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"Panic"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Investors are panic-buying stocks, panic-selling bonds, and panic-pumping-dumping-and-pumping crude this morning...

 

 

The machines are in charge...

 

What happens next?

 

With humans on the sidelines and algos in charge, this week with The Fed and quad witching should be 'eventful'.

 

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Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:43 | 6925517 Bernoulli
Bernoulli's picture

Insanity!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:47 | 6925542 FinalEvent
FinalEvent's picture

Save the world, buy bitcoin

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:50 | 6925553 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Volatility bitches.

<It's what's for dinner.>

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:53 | 6925578 pods
pods's picture

I think they're in the machine equivalent of the vinegar strokes.

Get outta the way.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:54 | 6925589 J S Bach
J S Bach's picture

"Panic Greed" is such an odd combination of words, but it perfectly describes the selfish state of mind of our times.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:59 | 6925608 Bernoulli
Bernoulli's picture

Yes exactly. Like the "animal spirits" coming out in a dark shady gambling joint...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:24 | 6925741 kralizec
kralizec's picture

I love the acrid smell of panic in the morning.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:51 | 6925563 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

lol. I'd say one of the worst reasons to buy bitcoin is to see anonymous bitcoin fans on ZH writing "Save the world, buy bitcoin"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:54 | 6925590 Money Counterfeiter
Money Counterfeiter's picture

QE IV $1.2 tr.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:00 | 6925849 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Your screen avatar should be a picture that is Alan Greenspan melting into Ben Bernake which then melts into Janet Yellen, then back into Greenspan to do it all over again.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:26 | 6926114 comrade rally monkey
comrade rally monkey's picture

You must be pessimistic. 4-5T is next.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:55 | 6925594 pods
pods's picture

Bitcoin:  The official currency of the Darknet, aka Mos Eisley.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:00 | 6925616 bamawatson
bamawatson's picture

buy bitcoin, so every single transaction you make shall be indelibly recorded for time immemorial

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:08 | 6925639 . . . _ _ _ . . .
. . . _ _ _ . . .'s picture

With smartphones, GPS in cars, NSA bulk data collection, and bitcoin, who needs RFIDs?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:48 | 6925913 Deacon Frost
Deacon Frost's picture

Agree 'SOS'.

But please convert your Morse Code back to Roman.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:36 | 6926167 ali-ali-al-qomfri
ali-ali-al-qomfri's picture

hugh, I thought it was a Fukushima Smiley face,

you know radiation is good for you

and good for you too.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 14:33 | 6926706 . . . _ _ _ . . .
. . . _ _ _ . . .'s picture

Not sure I can change my name.

Fukushima smiley face! lol

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 13:33 | 6926398 Grandad Grumps
Grandad Grumps's picture

Pretty sure the ultimate goal of chipping people is to be able to control their thoughts and actions, not just monitor them. I got this info directly from Ann Droyd and Sy Borg.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:57 | 6925599 Bernoulli
Bernoulli's picture

So true.

It was probably a typo. It should say "Save the world, buy a certificate to minimize your CO2 footprint"

or "Save your ass, buy bitcoin"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:57 | 6925602 FinalEvent
FinalEvent's picture

Lol, you rather have a respectable person like Ben Bernanke tell you to buy dollars?

Hahahaha

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 13:01 | 6926255 Rabbi Chaim Cohen
Rabbi Chaim Cohen's picture

Hahahaha????

We would choose neither my son...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:16 | 6925694 XXL66
XXL66's picture

Buy EURO

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:00 | 6925611 Hitlery_4_Dictator
Hitlery_4_Dictator's picture

Everytime the markets mini-crashes and ten goes back to where it was, the eCONomy dies jsut a bit more. The economy is so disconnected to the "market" now that I would argue it dosen't matter how high the stocks go anymore. 

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:57 | 6926240 1033eruth
1033eruth's picture

You can always tell when an "investment" is of tulip bulb quality when suckers get on economic boards and constantly tout their "ground floor" investment.  

Its MLM at its best!  GO SUCKERS! 

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:49 | 6925550 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Oil-House Reach!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:01 | 6925618 CharlieMike
CharlieMike's picture

Did you serve in 9th psyop bn?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:49 | 6925552 jmeyer
jmeyer's picture

This is the PUMP to be followed by the DUMP.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:52 | 6925571 Bernoulli
Bernoulli's picture

I think so, too.

But this rollercoaster ride is taking its toll on me...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 13:03 | 6926266 Rabbi Chaim Cohen
Rabbi Chaim Cohen's picture

Indeed, but time can be a great commodity when needed...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:20 | 6925693 ThirteenthFloor
ThirteenthFloor's picture

+1. Agree.

"It would take a computerized Vulcan mind to buy right now"
/creative license

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:51 | 6925568 BullyBearish
BullyBearish's picture

At this point, it's all about the CHURN...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:24 | 6925742 Wannabe_Oracle
Wannabe_Oracle's picture

This just in from CNBC: Raymond James Chief Investment Strategist Jeffrey Saut said Tuesday that stock investors should get read for a "rip your face off-type rally."

 

read == ready...?


Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:28 | 6925769 Wannabe_Oracle
Wannabe_Oracle's picture

Does rally typically mean upward movement..?

 

ral·ly

1.  To call together for a common purpose; assemble:

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:43 | 6925877 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Yes. Lots of prices up at the same time.

If you don't have the vocabulary, what chance do you have of ever getting to be an Oracle, Wannabe_?

Wed, 12/16/2015 - 12:42 | 6930880 Wannabe_Oracle
Wannabe_Oracle's picture

Sadly you missed my point - thanks for playing though.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:28 | 6925771 Angel_Eyes
Angel_Eyes's picture

Check this legitimate ways to mak? money from home, working on your own time and being your own boss... Join the many successful people who have already used the system. Only reliable internet connection needed, no prior experience neccessary, that's why where are here. Start here... www.wallstreet34.com

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:44 | 6925525 Id fight Gandhi
Id fight Gandhi's picture

No hike rally

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:45 | 6925533 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

*lowers helmet*

"Keep buying assholes!"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:50 | 6925559 RadioFlyer
RadioFlyer's picture

Do you stack them or load them on a stick?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:45 | 6925892 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Or maybe in a string or necklace?

Do you call them "dead ringers?"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:46 | 6925534 Id fight Gandhi
Id fight Gandhi's picture

Natural gas is notably crashing still

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:55 | 6925593 _ConanTheLibert...
_ConanTheLibertarian_'s picture

Inverse blowup

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:27 | 6925763 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Its bank subsidiars trying to build more NG units in the PJM/MISO foot prints.  The banks are crushing NG and saying "see you need more NG plants and we will build them", and once that is done, the price of NG will be >$3 causing everyone electric bills to be lollargagers large.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:46 | 6925535 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Buy all the things!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:50 | 6925555 ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

And sell all the other things!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 13:55 | 6926497 NihilistZero
NihilistZero's picture

nmewn, I need to write a script that automatically up votes you on any page I view. You're total LoLz or total thought provoking any time you post. I salute you!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:47 | 6925543 The Merovingian
The Merovingian's picture

The monkeys are back to flinging their shit again, wee!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:50 | 6925561 GartmansTaint
GartmansTaint's picture

They call that "Chimpin"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:07 | 6925632 unrulian
unrulian's picture

you sir, have a terrible avatar

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:12 | 6926050 matinee55
matinee55's picture

taint not!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:47 | 6925544 TradingTroll
TradingTroll's picture

HYG is up about 2% right now. Selling bonds? What?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:00 | 6925615 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

High Yield often acts more like stock than it does bonds.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:47 | 6925546 NEOSERF
NEOSERF's picture

Tomorrow down 300...feeling like the run up to 2008 with those 600 pt swings...Fed is in a box...lose face if DON'T tighten but really shouldn't with collapsing demand and market will punish them for doing it and draining even more liquidity while bludgeoning EM>..

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:51 | 6925569 RadioFlyer
RadioFlyer's picture

A good BOHICA requires a lot of up and down movement.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:48 | 6925914 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

And some in/out too.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:53 | 6925575 Mark Mywords
Mark Mywords's picture

You left a zero off of that number. Down 3000 tomorrow.

So I have dreamt it, so it should come to pass.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:53 | 6925953 gdogus erectus
gdogus erectus's picture

Ok, Mark. We will watch tomorrow. You will either be a hero or flame out like the rest of us have making predictions over the years.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:06 | 6926028 mtndds
mtndds's picture

I bet the market wil rally hard upwards tomorrow to inspire confidence with the FED.  Those fuckers at the FEDERAL RESERVE have already planned on all the possible scenarios to keep the market propped up tomorrow.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:11 | 6926047 matinee55
matinee55's picture

this, as usual has been preordaned!  now buy sheeple & prepare for the next fleecing er shearing!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:54 | 6925582 gmak
gmak's picture

Given the season, I don't think that the FED wil lhave to drain as much liquidity as everyone thinks initially. However, in the New Year, it will be a different story. I'm anticipating a drop in the frist two weeks of January.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:54 | 6925584 nmewn
nmewn's picture

2-4% round trip swings are completely rational now, absolutely normal, Mr.Dow is currently taking all his prescribed medications, so no worries.

(Whistling past the graveyard...lol)

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:49 | 6925920 matinee55
matinee55's picture

with unlimited fiat paper & being unaudited, Fed can have this up 600 tomorrow if required.  3rd mandate! -save obunga & the demonrats

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 14:03 | 6926546 NihilistZero
NihilistZero's picture

Stop with the partisan bullshit. As if Greenspan didn't act to save GWB and the GOP asshats last decade...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:50 | 6925557 Lorca's Novena
Lorca&#039;s Novena's picture

I for one welcome our algorithmic overlords...

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:55 | 6925591 Rainman
Rainman's picture

^ smart

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:58 | 6925606 Brooks_Orpington
Brooks_Orpington's picture

Hail Ants.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:51 | 6925565 cpnscarlet
cpnscarlet's picture

I think its time for the most "counter-intuitive" move out there (as far as TPTB are concerned -

BUY SILVER HAND OVER FIST!!!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:53 | 6925577 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

"investors..."  LMFAO!!!  Please, words like this and others such as "collateral", "markets", and "value" no longer mean what you think they do (for anyone who has been around 30+ years).

It's a fucking club for insider fraud/skimming.  For everyone else, it is a casino.  Do not bet what you cannot afford to lose.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:55 | 6925592 bnbdnb
bnbdnb's picture

U mad bro?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:57 | 6925601 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Elon Musk:

"The People need to strike back at the Machines. I just read a bunch of Fred Herbert. We're in Danger! Hiterry is designing a robot to contain her brain!"

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:10 | 6925663 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

Hope it's better looking than the current one.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 10:59 | 6925607 gmak
gmak's picture

And this is what you're up against.

 

21 year ol millionaire trader.   LMAO.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:00 | 6925612 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

PRC: "Here are our Contracts, Yanquis. Gold or War."
Comex: "Uhh, you won't take cash? If you read the Prospectus..."
"This is my Makarov racking. Get my Gold."

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:01 | 6925617 Eyeroller
Eyeroller's picture

Fed has to pump markets up in order to hike.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:02 | 6925620 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

"Is there No Man in the Kingdom with Liquidity?"
"No, sire. Here come the French."

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:02 | 6925622 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

What makes you think the fed will not just continue buying stocks instead of bonds? If you think they are suddenly becoming free market capitalists you have not been watching the last few years ok decades.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:06 | 6925625 Ban KKiller
Ban KKiller's picture

All I know is that those sister fuckers over at NSM and FIG are shitting their diapers. NSM off 60% for the year and their owner, FIG, off 30% for the year. 

NSM has so many seasoned criminal banksters on their board and in the company it was not hard to figure out that they were going nowhere. 

 

As long as I am slinging crap...."free" market down 275 for the week. No biggie, buy the dip....shits. 

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:08 | 6925630 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Had to stick the entire contents of my drugs cabinet up my ass to trade this shit today.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:09 | 6925644 ChargingHandle
ChargingHandle's picture

TRON runs this shit

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:09 | 6925654 Goldbugger
Goldbugger's picture

Can't find the article but China Daily showed yesterday that they have been fudging the GDP numbers for the last 3 years.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:22 | 6925719 Arnold
Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:46 | 6925897 matinee55
matinee55's picture

Kudo's to China for comming clean. Now the FED & the Mafia GOV????

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 13:11 | 6926301 Arnold
Arnold's picture

You can take this to the Chicom bank of your choice and deposit it.

They are not coming clean.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:15 | 6925691 madcows
madcows's picture

I can't imagine what it will be like when robots are running everything.  Up Down, Up Down, Up Down.

 

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:42 | 6925865 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

To us it will look like a straight line.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:23 | 6925734 CHoward
CHoward's picture

Then tomorrow should be one helluva awesome day! 

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:30 | 6925784 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

there is nothing more bullish for stawks than the first rate hike in 7 fucking years.

 

WHAT A MOTHER FUCKING JOKE!!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:47 | 6925902 blown income
blown income's picture

Glad I don't have a Ira or 401k to worry about

 

Just whether I default on the cheap credit before the crash or hold and service until after the crash.....

 

What's a serf to do....

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:47 | 6925908 loveyajimbo
loveyajimbo's picture

I wish the 'roids that post 'Work from home and make thousands" horseshit would grow a pair, get a tin cup and sit their douchebag asses in front of a local Walgreens like all self-respecting BUMS do.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 11:55 | 6925970 _SILENCER
_SILENCER's picture

Is it possible for HFT machines to freak out and panic?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:10 | 6926038 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Harmonic resonance is my running hypothesis. The unnatural algo rhythms trading the system together may very well cause a collapse. I am taking a phenomenon from the physical world and applying it to this electronic one, but I don't see why it could not happen.  

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:21 | 6926098 J Jason Djfmam
J Jason Djfmam's picture

A superheterodyne market crash.

I love it!

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 16:33 | 6927224 kiwimail
kiwimail's picture

Similar to high speed wobbles on a kids bike.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:04 | 6926019 CitizenPete
CitizenPete's picture

Thank Joe Hovah that the banking industry is showing improvement!

 

"As the U.S. banking industry continues to show improvement and the number of bank failures steadily declines, we remain focused on fulfilling the responsibilities of our mission while prudently managing costs," FDIC Chairman Martin Gruenberg said.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:42 | 6926195 3rdWorldTrillionaire
3rdWorldTrillionaire's picture

I've always wondered -- what exactly is "panic-buying"?

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:44 | 6926202 3rdWorldTrillionaire
3rdWorldTrillionaire's picture

Never mind -- short covering, I wasn't thinking.

Tue, 12/15/2015 - 12:51 | 6926228 Solio
Solio's picture

Infestors rule!

 

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