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"JPM Omen 2.0" Sparks Stock Pump'n'Dump After Crude Surges'n'Purges
In the paraphrased words of JPMorgan's head quant, "We're halfway there" for the selling... and yes it appears "we are living on a [Fed/PBOC/ECB/BOJ] prayer"
But...the message from the mainstream media remains the same...
Everything trades on fun-durr-mentals... Spot The Difference!
Volume was terrible...
And once again they messed with VIX to ensure a green close for the S&P...
Here's your stock market today... in the words of one wizened trader "gamma bitches!"
Cash indices closed mixed with Small Caps and Nasdaq red...
And while Trannies briefly got into the green for the week, it did not last...
Some context for the bounce... The Dow is back at 50% of the loss...
Once again VIX was battered lower into the close - because why wouldn't you sell vol into tomorrow's cliffhanger payrolls print!!??
Once again credit markets moved lower first - leading stocks...
Treasury yields dropped on Draghi's QE promise then spiked along with stocks early on (30Y up to 2.98%) but bonds were quickly bid after that and closed modestly lower (note the steepening holding into tomorrow's payroll print)
The Dollar jumped as Draghi's QE promise sunk the EUR. USDJPY was unable to hold up its 120 tractor beam...(Note SEK roundtripped against the USD despite its actions)
Commodities were mixed but silver crude and copper all ramped early on.. only to giove it all back later...
Another day in paradise for crude traders as yesterday's purge-n-surge becomes today's surge-n-purge...
Charts: Bloomberg
Bonus Chart: About those nasty Chinese devaluers??
Bonus Bonus Chart: This is the worst 3 months for Risk-Parity funds since the financial crisis...
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FANG stocks finish lower before jobs data.
They should change that to FAGN or GAFN or FAGooN or FAGNet
The Chinese gov should imprison him
it's all good...even the bacon.
Just need a fresh roll of duct tape for tomorrow and then time for their weekend binge of whores and hopium.....
Everybody is screaming "This fall", but after so many false alarms I have a feeling this shit show will continue on alot longer.
To paraphrase Zappa
The illusion of the market will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater.”agreed it will be death by algorithm when they are ready,not human hands,when,how,why etc will be unexpected but not necessarily for a while yet
Well I had to laugh at those Mayan Calendar doomers but the fourth Blood Moon in a tetrad that is the fourth to have ever occurred on major Jewish holidays? Dear God, this has to be it!
Miffed;-)
I agree as I am hoping too. Nothing happens I will just slowly leave the ZH scene, grab a crown/coke, swallow the blue pill, and enjoy life like the rest of the zombie horde.
if only it were that easy... a friend of mine stopped reading financial blogs like ZH, all news outlets including the web (funny considering he's a programmer and on the web all day) and he is much happier. he knows the inevitable will come but doesn't care. He figures he is single, has no debt and a house paid off and is relativiely intelligent working for a 100k give or take a few thousand....so his way of beating the system is not to particate in a 401k, ira, brokerage at all and spend his money on vacations in different parts of the world spending all his money so he loses no purchasing power in a savings account and spending on small mom and pop business owners as to not feed the corporate beast..
I agree with him too. I think we all need a break from this website time to time. This place is addictive, but it is not the articles I'd miss, it is the members. I enjoy everyone's company even the trolls.
It's nice to read things from people whose heads aren't mush.
It really is nice. I wish Zh had some convention we could all meet, but then I realized we would probably be black bagged and in Guantanamo that same day. Since we believe in the Constitution, we are the enemy and I am cool with that.
A ZH convention would be false-flagged for sure... and then blamed on us
Amen, agree with all the comments above. Most often I just read the title of the aricle and scroll down to the comments and I get the just of the article. It's very rare that I meet people who are aware and capable of critical thinking.
Yup. This site is an oasis of knowledge and hope.
Only problem with that is he may just live to see retirement. Then what?
Then he can join the FSA or do a Logan's Run.
Groundhog - Enourage to hedge wih the 3 B's. Buliion. bullets. beans. Then go have fun and enjoy the Dark Carnival cycle :)
Shemitah ends on the 13th, Jade Helm on the 15th, so it's all going down on the 14th, Blackerest Monday. Or it would if there was any sense of dramatic justice in this shitshow. But there ain't, so it will be just another blue Monday and toss this latest expired omen on the pile.
Well let me get this out in the open before someone says the next end of the world date is.....
Shemitah ends this month but the Jubilee begins due to this being the 50 year in the cycle. I believe this jubilee is #70 and God loves the number 7. Last one of significance like this jubilee is supposedly 70AD and you can read about it when Paul writes to Titus who destroyed the temple in the new testament labeled "Titus".
I may be wrong on some of my facts so do check me and not take my word.
Last one of significance like this jubilee is supposedly 70AD
But what year was it in the Jewish calendar? Or maybe the Myan calendar, or Chinese calendar, is opperative. Everything needs to be recalculated. Or maybe a new calendar invented.
Numerology is not easy. If it was everybody would be doing it.
OK so you call yourself a critical thinker yet you believe the day of reckoning (global crash) will be chosen through religion and random numbers? This is so ridiculous I can't even begin to fathom what you're trying to say.
Yes it might be planned ahead of time, but still nothing to do with religion.
There's one guy who already made a killing on the Shemitah. Jonathon Cahn.
Johnathon Con....you mean
Never waste a good crisis...even a hypothetical one
Like all charlatans; he mixes some truth with obvious lies and makes a ton of $$$ on the unregenerate Christian (no such thing really, for they are self-deceived) & the mystical types. We, as a nation and a world, are already under God's judgment; you have to be brain dead not to see that.
Where is the chart that shows the direct correlation from biblical authority and the disintegration of the nation? It is shaped like this ( < ) with the upward trend of immorality corresponding to the disposition of godliness. It is man's history and for most; their demise.
Therefore as man believes technology and accolades means he is evolving (humanism is the religion); the few see the veracity of the word of God as man descends into a immoral sewer so bad that a NYC rat would turn the other way.
The Shemitah is only a week away,but just like the millenium and 2012 I fear all that will happen is that some books,cds and survival stuff gets sold
Next thing to look for is the shmata.
If you are reconciled to Christ; none of it matters because He has already overcome all evil; including most of you.
Oh man. So now I got nothing to look forward to?
Well, there's always the Rapture or Opening of the 7th Seal
a dishtowel?
"The only function of economic forecasting is to make astrology look respectable"
-Some asshole economist
Actually...
http://cosmicconvergence.org/?p=11090
There is something to it, but the question is: will something come FROM it? The more people that are aware, the less impact it will have - if there was anything to it to begin with.
Who is to say the Mayan calendar was wrong? It was the end/beginning of ages. Perhaps TPTB had a quick Facetime and decided on their final steps for transition and here we are today. I realize it all started long ago but maybe that was the day they all finally agreed to pull the plug on the old way and finally take over the entire world or destroy it.
Also, since there was no year zero; are we not actually in 2014?
I don't believe the music on the Titanic ever stopped. They just kept playing until they were underwater.
Expect more of the same.
Also expect the same actions of the few .01% as they do the present day equivalent of dressing up like ladies to get onto the lifeboats. At least those not already on safe land.
It's the endgame now. The PTB are losing control of the shit show. Savour every day of relative normalcy left.
"Market history tells us that regardless of the Central Banks’ intentions to drive the market higher, the overall market can overwhelm the Central Banks. Last Monday [August 24th Dow 1,000 point intra-day crash] is an example of that. – Craig “Turd Ferguson” Hemke on Shadow of Truth"
http://investmentresearchdynamics.com/sot-56-craig-hemke-the-existing-gl...
These stick saves towards the end seem to be more difficult to achieve.
I think the house of cards is about to come down.
They do seem to become more expensive by the day...
Yeah those 1s and 0s are costly.
They are costly. And the cost comes in the form of lost market faith, which is the only currency that matters now...
Agreed. 90% chance this month, 100% chance this year.
Yup. In fact, I think the only question at this point is: is Jesus a Pleaidian, an Acturian, a Sirian, or a shadow government GMO black-budget human who will decend on a black-budget space ship to take us all to Nirvana?
The first one will be a fraud.
Project Blue Beam
Repent or die in your sin and spend your eternity with Jamie Dimon and Barrack Obama; really.
Who do you say Jesus Is? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBfcnp0dcKM
I never thought this charade could go on so long but given that it has I don't understand why it cant continue longer. Why do you think this month is the month that things come unhinged?
Not speaking for Team, but this is why *I* think something might happen this month: http://cosmicconvergence.org/?p=11090
Just scroll down to that chart which shows all the crashes that have happened every seven years since 1966. That alone is creepy enough to warrant further investigation.
Now you just pushed it into 2016.
"Float On" by Modest Mouse
I backed my Swiss trade into a pin-bar the other day
Well it missed my stop, sometimes life's OK
My margin fell off a bit too much, oh what can I say
Well, the clerk just laughed it off, said it’s OK
And the tenge floats on OK, and the ruble floats on OK
They'll all float on anyway
A fake QE rumor took out every last stop with that slam
Not worth it to try to beat their sleight of hand
Bad news comes but only shakes out the weak hands
It’s good news that will waylay all your plans
The aussie and euro dived on exactly the same day
Well the yuan floats on, no news is good today
And we'll all float on OK
Already we'll all float on alright
Don't worry if your margin ends up a bit too heavy
We'll all float on alright
Do they float?
Float? The clown’s grin widened. 'Oh yes, indeed they do. They float! And there’s cotton candy...'
Georgie reached...
Sorry, Mr. S., I've never read any Stephen King, but if you'd have quoted Kafka, Nietzsche, Joyce or Pynchon, I might have gotten the reference.
I'm busy hunting down old copies of scholarly works authored by Jim Jam Jems.
...he says to Schopenhauer, who authored:
"...all human action (is) the product of a blind, insatiable, and malignant metaphysical will."
I think he had something there...
The only choice a natural human has is "what sin shall I commit" and just do it.
Well done
I could really use a lot less of the JPM references. They are responsible for this fucking mess and will be the ones selling and making money shorting this bastardized farce of a "market".
Fuck you Dimon and your useless minions.
The only news I want to hear about Jamie Dimon is how long his legs twitched when he was hung.
Otherwise fuckem.
bring on deer herd friday
anybody shorting the market at the start of football season through New Years hates money
According to MarketWatch.com:
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/panel-of-ex-fed-officials-say-no-rate-h...
Panel of ex-Fed officials say no rate hike will come at September meeting
Published: Sept 3, 2015 1:46 p.m. ET
By Greg Robb
Senior economics reporter
The global economic outlook has worsened since the Federal Reserve’s last meeting in July, which will lead the U.S. central bank to hold off on lifting interest rates in September, a panel of former Fed officials agreed Thursday.
The global economic situation has deteriorated and “not by a trivial amount,” said Joseph Gagnon, a former Fed staffer and now senior fellow at the Peterson Institute for International Economics.
Global stock markets are down 5% to 10% since the Fed last met, and the dollar is up 2% on a broad trade-weighted basis, he noted.
“The Fed has cultivated this recovery so carefully, with such enormous effort, for over the last seven years — are you really going to take the risk in this environment with unstable global financial markets and real macroeconomic questions about the global outlook that are not just about volatility?” asked Julia Coronado, chief economist at Graham Capital Management .
The former Fed officials spoke at a panel discussion sponsored by the Brookings Institution.
Jon Faust, a professor of economist at Johns Hopkins University and a former adviser to Chairwoman Janet Yellen, said Fed officials will delay, awaiting the “macrosignal” behind the recent market turmoil.
Donald Kohn, who served at the Fed for 40 years and ended up as its vice chairman, said two things would make him hesitate to hike rates if he were voting at the September meeting: very low inflation and low market expectations of a September move due to recent market volatility.
Kohn said he would want the Fed statement after its September meeting to stress that rates will rise before the end of the year. “That will help build in the expectation of higher rates later this year and put that in the markets, so when I finally did move it wouldn’t be such a surprise,” he said.
Fed officials have argued that the timing of the first rate hike doesn’t matter as much of the path of interest rates. They have stressed that the rate path is likely to be a gradual one.
Coronado took issue with this, saying it was “not entirely true for the markets that translate Fed policy.” A September move would be a “big surprise” and viewed as a “policy mistake,” she said.
Coronado said there were less than 20% chance of a rate hike in September. Gangnon, Kohn and Faust said the odds were higher but still less than 50%.
In the 3rd world kidnapping for ransom is a popular pastime.
I personally know a few former kidnap victims.
When times get tough, those at the helm of $ better watch out for the needy and angry will be looking for them :)
Just the participation in this article discussion is all you need to know. Last week the daily close blog post was like the Apocalypse begun. Now its back to your regular schedule tv program. This is usually when muppets get slaughtered.
Who needs the Olympics when we have Tom Brady!
It's a shame 99% of Americans can't do a 7th grade proportion
P1V1/T1=P2V2/T2
The entire thing was a hoax....ever heard of bread and circuses?
1 + 1 = 3
The only thing that is happening is the primary dealers and the HFT traders are playing ping pong with a Fed/BIS built robot.
There are no muppet customers.
There are no pension funds with any political capital.
It's just one robot bouncing a ball back to another robot.
And just like the occasional router or server, the configuration is so complex nobody understands how it works so they just unplug it for a few minutes and reset back to "normal."
If that kind of "market" gives YOU confidence then trade away!
What I see is that crude is still up $9 from the start of that end of August fuckjob we went through.
The intraday moves are meaningless if it means over the course of a week crude ends up 40% higher.
Consumers are being ass raped by a San Francisco S&M porno director.
Most Americans support AS* Raping; note the corporate sponsors and how many out there use these routinely? You wonder how a small fraction can have such a great impact. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWZBKMwFSH0
Everything is fine. No problems.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlVmdGiAH2A
That alone should tell everyone that this whole business is a scam.
...cliffhanger payrolls print = lulz
You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe... [/Morpheus]
sure...as opposed to the first day they published that nonsense last Thursday
Just so long as they can get SPY in the 200-202 range before the front month hedges roll off in two weeks we are all good.
long time lurker here folks, finally got off my lazy ass and signed up for an accoount... Reason? It's one of the few places I enjoy reading the comments as much as the articles. My 2 unknown matrerial cents is I can clearly see where this high stakes poker market is headed, and it's for fools and the 1%, (and a few lucky suns a biches that can't help being lucky) I l on the other hand that doesn't have a lucky bone in my body, prefer to keep the hard earned denarius in my errr, secret hiding spots where I know it's real and will be there when the curtains drop. We all know it's coming and mathematically inevitable... So until that day arrives, stack happy my fellow smarty pants!
ZH, you're scaring the crap outta me posting a video of men in tight jeans and perms.
Heres a better one.
https://youtu.be/OnFMQ2NAgyk