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One Has To Laugh
So according to today's headlines, bonds yields are rising on "rate hike expectations"...
... while stocks are rising because the data is bad enough to delay a rate hike.
We will refrain from commenting on this endless farce, aside to note that the Fed would save everyone a lot of energy, nerves and vocal cords if it merely announced what the closing price in the S&P is every day and just do away with "trading" and "markets" entirely.
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here is your 100% proof : this economy is a big joke , unreal
More like a practical joke and we're on the recieving end of it.....
tyler manipulation...
remove your eyes from your ass, it's 2 different source of information; 2 different editorial, so as many interpretation.
it would be lame if 2 titles were from same website, but it's not...
so what, one is correct and the other is not ? then what...
we all gonna die and the shit is running until 2100.
https://i.imgur.com/DqIJ5Ex.jpg
Wow. Are you serious? Tylers are well aware of the two different sources. It would be *even more* lame if they came from the same website, true, but coming from two different websites is still quite lame. Interest rates rise on *good* economic data - not bad data like ADP payrolls. Stocks *like* bad data - like the bad ADP payrolls report - because it indicates a lower probability that the Fed moves to raise rates in September. Get it? The whole point is that what has traditionally been the case no longer applies. Stocks love bad news now and bond yields are moving contrary to common sense. I feel like I just had to explain a joke, which of course, makes it less funny.
Headline. WORLD ENDS....STOCKS CLOSE AT RECORD HIGHS
if it merely announced what the closing price in the S&P is every day and just do away with "trading" and "markets" entirely.
But then how would the free and fair financial press of the West laugh at Chinese manipulation of their markets?
They could go back to working the street corners like the ones they came from. Cramer in fishnet stocking in the back alley.....
Buying stocks now is like putting rocks in your pockets before you go swimming.
Headline writing robots randomly generate narrative fallacies.
Laugh now or cry later.
Duck or grouse.Sign over a low doorway in my favorite english pub.
Your having a laugh
in slang
Your having a bath
Guess that's where the bubbles come from!
Get up them apples ,on your plates,have a laugh, and make sure you do your boat.
The addiction to heroin will go away if we increase the dosage.
Yup. I watched it all this morning. The bad numbers rolled in, and stocks took off. Of course, the Dow futures were up 0.8 before open. So, a lot of this has to do with the dollar.
When the average Lumpen is this stupid:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiZFXkmofgI
Anything goes...and nothing matters.
That is pretty funny, in a twisted, we're-all-gonna-die, way.
Funny and scary.
The idiot box (my dad's phrase for the TV) has conditioned so many over the years.
#yourfuckingstupidopinionisbullshit
What part of the stawk market has become a policy tool do these idiots not understand? We are to the point where a lousy 2% pull back kills CONfidence and any eCONomic activity. There are NO fucking markets left.
"One Has To Laugh"
When I was single, and before kids, I laughed. Now I cry.
<siiiiigggghhhhhhhh....>
"Look over here, look over there"
Are we having fun yet?
I'd laugh but it stopped being funny eight years ago
That's one of the best of the best ZH writeups!
Sums up the economy in two lines!
Marketwatch is the drag queen of financial 'news' propaganda.
So more Ru Paul than Caitlyn.
There is NO reality - it's all perception. It's only your perception that you have freedoms and rights.
One does not "Have to laugh," if you are a journalist in this environment, you have to "Make shit up."
These headlines are mostly being generated by algorithms. Disturbingly, High Frequency Trading algorithms in turn track them for key words or phrases as their "buy" or "sell" signals. Direct human interaction is gradually phased out.
Priceline is the economy. Weaker payroll data means that people have less money to buy gold. LOL.
Whats the big deal. Bad news makes the market go up. Thats how its supposed to work, right?
Its a ponzi world with a serious case of Alzheimer's thrown in.
Headlines we'd like to see:
US Stocks Arise Amidst Central Bank Balance Sheet Expansion.
Treasury Yields Rise Central Bank Rate-Hike That Have No Merit.
They want you gold bugs to sell your metal and buy stocks.
AU is down another 0.5% today. Correction -0.6%.
And, I am offering $750/oz to anyone who sees the writing on the wall and decides to get out before all of your shiny yellow becomes just paperweights. Because I am a nice guy that only wants to help.
PS. The price offered will drop daily so don't miss your chance to get out now.
...to keep from crying.
I seen that headlne this morning just after Disney stunk up the place and just shook my head. The Naz rips up 70 points WTF. It is just kinda sad at this point.
'price insesitive buyers'
Three days down
Something had to be done
A matter of national security
Can't let bear market chatter take hold
Whatever the headlines say is of little import, the economy is very healthy and the dollar is strong with the full faith and backing of the US Government.
What's another $5/oz between friends?
I Am COMEX gold.
technicals mother fuckers
Tyler, your last paragraph is the comment of the week.
Just remember Oil Is the Bright Spot in the US Economy.... oh wait..
The government must be using Priceline to ship drugs cheaper.
yes, the almighty priceline now all of the sudden drives the ''market''
this shit is so comical.
cat, wmt, dis, nope, those companies r irrelevant, pcln baby!!!!!!!!!!! wooooooooooooooooooooooooo