This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Caught On Tape: U.S. Army Jeep Rear-Ends A Nuke

Tyler Durden's picture




 

With helicopters hovering overhead, and surrounded by an army of security forces,  this is how America transports its nuclear weapons. However, as this onlooker captures, amid police harrassment for filming, it appears one of the military trucks was just a little too close and rear-ends a truck carrying a nuclear missile.

 

As the person recording exclaimed, "The crazy thing is that the fed pulled over and was yelling and waving his hands that I can't record this video. And then a truck rear-ended the nuke."

 

The incident appears to have taken place in Great Falls, Montana:

If this happens on a well maintained street in America, one can imagine the probability of a "happy ending" involving US and Russian fighter jets flying over Syria...

 

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:53 | 6749038 SHEEPFUKKER
SHEEPFUKKER's picture

Exactly where is the nuke truck going?

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:54 | 6749040 A L I E N
A L I E N's picture

Tax dollars hard at work

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:57 | 6749062 quintago
quintago's picture

where is anything going these days

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:03 | 6749093 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

Whats the point of the dog & pony show?  The Soviets "lost" hundreds of these things.  

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:32 | 6749217 Bokkenrijder
Bokkenrijder's picture

That's why they teach you in driving school to keep a safe distance to the car in front of you!

Next time, just wrap some of that bubble plastic around it, put it in a box with those Styrofoam balls in it and send it by DHL/FedEx.

Probably much safer...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:40 | 6749245 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Nuke was rear ended right is front of the Flamingo Casino and Lounge, 3028 10th Ave. S. Great Falls, Montana.

Place your bets!!!

https://www.google.com/maps/place/Flamingo+Lounge/@47.4939709,-111.25367...!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s__oLxi4o0uWT2Lc899lcQA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656!4m2!3m1!1s0x0:0xcee489ee5c61e2c5!6m1!1e1

https://irs3.4sqi.net/img/general/width960/Knx03gKAABneIP58ffVNDF9wDwBJo...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:40 | 6749267 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

Maybe it was Caitlyn Jenner driving.

.

With her dick & nuts out.

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:44 | 6749289 TruxtonSpangler
TruxtonSpangler's picture

Non-story distraction of the week. Look what the other hand is doing immediately!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:48 | 6749291 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

...it appears one of the military trucks was just a little too close and rear-ends a truck carrying a nuclear missile.

Give our Stormtroopers a break. 

"I can't see a thing in this helmet."

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:54 | 6749312 Momauguin Joe
Momauguin Joe's picture

Every Day Is Like Sunday.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHBZFSYA12A

 

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:06 | 6749388 Lurk Skywatcher
Lurk Skywatcher's picture

<---- What hasn't the US Military rear ended lately?

<---- Obviously you, but thats why you're angry.

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:41 | 6749516 pelican
pelican's picture

Shit happens.  It was not going to go off.  It takes someone to pull the trigger.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 17:06 | 6750170 Debt-Penitent
Debt-Penitent's picture

The driver of the semi is under orders to not stop or slow for any reason.  Lead vehicles are ordered to smash blockages aside. 

The follow vehicle could have been reminding the semi driver to stay on course with "gentile persuasion".   BAM, keep moving!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 17:13 | 6750213 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

An error occurred.

Please try again later.

Learn More

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:52 | 6749869 Surviver22
Surviver22's picture

If this happens America won't be on World map anymore..

http://motivationdose.com/is-america-babylon/

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:37 | 6749500 sdmjake
sdmjake's picture

yep.

Nukes, terrorists, Guns...all these things together have killed a lot less people this year than Pharmaceuticals.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 17:14 | 6750216 omniversling
omniversling's picture

We rear-ended some folks (Barry and Michael)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:39 | 6749257 HowdyDoody
HowdyDoody's picture

The rabidly anti-Russian CFR says there are no confirmed reports of lost or stolen ex-Soviet nukes. They also say that the Russians have broken up hundreds of nuclear material smuggling operations. Maybe that is what you mean? Nuclear material is more easily obtained from junked scientific and medical equipment.

http://www.cfr.org/weapons-of-mass-destruction/loose-nukes/p9549#p2

From conjecture to reality. In 2007 6 cruise missiles were loaded onto a B-52 at Minot AFB. They had veriable yield nuclear warheads. The weapons were loaded totally outside the mandatory controls for handling nuclear weapons.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:31 | 6749211 yogibear
yogibear's picture

"where is anything going these days"

To India and China. 

Maybe they hired some Illegals or H1Bs to drive the trucks.

Anything that seems outrageous is probably true these days.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:25 | 6749995 83_vf_1100_c
83_vf_1100_c's picture

Maybe they hired some felons to drive the trucks. obama just used his pen. Cuz everbody deserves a chance to join the workforce.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:50 | 6750097 venturen
venturen's picture

Obama is sending it to Iran!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:33 | 6749229 Pooper Popper
Pooper Popper's picture

Look, Mummy. There's an airplane up in the sky.

Oooooooo ooo ooo ooooh
Did you see the frightened ones
Did you hear the falling bombs
Did you ever wonder
Why we had to run for shelter
When the promise of a brave new world
Unfurled beneath a clear blue sky
Oooooooo ooo ooooo oooh
Did you see the frightened ones
Did you hear the falling bombs
The flames are all long gone
But the pain lingers on
Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye
Goodbye

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:33 | 6749230 Pooper Popper
Pooper Popper's picture

Look, Mummy. There's an airplane up in the sky.

Oooooooo ooo ooo ooooh
Did you see the frightened ones
Did you hear the falling bombs
Did you ever wonder
Why we had to run for shelter
When the promise of a brave new world
Unfurled beneath a clear blue sky
Oooooooo ooo ooooo oooh
Did you see the frightened ones
Did you hear the falling bombs
The flames are all long gone
But the pain lingers on
Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye
Goodbye

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:25 | 6749459 Johnny Horscaulk
Johnny Horscaulk's picture

www.youtube.com/watch?v=I82-CF6EaY0


My father told me "son, it's futile to resist,
You can topple ideology but not the armies they enlist."
I questioned the intentions of the boy scouts chanting war.
"Well that's the sound of freedom, son" he said.
(Free to say no more.)
But wait a minute dad, did you actually say freedom?
Well, if you're dumb enough to vote,
You're fuckin dumb enough to believe him.
Cuz if this country is so goddam free,
Then I can burn your fucking flag wherever I damn well please.
(And then I'm gonna stick it up your fucking ass)
I carried their anthem, convinces it was mine.
Rhymeless, unreasoned conjecture kept me in line.
But then I stood back and wondered what the fuck had they done to me.
Made accomplice to all that I'd promised I would never fucking be.
Never be.
You carry their anthem convinces that it's yours.
Invitation to honor. Invitation to war.
Bette Midler now assumes sainthood.
Romanticize murder for moral.
Tie a yellow ribbon round the oak tree my friend,
And "Gee Wally, that's swell!"
Fuck the troops to hell!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:51 | 6749315 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

At least nowhere would be somewhere when we get there.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWtCittJyr0

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:31 | 6749220 wisefool
wisefool's picture

+100000000000

Nuclear Power is the lipstick on the pig of the Nuclear Armament race, which ensures all foriegn policy is dictated by the M.A.D. framework for all nations, whether they wanted to be idiots or not.

And only Fascist/Communist tax codes could support/spawn the clusterfuck. There is no possible other economic model that could support the expense. There is no private entity on earth who could underwrite the liabilities (meltdowns, waste clean up) so only soviergn immunity can provide the legal cover.

Academic/medical nuclear technology would be 50 years ahead right now, possibly onto fusion if Oppehiemer would have have said  ... ehhh ... I'll keep my existing job, and at the same time we were committed to put boots on the ground to irradicate any weaponization of it anywhere on the planet. (the M.A.S. policy instead of M.A.D.)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:49 | 6749298 TruxtonSpangler
TruxtonSpangler's picture

So youre assessing 1950's nuke power plants based on updcaled submarine designs as a failure? Check out 5th gen breeder reactors for a real eye opener about the future of abundant clean energy. Actual nuke technology is about 50 years past your wildest dreams. You really think nuke advances have been abandoned? Seriously?

A better question is what is stopping us from shutting down the dangerous and costly 50's nuke plants (ie GE heavy water) in favor of this new nuke tech? Who would stand to lose a lot of money if there were safe clean energy?

Check your carefully media constructed programming on nuclear power for real world updates.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:59 | 6749356 wisefool
wisefool's picture

+1 Two words. Yucca Mountain.

If the tech path you mentioned is valid, (¿50 years ahead?) how come we had to spend billions on a containment facility for waste? Only to have Harry Reid say it is not safe to store it there.

Please unpack that for me while I am digging up some textbooks.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:21 | 6749443 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

Because there is a moratorum on reprocessing fuel rods due to fears of proliferation.  It is a political issue.   We also have not been pushing for reactors with a complete fuel cycle. 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:48 | 6750046 wisefool
wisefool's picture

There is plenty of low level waste from failed facilities that could be transported there, that is a-political.

But yeah, back to our "income-tax-is-volentary" Politicians. Let's create a treaty that says you can not "process" or move spent fuel rods. That way they are evenly distributed indefinitely around the nation in temporary cooling pools above ... wait for it ... operating nuclear reactors. But yup, moving missles around is A-0kay!

See how all that works together? I am old, and not as sharp as I used to be, but I garentee I have the formal engineering, tax law, corporatism, and history education to put the pieces of the whole deal together. Unlike the more silo'ed (statist) people ...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:23 | 6749451 PirateOfBaltimore
PirateOfBaltimore's picture

Yucca is there to hand waste from 60 year old tech. Breeder reactors have far less waste generation. We don't need Yucca for them.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:06 | 6749625 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

Clean Coal!! Just put some carbon filters on the chimney every year or so

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:21 | 6749441 prmths2
prmths2's picture

"...if Oppehiemer would have have said  ... ehhh ... I'll keep my existing job"

Oppenheimer's skill enabled the fission bomb to be developed in a timely fashion, but The Manhattan Project was so vast and people such as Teller were so committed to developing weapons, it was going to happen anyway. Without Oppenheimer, things could have been worse. After all, Oppenheimer had misgivings about the bomb, but Teller was part of the inspiration for the character Dr. Strangelove.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:47 | 6750075 wisefool
wisefool's picture

Agreed. Posted above. at the risk of duplication he facilitated the project. But without him (and a war provisioning tax code) the M.A.D. scientist types would have killed themselves trying to kill the others long before the weapons were perfected.

Stockdale (gulf of tonkin) , Woodrow Wilson (federal reserve/IRS), Eisenhower (M.I.C.), Patton (russians), Oppenheimer. All told the truth before they died, with contrition. Nobody listened.

J. Robert Oppenheimer: "I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds." (youtube)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:29 | 6749742 Expectorant
Expectorant's picture

You can hear it soon from the propagandist, Western Mass Media. Putin again gets the blame...this time, for rear ending an American nuke.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:59 | 6749075 FreeShitter
FreeShitter's picture

To a false flag near you.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:51 | 6749320 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Driving to the scene of the accident.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:57 | 6749345 Implied Violins
Implied Violins's picture

And there's always enough fuel to reach the crash site.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:00 | 6749080 1000yrdstare
1000yrdstare's picture

Good thing it wasn't a Pinto he rear ended.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:03 | 6751520 Joe A
Joe A's picture

That is sucha hilarious movie. Silly humour but great. And this scene is just amazing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDNjDnKxAfA

And this is how it was actually acted: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czuC1LWcPMc

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:09 | 6749114 tmosley
tmosley's picture

It's going to be paradropped to moderate Syrian rebels to defend against the Ruskies.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:21 | 6749163 Grandad Grumps
Grandad Grumps's picture

Not sure where it was going, but according to one commentator on the Youtube page, the place that it happened was Great Falls Montana, 10th Avenue South.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:25 | 6749180 1stepcloser
1stepcloser's picture

Charleston Harbor...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:41 | 6749273 boattrash
boattrash's picture

Mayberry, Barney Fife transporting nukes...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:38 | 6749252 terryg999
terryg999's picture

It's going to "accidently' find its way into ISIS' hands.  Boy, Obama is going to be oissed when he reads about it in the paper.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:52 | 6749323 Expectorant
Expectorant's picture

Betcha the nuke driver will sue for whiplash...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:11 | 6749405 MasterControl
MasterControl's picture

China

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:25 | 6749460 Tyrone Shoelaces
Tyrone Shoelaces's picture

Guessing Taco Bell, but then again it looks like morning time so maybe Dunkin Donuts.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:43 | 6749523 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

A watering hole might be a safer bet.  The ONLY thing OST does is transport nukes on public roads, and yet they have enough alcohol abuse problems to this "sternly worded memo"

Letter Report on “Inspection of Allegations Relating to Irregularities in the Human Reliability Program and Alcohol Abuse within the Office of Secure Transportation” (INS-L-11-01, S09IS012/S09IS013) 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:19 | 6749690 Magnix
Magnix's picture

What makes you think they are carry a nuclear weapon? Got prove? That doesnt tell me anything about it.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:26 | 6749728 Shaznardickleze...
Shaznardickleze the Doon's picture

I'm wagering $5 mystical great seal bucks it's headed to the CME.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:49 | 6749852 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Yes! Which City is to be the target of this device?

Alciaduh, Al-Mossad, and WasWas need to find better drivers.

So, I guess we can expect a nuke to go off sometime in the next few days or a week.

Plus, how do we know this is the only nuke they are driving around? Perhaps .gov intends to murder ten or twenty million US Serfs in several cities!

Knowing Bath House, he'll set them off in Texas, the South, and in the midwest, anywhere he can exterminate as many YTs as possible!

Where are my Civil Defense manuals? I have to find them.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:17 | 6749953 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

Dick Cheney's barn?

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 23:40 | 6752201 Abbie Normal
Abbie Normal's picture

"Exactly where is the nuke truck going?"

Either it's going to/from Malstrom AFB, or to/from one of dozens of minuteman silos scattered in the surrounding region.  Great Falls, Montana -- a target-rich environment for sure.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:54 | 6749041 LowerSlowerDela...
LowerSlowerDelaware_LSD's picture

Not to worry - they won't go off until Dear Leader presses The Button and He lost The Button on the 18th hole somewhere.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:30 | 6749210 Grandad Grumps
Grandad Grumps's picture

Someone else picked up his ball marker.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:55 | 6749045 One And Only
One And Only's picture

 "the fed pulled over and was yelling and waving his hands that I can't record this video. And then a truck rear-ended the nuke."

- Obama's foreign policy

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:14 | 6749134 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Wait, wait, wait, we have a foreign policy? Well, I'll be damned, I had no idea.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:22 | 6749166 Hugh G Rection
Hugh G Rection's picture

No, we don't have a foreign policy.  Our bosses in the Knesset tell us who to kill for them.  

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:13 | 6749418 Sparehead
Sparehead's picture

I wonder what imaginary law he was referring to. 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:22 | 6749979 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

The old "It is against the law to do what I tell you not to do" law.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:55 | 6749047 Surviver22
Surviver22's picture

War is coming! Obama will not finish his second term! Current Events Linked to Ancient Biblical Prophecy!

http://motivationdose.com/is-america-babylon/

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:15 | 6749144 SMG
SMG's picture

What you are doing is dangerous because a planned war is coming (unless the Globalists get overthrown) and most here in the US are not ready for it.  So when your prediction doesn't happen in the timeframe you said people will say "See there's no war coming"   If you look at the current interactions between the US and Russia/China, which will be the combatants in the next war, you can see the stage being set.  Russia and China have also intentionally been built up militarily with many new advanced ships, planes, and weapon systems coming online in the 2020s with most likely early to mid 2020s being when the war starts. Most likely the trigger point for the war will be the invation of S. Korea by N. Korea, which explains why N. Korea gets to stay around.  So enjoy the next few years, quietly prepare, and get you and yours through the war, after which it's over things will finally start getting better. (See japan post WWII) 

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 20:47 | 6751455 Joe A
Joe A's picture

Is America Babylon?

It is Rome for sure!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:55 | 6749048 whitelivesmatter
whitelivesmatter's picture

Texting while driving.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 12:56 | 6749052 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

They were shipping it to Ebay. The government just found out the SPR liquidation would not bring in enough $$.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:06 | 6749063 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

You think that driver had to change his underwear after rear-ending that thing? By the way, Fonz if you're out there, that's probably one of the nuclear missiles that Obama is working so hard to "protect" you Manhattanites from. Duck and cover bitch!

 

 

 

https://youtu.be/rgl2NL_tKcQ

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 17:40 | 6750146 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

Shit happened...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:02 | 6749085 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

Luckily the cheap Chinese chips in the warhead prevented it from exploding.  Only 7099 other nuclear weapons in the US arsenal.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:01 | 6749086 SteveNYC
SteveNYC's picture

Texting while following a nuke....I'd put money on it.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:02 | 6749088 semperfi
semperfi's picture

"Trash Can Man" sighting !   (The Stand)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:51 | 6749863 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Bath House=Randall Flagg.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:23 | 6749988 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

Waiting for the "Hand of God" to intervene.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:02 | 6749089 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Real estate values will skyrock in the area. Very save neighbourhoods.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:05 | 6749098 dirty dolphin
dirty dolphin's picture

.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:12 | 6749126 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Good point.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:05 | 6749101 Baa baa
Baa baa's picture

Shit happens...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:06 | 6749105 supersajin
supersajin's picture

"Keeping us safe"!!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:07 | 6749106 CoolidgeLives
CoolidgeLives's picture

There only thing wrong with this video is that it wasn't filmed in front of Mr. Hussien Obama's home.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:16 | 6749111 Cardinal Fang
Cardinal Fang's picture

I guess thats why they have to practice...Lol, is that a 'Have a nice day' smiley face spare tire cover on the last vehicle?

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:11 | 6749402 CharlieMike
CharlieMike's picture

No it says "Nuke ahead stay back 500 miles"

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:09 | 6749113 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

The Big One, for You. [/Trashcan Man, The Stand]

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:10 | 6749117 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Interesting.

 

That sign on the side of the truck saying, "big mofo fucking nuke in here" really gives it away.

 

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:18 | 6749152 Lostinfortwalton
Lostinfortwalton's picture

This scene would be too over-the-top for a "Dr. Strangelove" remake. To go full-on third world they need to mount the machine guns on the vehicles and have the gomers waving them about.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:12 | 6749124 MadVladtheconquerer
MadVladtheconquerer's picture

Yaaa, I'm sure the warhead is designed to explode on a hair trigger too.  NOT!

The "collision" looked like it occurred at speeds wi/ the tolerances of the bumper/skirt of the impacting vehicle.

Nothing to see here.  Move along.  In other news, Russia's aerospace follies continue:

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2015/11/04/south-sudan-plane-crash/

http://www.reuters.com/article/2015/11/04/us-mideast-crisis-syria-jet-id...

In these cases, the collision did not occur at speeds or attitudes wi/ the tolerances of the airframe

of the impacting vehicle.

 

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:22 | 6749167 Maxter
Maxter's picture

Obviously the nuke wasn't going to explode.  The video is simply interesting for the comedy value of the event.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:53 | 6749329 Johnny Horscaulk
Johnny Horscaulk's picture
'Super Strypi' rocket disintegrates 1 minute after launch

The US Air Force has confirmed that its 'Super Strypi' sounding, or research, rocket has broken up on launch as its booster gained excessive rotation, destroying the vehicle a minute after lift-off.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:17 | 6749680 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

They had to make something cheap fail since they spent 99% of that program's budget on whores... Rinse repeat

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:14 | 6749136 highly illogical
highly illogical's picture

The guy with the camera actually caused this (actually the cop trying to tell him he couldn't film).  The two lead trucks were slowing because this dumbass cop was stopping in the road and and the guy behind the truck wasn't paying attention.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:35 | 6749239 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

Have you ever driven in any sort of convoy? (Military, Diplomatic, Bankster... anything more serious than a tailgating tard convoy... even the dumbest of the dumb in Iraq generally avoided anything that stupid despite such "distractions" as IEDs exploding.)   

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:14 | 6749138 1stepcloser
1stepcloser's picture

Broken Arrow...Broken Arrow

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:23 | 6749160 wisefool
wisefool's picture

John Travolta to his evil minions: "Could you PLEASE stop firing automatic weapons at the Nuclear Weapons?!?!?!"

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:16 | 6749146 farflungstar
farflungstar's picture

women drivers I tells ya

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:19 | 6749154 The Magus
The Magus's picture

You rock. I laughed my ass off.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:21 | 6749164 spankfish
spankfish's picture

Crash test dummies?

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:35 | 6749238 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

"Mmm mmm mmm mmm."

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:25 | 6749182 kaboomnomic
kaboomnomic's picture

Looks like inbred drunken hillbillies driving that truck. Hey billy!! Your sisters waiting here!! Gawd...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:26 | 6749185 4 wheel drift
4 wheel drift's picture

the 'government' efficiency in full display....

along with the growing police state from the fascists in power....

 

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:26 | 6749187 Rubbish
Rubbish's picture

Eastern Montana was leveled today when a deer crossed the road.

 

Gold Bitchez....I pick up pennies

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:54 | 6749334 Rubbish
Rubbish's picture

Congress has thoroughly investigated the matter, offering the entire State of Montana now to either Abe (Plenty Yen) to Host the 2020 Summer Olympics or Beijing's Hot Money for the 2022 Winter Games. Keeping with the whole it's perfectly safe. Japan and China are now in talks to modernize the State to reflect temporary and permanent housing for their citizens.

 

Gold Bitchez....I pick up pennies

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:26 | 6749999 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

I would have liked to have seen Eastern Montana.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:29 | 6749202 The Magus
The Magus's picture

Why would a nuke go off because it is shaken? The device needs electrical initiation.

Jeeezus guys. You should know better.

:)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:25 | 6749721 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

You don't watch enough cartoons.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:32 | 6749221 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Please don't text & drive.

Thank you for choosing ...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:32 | 6749224 yogibear
yogibear's picture

The military actually dropped a nuke without the trigger.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:32 | 6749225 Glass Seagull
Glass Seagull's picture

 

 

THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:35 | 6749228 silverer
silverer's picture

You'll have to hit the truck harder that.  Then nobody leaves the scene of the accident.  For about an eight mile radius. LMAO.  Actually, we all realize how many safeguards are in place against accidental detonation.  And those guys responsible for ensuring the safety mechanisms were probably at least as careful as that driver, right? (LMAO again).

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:20 | 6749429 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

My understanding from my dad's experience in the 70's that the warheads and the detonators are not transported together... They travel days/weeks apart...  

Plus you could put a fully assembled one on top of a pile of bombs and they explosion would only give you a dirty bomb - the thing still wouldn't go off... 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:34 | 6749234 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

The bigger story here is the police once again knowingly violating a person's Constitutional rights.  You know, the ones he took an oath to protect.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:15 | 6751589 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

They hate us for our perceived freedums

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:34 | 6749235 herkomilchen
herkomilchen's picture

This is why a monopoly under absolutely no constraints and answerable to no one is the last type of entity you want safeguarding a nuclear weapon.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:39 | 6749259 Manipulism
Manipulism's picture
Your Overlords demand: Israel orders aircraft carrier as part of US military aid package Israel has provided the United States with a list of weapons that it would like to have available as part of the US aid package, Israel’s Yedioth Ahronoth revealed yesterday.

According to the newspaper the list included a modern aircraft carrier and a squadron of F-15 aircrafts as well as material assistance to support Israel’s anti-ballistic missile system, Arrow 3.

According to the newspaper Israeli officials have asked for these weapons during closed-door meetings with US officials attended by Defence Minister Moshe Ya'alon and US Secretary of Defence Ashton Carter in Washington.

The list of arms exceeded the maximum assistance provided by the United States each year, amounting to nearly $3 billion, therefore it has been referred to US President Barack Obama before Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s visit to the White House scheduled for next week, the paper reported.

 

https://www.middleeastmonitor.com/news/americas/22086-israel-orders-airc...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:42 | 6749280 _ConanTheLibert...
_ConanTheLibertarian_'s picture

Too bad the nuke didn't explode on the spot or took off to Russia.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:43 | 6749283 okyoureabeast
okyoureabeast's picture

Whoop de dee,

 

Bomb is going to go "boom" because someone rear ended it. It's better to have no news than lame news on a slow day...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:52 | 6749321 Turdy Brown
Turdy Brown's picture

"luv u 2 hony but i have 2 stp txtng, thnk i just reer endd  trk carryng a nuke!"

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 13:59 | 6749344 SSRI Junkie
SSRI Junkie's picture

"Caught On Tape: U.S. Army Jeep Rear-Ends A Nuke"

 

was bath-house barry driving or reggie..they both have a lot of rear-enders  (bad joke, i know)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:05 | 6749383 autofixer
autofixer's picture

Has anyone checked on the photographer to see if he has been disappeared?   

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:11 | 6749409 Sparehead
Sparehead's picture

I realize the term Jeep is being used loosly here but I don't believe those are any kind of standard military vehicle. perhaps someone here recognizes them? They look like a 4WD version of a civilian armored truck, not unlike a Brinks truck. You'd think the drivers would be a notch above Gomer Pile, but apparently not.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 20:37 | 6751405 Joe A
Joe A's picture

Maybe they came out of a workshop in Syria or Iraq.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:13 | 6749416 Conax
Conax's picture

Talk about funny- In the AF I was in the line truck out near the revetments where our 'alert birds' were parked, ready to go forth and wreak mayhem, loaded for bear.

A bb stacker (Weapons handlers) had hung a nuke on a pylon incorrectly. They started her up at dawn and was getting ready to taxi back when it just fell off with a CLANK.

Everyone froze and pissed themselves for a second. Some of them ran, like, a hundred feet might make all the difference!

;)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:16 | 6749426 cheech_wizard
cheech_wizard's picture

You have to wonder if they actually perform vibration and drop tests on those suckers... :)

 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:03 | 6749608 Conax
Conax's picture

There is a whole series of safeties and interlocks that have to be enabled before one can actually detonate, like altitude switches and velocity switches.

We had an Aim-7 A/A missile fire off a pylon and go tearing across the ramps, but it didn't have the altitude to detonate. That was really dangerous.

Scary stuff when it happens.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:12 | 6749658 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

My dad worked for LTV aerospace in 70s... They outfitted a bunch of C130s as close air support gunships late during Vietnam which later became the AC130. The first bunch of 5 were flown over in late 72 to Laos. The Laotians had never seen them and shot up 3 of the 5 as they came in to land during the first transport... Two were so shot up they never flew again. Everyone survived - my dad was on the 4th plane which landed ok... He has some great stories about those missions... 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:17 | 6749428 Sparehead
Sparehead's picture

Was there a school desk within 100 feet to hide under?

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:32 | 6749455 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

My dad was loadmaster on a bird in the 70s that accidentally dropped a live one on a practice range in texas. It just fell off... And made a big dent in the ground... So it must happen more than we realize...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:14 | 6749421 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

I'd recon warheads and not an actual missile....

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:23 | 6749449 Redhotfill
Redhotfill's picture

IT'S NOT AN ARMY TRUCK, IT IS AIR FORCE SECURITY TARDS.  I wish I knew who took the video as I know a good lawyer in the Great Falls area.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:17 | 6751594 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

He probably needs a good undertaker by now...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:25 | 6749456 PrimalScream
PrimalScream's picture

Yes we have a Penalty Clause for bad drivers.

POOF !!!  You're vaporized !! 

:-)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:26 | 6749466 my_nym
my_nym's picture

Not that bad, the US has nearly nuked itself a number of times.

 

And now that Jewish influenced diversity police are actively discriminating against European Americans, it may be that African pygmies will be hired to police the nukes.  Who knows!  (But only if they want to cut their penises off, etc.  Because that's kosher.)

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:36 | 6749498 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

Wow - we can't even get one lighthearted thread done without bringing up Israel...

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 19:01 | 6750844 PoasterToaster
PoasterToaster's picture

Never forget.  America is Israel's bitch for some reason.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:28 | 6751657 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

Ok we can keep it lighthearted.

A naked rabbi runs out of a burning brothel with a boner and smacks into a wall. What did he scream?

"Ahhhh my nose"

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:28 | 6749472 rejected
rejected's picture

Probably part of the next cache of weapons to be dropped in the middle of the Syrian desert.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:37 | 6749499 BarkingCat
BarkingCat's picture

Exceptional!!!

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:38 | 6749501 Stud Duck
Stud Duck's picture

Hell boys, I live in an area where they had the same minute man missles. They crashed one at a I-70 and 65 junction, had one smuggled off base for a while, I partied with the missle heads in college. they were a bunch of acid eating, pot smoking animals. Also on the wierd side. I have more stories than this sace can provide of simular stories! lso have a bunch on the B-2 bunch, but that a new time and another story for another time..

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:46 | 6749843 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

At LTV in Dallas in '69 they were working on a new magnesium mount for some system in a C130. They were milling a big brick (100kg) when they lost coolant and it ignited... Burned for 3 days and left an 8ft hole through reinforced concrete in the hangar... Nearly melted the entire thing down. They had 2 10ft exhaust fans sucking out the heat that melted about every 30 mins... My dad was responsible for the milling machine that malfunctioned. My sister was born in the middle of it so he wasn't there to be ripped for it...  

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:38 | 6749502 cigarEngineer
cigarEngineer's picture

No surprise here. The military is 95% full of people who have no marketable skills and joined because they were unemployed. The other 5% are psychopathic true-believers.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 14:57 | 6749576 BarkingCat
BarkingCat's picture

Close but not exactly. There is probably 10% useful and intelligent human beings and the rest breaks down into various categories that you would not want dating your
daughter

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:12 | 6749660 Conax
Conax's picture

In the 1970s, a kid that got good grades, graduated high school, went out looking for work in the midwestern rustbelt, took a crappy job, got laid off, tried again, and again, and finally joins the service.

Happened all the time, that's how I ended up in the service.  I learned a lot, saw both sides of the world. Never kilt noone except 2 mig pilots before and during the Saigon baby lift.

My F-4s shot them down. I ran the radar calibration docks and had aligned them just purrrfect.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:30 | 6749754 Sivad UK
Sivad UK's picture

Conax you, my dad and his buddies would love swapping stories around a big fire with plenty of good whiskey...

My uncle was a Huey pilot flying hot S&R missions... Shot down 6 times... 4 tours... He has one helluva limp and a hatred for the VA but he has come to embrace the deeds over the results and is a pretty happy guy now...

Signed,

A guy who grew up in the shadows of Ft Rucker and Eglin AFB... 

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:04 | 6749615 arby63
arby63's picture

F uck you. They would eat your lunch on a math test an english test and a man test. Especially a man test. Go f uck yourself you troll f ucking internet warrior.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 15:21 | 6749698 BarkingCat
BarkingCat's picture

No they would not. I was in the army and have first hand knowledge of the caliber of individuals that it attracts.
Based upon the test that we were given when I went through basic training I am smarter than 97% of them.
In my company 3 of us scored high enough to be offered officer prep school, which upon completion guaranteed entry into West Point. That is 3 out of over 140 men.
Most of the other guys were not very bright, definitely below average. That was the army. The marines on the other hand are even dumber.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 16:52 | 6750093 Sparehead
Sparehead's picture

Ya, I'm calling bullshit on all of that. The test you're probably referring to is the ASVAB and it's a vocational test not an intelligence test. Also what the hell is "officer prep school"? That doesn't exist. If you enlisted you wouldn't get guaranteed anything to do with being an officer, and you take the ASVAB prior to enlisting. That's not to mention you'd go to OCS not West Point. That's Officer Candidate School, where you go to become an officer, assuming you already had a degree and didn't attend an academy or ROTC. West Point is a very selective military academy (college). 

All that said, sure there's dumbasses in the military. But you can find them everywhere. If the military excels at anything compared to the general population, it's in the number of assholes you'll find there. Though again you'll find them everywhere as well.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:18 | 6751602 BarkingCat
BarkingCat's picture

You can call bullshit all you want.
The test you are referring to is given before you enlist.
Just because you are not aware of it does not mean it does not exist. Maybe it does not anymore it did when I was in.
It was (is ?) 9 month program.
And yes it was a way to get into West Point and not Officer Candidate School.
Yes West Point is indeed very selective. As far as I know the only other way to get into it was with a recommendation from your Senator, and they had a very limited number of those available.
I am not saying that I would have even made it through that nine months or West Point for that matter.
I actually did accept the offer and my CO never filed the paperwork. Following year it was too late as
there an age limit for entry into West Point, and I would have been past that.
However I never had any regrets over it.
I prefer living a free life.

Wed, 11/04/2015 - 21:35 | 6751685 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

I thought airforce academy was the only thing you can test high into and become a blue angel or whatever bullshit the recruiters were blown smoke about in my high school

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!