greece grabs its ankle's and takes it in the AcropolASS or say goodbye to this rally.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:51 | 6304709 disabledvet

I agree.

Fun to watch though.
"Dark pools of Soros" are very deep indeed apparently.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:05 | 6304726 Id fight Gandhi

Market expected the last minute Sunday night deal. It didn't happen. So pump the futures and unload cash markets in the morning.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:17 | 6304655 This is it

Oh-so-bullish.

Higher lows and higher highs.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:20 | 6304662 stormsailor

and your suprised? damn you must have played peek-a-boo till you were 10 years old

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:23 | 6304665 NDXTrader

Just rational to expect these slimy f*ckers won't leave the room until they can declare some kind of victory or run out of crepes

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:23 | 6304666 Uncle Sugar

If Greece can string the Germans out this long, just think how long the U.S. will be able to kick the can.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:51 | 6304707 TahoeBilly2012

4ever...not, but close

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:08 | 6304729 runningman18

Different situation entirely. The U.S. uses its printing press to kick the can, and it's able to use the printing press to such an extent because the dollar is the only currency with world reserve status. Once that is gone (by early next year), the can will be kicked for the last time. The U.S. will go down far faster than Greece...

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:23 | 6304668 TheReverend

This is because the market is being ruled by HFT algorithms. Not by common sense or people anymore.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:26 | 6304671 NDXTrader

I'm not sure why anyone cares about this...just take everything you own and invest in the Chinese market. It's now illegal for it to go down

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:32 | 6304682 FreeShitter

All time highs in the US markets by August 1st and there will be no sept-oct crash......The TPTB will own everyone and your soul before the ponzi collapses.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:01 | 6304722 disabledvet

I don't see any way around an equity correction in the near term...you might ultimately be right though.

That doesn't mean a rush to treasuries...a position and play I am almost tapped out in actually.

Maybe a week or two more.

Weak dollar does not surprise me...but that is the Tower of Terror in my book because there is still no recovery, Canada is heading south in a hurry and these crazy dopes keep banging on Putin's door.

The. Wreckage from "Fuck the EU" has been darn impressive!

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:16 | 6304738 runningman18

Massive correction by Fall after Fed raises rates, the BRICS take over Greece, and China's continued bubble burst hits the West full on, probably accompanied by a few terrorist attacks or cyber attacks for good measure to keep the sheeple distracted...

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:36 | 6304687 thismarketisrigged

of course, the negativity is nonstop over the weekend, but once the futures open, must let out some bs rumor to pump the ''markets'' for the next day.

this was so fucking predictable.

this ''market'' is a fucking joke and i hope it crashes and burns and takes all the 1 percenter piece of shits with it.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:40 | 6304694 FreeShitter

The .01% will short the market when it comes time and will walk away with trillions when it happens. The rest of course, will be eating their pet's favorite food.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:44 | 6304699 Kaiser Sousa

geez...why so happy and full of hope....

just fucking with ya...

Got Gold or Silver?

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 03:07 | 6304865 kareninca

No, we will be eating the food that their pets reject.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:42 | 6304695 adr

The market won't go down willingly. It will take hanging bankers from lampposts before it does.

Real change only comes through the spilling of blood. Around the world I hope the next revolution finally kills the right people.

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:48 | 6304703 nomorebuyins

Sounds like everything is still great, yaaay!

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:48 | 6304704 nomorebuyins

Woohoo!

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:49 | 6304705 VWAndy

What taxpayers are paying for this bit o fiat magic?

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:50 | 6304706 nomorebuyins

Jenner effect

Sun, 07/12/2015 - 23:54 | 6304713 Yen Cross

Oil is getting monkey hammered.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:18 | 6304740 fowlerja

Wow... I did not realize that what happened to Greece today so profoundly effected the financial statements of so many corporations...guess I have so much to learn..

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:37 | 6304757 henry chucho

It all makes sense,when you realize 2 billion Chinese investors can't sell their Amerikan stocks,either..

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:45 | 6304763 Bastiat

Beer goggles!

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 00:54 | 6304770 IridiumRebel

GREEN MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!
My buying cock is pushing the pelvis of 10K shares of GoPro!

Fuck yeah!!!
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
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BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
BUY BUY BUY BUY BUBUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY
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Mon, 07/13/2015 - 01:21 | 6304784 Proofreder

Dude - you forgot to look at the chart -

GoPro is in a definite downtrend; put option at 55 might make a few fiats

Forget it, BFTD - you know you want it, come get it - do it Monday!

_{or Tuesday, or Wednesday, or … There be dip$ galore coming $oon to a roller coaster ride near you.}

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 01:01 | 6304775 orangegeek

It's that fat fucking cunt yellen leading the bid.

BUY MOAR AAPL YELLEN YOU PIECE OF SATANTIC SHIT!!!

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 02:30 | 6304843 FreedomGuy

Extend and pretend. Does any rational person even remotely think that Greece will actually pay it's debts? It never will. The only question is when and how it will default. That is what the talks, the markets and investors should be working on.

The rest is fantasy...like stock prices.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:55 | 6304863 kareninca

Look, the Chinese have shown our overseers that all a government has to do is once a day write a number on a placard and photograph it and tell the serfs that it is the DOW/Nikkei/Shanghai level: and the serfs will happily accept it. They had already determined that telling the serfs that unemployment and inflation were low, with a couple of charts, was enough to satisfy them; this extra technique is a bonus. We will happily swallow any excrement they feed us - so why shouldn't futures rally now??

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:33 | 6304916 TheRideNeverEnds

Everyday is a buy, today is no different.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:33 | 6304917 TheRideNeverEnds

Everyday is a buy, today is no different.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:37 | 6304919 Maestro Maestro

Anybody who buys stocks and bonds now is an enemy of the human race.

Mon, 07/13/2015 - 04:51 | 6304928 bigkahuna

the HFTs have become self aware ... oh no

Dow Futures 'Rally' 150 Points Off Opening Lows Into Positive Territory On Greek Makeshift "Deal" Chatter

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