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Caption Contest: 2015's International Staring Championships Final
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O-bama: King me
Putin: Checkmate mother fucker.......
Why does it smell like piss? ;-)
Looney
Putin: What is this 'Mulligan' you speak of?
VP: Dude, you're like right in my face
SR: That's no way to talk to the president
VP: I was talking to you
You say There a Great Golf course in Crimea... Ok lets talk, tell me more...
Obobo: Do you have any 4's ?
Putin: Go Fish
Quick: Is Boris around? We need an official translation.
Obama: Do you think Stalin would have played or liked golf?
Putin: Het
Would you like anything else Mr. Putin?
O: Are you sure you want to fuck her?
P: Yes
O: Why?
P: I am a big Star Wars fan and I have a thing for apes.
All Putin has to do is laugh at him and he wins the contest. It is really that simple...
VP: Why do my vingers smell like your black monkey balls? Did I really drink that much wodka last night?
VP: My Russin paper covers baROCK every time!
VP: I have these many banannas. I will trade all of them for one poke at the Wookie.
These hands could just as easily be around your fucking neck
VP: You vill be my puppett vith or vithout these hands stuck up your ass!
"Yes Barack, but first you must pull my finger"...
How many eyes (intelligence services) do we have worldwide, and we can't seem to end this war? Meanwhile, ISIS has no problem selling $40 Million worth of oil per month. US and UK are trying to pass more draconian surveillance laws.
We gave targeting info to France so they could attack ISIS in Raqqa. So we had that information but weren't using it.
O: we should put Al Bhagdadi on Goldman Sachs board
P: you're a fucking idiot
Avitar says it all
Obummer: "Do you have any 8s?"
Putin: "Go Fish"
Putin: "I propose carrot and stick approach. You write Syria plans on carrot and stick in ass"
Deeds not Words, brother.
Obama: "God damn it, that little bastard keeps outsmarting us at every turn."
Putin: "I can read your mind asshole, and that's the first thing you've got right in the past 6 months."
And then you push "clock" again, and it's set.
Ooooooo
" Yes Barry, I have video of you and Reggie."
Putin: "....her fuckin' tits were out here man!"
Oboma: Tits? What are they?
"What's wrong, CHICKEN McFLY???"
Barry (thinking): He's so sexy and macho, I think I'm feeling a tingle up my leg. Wasn't there a guy like him that hung out at Man's World? Hmmm...
Putin (thinking): My God, I can't believe they sent this empty suit!
"Stop eating the "chocolate" men, Barry. It is a plastic chess set."
Obama: I was recruited by the KGB before you were.
Putin: No, I KGB before you.
Valerie: Boys, boys, stop it. I put both your names on the list of prospects at the same time.
Obama: But it was alphabetical, right?
putin: "YA pokupayu bol'she zolota i prodazhe bumagu vy fudgepacking anus - lyubovnika"
translator: "i'm buying more gold and selling your paper you fudgepacking anus-lover"
what i wish i could hear. " the zionazis are the problem. let's take them out. i'll provide your cover."
what putin is really saying in diplospeak. "if you fuck with me. i'll fuck you and your little butt boy, israel, up. keep being an asshole."
Putin: Barack if you manspread me one more time I'm going to cut it off.
Would have been a most opportune time for Putin to show his "strike first techniques,just like on the streets of St.P'burg's back in the day"
Classic
Another golden photo op wasted. Putin could have just reached across that table and bitch-slapped him.
He's doing that in Syria.
I'm sure he did...metaphorically.
"You heard me. You're a fucking dead man."
Okay, so let's make sure we have our plans straight. You act like you're incompetent, and I'll come in and "clean up the mess". Create enough global chaos and people will be clamoring for a NWO to come "save" them.
Putin: Yes, but can you hold your balls like "this"..
Good chance for a Putin head butt!
Should we decide with rock, paper, scissor?
Putin: "No, I don't want to go back to your place for a fucking nightcap."
no no the horsey goes 2 in 1 direction then one to either side
Putin: "Are you going to give me my book back?"
but New England is undefeated and I've got their Super Bowl ring.
Da, I cleearly rolled a 17
and your armor rating is well below that,
and you have no more healing spells.
Putin: I hope you can 'talk' to the NY Attorney General to reconsider the banning of Draft Kings and Fan Duel.
Rock.
Paper.
Scissors.
Nuclear torpedo! I win!!
putin- I take dump legs are spread this far
obama- yea yea must folks do
rice- i haven't taken a dump in six months so I forget how far my legs are spread!
Putin: This is the next country we will take over.
Barry: No problem. So long as I get my "oil money" kickback deposit by 4pm today.
O. Its time to talk about my next reelection.
P. Not a chance, even I cant take another 4 years of your stupid ass.
Putin: Your move
Obama: But but but...I don't know how to play chess.
Barry: any 4's?
Putin: go fish
Putin: Geez, are there any grown-ups in the US government?
Oboma: No. LOL!. BWAHAHAHAAAHAAAA! Got you, Pootie-pants.
PUTIN: I am beeg man. You are leetle boy!"
(Russian scientist in my lab actually said this to a Dutch scientist.)
Lmfao that's hilarious.... a Dutch scientist.....
O: Is your Aircraft Carrier having Electrical and Control problems too?
P: Sunspots...look into it
My balls are this big
Bad Vlad: "And I can beat you in golf too."
Here is the differences:
1) The Kenyan takes orders and other things.
2) The Russian leader gives orders and other things.
Obama: We bombed some ISIS folks for a little while in Syria.
Putin: We kicked ass and took names on ISIS. Now they're afraid to show their faces in Syria.
Is that Michael next to Obama on the right?
No, it's our inept national security advisor.
Putin: Tell Magog, "The owl is in the barn."
Obama: Yes, massa.
Obama: Hey, Vlad, you want some of these cukes Michelle grew in the White House garden?
Putin: Nyet. No thanks, Barrie. Like you, they give me bad case of gas.
Oh, and remember, Putin does speak English. He's just not fluent. He almost certainly knows colloquial English cuss words. Whereas Barrie would have to ask what "Yob tvoyu mat!" ("You motherf-ker!") means.
Putin:! Would you like me show you how I wrestle beeeg bear?
Barry: as long as you take off your shirt and we can cuddle afterwards!
Putin: Cuddle? What a fag!
Your ass in in these hands.
I explain Syria if you explain bulge in wife's dress, da?
Putin's playing chess, and Obama's playing Candy Land.
Putin: Seriously you married that woman?
Barry: Ha, I finally beat you. That's not a woman!
Putin: Yes I know!
Obama: Mr Putin, the Ouija board won't work unless you put your hands on it
Putin: Let me tell you how it will be.
Obama: O.K.?
As a side note:
http://dcwhispers.com/putin-laughs-off-obama-at-g20-summit-hes-a-child-h...
If true VJ pushed for photo opp.
Apparently there are very few people who take him seriously any more. Hong Kong needs to be careful of American Democrats fleeing to it.
I suggest increasingg land fills.
Obama: "Think about it, remove your air support and let us handle this operation. We will defeat ISIS. And we can remove those sanctions. You win either way, Putin."
Putin: "Very few understand how difficult it is to refrain, time and time again, from nuking your debt riddled Wall Street or just hacking your ponzi banks back to the stone age. Please, Mr President, can I call you nigger, like in the Hollywood movies?"
Obama: "Only if I can call you Vlad the Impaler."
Vlad the Impaler: "Yo' Nigger: The Buck Stops Here."
Obama to translator: "What did he say, I can't understand him again."
Translator to Putin in Russian: "The peace of the entire world is in your hands and the US don't get it. Cameron and Hollande are the same bitches. They really think they run the show."
Vlad the Impaler: "O-K Mr President... You have 24 hours to remove all NATO forces from Syria."
TO BE CONTINUED
Obama Assad must go!
Putin Nigga please!
"Bishops don't move that way."
Putin: You didn't attack ISIS for all these years because you didnt want to violate their 'safe space'??? What the hell is a 'safe space' ?
pick-a-boo