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Illinois To Delay Pension Payments Amid Budget Woes: "For All Intents And Purposes, We Are Out Of Money Now"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

By now, Illinois' budget problems are no secret.

Back in May, after the State Supreme Court struck down a pension reform bid, Moody's move to downgrade the city of Chicago thrust the state's financial woes into the national spotlight. 

Since then, the situation hasn't gotten any better and despite hiring an "all star" budget guru (for $30,000 a month no less), Bruce Rauner was unable to pass a budget in a timely fashion leading directly to all types of absurdities including everything from the possibility of shortened school years to lottery winners being paid in IOUs.

Now, as Bloomberg reports, pension payments are set to be delayed. Bond payments, apparently, will still be made.

Illinois will delay pension payments as a prolonged budget impasse causes a cash shortage, Comptroller Leslie Geissler Munger said.

 

The spending standoff between Republican Governor Bruce Rauner and Democratic legislative leaders has extended into its fourth month with no signs of ending. Munger said her office will postpone a $560 million retirement-fund payment next month, and may make the December contribution late.

 

“This decision is choosing the least of a number of bad options,” Munger told reporters in Chicago on Wednesday. “For all intents and purposes, we are out of money now.”

 

Munger said the pension systems will be paid in full by the end of the fiscal year in June. The state still is making bond payments, she said.

 

“We prioritize the bond payments above everything else,” Munger told reporters.

And from Reuters:

Illinois Comptroller Leslie Munger said on Wednesday a $560 million November pension payment will be delayed due to a cash crunch stemming from the state's budget impasse.

 

Despite the delay, state pension funds will be paid in full by the end of fiscal 2016, Munger said at a news conference in Chicago.

Here's some color (again via Reuters) from Tuesday's preview:

Oct 13 Illinois' budget impasse has reached a point where full and timely payments for big ticket items such as pensions could be in jeopardy, the state comptroller's office indicated on Tuesday.

 

Comptroller Leslie Munger set a Wednesday press conference "to discuss the significant cash flow constraints the continuing budget impasse is placing on state finances and the challenges of making timely state payments in the months ahead," according to an advisory from her office.

 

The battle between Republican Governor Bruce Rauner and Democrats who control the legislature has left Illinois without a budget for the fiscal year that began July 1. However, the state is required, even without a budget, to put aside money each month for pensions and debt service on bonds.

One wonders what these means for Chicago's bankrupt school system, which, as we reported early last month, was depending upon nearly a half billion in funding from Springfield to plug a gaping budget hole. Further, this would seem to suggest that anyone who wins more than a few thousand in the Illinois lottery can go ahead and figure on getting a pieces of paper with Bruce Rauner's picture rather than Ben Franklin's for the foreseeable future. 

We also encourage readers to review this piece by Reuters in full as it contains several of the most egregious examples of government waste and inefficiency you'll ever come across  and goes on to say that reform simply isn't an option, as the Illinois legislature is filled with lawmakers who have at one time or another themselves benefited from the state's sprawling local bureaucracies. Reuters also says it has identified nearly a dozen instances where husbands employ wives, mothers employ daughters, and fathers hire sons," suggesting nepotism weighs heavily on the already elephantine system. 

Bear in mind that this is the same state whose court system refuses to allow efforts at pension reform to move forward, and while all of this may seem like a recipe for default disaster, just remember, PIMCO sees a lot of "long-term value" in Chicago's debt.

Finally, a look at just how underfunded Illinois' pension system truly is:

 

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Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:50 | 6667899 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

shoe meet drop.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:52 | 6667914 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Derr.. Unfunded liabilities?  Whats that?  Surely its not a balance sheet item... Right?  Something we can hide in the notes, or possibly off-balance sheet?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:02 | 6667971 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture

Surely the toll roads will pay for it, I mean higher taxes, I mean more government, sorry I mean more taxes...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:06 | 6667979 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

"You'll wear leather clothes that will last you the rest of your life. You'll climb the wrist-thick kudzu vines that wrap the Sears Willis Blackstone Tower. And when you look down, you'll see tiny figures pounding corn, laying strips of venison on the empty car pool lane of some abandoned superhighway." 

 

- Tyler Durden

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:10 | 6667999 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

Then you'll see the cops come over and take it all away from them... it's still their car pool lane after all.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:13 | 6668024 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

I wonder how many people in Illinois kept up with the news out of Greece the last few years and see the parallels?  Scratch that.  I wonder how many Illinois PENSIONERS kept up with the news out of Greece the last few years and see the parallels?

They will lie to you right to the end.  They will tell you you're being paid when you're not.  They will promise full payment in the future, but it won't come.  And when you finally pick up your pichfork and head for the government offices downtown, you will find them empty.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:16 | 6668050 LowerSlowerDela...
LowerSlowerDelaware_LSD's picture

This is obviously whey we MUST vote for more of these progressive types.

Such a good job of promising the world then not delivering.  But it's the thought that counts in progressive land.

"FREE college for everyone!!!" - Sanders/Clinton. Morons.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:19 | 6668071 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

Is it a prerequisite to be a lesbian to enroll in Lesbian Studies 101?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:27 | 6668130 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

Welcome to the First Fifth Ninth Bank of Federal Reservations - "We Finance Anything"

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:33 | 6668175 Publicus
Publicus's picture

Just print the money out of thin air, it's as simple as that. Modify a few digits in the computer files.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:38 | 6668205 MANvsMACHINE
MANvsMACHINE's picture
"For All Intents And Purposes, We Are Out Of Money Now"

should be...

"We Are Out Of Money Now"

or even better...

"We Have Been Out Of Money For Many Years"
Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:03 | 6668369 clooney_art
clooney_art's picture

Nice. That's what I expect at the end for all government employees.

They will be Greeced.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:15 | 6668443 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

First they came for the Illinois lottery winners and I said nothing because I wasnt a lottery winner.  

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:58 | 6668628 mkkby
mkkby's picture

Liberals and progressives are so stupid, I hope they get it right up the ass. 

Like it ever made sense that you can pay a heavily bloated staff, while also paying up to twice as many not to work with their golden pensions.  If anybody really gave a shit, 90% of gov workers could be laid off BECAUSE THEY DO NOTHING.  The rest could happily be paid $15/hour, since after all this is a recession.

I'd love to see the ILL budget.  I'll bet 75% goes to nigger care and welfare for perfectly able-bodied losers.  Cut off all free shit to anyone not honestly disabled to the point of being unable to work AT ALL.  Even a blind person could be answering phones.  A person in a wheel chair can do computer work.  This would give them a lot more pride and purpose than sitting around watching soaps all day.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:20 | 6668713 Money Counterfeiter
Money Counterfeiter's picture

Liberals are lazy sociopaths who will say anything and do anything to get out of working for a living. 

 

Gold is the only known cure for that bullshit.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:50 | 6668807 I MISS KUDLOW
I MISS KUDLOW's picture

They can get away with it as long as they kepp Cubs playing,,not that it matter when they won their series the other day half the fans were looking down at their phones and not watching the game

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:29 | 6668937 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

Judges in Illinois have been handing out court orders to keep state funding going. I kid you not. It's absurd.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:10 | 6669111 Keyser
Keyser's picture

Illinois should keep electing Luis Guitierrez, that bastion of socialist values whose mission is to give all american assets to illegal aliens... That should work out really well... 

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 21:11 | 6669447 the kings whore
the kings whore's picture

I feel sorry for Illinois.  But I'm a broke dead dick, too.  I can't even afford soup.  Boo-hoo.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:58 | 6669690 Fahque Imuhnutjahb
Fahque Imuhnutjahb's picture

 

 

There is a way out of this.  The pension administrator simply needs to invest in some select tranches of triple-A rated

Mortgage Backed Securities.  By doing this, high yield gains with compounding interest will right this ship in short order.

I can't believe someone's not considered this sooner!!  The only risk I see is if cock sucking: investment bankers,

mortgage bundlers, rating agencies, regulatory agencies, and Abacus constructing, thieving, muppet sodomizing,

short sellers were to collude to engineer an orchestrated take down of the pension plans; thus leaving retirees holding their

dicks in one hand and the bag in the other.  But, that's fat tail, six sigma, black swan territory---so we're all good.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:10 | 6669717 Fahque Imuhnutjahb
Fahque Imuhnutjahb's picture

 

 

P.S.-----  In the off chance the above scenario were to, (God Forbid!) unfold, don't worry--because we have some patriots with

the courage to act, and take tax dollars from the aggrieved pensioners and the rest of the 'Murkan citizenry, and use it--not to

make the pension plans and other raped muppets whole--but rather, to give to the list of above cock suckers to buy up

the distressed assets at firesale prices to resell at a profit to the folks that will pick up the tab for decades to come.  So feel

confident knowing that there is a Plan B--(code for buttfuck) to keep the economy on track.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:59 | 6668833 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

Can federal pension defaults be far behind?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:45 | 6669797 Vincent.Vega
Vincent.Vega's picture

Once FED stops functioning as a mechanism of colonial taxation.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 08:08 | 6670266 PT
PT's picture

I's got a pension plan.  I's gonna become a bankster!  Those guys always get money even when they're flat-broke up to their eyeballs in debt, incompetent, criminal ... they always get bailed out!  Don't invest in super.  Buy yourself a job in a TBTF bank!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:08 | 6668865 COSMOS
COSMOS's picture

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2931325/Super-rich-buying-proper...

No Debt of course the offices will be empty, but the bolthole mansions in New Zealand will be full and the wine cellars fully stocked.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:23 | 6668723 Collapsed
Collapsed's picture

mkkby aka Mr. Simpleton,

Please let more educated folks debate the nuances of economics.  In all honesty, you are probably as big of a loser as those you call losers.  Look in the mirror....be honest with yourself.  You most likely are poorly educated, live in a small rural town and have never been outside your city limits.  

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:02 | 6668848 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

"Educated" and "Intelligent" are not synonymous.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:36 | 6669160 new game
new game's picture

so who appointed you as god? mirrors, so you can take a look...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:33 | 6669147 r00t61
r00t61's picture

Yes, I am all in favor of "more edumacated folks" like Paul "I am a bearded potato" Krugman and Alan "Mr. Magoo" Greenspan debating the "nuances" of eCONomics.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:01 | 6669581 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

AHH, The 'nuances of eCONomics' line. Hahvahd, OR Yale version?

1) If your outgo exceeds your income, your upkeep will be your downfall.

2) Borrowing at interest is usury.

3) An honest day's labor for an honest day's wages.

The State of Illinois (incorporated) is corrupt from top to bottom, and has wasted, spent, skimmed, sweetheart-dealed, and FUCKED the people that live therein. Promising niggardly worthless people more and more 'welfare', thay have skimmed the top. Appointing their insider sweetheart-dealers to impliment the 'benefits', they have ripped off the taxpaying people. In order to pay ever-higher interest rates on loans against future tax revenues, they have driven the productive businesses and people out of the State.

NOW, the shit is hitting the fan, and a bitch like you has the answer: People who are pointing this OBVIOUS shit out are 'unedumacated' (unlike YOURSELF).

What part of 'Fuck you, you edumacated fucking ass-kissing moron' do you NOT understand here?

If you want to see Chicago burn FOR REAL, watch when the State fails to pay out their WELFARE BENEFITS.

HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAY! It's CHOOM-BOI MOUSE, he's on the WAY!

Bitch like YOU will probably vote for that doddering old Socialist 'useless eater' Sanders. I've lived across the globe, am fairly-well educated, and I don't recognize the fiction of corporate 'City limits'. Blue pills are uppers, and red pills are downers. Niggers call each other 'brother' and 'sister' because they don't know who their daddy is.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 08:53 | 6670449 sunnyside
sunnyside's picture

Damn nice rant.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:55 | 6670005 D Nyle
D Nyle's picture

Ma degree in Ebonic's is all I knneed

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:43 | 6668773 Countrybunkererd
Countrybunkererd's picture

They should be Greeced.  Where are the pensions for everyone else?  I am self employed and get ZERO pension but have had to pay for their pensions by taxation or forced liquidation.  I don't care what was promised, your ponzi blew up in your face.  These same pensioners can care less about the private sectors retirement prospects, why should I or anyone else have to pay AGAIN to cover their waste and corruption (Chitcago's low level of corruption as it is) to ensure they got larger and larger pensions for themselves.

Join the rest of America that has lost their retirement, need a second and third job to cover healthcare, can't buy a home, and so on and so on.  I don't want you to go hungry, but having to turn your heat down to 63 degrees, worry about electricity bills now that Odumb@$$ killed coal, is NECESSARY for you to see what the rest of America does...BUDGET.  You should not feel sorry for them, they are angry that they were robbed, everyone else, as a private sector member has been getting robbed for decades.  Join the club.  As for your pensions, well that is up in smoke now, so get over it and be the first to apply for a X-mart greeter, since they are cutting back now, competition is at an all time high.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:40 | 6668980 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

Sad story on the news the other day. A retired fireman burned to death on his riding lawn mower.

And then I thought...fireman...has a riding lawn mower...must be a big ass yard, heck of a ...PENSION!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 21:58 | 6669575 LowerSlowerDela...
LowerSlowerDelaware_LSD's picture

"...retired fireman burned to death on his riding lawn mower."

How the eff did Darwin not get this one while he was fighting real fires all of those years?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:17 | 6669614 MontgomeryScott
MontgomeryScott's picture

He was a fireman, not a mechanic!

Probably tried to put out a gas fire with a water hose.

O.K. if he was in a car with all the windows rolled up, and the thing rolled over and crushed down so that none of the doors could be opened, and it caught fire/exploded, I'd understand this. BUT: A RIDING LAWN MOWER?

'I smell gas. Oh, well, probably nothing to worry about. I'll look at it after I get mowing my palatial mansion grounds...'

PERHAPS he was 'Mr. Safety', and was wearing a seat belt on his Toro (and the damned buckle jammed when it caught).

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:48 | 6668804 Hopeless for Change
Hopeless for Change's picture

Your solution makes perfect sense, and therefore will be ignored

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:54 | 6669029 TheObsoleteMan
TheObsoleteMan's picture

Most liberals and progressives DO take it in the ass, and they LOVE IT.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:43 | 6669998 EBT excepted
EBT excepted's picture

ya cuz dey way mo' fun...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:12 | 6669088 FringeImaginigs
FringeImaginigs's picture

Don't like government, don't like taxes, don't like welfare and all that craap. Have I got a place for you!  Somalia, Eritrea, Kenya, Syria, Nigeria.  But don't forgoet to bring a truck load of ammo, cause the other locals might just take a liking to your wife, and there isn't any public police to help you.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:19 | 6669110 lasvegaspersona
lasvegaspersona's picture

fringel

you are wacky

we are months away from that...let us enjoy the last few weeks with our illusions and delusions OK?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:40 | 6669173 new game
new game's picture

why leave the country? patience. as far as the wife goes, like she said "id take a bullet for you", tink bout dat, you fucking gunbanner, looser...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:16 | 6669277 Government need...
Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

What if I dont like welfare or the crime that comes with living next to niggers?

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:41 | 6669994 EBT excepted
EBT excepted's picture

ain' no damn crime to be on d'EBT bruthah...widout d'wefare, da 'conomee ca go bad...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:28 | 6669762 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

Seems MediaMaters and MoveOn have unleashed the trolls. Thin skinned and obvious, they type among us offering nothing. 

 

FORWARD BERNIE'S SOVIET!

FREE HONEYMOONS!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:34 | 6669155 r00t61
r00t61's picture

Since you like government so much, go move to North Korea.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:31 | 6669983 sun tzu
sun tzu's picture

Yes because the only two forms of government are Somalia's or a corrupt police state run by and for Wall St bankers. Go fuck your mother up the ass again

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:27 | 6669134 HyperinflatmyNutts
HyperinflatmyNutts's picture

What about the Corporate welfare? How about the the 100's of billions we have given Israel?? 

http://www.csmonitor.com/2002/1209/p16s01-wmgn.html

How about the money the MIC steals every year with their Bullshit boogieman war (the terrorist r coming)

What about the Billions on the Bullshit war on drugs and the bloated DEA budget? 

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:38 | 6669992 EBT excepted
EBT excepted's picture

nigrows needs da care too bruthah...

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:31 | 6669927 Ace006
Ace006's picture

That's funny.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:21 | 6668479 NoDecaf
NoDecaf's picture

Aaaand it's gone!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:40 | 6668536 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

By far my favorite ZH article...(which needs to be updated -- hint, hint Tyler ?  )

The Ten US Cities With Less Than Ten Days Of Cash On Hand

http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-10-29/ten-us-cities-less-ten-days-cas...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:00 | 6668642 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

I'm sure the 'progressives' will blame the greedy Capitalists.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:49 | 6668806 Countrybunkererd
Countrybunkererd's picture

Of course!  They just fought off higher taxes or we could have paid the bills, those evil business owners, they are the source of all your ills.  I mean a liberal getting paid 200k for a speech is perfectly acceptable, but commerce and services that is evil, unless of course it is owned by a liberal.

Running guns into the middle east is fine, carrying one at home is not.  It is what they want, they are the "jeanyousus" that know all.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:53 | 6668817 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

The 'progressive' politicians and bureaucrats ARE CHOSING TO PAY THE GREEDY CAPTIALISTS ( & THEMSELVES ) -& not the Pensioners.

WHO IS GREEDY & WHO IS WILLING TO SHARE THE WEALTH &/OR PAIN?

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:00 | 6668645 agstacks
agstacks's picture

"Nice. That's what I expect at the end for all government employees.

They will be Greeced."

 

They'll ask you to do more "fair sharing" first (do you want Granny to have to rummage through a trash bin?! What kind of heartless person are you?!)

If you don't agree we'll have no choice but to layoff all the police and firemen. Sorry, you left us no choice..

\s  

 

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:35 | 6669934 Ace006
Ace006's picture

The MLK museum must remain open at all costs.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:25 | 6669857 undertow1141
undertow1141's picture

From the unfunded liabilities, I'd say they were broke about a trillion FRNs ago. Give or take a few billion.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:38 | 6669936 Ace006
Ace006's picture

India first conceived of the zero. We are the first to conceive of the non number.

Please be silent now about unfunded liabilities.

 

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 12:58 | 6671588 undertow1141
undertow1141's picture

They also gangrape women in the street, whats your point douche.

Sun, 10/25/2015 - 13:57 | 6709258 Ace006
Ace006's picture

It was not an unfriendly comment, friend.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:41 | 6668546 kiwigal
kiwigal's picture

What would that qualify you for!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:02 | 6669585 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

Government job studying lesbians on the internet...

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:40 | 6669941 Ace006
Ace006's picture

A job for the ages.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:10 | 6669604 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

of course not, i've been taking internet classes for years.  i almost have a phd

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:05 | 6668857 booboo
booboo's picture

The residents of Illinois are some of the dumbest mother fuckers on the planet, I was born and raised there and left when I was 20 because it is a union hell hole. If you were to ask them about three issues, guns, gays and taxes their answers would sound like a John Bircher but then they all vote straight ticket democrat. They are like the Stepford Wives.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:20 | 6668907 lunaticfringe
lunaticfringe's picture

Can you imagine what happens if the PPT and the FED surrender? The market is allowed to actually go down? Fuck this is gonna be some good entertainment.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:12 | 6669265 espirit
espirit's picture

Yeah... but where can we get popcorn that you can cook over an open fire?

I wouldn't bet the microwave ovens will be working.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:44 | 6669945 Ace006
Ace006's picture

Who needs the Shopping Channel any more?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:40 | 6668981 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

"Night Of the Almost Dead-Revenge of the Pensioners".

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:13 | 6668040 VWAndy
VWAndy's picture

Dam straight. Cuz ya know they are the good guys and know whats best.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:22 | 6668478 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

If you think you have an Illinois Pension:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymPpIzaanhY

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:16 | 6669913 ElectroGravitic
ElectroGravitic's picture

It is hard for States to raise money when no one buys their debt:

https://s3.amazonaws.com/khudes/scan0013.pdf

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:09 | 6668010 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

"But I was promised!"

"You fucked up.  You trusted us."

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:10 | 6668017 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

pitch meet fork.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:07 | 6668851 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

The only way the bullshit stops is if Gramma and Gramps get the fuck up and light the fuze.

NO functioning economy, monetary system, and rule of law benefitting their progeny and they will get NOTHING!

IF the economy is fucked and the kids don't make decent livings they can't pay for crazy promises their grandparents and parents made to each other and themselves..

 

Now, Elders: it is time -to choose.

What are YOU gonna do?

Are YOU gonna put the country back on track?

Are YOU gonna restore limited government and sound money and the rule of law?

Are YOU gonna close down the failed and greedy bureaucracies?

Are YOU gonna bring the jobs home and stop the flow of illegals that take the jobs your progeny deserve?

Are YOU gonna end the bullshit foreign hand-outs and endless wars and shitty sell out trade deals?

Are YOU gonna personally stop wasting money you don't have on dumb shit you don't need?

Well: it's either ALL of that -OR- YOU fucking get nothing.

 

IT IS YOUR CHOICE.

 

...CHOOSE.

 

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:22 | 6668914 lunaticfringe
lunaticfringe's picture

Lighten up Francis. Some of us got a plan B.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:11 | 6669083 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

MY Plan A is : FUCK THEM.

I am NOT paying them.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:51 | 6669366 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

don't call me francis or i'll kill ya.   you just made the list buddy

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:43 | 6668992 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Nope.

You kids have more energy. We're gonna leave you the same bullshit they left us...

Only bigger. Enjoy.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:19 | 6669704 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

 

 

You aren't listening.

You are not going to get paid.

The ride is over.

 

THE POLITICIANS & BUREAUCRATS STOLE IT ALL.

THIS ONE HAS JUST PLEAD GUILTY TO KEEP RAHM FROM BEING DIRECTLY IMPLICATED IN COURT:

http://www.wsj.com/articles/former-chicago-schools-chief-pleads-guilty-i...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:17 | 6668061 gatorengineer
gatorengineer's picture

Fuck, its only 100B B for Illinois, lets say 3T nation wide, the fed can print that in a heart beat, give it to the states who buy Stawks, two problems solved....  The price of Stawks goes up and the underfunded liability goes away to overfunded, as Stawk prices rise... Ponzy 101....

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:24 | 6668494 NoDecaf
NoDecaf's picture

Stock gift cards. They can make them faster than FRNs and fling them from helicopters or armored convoys.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:53 | 6668809 Countrybunkererd
Countrybunkererd's picture

Armored convoys?  Seriously?!!?  The plan is that if you want more than one, you can get 2 or even 2000 if you want it, but ONLY if you qualify for an Odumb@$$ phone.  If you work for a living you can't have any, but that is just to ensure that it is fair.  All cards are valid when presented with the phone supplied by the taxpayers, therefore theft is renderd irrelevant.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:52 | 6668596 Omen IV
Omen IV's picture

It is easier for congress to pass Bankruptcy legislation for states and municipalities- no need to pay anyone - the teachers get wiped out by 50% of benefits problem solved

 

lets get it over with - chicago needs another fire  - its been more than 100 years

 

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:33 | 6668758 Upton
Upton's picture

No way, all you have to do is issue a whole bunch of bonds at 3% then you invest the proceeds in the stock market because the stock market always makes 8% a year on average...It may sound STUPID be the idiot govenor of my state is doing that to fund, the under funded pension plan.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:23 | 6668915 lunaticfringe
lunaticfringe's picture

Gator for El Presidente!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:13 | 6669090 TheObsoleteMan
TheObsoleteMan's picture

I got news for you: THAT'S THE PLAN. The ed has already signaled that for the next downturn, massive amounts of stimulus money will be directed at Main Street, instead of Wall Street. They understand to do otherwise might compromise their position.

 


Wed, 10/14/2015 - 22:31 | 6669639 jerry_theking_lawler
jerry_theking_lawler's picture

3 problems. inflation will be about 3000%, so they can buy a loaf of bread with their monthly pension...with some $100 candies at the counter to go with it.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:55 | 6669958 Ace006
Ace006's picture

..

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 01:56 | 6669963 Ace006
Ace006's picture

@gatorengineere

Anyway, we owe that debt to ourselves so all of that is probably unnecessary.

But I love the way you think. That is some devious stuff.(

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:10 | 6668019 localsavage
localsavage's picture

This is going to turn into a real shit show when the market corrects.  The sad part is that every person that I have mentioned this to just looks at me like I have 3 heads.  I swear that the average idiot thinks that these pensions are socked away in some magic savings account.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:33 | 6668179 mtndds
mtndds's picture

The pensions are WAY too generous.  They needed to be cut.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:16 | 6668702 Collapsed
Collapsed's picture

According to the graphic the average is just over $33,000 a year...too generous?  Really?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:04 | 6668850 Countrybunkererd
Countrybunkererd's picture

Try not having a pension.  I have resigned to not retire because I DON'T get a handout from somewhere promised and paid by taxpayers.  I will work less now but work until i turn to worm food.  Where is the generous pensioner when I need money?  MY money goes to theirs but i don't have one of my own...too damn bad for them, maybe they should have planned differently.  They worked a day a week compared to the real world and you think 33K is not generous?  Wake up.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:13 | 6669836 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

+1,000 country.

 

We were taking cuts every 6 months plus layoffs in the private sector, while gubmint employees kept getting 4-6% wage hikes.Adding insult is we canbe fired if a tiny thing goes wrong whereas not one gubmint employee is allowed to be fired no matter how disgusting their mistake; take the VA screw-ups for example. Can't fire VA employees no matter how bad they are.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 02:04 | 6669968 Ace006
Ace006's picture

@son of Loki

Seven of 10 EPA employees make more than $100,000 a year and more than 12,000 of its 16,000 employees were given bonuses last year despite budget cuts.

The giant one-finger salute to the rubes in flyover land.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:41 | 6668970 Depression is Coming
Depression is Coming's picture

So all those years of working you didn't think to yourself to save for retirement? Anyone under 50 has no chance to ever get a pension or social security. You are responsible for yourself your entire life but once you hit 65 you need free shit to survive? You choose to steal from your children and grandchildren..because..well fuck em they haven't worked as long and hard as you have! You should be paying the rest of Americans once you hit 65 for funding your government paycheck for all those years of 0 value added to society.

These old fucks don't deserve 10 dollars a year from taxpayers. Go back to work until you die just like most of your kids will be doing.

I wish the gov sent me the names of people gettig my tax dollars..with a picture... like those commercials to save some poor African kid. Over 200k in taxes paid to Uncle Sam last year.. You are welcome you worthless sacks of shit.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:51 | 6669013 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Teachers average 50K

Over 4200 a month for sitting down 6 hrs. a day for 3/4 of a year?

Good jobs for good wages but not for the guys that pay for them.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 08:58 | 6670474 TxExPat
TxExPat's picture

Average?  Median?  can be a big difference.  Also have to include the really old folks who retired back in the 50's and 60's whose fixed pension has been inflated to near nothingness...  Better question would be to look at the average and medians for those who have retired in the last few years, and the payouts promised for those retiring in the next few... 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:42 | 6668234 daveO
daveO's picture

It's in an iron clad lockbox!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:47 | 6668270 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

...just like the Social Security Trust Fund.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:43 | 6668549 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

IF it was enforced the pension money must stay in Illinois...then there might be a way out of the box...just saying.

What if you were required to also purchase land there....and pay cash into their banksters.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:47 | 6669350 MeBizarro
MeBizarro's picture

It quite easy to fix SSI from an actuarial standpoint including removing the cap on the single most regressive tax on the planet to $250k for starters.  It just requires both sides to make sacrifices. 

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:15 | 6669838 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

You can be sure they will cut SS for seniors before they cut one penny for building drones.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:55 | 6669891 azusgm
azusgm's picture

SSI would have a lot more money left if the laws were followed. It is entirely too easy to get onto SSI these days.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:21 | 6668480 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

" For all intensive purposes..."

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:03 | 6669053 Sokhmate
Sokhmate's picture

intensive Porpoises

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:42 | 6668552 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Please, the "average" person is a fucking idiot with no pension.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:12 | 6668882 Countrybunkererd
Countrybunkererd's picture

you a liberal?  You sure hold to the idea of elitism there, you would fit right in if you aren't.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:30 | 6669860 undertow1141
undertow1141's picture

With mithril doors forged by space dwarves. Impossible for anyone to take their money. Inconceivable.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:29 | 6669297 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

Where did Tyler write this at?  Was it here or on another site.  That is so scary it's not even funny.  Also there is no way that the state even has that money to fund those pension liabiities. 

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:12 | 6668428 nyse
nyse's picture

Just tax Netflix, duh.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 10:34 | 6671008 strangewalk
strangewalk's picture

Illinois WAS an industrial state and lost much of its tax base when the university academic advisors bought into globalization to allow shipping its factories to China. Now they have lost their pensions--this is good.  

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:23 | 6668103 Gilnut
Gilnut's picture

WTF?  Greece is still paying their pensioners.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 19:45 | 6669183 geoffb
geoffb's picture

Austerity measures cut pensions 60%. The new Greek government pinky swears that it will pay the new reduced amount. Just like they pinky swore they would pay the last amount. And they will, right up until they can't. There isn't enough money to pay all the government pensions/promise. Just because someone can keep up with their mortgage payment for a while doesn't mean they won't default tomorrow if they have no more money coming in.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:42 | 6669321 Marco
Marco's picture

That's cute, but you're about a decade late with the balance sheet comment.

The problem has been in the open for quite a while, it's the solutions which are lacking.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 09:38 | 6670721 CallSaul
CallSaul's picture

You are using the wrong phrase.  They are not unfunded liabilities.  They are simply "intangible assets."  See?  Problem solved!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:57 | 6667940 alangreedspank
alangreedspank's picture

next should join soon

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:30 | 6668145 abyssinian
abyssinian's picture

Can the liberals charge gangs illegal gun tax? 

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 00:33 | 6669866 undertow1141
undertow1141's picture

A carbon tax on every round fired.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:00 | 6667956 Fukushima Fricassee
Fukushima Fricassee's picture

Default mother fuckers.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:45 | 6668559 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

Yes, of course, but there are no laws on the books yet on how a state would do that.

Maybe PR or Greece will lay the legal groundwork.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:14 | 6668889 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

THEY JUST DID DEFAULT.

THIS IS A DEFAULT.

NOT PAYING ON TIME IS DEFAULT.

ADMONISHIONS CANNOT AVERT BANKRUPTCY.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:46 | 6669336 Marco
Marco's picture

Pensioners should start a class action lawsuit for not being treated equally with other debtors in the default.

PS. oops, missed it was only a payment into the fund and not a payout to the recipients. Well that's a storm in a teacup then, no happenings just yet.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:07 | 6669716 ThroxxOfVron
ThroxxOfVron's picture

Let a private business miss paying the Social Security with-holdings on time and what happens?

The FEDS should be all over these assholes but won't be because Obama is friends with these criminals..

 

The Politicians and Bureaucrats are taking what is left in the system to pay their own payrolls.

-The equivalent of the Manager telling the floor Employees 'payroll is being held up while a budget problem is being worked out' while heading out the door to cash a check made out to himself.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:03 | 6667973 Hitlery_4_Dictator
Hitlery_4_Dictator's picture

Baaa da ba ba ba......I'm lovin it!  I can't wait for the pension fail domino effect to take hold. Yes!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:16 | 6668055 ZerOhead
ZerOhead's picture

I can wait.

You would be better off having Hell's Angels running your town, state or country rather than the scum and resource sucking politicians, lawyers and their banking masters.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:31 | 6668159 Nick Jihad
Nick Jihad's picture

Ironoically, due to the "Coleman Young" effect, these politicians' future will only become more secure, as anyone with sense leaves Illinois.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 16:27 | 6668504 Al Gophilia
Al Gophilia's picture

Because someone's got to do it right?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:04 | 6667981 Hitlery_4_Dictator
Hitlery_4_Dictator's picture

Baaa da ba ba ba......I'm lovin it!  I can't wait for the pension fail domino effect to take hold. Yes!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:57 | 6668828 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

Don't worry. More government will fix the problem. Just keep voting, citizen.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:33 | 6668953 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

So tiresome.

Pay the bankers, but FUCK THE PEOPLE so they SQUEAL in pain and insist on a budget/higher taxes etc.

Same shopworn playbook every time. Budget problems? Cut the Po-lice, the Fire, the Emergency Services - but all the 100% useless .gov workers continue to draw a paycheck.

And 90% of the people can't see the obvious playbook. Sad.

Thu, 10/15/2015 - 09:06 | 6670514 Ace Ventura
Ace Ventura's picture

BINGO! And this same tired crap is repeated at ALL levels of gobbermint, down to the local county/township level. Let us raise your real-estate and or property taxes citizens.....or we'll have no choice but to lay-off cops and teachers! Why do you want to sacrifice community safety and the chilrenz future edumakayshun?!! All over a few pennies in taxes?!!

 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:52 | 6669024 holmes
holmes's picture

I wonder how many of the scum, er pensioners, have left the State because taxes are too high?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:17 | 6669732 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

I'm betting Madigan, Rauner and Munger are still getting paid, no matter the weather.

 

FORWARD PEOPLE'S PARADISE OF LINCOLN!

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 23:42 | 6669794 Yohimbo
Yohimbo's picture

CRASH THIS PIG

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:50 | 6667901 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Wonder how many retired praetorians will be hit?

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:13 | 6668044 Agent P
Agent P's picture

None (yet).  This is a delayed pension funding, not a delay in payments to retirees. 

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:28 | 6668138 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

When eventuality turns into reality.

All in time. 

Betcha pretty ballerina will be outta there when it hits.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:50 | 6667902 Dragon HAwk
Dragon HAwk's picture

I'm an Old man... I'd hit that...

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 15:01 | 6667964 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

I am too, but I would use a baseball bat.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:50 | 6667905 10mm
10mm's picture

No lottery payout above 25K, and now no pension money kicking out. Send Bernie Sanders to advocate more free and taxes.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 17:10 | 6668680 PTR
PTR's picture

After I read about that, I stopped playing my buck a week in the Illinois lottery and had family in Indiana play numbers for me.  Screw that.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 18:12 | 6668880 chubbar
chubbar's picture

Anyone who now plays a 14 million to 1 odds lottery knowing there is a 100% chance they won't collect IF they should win, is truly the village idiot.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 20:59 | 6669397 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

actually the odds are about the same, lol

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:51 | 6667909 Bloodstock
Bloodstock's picture

IL can thank Mike Madigan for the stalemate for not getting anything done, just trying to make the new governor look bad.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:52 | 6667915 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Allow me to translate;

"What pension you ignorant sheep?!?"

move along.

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 14:52 | 6667916 NOZZLE
NOZZLE's picture

Rainer has to fix the mess created by IslamoNaziCrats.

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