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ISIS Tries To Blow Up Russian Bombers With Flying Condom Bombs
If you’re a black flag-waving, sword-wielding, desert bandit in white basketball shoes, you’ve got a lot of options when it comes to terrorizing the locals on the way to racking up territorial gains. After all, indiscriminately killing civilians and conducting brutal executions can exert a powerful psychological effect on non combatants and on poorly trained, ill-prepared army regulars for weak Mid-East states.
You don’t, however, have a lot of options when it comes to countering an all-out aerial bombardment by one of the most powerful militaries on the planet. Your options are even more limited if said aerial bombardment is backed by thousands of fearless militiamen belonging to a group that’s been fighting Mid-East proxy wars for more than three decades.
So, with Russia in the skies over Syria and Hezbollah on the ground, ISIS is in a tough spot. But you know what they say: when the going gets tough, the tough get going, which explains why Islamic State has devised an innovative strategy for countering Russian airstrikes.
What they’ll do, you see, is inflate condoms and attach a homemade mine to them. They'll then float the condoms into the sky in an effort to create a kind of condom bomb sky minefield. That, ISIS figures, should deter Russian fighter jets.
Here’s Sputnik with some epic sarcasm:
Left with little recourse in the face of relentless Russian airstrikes, the self-proclaimed Islamic State terrorist group has apparently resorted to a fairly unique defensive strategy. According a video that surfaced online on Wednesday, the group has begun launching homemade condom bombs, hoping they’ll somehow veer into a Russian bomber.
While Sputnik cannot independently verify the authenticity of the video, it appears to show IS militants creating aerial mines out of condoms, which are then released into the skies over Idlib.
The entire arts-and-crafts project is shown, scored to look like some kind of bizarre extremist music video.
In a desperate move, the contraceptive contraptions are seemingly meant to drift into Russian bombers as they fly overhead. A clever – if fairly ineffective – strategy.
Yes, a “fairly ineffective strategy” indeed. Here’s the video:
As Sputnik goes on to note, "why IS prefers condoms to simple, run-of-the-mill balloons, is unclear, but if they think a bunch of exploding rubbers are going to scare off the military, they’ve clearly never been to Fleet Week."
At least now we know why the US has had such a hard time achieving results with 13 months of airstrikes - the condom bombs must be disrupting the operation...
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You stupids have not learn anything from Afghanistan but Russians did. Terrorists have such weapons but again they are failing to destroy a single helo let alone russian aircrafts. They are operating with improvised tactics in Syria , go figure . Follow facts before writing your tirade.
Reminds me of the tethered blimps over London .... in WWII .... before condoms were invented ?
Dry cleaning bags filled with swamp gas.
To bring down a Russian jet .... you need something as big as a Canadian goose .... or a human head ?
Or a frozen chicken...
http://www.snopes.com/science/cannon.asp
Heads up !
1300 years of first cousin marriage. If the inbreeding doesn't lead to fata lcongenital birth defects, it certainly leads to stymied intellectual capacity.
You cruel anti-semite. Is there no low you won't descend too?
You stupid linguist. You need to bone up on your correct use of words.
Being pro one group of Semites and anti another group, makes you no more antisemitic than being pro-GOP and anti-Democrat makes you anti-American. Dumb-ass*!
* With apologies to donkeys.
p.s. Feisty Kirk's back. Anyone else want to step into the Fight Club ring? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?
That remark about "bizzare extremist music video" is priceless.
Pinacle of Middle Eastern culture. They should save those condoms...no one needs a bunch of illegitimate camels running around seeking assylum in Western Europe. *99 luftballons*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--8a4QsiO9Q
As good as the condom bombs are, the above video is much more entertaining. I was crying watching it.
Yep, humanity's 1st comedy war.
So, who has dropped tons of condoms to ISIL?
Next thing you know, they will be dropping unsold McDonald's hamburgers in the middle of the desert (all footed by the US taxpayer).
I'm pretty sure that dropping unsold McDonald's hamburgers on people constitutes a war crime.
Memo to ISIS Engineering Dept.
What goes up must come down. It's called "gravity".
Look it up.
I did look it up and also discovered that the opposite of gravity is... wait for it...Comedy.
That's Trojan work they're doing
"get the fuck otta here..."
-Axel Foley-
And there are people in the US government who think ISIS is our biggest threat.
Who are the fucktards?
I expect these whopping condoms have got "medium Islamic size" stamped on them.....
Didn't know that US air drops condom as well.
Condoms and clean syringes .... are the first things they drop ?
Scared the hell out of me.
Bunch of dicks
Inshallah, we will drop condom bombs randomly and indiscriminately on the land we claim to love so much. Yes, and Allah said, tie bombs to phallic symbols and float them over your homeland.
As long as they're halal condoms, Allah approves.
Gee?... I didn't know the party faithful to this CIA/Mossad Jihad operation used "protection" or for that matter knew how to use it given that there dominate modus has been to rape the women and children cut off heads and barbeque human organs for consumption and video taping it just the way Colonel Steele trained them and our boyz in uniform?...
Who knew Brennan at Langley had that base covered?... Or thought of creative ways for alternative use if they weren't using protection while raping the locals?!!!
Maybe Ron Howard can make an Apollo 13 type movie out of this story?!!!!
Thank you for ending my week with the most wonderful smile!!!
The stupidity of ISIS is beginning to rival that of the Fed. That should be the end of them because the US hates competition on that one.
Exposes their ultimate strategy:
Taking over the world via population.
Hence using up the supply of condoms the west hoists on their population.
No condoms, increased baby rates, more refugees flowing into the west and sapping scarce resources, and changing country populations.
Sounds like something Kissinger would approve.
Thank god sheep and donkies can't get pregnant, we'd have already been run over by muslim hordes.
This, my friends, ranks right up there with the Bread Helmet.
The bread helmet at least would work against a nightstick--real bread with real crust, that is.
Bread helmet, fo dog (riot dog), and now this...maybe, just maybe, not quite everything isn't new under the sun.
These are the bogeymen everyone has been so afraid of ? Looks like amateur hour. Those things have zero chance of taking down a jet, but they will probably maim a few curious children when they come back down to earth.
Then, flying children parts will take down those planes.
We have some kids.
Come on ISIS, please don't prove Obama was right when he said you are the JV team.
I think the intent is that they will explode and confuse targetting systems?
Got a chuckle out of the fleet week reference.
'The entire arts and crafts project is shown' Hahahahahaha
Clearly the fuckwads funning California will attempt to outlaw condoms in order to prevent such terroristic acts.
Russia will stabilize the middle east whereas Barry and his community disorganizers destabilize the area.
Russia did in a few weeks what it took the US 2 years to do.
Barry supported ISIS.
"Russia did in a few weeks what it took the US 2 years to do."
Russia did in a few weeks what the US pretended to do for 2 years.
It's called propaganda, the US pretends to strike ISIS when they're instead striking Syrian infrastructure and dropping supplies to ISIS.
can't propagandize in Syria? then do it in Iraq:
"Fearing ‘imminent mass execution,’ by ISIL, ‘perhaps within hours,’ U.S. troops raid Iraq jail, free 70 prisoners"and a whole lot of gullibles will still believe the malarkey coming out of the Pentagon
So... Those CIA training courses these guys were all sent on... And the embedded special forces "advisors"... I'm going to nudge my odds of Russia winning the next world war up a bit.
Why do they call camels ships of the desert....
Because they are full of Muslum Semen..... (cymbal crash)
I presume these rubbers are used......
Wait until you see what they have planned for Butt Plugs - scary
I call BS. If you inflate a condom to maximum size with hydrogen or helium (3ft diameter) how much weight can it lift, a few ounces, an effective mine has to weigh 10 pounds. Think of helium balloons you can buy at the party store. ISIS has a ready supply of hydrogen, helium?
Hydrogen will lift 1kg (2lbs) per cubic metre of volume.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lifting_gas#Hydrogen_versus_helium
Doesn't have to be hydrogen though it's probably the easiest to produce and has the best lifting capacity.
Well phony ISIS had a ready supply of money, guns, TOWs, ammo, all sorts of communications equipment and lots and lots of drugs plus healthcare. Think of the Cubans at the Bay of Pigs except with endless stuff and support from McCain/Obama/Langley
My guess is the supply lines and communications are not doing so well.
You do not need 10 lbs of modern explosive to do the job.. Not even close try again..
Its amazing, after 13 months of supposedly being under constant air attack by the US they seem to need to resort to these desperate measures after only 3 weeks of the Russians blowing the crap out of them, it almost makes you think that the US aerial assault on ISIS was a complete sham...
Cuz it wuz.
.... almost.... !
Next inflatable sex dolls to distract Russian pilots so they fly against a condom bomb.
Allah said condoms are no longer needed when fucking camels and goats. They may as well use them for something.
The US couldn't defeat these idiots?!?
The US could not deflate these idiots. FIFY :)
The US couldn't protect these idiots...
these idiots are US proxies, so these idiots are US idiots
the US were running a hoax that the Russians unmasked pretty quickly
only die hard "patridiots" couldn't see the hoax
and there's still plenty of "patridiots" to convert
I'm interested in the technical details of their "plan": what gas do they use? I guess it's hydrogen, since it's easy to produce by water electrolysis. It would be ironic if they blew themselves up while doing it, because hydrogen/oxygen mixture is explosive. Helium is safer but more expensive and harder to get.
So this is what Sandra Fluke did with all that subsidized birth control.
So THAT was what the 50 tons of random airdrop was?
They kept the ribbed knobblers for their 4-footed friends..
When the politicians try to scare you into thinking 'they're out to get us', look at the evidence of whom 'they' are.
'They' normally come in two forms -
1. Sand monkeys in 10-20 year old Toyota trucks with rusty AK47s (it's such a good gun that even with rust it works, nevertheless look at what they're up against with the western troops). Look at these jokers as a good example.
2. Kids with anarchy on their brains (like lot's of kids around the world). The problem for them however is they have to find time to cause havoc because most of their time is spent playing video games and/or watching porn. In the Uk whenever they arrest 'terror suspects' they're normally just kids.
Summary: 'They' might get a few of us, but they pose zero threat overall.
well, there is a difference, ISIS are just a sham, they are not real, they are mostly just brainwashed teenagers and crazies, who serve as a cover for CIA operations. However, the real forces to reckon with in Syria are those "moderate" rebels, i.e. Al-Quaeda and its branches. These are all professional mercenaries, mostly very well trained, who fought in Afghanistan, Libya etc. So it is not that easy for Hezbollah and Syrian Army to defeat them. It will take some time. And this is also why the USA cries so much that Russia is killing their moderate rebels. They don't care so much about ISIS, but they do care about their highly trained and costly "moderate" mercenaries.
Those punks have no real sex lives. So....war!
So the US dropped 50 tons of condoms into no man's land - not ammo and guns?
It was a kickback to planned parenthood.
well, they dropped a load. i guess the condoms were optional
Many faces are always covered with McCain/Obama's phony "Isis" because much of ISIS is not Syrian or even Muslim.
Xe, Academie, Blackwater, Langley, Mi6, Zios and many other evil clowns and mercs.
Assuming a select few know not of our numbering system, let alone algebra.
Overgeneralization...it's a good thing.
/s
IED
Inflatable Explosive Devices?
Keep a good "grip" on yer IUD, MsCreant! :>D
Interchangeable Ejaculation Devices
Follow the money... which one of our congress fucktards owns a shitload of stock in a condom company. Guaranteed that's who is really behind this tactic.
Oh, BTW... Trojan just launched a new NFL ad campaign... wait 'till you see the blimp!!!
The real Trojan was sent to Europe. This is just to divert attention.
WHen Obama was bombing they didn't do anything. I wonder why?
Gonna be a lotta pregnant goats next month.
Adult sized condoms too big for the Muzzies... gotta use them somehow.
As 99 condom balloons go by?
99 condoms of bomb on the wall
99 condoms of bomb
if one of those condoms should happen to fall
98 condoms of bomb on the wall.
(take large chug and continue)
This is truly bad news--these condoms were probably from one of the random airdrops that Obama intended to get into the rebels hands. Since these condoms went to the Middle East that mean Planned Parenthood is passing out ammo?
Didn't the US recently air-drop 50 tons of condoms?
And a cylinder of helium.
That drop was for the refugees. You know....To fly out of harms way. Blow 'em up and hang on for dear life.
Another State Dept. program gone wrong...
The helium was so the ISIS executioner could talk like Donald Duck while he's slitting throats.
Just remember your taxpayer dollars went towards the purchase of thousands of gloves for men to have sex with goats and use them as bombs.
Thank god Washington is in good hands.
Next they will put plastic over the toilet seat.
Maybe condoms are harder to see than regular balloons (being relatively clear in comparison).
The surprising thing to me is that there are so many condoms available.
99 luft kondoms
...Und jeder healt sich fuer Captain Kirk.
Das gab ein grosses Feuerwerk
Well the joke's on them, Mr P's bombers all have hatpins along the nose and leading edges.
So there!
What a bunch of clowns.
Impressive.........they should work for the state department........ then again based on our innovation, maybe they already do
Watching the video, I think their music has a better chance of killing you.
Some CIA operative at the nearest embassy probably came up with that one. I saw that one the condoms said Hilliary 2016 on the side of it.
Probably bags of fresh goat shit tied to them, in an effort to cover SU fighter windsheilds. Brilliant.
What a great recruiting video, and catchy tune as well.
Trojan lubricated,eom
Surface to Air condoms are quite a novel idea; and when they don't hit anything... what goes up must come down (hopefully on some of their oil refineries).
How much you want to bet. Those condoms were bought with your hard earned US taxpayer dollars?
What will they do next? Wave their private parts at their aunties? Send in the Killer Rabbit, or the Black Knight?
It's game over. Even if they had the rabbit Putin would just use the Holy Hand Grenade.
It's not the explosion itself that hurts airplanes.
It is the little projectiles that the explosion propells through the aircraft skin, which will make the friction of the air tear the aircraft apart.
Guys,
Condoms aren't going to punch holes in anything, no matter how much you accelerate them.
Condoms are free, shopping bags are paid. 'nuff said.
You know it's a slow news day when there's a flying condom bomb story at the top of ZH.
There's always room for this kind of thing! Any laugh in this grim time is a small treasure.
It's an interesting "Man Bites Dog" Story
This is dumbest, weirdest, most ineffective tactic I have ever heard of. It's insane that they even allowed their own people to waste time like this.
Just goes to show you how stupid the puppet masters actually think the MSM-consuming public are. Says less about them and more about who they believe their audience is.
I don't know. para-dropping ammunition into the desert for whoever cares to pick it up seems dumber, but that's only if you believe the mythical "moderate/secular Syrian freedom fighters" still exist.
Dunno
Ash Carter has been working for months with his wife on it.
wake me when they use depleted uranium in the reservoir tips. That'll show the Russkies!
What would the SecretSVC do if a flying condom was over the WHITeHoUS_E?
Try to find someone with a penis...
Michelle/Michael
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cgk732vfGQ (25 seconds)
BTW - In Daniel 11:37, the bible tells us that THE anti-christ may very well be a homosexual and at minimum, no desire for women.
He shall regard neither the God of his fathers nor the desire of women, nor regard any god; for he shall exalt himself above them all.- Daniel 11:37 in describing THE anti-Christ.
Obama is neither Christian or Muslim; he favors Muslims over Christian because men, by nature love darkness/evil...it is why humanity practices it and cannot even keep commandments 5-10, much less 1-3. Christ is 6.
I am not saying Obama is THE anti-Christ; he is an anti-Christ as are all who do not love Christ. However, he could be given the times we are in in relation to Scriptures.
The contents inside your head are not much different from the contents inside a condom after it is pulled off and tossed away.
Crocodile-from-deNial, you may want to widen your religious knowledge with some modern knowledge applied to the OT.
Try this for starters: A Histoty of God, Part 1
They would be too busy chasing whores and getting drunk to notice.
Reminds me of Japan's incendiary toting balloons they launched at the US toward the end of WW II. Come fly with me!
The only stateside casualty of the war..
Indeed, I can now understand why the World's Smartest Dictator Man, Obama, has been so afraid to take these guys on for reals!
I'll grant you that he'd be out of his league trying to take on this “JV team”, but the reality is that he was creating and supporting them. The only terrorists he’s interested in “taking on” are those most dangerous “Sovereign Citizens” (which will turn out to be anyone that opposes the domestic power grabs).
Just wait until they break out the nuclear dildos.
Scudd Dildoes. This is ISIS you know.
CIA is absolutely baffled by how they got the condoms.
Meanwhile in a downtown Philly high school, a full box of C4, rocket launchers, and assault rifles show up on 'Aid's day'.
lol
I think this directly implicates Planned Parenthood. For sure.
I'd bet it was a Minneapolis high school. Now that it's getting harder to ship over the students to fight for ISIS, they can at least ship over the student's condoms. They only make balloon animals out of them anyway.
So they stay aloft for two hours and then, guess what?
If they stay aloft for more than 4 hours, seek medical attention.
Somebody should tell them that you use lubed rubbers for Urban survival (fun without STD or child support), and non-lubed for Rural survival (as emergency water bottles/bags).
Never leave home w/o them. What's in your wallet?
p.s. Do the white Toyota trucks come with a condom dispenser, or do the new Gen of Nike hi-tops come with condom pockets (for 'rising' stars)?
the song in the condom video rocks it!!!!!
It's never original, always sounds the same. Comon, with all that money they are getting from the oil you would think they could come up with something better.
But the big question her is;
Were they used condoms??????
Nothing worse than getting sand in a condom. Otherwise known as an organ grinder.
Time to airdrop some K-Y.
No doubt the condoms were provided by Islamic Feminists.
Funny you should mention that. FEMEN, the West's go-to 'feminist' organisation (do not pay any attention to the fact that it was created by a man) has joined Syrian 'activist' Ahmed Zaino and come out in support of 'moderate Syrian rebels'.
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=630_1445020857
Zaino's (sole) claim to fame seems have been a stunt in which he threw ping-pong balls filled with red ink (symbolic blood, geddit?) into a fountain in Damscus near Assad's hangout. Apparently this was done in spite of heavy presence of Syrian intelligence men. The stunt was so effective he claims it took 2 weeks to remove traces of red from the water. Strangely in this world of selfies and instant youtube records, there is no obvious evidence of this amazing stunt. I guess that means the incredibly oppressive Syrian intelligence people managed to remove all records of this heroic action.
http://www.everydayrebellion.net/syrian-activist-ahmed-zaino-fights-with...
FEMEN also came out in suport of the neo-Nazis who set afire the Trades Union building in Odessa, in which at least 48 people, including women and children, died after being burned alive. One of the women, pregnant at the time, was raped and stranged by one of the asssailants.
Finally, a good use for condoms.
After taking off the women's burqhas the ISIS men suddenly realized they no longer had a need for condoms.
Well - apparently its working -
"When I became the NASA administrator, (President Obama) charged me with three things. One, he wanted me to help re-inspire children to want to get into science and math; he wanted me to expand our international relationships; and third, and perhaps foremost, he wanted me to find a way to reach out to the Muslim world and engage much more with dominantly Muslim nations to help them feel good about their historic contribution to science, math and engineering."
Love the music on this video clip - Tyler are you going to use that as back ground music for all your videos? I mean, don't you too want to reach out to the Muslim world and engage much more with dominantly Muslim nations to help them feel good about their historic contribution to science, math and engineering." Yep, I know you'll do your part!
just shows how ludicrous US policy and pols be
Fake, crank article which ZH obligingly reprints. There are no such things as condoms over there as its against their religion. Not unless they are being supplied by Uncle Fraud?
Secondly, where are they going to get the helium? At the local Walmart? The local gift shop? The local grocery store? Unless of course its supplied by Uncle Fraud.
This is an article for gullibles. Or its another Onion article, take your pick.
This goes to show how ridiculus the stories are about ISIS and how much they are NOT a threat to this country. 9/11 was a very complicated plan, and stories like this proves that ISIS, AL-CIA-Da, etc are not capable of doing such elaborate schemes in using archiac ways. Russia almost completely detroyed ISIS in a week vs US +8yrs. All this is, for control of Syria, and after Syria...Iran. We know the game plan, its sooo blatant and in our face now.
I know what's going on here, they've recruited " Comical Ali " , and he gave strict orders stating, " make sure the infidels go out with a bang ! "
Alans Snack Bar !
During Gulf War 1---Did they intend to drop IUD's but instead dropped IED's ?
OT trivia: back in the Stone Age a condom was referred to as rock around the cock.
Happy Days Theme: Rock around the Cock.
we're gonna rock, rock, rock, 'til broad day light, we're gonna rock, rock, rock, a rock around the cock.
During WW2 special condoms were officially issued by the Allies to protect gun barrels. They were just like normal condoms except quite a bit longer and thicker. Churchill knew some of them would eventually fall into Nazi hands and saw potential for psyops... He ordered that they be marked "Condoms for recreational use by British Troops - Medium Size"
The so-called "music" in that video made me sick to my stomach!!
"we saw dozens of UFOs"...................No it was light from the moon reflecting off of ISIS condoms giving the illusion of UFOs
So what's the lead story on ZH today?
Condom bombs.
You've come a long way baby! Long way down.
Now I’m convinced that ISIS was a 5-eyes asset. LOL (was, because the eastern coalition may have eliminated them before I finish typing…)
Perhaps the next western coalition scene will be some be some crony-capitalist corporate welfare; a few Billion in emergency funding to the usual suspects to study and recommend countermeasures for this insidious threat.