Jim Cramer Is Too Busy To Think

Tyler Durden's picture

Submitted by Douglas Litowitz via HVST.com,

Jim Cramer of CNBC has a “vicious” schedule that allows only four hours of sleep, according to his recent interview with Business Insider.

He gets up at 3:45am. By 4:45am he has exercised (with a trainer), twittered, eaten, and starts working on a memo, then he goes to CNBC, meets with a CEO at 7:00am, then meets with his charitable trust, then is on television at 8:20am, doing conference calls at 10:10am, working on memos with his writers and setting up guests and segments, doing his actual show 4:00pm to 6:15pm, then he gets driven home at 6:30pm, where he allows himself an hour to eat supper and watch television, after which he works on his overnight memo till 11:00pm, and gets in bed by 11:30pm, only to start the next day at 3:45am. This schedule is pretty close to what he told Business Insider three years ago, when they reported that he worked “every single minute” from 2:47am to 11:00pm, losing weight during earnings season because he had no time for supper. Oh, he also owns an Inn and a bar. His description can be found here: http://hvst.co/1IY3gG1

Impressed? I’m not.

He has allotted himself zero time for deep contemplation of the type necessary for true insight. He is busy, busy, busy – as if busyness itself were a virtue.

I took one look at Cramer’s schedule and realized that it is anathema to producing any profound ideas. All of the great thinkers spend a lot of time doing nothing – at least from the outside perspective. Doing ‘nothing’ is what gives them space to generate ideas, that is, to think.

A few examples are in order.

Bodhidharma (the father of Chinese Buddhism) arrived at the Shaolin Temple and spent eight years staring at a wall. Every day, alone, staring at a wall. Jesus went alone into the wilderness for forty days. Einstein spent his afternoons staring out the window, imagining how gravity would feel to a worker falling off the building.

Deep thinkers are rarely media darlings and friends of the establishment. Socrates was sentenced to death; Rousseau was kicked around Europe and ended up alone on an island; Spinoza was excommunicated by the Jews and hounded by the Christians; Godel – perhaps the greatest logician since Aristotle – died of paranoid starvation after escaping from the Nazis and landing in Princeton, where he interrupted his immigration hearing to tell the judge there was a logical error in the U.S. Constitution.

Isn’t this a central message of The Big Short? That it takes outsiders, misfits, and contrarians to see the deeper trends in the markets, because they have no stake in perpetuating the party line.

This is my problem with Cramer: he has no time to think. He is so imbricated within the strictures of CNBC, so enamored of his guests, so genuflective and collegial that he has no critical distance to see the flaws of the very system of which he is a part.

People like Cramer who are so invested (literally and figuratively) in the current financial system are loathe to realize that it is farcical, that it is built on toothpicks, that the corporate and government numbers are cooked, that the ‘recovery’ is a joke, that the ‘markets’ are rigged by central banks, that wrongdoing is epidemic, that there are no longer any rational connections between prices and fundamentals, that we have passed beyond reality into fantasyland.  

It would cost Cramer his job to admit this carnivalesque madness, to have the courage of several recent hedge fund managers who returned money to their clients and admitted that the financial system is no longer a ‘market’ in any meaningful sense.

And so there he sits, an indefatigable lighthouse, imperious and self-righteous in his conviction that everything is still rational.

Cramer is the embodiment of a society awash in information but starved in meaning. Busy, busy, busy, spouting out figures, reciting numbers, giving opinions on consumer products, oil, geopolitics, central banking, fundamentals, technicals -- but to what end?

Cramer’s function is symbolic: he embodies the Horatio Alger Myth that a balding everyman trading out of a rec room full of tchotchkes can be a ‘winner’ with some good old-fashioned elbow grease and four hours of sleep. And why does he do it? Because he wants you – dear reader and dear watcher – to get rich!

People rarely ask themselves why a fortuneteller lives in trailer park instead of living in a mansion by getting rich betting on sporting events. Similarly, most people who watch CNBC don’t ask why Cramer eschews being a billionaire trader so he can be a guidance counselor to day traders.

Busyness doesn’t make Cramer great; on the contrary, it’s what prevents him from being great.

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Jethro's picture

If I could put a curse on him, I'd make the skin on his head shrivelly like a ball sack.

hedgeless_horseman's picture



Cocaine is a helluva drug.

Minions's picture

He's too busy with the propaganda that turns Arab Refugees into Terrorists and Rapists >> http://bit.ly/1MwVzrs

Herd Redirection Committee's picture

I thought slavery was abolished, along with child labor?  Then again, debt slavery is still alive and well...

Slave: noun

a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them.

a person who works very hard without proper remuneration or appreciation.

a person who is excessively dependent upon or controlled by something.

"the poorest people of the world are slaves to the banks"

a device, or part of one, directly controlled by another.

Slave: verb

work excessively hard

Mr.Sono's picture

he thinks, I thought he just bullshits.

aVileRat's picture

Nah, Jim's a pure technician who rides a very strong cult of personality within DNC circles and pretends to do fundamental analysis pre-show. Thw shows themself are pure homage to the 'dial in' shows of the 60-90's which used to sell pump schemes & tippers.  With the advent of social media and trader apps, even the shoeshine boy is now a energy & ETF market expert. Which speaks volumes for market depth and market education that in turn forces Cramer "Mad Money" to cater to audience investment requests. Its an iterative circle of flippers that is pretty much all the retail market knows & thinks they are capable of understanding. 

In Jim's defense: How could one possibly teach gordon growth, psychological breaks or PEG in 30 min in a fun & innovative manner, let alone liquidity topography? You can't. Bitches want quick analysis and made for TV comedy and when they see the absolute return drawdowns they view it as the fault of Jim and not their momo investment style, which Jim encourages.

Deviation from the format was tried and it failed pretty bad. Those who actually want to move deeper into Pro territory have ZH, Wizards and a whole host of investment literature that is learned by your sales desk or self interest which CNBC could not hope to replace without a radical retooling of their mainstream appeal back to their roots in the 80's (think the PTJ 1987 crash segment).





El Oregonian's picture

Jim's nothing more than a circus clown carney...

Occident Mortal's picture

He is off his tits every day.

He's a salary man.

Richard Chesler's picture

Cocaine and bankster cock.

You might as well take advice from Zippy the clown.



Fish Gone Bad's picture

If he were any more evil he would have to either be a cartoon character or cancer.

lincolnsteffens's picture

The author says "he  has no critical distance to see the flaws of the very system of which he is a part."

Cramer is no dummy. He probably likes his celebrity status far more than any moral obligation to not destroy the uninformed. He is a paid media whore who likes to walk down the street and have people say "Hi Jim, listen to you all the time. Great Job! Can I get your autograph?" For that he has sold his soul.

I think the Devil bought him cheap.

OrangeJews's picture

What is he doing while being driven home?  Sounds like he's slacking... or jacking it to some AAPL charts.

Chuck Walla's picture

“It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it.”

- Upton Sinclair



LoneStarHog's picture

< Markets are more farcical

< Cramer is more farcical

sapioplex's picture

...shrivelly like a foreskin. More biblical (better wedding gift, too.)

RockRiver's picture

Cramer might be a lot of things but he's at least smart enough to get CNBC and a whole bunch of people to buy his shit and pay him well.

tunetopper's picture

We obviously need market reforms on the following: naked shorting, uptick rule, credit default swaps between counterparties where 20 or fewer parties make up 80+% of trading, publicly available derivatives net exposure on SIFI's incorporated in the Bank Stress Tests.  Offshore Assets not included in balance sheets that have Enron type trigger mechanisms aka QSPE

Dimons jock's picture

Why would any of this be good for the establishment? Jimbo would be hustiling blowjobs on Summit Avenue all day long while singing the Philadelphia Eagles fight song.

Clowns on Acid's picture
Thats how Hillary made 100MM.
algol_dog's picture
Workaholism: A Life Out of Balance -
Wulfkind's picture

Trump is the farcical clown version in politics.

Stroke's picture

You must belong to the cult of the Blue Team

scintillator9's picture

A better curse would be he gets to live the life of a Bangladesh ship breaker, or Chinese Foxconn worker, or Indonesian shrimp peeler, or someone in the Middle East dodging bullets just trying to survive another day, for each life he ruined on his way "to the top".




Jethro's picture

Maybe tastebuds in his asshole might be better?

mccvilb's picture

Thanks Scintillator9. The author of this revisionist BS write up on Cramer must be twelve years old. He talks about Cramer and the markets like they're legit. Straight from the horse's mouth - the video says it all.

booboo's picture

Um...no he's just a clown

neuronius's picture

a clown of the "ass" variety, perhaps?

Gregory Poonsores's picture
Gregory Poonsores (not verified) Jan 11, 2016 4:50 PM

Meh this is the crap they tell plebs so they continually work like dogs for master - hard work will get you there.


BlueStreet's picture

Pretty sure busyness isn't the only thing keeping him from being great.

buzzsaw99's picture

i thought he spent 12 hrs per day researching stock picks for the sheeple. i am so disillusioned. /s

RopeADope's picture

No, Jim Cramer is too stupid to think.

Jason T's picture

when I worked in manufaturing, the president of the company told me you work only about 2 hours a day ( I was just beggining as a manufaturing engineer) .. the rest of the time, you think and talk to people.  


GhostOfDiogenes's picture
GhostOfDiogenes (not verified) Jan 11, 2016 5:00 PM


I am lost.

Greed isn't good?

TheABaum's picture

Acquisitiveness is good, greed is just another human mania. 



Chippewa Partners's picture

He was up 24% a year for a decade.

Buying hot IPO's with commish was too easy!


TheABaum's picture

We're not awash in information, we're awash in data. Numbers, numbers everywhere, but context, meaning, significance and validity not to be found. 

Wile's picture

Correct.  As I tell those posting "seasonality" and such in a fully rigged market.

Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Disinformation, misinformation, propaganda, and information overload.  Top it off with outright censorship and you understand information control/flow in the 21st century.

Until I grasped disinformation, I couldn't make a lick of sense of most of the 'information' out there.  When I realized very little (if anything) out there is 100% truth, that was a momentous step.

unplugged's picture

in summary:  Jim Cramer is an "agent of the system"

Witch-king of Angmar's picture

Absolutely right. Unfortunately, all central banks, all governments, all brokerage firms, all banks, etc, are also agents of the system. And let's not leave out the mainstream news providers: CNN, Reuters, CNBC, USA Today, etc. Try and find any of the important stuff available on ZH on any of these providers.


ebworthen's picture

Carnival Barkers work pretty hard.

Cramer makes Carnies look bad.

tunetopper's picture

The sad thing is that Cramer and apparently CNBC / Comcast, think that people are actually listening to him. 

sunnyside's picture

Even sadder is that some are.

lordbyroniv's picture

My liberal friends think I am naive.

"Its always been this way" they say

I cant wait till they get punched in the face and lose some teeth.

Herd Redirection Committee's picture

If/when there is a crash, and the USD loses world reserve currency, never mind the turmoil, the toughest think will be not cracking a smile, and telling people 'I told you so..."