Here Comes The Plunge Protection Team

Tyler Durden's picture

Losses have been cut in half after the opening collapse as a mysterious buyer in massive size lifts The Dow 600 points off its lows, cutting losses in half for now...

 

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Sturm und Drang's picture

Smith & or Dan?

 

Oh, wait, THAT Wesson. Won't they need a TARP then?

Sturm und Drang's picture

Stawks will have as much value as the FRN then.

rwe2late's picture

Mt. Doom will have the

"one ring to rule them all".

 

(It's a real-life global Monopoly game,

and one player will eventually buy up all the property because he is the "bank"

with an endless supply of monopoly money.)

 

angryoldbastard's picture

Too late PPT jerks!

Just sold SPXS at $24.40 - for a 30% gain in a week!

 

S&P close around 1911 today...

ymom11's picture

BTFD YOU FEGGITS

saints51's picture

This is so awesome and people still think this is normal.

Winston Smith 2009's picture

Hopefully, by the end of day they'll lose their ass and be forced to say, "Hmmm, we really need to change those algos." 

New_Meat's picture

Algoz been optimized for continual up market, not so much experience with this shitstorm.

Winston Smith 2009's picture

Thus, the need to change them.

My buy algo trips at DOW/2.

Bossman1967's picture

Why dont they use plunge protection on the hard working peoples checking accounts

Calculus99's picture

If anyone says 'nobody could see this coming; they should be -

1. Taken out at dawn

2. Shot

3. Family gets an invoice for a) the ammo, and b) the wages of the shooters.

mydogisprettierthanyou's picture

Dont forget the obamacare bill for body disposal and $13 asprins.

Keltner Channel Surf's picture

Had one of their beers this weekend, quite tasty, you gotta take the bad with the good, I guess.

Usurious's picture

those monks sure know how to brew beer.

robertocarlos's picture

There's nothing else to do.

debtor of last resort's picture

Haha! The money on the sidelines? These fucking maggots print this casino into oblivion. What does your dollar buy you granny?

lasvegaspersona's picture

THis is becoming so obvious that even Muppets might catch on...discretion is advised...

Rathmullan's picture

Yep. This market's being laid dow like a little baby. Started with the "chinese communist party" deciding and managing to hold 3200 on the SSE Comp last night. Orderly panic.

Karl von Bahnhof's picture

Will finish in green today!

/s

xcehn's picture

A small window for those that didn't sell weeks ago. Get out while you still can.

ebworthen's picture

Which FEDhead will say something about not raising rates today to try and jawbone stocks?

TeethVillage88s's picture

I guess after this week, they could proclaim they believed the rate hikes were already priced in from the China Massacre.

Azannoth's picture

Financed with naked Gold/Silver shorts I bet

gatorengineer's picture

AAPL 10 percent in 5 minutes on NO volume..... Cool.  No one who owned AAPL had a stop in apparently.

I Write Code's picture

is it too late for me to sell last Wednesday?

poldark's picture

PPT did not do much good. Dow now down 1000pts again.

Ms No's picture

Good luck shining up this turd... remember China will open again.  On the brights side copper and oil might end up being free at this rate.  We have war risk too (another explosion in Japan and a bunch of other stuff last night) supressing gold is about to get really phucking expensive.

Montani Semper Liberi's picture

 You may have a drawing of a dead cat on that chart later today.

gatorengineer's picture

The French PPT must be taking today off, down 8.63%

IridiumRebel's picture

Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Gooooooo!

DOW was sitting on a mountain top.
30,000 feet to drop.
Tied me on a runaway horse
Uh huh, that's right, of course.
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Go, Kevin Henry!

One day, I met a girl named Janet.
She was the savior of then planet.
I'm Kevin, the kind of guy
Who can't stand to see a little girl cry.
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Go, Kevin Henry!

Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Gooooooo!

I was riding on a Dark Pool scene
Got a message from my FED RES queen.
She was hanging on a fishing line.
Mr. Yellen didn't waste no time!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Go, Kevin Henry!

Once upon a time, I went insane.
Got a ticket on a DC plane.
Mr. Henry didn't need no chute!
DOW was high and ready to boot!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, Kevin Henry! Go, Kevin Henry!

Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Kevin Henry to the rescue!
Go, PPT! Go, PPT!

Keltner Channel Surf's picture

Hey, I don't recall seeing you at the last Financial Parody Union meeting :)    Nice job, but be careful, these things can be strongly addicting ...

IridiumRebel's picture

I would love to become the head lyricist.....

As you can see, I do an ok job.

 

 

Keltner Channel Surf's picture

There's a good chance I'll be winding down by mid-Sept, done over 130 this year and need a break, so why not send in your resume to Tyler?

Keltner Channel Surf's picture

Yep, 137 to be precise, have to track 'em in a spreadsheet

sTls7's picture

Big Money... saves the day... but maybe not?

Latitude25's picture

Do you trust the fat finger of CONfidence?

TeethVillage88s's picture

Possible Planned Collapse?

What are the possible reasons?

- Chinese & US Markets were over-valued

- They want to prepare for war, Currency Crisis, Liquidity Crisis, Credit Crisis, Immigration Crisis, Food Crisis, Terror Crisis, Tax Hike for Federal Debt Crisis & States Sovereign Bond Crisis

- Deflation Spotted

- All Governments Globally are ready to Reset, Write off Debt, Move to new Currency, Join GLobal Government

Latitude25's picture

The objective:  Make all workers worldwide work for Chinese and Indian wages with the bankers as lords and masters.

hotrod's picture

How come PPT did not step in to buy my gold and silver stocks????

user2011's picture

Let me guess.   The following steps of us gov to stop plunging.

1. outlaw shorts

2. have fbi arrest agrressive shorts

3. Tell the media to spread the news that patriots must buy stock to fight against foreigner attacks on our financial system

 

fromthinair's picture
fromthinair (not verified) Aug 24, 2015 8:57 AM

There is no market. This is not a struggle of a free market. Along with PPT, it is set of speculators betting and fighting against each other causing massive collateral damage.. Monday close will give some clues.

Argenta's picture

At the same time, my friend Silver is getting its ass handed to it.  The gold/silver ratio now stands at 78.6.  So as we marvel at indices that trade at 50-60 times forward earnings on average, we may also be amazed at how cheap silver is relative to gold, given the historical ratio of 16:1.  Both will correct.  One already is starting to, it seems.

-Argenta

jakesdad's picture

anyone want to start a pool on the # of "v"s we get today?