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A Warning For The Bears: Gartman Goes Short S&P Futures, "Very Worried In Catholic Terms"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Will Gartman make it 4 out of 4 this week?

As a reminder, Tuesday Gartman came out swing bearish and stocks soared. On Wednesday, he was bullish and stocks staged a late tumble. On Thursday, Gartman exhausted from all the flip-flopping refused to virtually trade virtual money, and said he was "flat and nervous". Stocks, not knowing how to fade that, closed virtually unchanged. To wit:

Tuesday - bearish:

Trend Line Support, We Fear, Is A Very Long Way Down: This is a sobering thought, but this chart… which we included in our commentary yesterday… should give everyone a case of very real concern for support for the S&P is several hundred points below where the market closed on Friday. Strength is to be sold into.... We remain here at TGL modestly net short of the market generally and we’ve no intention of changing that focus other than to become a bit shorter still as time and market conditions demand.

Wednesday - bullish:

In our retirement fund here at TGL… the only money which we manage directly… we came into yesterday’s session decently net short; not aggressively so, but not marginally so either. However, it made no difference; we were short in a rampaging bullish move and we had no choice but to rush to cover much of the net short position immediately upon the opening of trade on the NYSE.... Within moments of the opening we had reduced that net short position almost entirely. Would that we had had the temerity and the foresight to have reversed our derivatives position entirely, but we are neither that insightful nor that heroic.

 

Today, almost certainly we’ll be covering in a bit more of our derivatives position and at the same time we’ll be buying more of our single “tanker” stock to take our “net” position to one that is modestly, marginally net long. We’ve no choice. The market has spoken and it has  spoken loudly.

Thursday - "flat and nervous":

We enter today effectively net market neutral, holding the same position we have held wherein we are long of the same “tanker” stock and long of a small position in coal shares while “short” of derivatives and at this point we see no reason to believe that we shall be changing that position today; however, the randomness of the market’s movements makes even that statement seem disingenuous. We are indeed “Flat and nervous,” and that seem quite reasonable and rational under the circumstances.

Which brings us to today, and the most recent now daily flip-flop by the world renowned contrarian indicator, when somewhat to our surprise, Gartman did not revert back to being bullish, which would be great news for bears, but instead Gartman decided to almost assure that stocks close the week green.

To wit:

From a purely technical circumstance we are still quite worried about the markets in general terms, but we are very worried about the markets here in the US in specific, catholic terms because the current consolidation has traced out what in the text-book of technical analysis, Edward’s & McGee’s Technical Analysis of Stock Market Trends is a nearly classic “pennant” formation that almost always resolves itself in the direction that prevailed before the consolidation took place. In this instance, since the moved preceding the “pennant” was down, the next move of consequence shall also likely be lower. If the consolidation is indeed reconciled to the downside, the target becomes 1725-1750, or just a bit more than 200 S&P points to the downside.

 

* * *

 

NEW RECOMMENDATION: we wish to sell the S&P futures short this morning, fearing that a major top hss developed and that the recent consolidation in the stock market is precisely that: a consolidation before the next leg downward.

 

We’ll sell the S&P future short and will buy the December T-note at the same time, with the S&P trading 1933.00 as we write and with the Dec T-note future trading 127 ¼. We’ll risk no more than 1.5% on either position and we look for the consolidation in the S&P to resolve itself sharply lower as discussed at length above.

Not sure what being worried in "catholic terms" means aside from the daily comedic trolling of clients for what may be the most accurate (if completely in inverse terms) newsletter in history. Bears (and Treasury bulls): this has been your public service announcement warning.

 

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Fri, 09/11/2015 - 08:58 | 6535286 Amateur Society
Amateur Society's picture

Thanks Dennis, Dow 20,000 here we come!

Unless it's time for the broken clock...

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:04 | 6535321 bania
bania's picture

"catholic terms"? I was worried when he was long in dong terms, now this!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:08 | 6535340 bania
bania's picture

or even worse, long dong in catholic terms. Yikes!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:11 | 6535354 Secret Treaties
Secret Treaties's picture

How does this villiage idiot get any air time?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:12 | 6535361 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

So panic buying into the close then? 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:20 | 6535378 Looney
Looney's picture

“Gartman” is so offensive! Dennis should change his last name to Gartperson. ;-)

Looney

P.S. Somebody, please, give this looser a big shiny trophy just for his participation. ;-)

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:24 | 6535414 Pairadimes
Pairadimes's picture

This clown gyrates more than Miley Cyrus. He is singlehandedly responsible for putting the V in VIX. I cannot believe there is anybody that takes him seriously anymore.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:33 | 6535463 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

DAMN IT..., now I need to buy?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:25 | 6535747 Crisismode
Crisismode's picture

 

 

Isn't this cartoon buffoon a lead character in South Park?

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 11:58 | 6536254 Sages wife
Sages wife's picture

Conundrum.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:30 | 6535448 Hype Alert
Hype Alert's picture

Ah come on, he said "almost always".  ;)

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 15:06 | 6537152 Shleprock
Shleprock's picture

True to form, Green baby Green!!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:20 | 6535395 SuperRay
SuperRay's picture

Even this self-satisfied Krugman's-perverted-cousin can't be perfect in his market calls - i'm taking the other side of that bet. S&P is down 15 points by the end of the day.  Who's brave enough to take a chance that this empty SOS can't always contra-call the market?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:43 | 6536480 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

Gartman will get stopped out on Sunday night or Monday.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:53 | 6535557 Keltner Channel Surf
Keltner Channel Surf's picture

Don't be so harsh, he's at the forefront of the move toward driver-less navigation

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 11:03 | 6535976 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

Village idiots get air time (or get elected president) because someone wants it for them. Maybe this clown is there to send out coded signals. Catholic terms??? The market breaks when the pope talks to the UN, Congress and the Kenyan guy in two weeks???? Wish I had my secret decoder ring but it went down with my gold in that boating incident. My crystal ball suggests a collapse at about the 23rd to 25th so the Catholic clue may be a good one.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:14 | 6535365 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

It means call the priest to administer last rites

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:10 | 6535346 TahoeBilly2012
TahoeBilly2012's picture

"catholic terms"...rythym method, hopefully "pulls out" in time...

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:40 | 6535490 negative rates
negative rates's picture

It's just simpler to use protection so she can concentrate real hard.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:36 | 6535809 Paveway IV
Paveway IV's picture

If he said he was worried 'in muslim terms' he would be put on a watch list and recruited by the FBI for their next false flag.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 23:42 | 6538716 SixIsNinE
SixIsNinE's picture

extra extra, read all about it !  Yale has accepted a large donation from a wealthy ME benefactor in order to establish a center studying Islamic Law. Done deal.  Maybe we better have GW do us a Sharia Law for Dummies post ....

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:14 | 6535367 XAU XAG
XAU XAG's picture

Fartman

 

Fart and give us a clue!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:15 | 6535371 Plunge Protection
Plunge Protection's picture

The real jokes on the people buying his newsletter. At this point its probably just commic relief for people.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:15 | 6535372 Plunge Protection
Plunge Protection's picture

The real jokes on the people buying his newsletter. At this point its probably just commic relief for people.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:59 | 6535584 PlayMoney
PlayMoney's picture

damn, there goes my inverse funds

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 08:59 | 6535288 This is it
This is it's picture

BUYYYYYYYY

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 08:59 | 6535290 MFL8240
MFL8240's picture

Clown man!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:00 | 6535297 XAU XAG
XAU XAG's picture

Not nice on the Clowns

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:00 | 6535295 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

My trading strategy for the day is now locked in.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:40 | 6535494 NoVa
NoVa's picture

I've said it before - A broken clock is right twice a day.

 

NoVa

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:02 | 6535303 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Well damn...  just when my puts were paying off too, fuck this clown.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:02 | 6535306 Laughinggrizzley
Laughinggrizzley's picture

Here we go to 2020, can't you just STFU!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:02 | 6535307 Spungo
Spungo's picture

Very worried and having sex with children. Got it.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:02 | 6535308 The Axe
The Axe's picture

I don't change my socks this much. I am confused with all of his opposite calls, which call I should trade against. 

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:05 | 6535326 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

The most recent one.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:08 | 6535337 VinceFostersGhost
VinceFostersGhost's picture

 

 

If you can stay current.......which is quite a commitment.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:14 | 6535366 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

To be honest, I'm so confused by this guy that I don't know what his most recent call is.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:02 | 6535310 monopoly
monopoly's picture

This man is truly a treasure to day traders. I don't day trade but enjoy his modestly long and marginally short positions.....On a daily basis. lol.

 Does anyone actually give this guy money?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:30 | 6535768 Crisismode
Crisismode's picture

 

 

"A fool and his sheckels are soon parted."

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:03 | 6535311 Bro of the Sorr...
Bro of the Sorrowful Figure's picture

im worried about the market in ambiguous, transgender caitlyn terms. could this consolidation be nothing more than a bear vagina constructed from an inside out surgically implemented bull scrotum?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:04 | 6535316 Deadratsplat
Deadratsplat's picture

Wow! I worry in Lutheran terms, maybe Gartman I could go bowling and discuss a list of things to nail to a door!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:09 | 6535343 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

++1000

LMFAO!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:04 | 6535320 Chippewa Partners
Chippewa Partners's picture

If his position sizing/risk discipline was followed with GARTMANLIKE precision his retirment account was zeroed out a long time ago.   Bullshit artist extraordinaire!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:35 | 6535324 BlueStreet
BlueStreet's picture

Oh, FUDG(e). Flip again Denny, best 2 out of 3.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:06 | 6535329 tedstr
tedstr's picture

I think he forgot the occasional best trading strategy: Do nothing

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:09 | 6535345 VinceFostersGhost
VinceFostersGhost's picture

 

 

Sit on your hands......over time.....just sayin.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:06 | 6535330 john_connor
john_connor's picture

I could see a short squeeze to maybe SnP 1990 or something. Then Gartman will flip flop again and then the market will crash.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:06 | 6535331 doggis
doggis's picture

OK - GARTMAN IS DUE FOR A "RIGHT" CALL - SO THE PROBABILITIES AT THIS POINT IS LEANING TOWARDS A "CORRECT" CALL......

TRADE ACCORDINGLY

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:11 | 6535350 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Doesn't matter how many times you flip a coin, your odds of it landing on heads or tales the next flip never changes.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:07 | 6535333 smoke em if you...
smoke em if you got em's picture

I think one of his ancestors must have been a revolving door.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:10 | 6535348 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Or a traffic light

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:09 | 6535334 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Oh, please.... make it stop. He's gone beyond full retard. He's gone potato......, bearded potato that is.

 

https://youtu.be/oAKG-kbKeIo

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 11:09 | 6536009 r3ct1f13r
r3ct1f13r's picture

Soooo he could power GLADOS?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:09 | 6535341 jellen
jellen's picture

sep 11th the only day Gartman is right. Any takers?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:42 | 6535502 NoVa
NoVa's picture

maybe

Nah - he got a lucky guess.  Like a blind squirrel finding an acorn.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:10 | 6535352 katchum
katchum's picture

Gartman may be the reason for the surge in stock volatility.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:12 | 6535357 jvetter713
jvetter713's picture

Can you please be fucking right this time for once in your life!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:12 | 6535360 hibou-Owl
hibou-Owl's picture

I think he's right this time, But fuck me he's changing direction Faster than a ping pong ball in a Bangkok Bar

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:13 | 6535362 JJdog
JJdog's picture

I long S&P in clown terms, a short s&p in retard terms, then we a flat & clueless about the cheese market. Over all we are marginally bet long & short on my piggy bank.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:13 | 6535363 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

No comment needed on Gartman. See below.

Duncan Lifesaver Yo-Yo Commercial - YouTube

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:17 | 6535381 FPearl602
FPearl602's picture

Sorry lads, I think DG is spot on and agree with his thesis. The only way Wall St. gets what it wants (more QE) is to crash the stock market.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:22 | 6535401 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

The world is on fire unless the Federal Reserve begins NIRP. Who would of thought seeing this coming?

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:25 | 6535409 jellen
jellen's picture

-1 because you think he's spot on, +1 cause the markets gonna crash.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:22 | 6535405 q99x2
q99x2's picture

BTFD

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:22 | 6535407 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

Short in Hail Mary terms.

 

 

I just got used to Yen terms!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:27 | 6535415 Keltner Channel Surf
Keltner Channel Surf's picture

Must be dangerous driving in Suffolk, VA, w/ Gartman & his staff keeping their windshields covered, using only the rear-view mirror to navigate.  (Pre-open Index futures near overnight lows only adds to the long setup -- unless algos are planning a counter-counter-Gartman fake-out ...)

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:57 | 6535431 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

Gartman is talking about December positioning which in this "Market" and with his flip flopping is about as nonsensical as you can get.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:30 | 6535434 gmak
gmak's picture

There's a roll of duct tape in this guy's future.  Who talks their book every second day?  How can this clown even be in business anymore?

 

/rolls eyes.

 

I'm starting to think that Gartman is a meat puppet for Algos and that if the camera would pan back we would see a long robotic arm up his @ss and no legs.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:31 | 6535450 Bob Bercy
Bob Bercy's picture

"Catholic" means you can get it horribly wrong and still be forgiven. Ego te absolvo in nomine Cramer, Faber et CNBC...

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 11:15 | 6536031 ASACJon
ASACJon's picture

I would up vote twice if I could. I usually go to the Tridentine Mass and have heard those words a plenty. Minus the Cramer, Faber, et CNBC of course.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:17 | 6536360 coast
coast's picture

jon:  are you speaking of hypothicating up votes?  you can only do that with houses and gold... lol

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 14:48 | 6537061 ASACJon
ASACJon's picture

One can dream of a future where hypothication is no longer contained by the Eurocentric, racist, gender-queer phobic shackles that still rule.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:32 | 6535454 AntiFabian
AntiFabian's picture
14 years since 9/11, yet financially as a nation we're actually worse. Lowest labor force participation rate in our history, greatest national debt (exponential increase in six years), and more coming soon thanks to the Dem and Republican collusion keep us on the road to bankruptcy with yet another further debt limit increase.  Why, so they can vote themselves money with gov’t spending and inside trading on the fruits of their cronyism.  After all, that is what the Iran deal is all about.  Make no mistake, both party's leadership want it just as bad as this president.  Why, so they can get their cut of the ill-gotten trade deals that will come as a result of the 150,000,000,000 in Iranian blood money that will be allowed to be spent by Iran.  Spent on what you might ask, I am sure it won’t be to buy any more IEDs to kill and maim US soldiers and innocent Iraqis, no they did enough of that.  Will it be to buy thousands more rockets to sneak into Gaza to fire into Israel, no they are past all that and have moved onto bigger and better things thanks to Obama the dutiful son of Islam and his lackeys on both sides of the isle. 
Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:37 | 6535480 Phoenix901210
Phoenix901210's picture

While I don't want to unfairly characterise anyone. I have a friend of a friend who knows a great deal about a lot of very dark stuff and people. He has noticed certain code words the elite use for each other i.e. I'm going along with this but I'm don't really mean it (I.e. in some sort of sanction). I have noticed these code words independently myself after I have been told them.

This site has recorded how 666 is showing up quite deliberately at certain points. If he is 'very worried in Catholic terms'. You can be DAMN sure it's some sort of complex manouever and I suspect, some very heavy rigging going on!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:49 | 6535501 ConManipulation
ConManipulation's picture

Catholic means world wide.  I'm a bit surprised that no one else knows this...then again, I only know it because of 17 years of Catholic schooling.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:53 | 6535550 ProtectiveFather
ProtectiveFather's picture

Exactly. Broad, universal, encompassing all. It's an apt choice of words.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:48 | 6535504 ConManipulation
ConManipulation's picture

Double tap

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 09:51 | 6535541 Temerity Trader
Temerity Trader's picture

Does he exist, or is he just a metaphor for the millions of traders who actually know nothing at all? Even the big banker boys who have the firepower to manipulate the markets, cannot predict the future and cannot keep complete control either.

Mr. Market is all about lemming psychology, nothing more…fear and greed. Convince the fools there is no other game in town thanks to the Fed, and that they will all become rich if they just stay the course.  Everyone from 18 to 88 is in the markets now, and it has to break. But it will not move in one direction all the time and will frustrate those “geniuses” who think they can predict the future. A fool’s errand, nothing more.

Earnings are falling and cheap Fed buyback $$ may end. But, the Wall Street propaganda machine will run in overdrive to try to prevent panic selling. The Fed will assist with statements on how confident they are about the awesome “recovery” they engineered. Can they keep the illusion going as they grow debt to hide the true rot? We shall see...

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:04 | 6535614 Evan Wilson
Evan Wilson's picture

I thought Gartman was part of the PPT?

What's going on? Its Friday, time for the market to be put up on a gain for the week and the DOW is off 66 points at the moment.

Where is the PPT and what the hell are they doing?

They need to get to work and get this market up.

There is a lot of work for the PPT to do to get to 19,000 before New Year's Eve!

 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:33 | 6535800 vegas
vegas's picture

They have a "retirement" fund? [Good luck with that.] Look for that stop on the eminis at the 1950 area to get taken out either before or on next Wednesday. Some days, this shit is too easy.

 

www.traderzoo.mobi

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 10:52 | 6535897 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

I have a Gartman on my roof that tells me where the wind blows.

Do you really need a Gartman?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 11:05 | 6535987 Soul Glow
Soul Glow's picture

Go long muppets!  Gartman is never right.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:02 | 6536269 Mat Cauthon
Mat Cauthon's picture

In religious terms, Catholic means 'Universal'...

But I suspect in financial terms it means the acquisition of more land and assets to increase the Papal States like in the Middle Ages... or here in the 21st century, Stolper/Gartman your recommendations to bet against the peasants and leave them begging for indulgences.

 

 

Dovie'andi se tovya sagain (It's time to toss the dice)

The Daily Economist 

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:07 | 6536301 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

Gartman!!!!!!!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:11 | 6536316 Well Hungarian
Well Hungarian's picture

Why do I think of the "art" created by a monkey smearing his feces on canvas every time this idiot opens his mouth?

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:29 | 6536390 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

If you sold S&P futures in dollar terms it is your fault the man said Hail Mary (Catholic) terms!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:29 | 6536410 HonestlyExpress...
HonestlyExpressingYourself's picture

Funny, but the idea someone can be a consistently contrarian indicator is as foolish as that someone can be consistently right.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:54 | 6536427 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

Uhh, do you follow this man?

 

Search this web site for "Gartman".

 

Maybe he is not always wrong, but Damn!

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:33 | 6536430 arbwhore
arbwhore's picture

... and yet here we are with a market that is up 0.5% since his short call. I agree that odds he is wrong all the time are very long but he just keeps doing it.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:34 | 6536436 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

this shit is so insane at this point.

 

the moment he says something  the ''market'' does the opposite. 5 for 5, in fucking sane.

 

i wish gartman would continue to be long, we would have the biggest crash we have seen.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:48 | 6536498 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

That is 4 for 4 this week and this is not his first week.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:56 | 6536532 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

yup my bad, the ''market'' was closed monday, so its 4-4 as u said.

 

its truly amazing.

 

he can say there will be no nuclear war today and there will be a nuclear weapon launched the same day.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 12:57 | 6536540 offwirenews
offwirenews's picture

haha look at the markets.

 

You've just been Gartmaned

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 13:23 | 6536654 Clowns on Acid
Clowns on Acid's picture

0 for 4 ... Gartman going for the dirty Sanchez award.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 14:45 | 6537047 ASACJon
ASACJon's picture

We are setting up for a classic pennant pattern.  Obviously, given the CBs and their minor hobby of market manipulation, that may mean less than it once did.

In fairness to DG, his reasoning is not wrong.  Indeed, he has an interesting record, so as a shorter, I'm a little nervous.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 18:05 | 6537239 brada1013567
brada1013567's picture

There is great peril in ignoring the Gartman indicator.

 

His "reasoning" might as well be set by a coin flip.

 

I am a trader.

Fri, 09/11/2015 - 15:27 | 6537249 Shpedly
Shpedly's picture

In "Catholic terms"? I'm assuming that means "of Biblical proportions".

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