Anyone Using New York City Roads After 2:30pm Will Be Arrested

Tyler Durden's picture

Congratulations New Yorkers: moments ago not only did your local authorities ban all travel starting at 2:30pm...

  • CUOMO: PORT AUTHORITY ISSUED TRAVEL BAN ON G. WASHINGTON BRIDGE
  • CUOMO: PORT AUTHORITY ISSUED BAN ON LINCOLN, HOLLAND TUNNELS
  • CUOMO: PORT AUTHORITY ISSUED BAN ON BAYONNE, GOETHALS BRIDGES
  • MTA TO SUSPEND LIRR, METRO-NORTH SERVICE AS OF 4PM
  • CUOMO: PORT AUTHORITY ISSUED BAN ON OUTERBRIDGE CROSSING

... but the local police announced that anyone using New York roads after that time will be arrested on the spot, like the vile criminal filth they are.