Biggest Short-Squeeze In Over 7 Years Sparks 1000 Point Surge In The Dow

Tyler Durden's picture

There really is only one clip for this...

 

This is the first 3 consecutive 1% gains for S&P since Oct 2011 - most notably S&P remains well below its 50dma...

 

The Dow is up 1000 Points from Thursday's lows...

 

This is the biggest 3-day short-squeeze since Dec 2008...

 

While yesterday was the biggest cover day since Oct 2014 (according to Morgan Stanley), today's squeeze was even bigger...with "most shorted" up almost 5% (all squeezed before EU closed)..

 

As it appears equity market-neutral funds were liqudiating en masse...

 

Before The FOMC Minutes hit the tape, today's (post-midnight) rally was the biggest since at least 2012...

 

Quite a move in the last 3 days...

 

And today soared... with Nasdaq leading the way...

 

Financials and Energy are leading the charge off the lows...

 

VIX is starting to decouple from equity exuberance...

 

Stocks stuck to crude today but decoupled from JPY carry....

 

Credit markets did not seem to be so excited...

 

Treasury Yields soared today until Europe closed, then leaked lower...

 

The Dollar Index ended the day unch but strength in commodity currencies (and JPY) weighed down early gains... the Buy USD in Europe, Sell 'em in New York regime continues...

 

USDJPY leaked after Abe headlines of no more stimulus...

 

Commodities drifted higher today with crude and copper leading PMs...

 

But crude was the crazy one today - rallying notably on complete confusion about Iran's pumping (as WTI's OPEX dominated action, pinning its between $30 and $31)...

 

Charts: Nanex and Bloomberg

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Soul Glow's picture

I just want to drink beer and the god damn Fed is making everything so fucking intense!

JRobby's picture

"We see now when it is too late, what we are up against"

I am more equal than others's picture

 

 

You will be punished for shorting this market.

 

Manthong's picture

Looks like a good time for some SDS.

Soul Glow's picture

I think the bounce is over too, but what do I know?

vq1's picture

we've done it boys! they thought the market was rigged. No, we've fixed it! No corrections, no losers, buy and hold perfected! fully invest in your 401k (if you dont have one, you are unemployed, underemployed, part-time, service industry and are required to perish when you are unable to contribute). In a few years your monetary worth with gain by 100000000%. We will all live like kings together! Wealth, riches, opulence for all!

Silky Johnson's picture

"You tried to short, you little piece of fuck!?! You dumb motherfucker, you!"

thesonandheir's picture

**** COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2 ****

64K RAM SYSTEM 38911 BASIC BYTES FREE

READY

10 PRESS 1 FOR BTFD

20 PRESS 2 FOR SHORT SQUEEZE

30 PRINT 'HAVE A NICE DAY MOTHERFUCKERS!'

MalteseFalcon's picture

This market is going down.

On the way down, they will smash shorts every chance they get.

But don't be confused, this market is going way down.

SILVERGEDDON's picture

' Some muppets were fucked raw today, boys. Cigars all round for the algo wranglers. "

Gawd, I hope they push it over 30,000 this year, and ram gold down to $28.00 an ounce, with silver back to face value for American Eagles.

C'mon Lloyd and Jamie - I know you can get 'er done !

Buy the motherfucking dips you bitchez.

SuperRay's picture

I've got balls of steel. I'm buying SDS and SDOW hand over fist. I'm gonna be rich!! MUUWHOOHAAHAAHAA

glenlloyd's picture

I was just pleasantly surprised to see the barfing clown!

Mr.Sono's picture

Shorts lost there shirts this week. Now longs will lose there dongs next month.

gm_general's picture

Yes, those who stay long through next month.

vq1's picture

DDG

CHAD

SH

 

I AINT SCARED

JustAboutThatActionBoss's picture

Just another Gap up in the morning...4 in a row. And the McClellon Oscillator should then hit 300 for the biggest 4-day move I've ever seen without a pause.

 

Giddy up!

HardlyZero's picture

NIRP at work.

Chasing out all those CB created excess reserves from the majors.

Just talking NIRP causes a response.

Sudden Debt's picture

Nah, it's just not for the weak. Markets never move in 1 straight line. And this crash will take an entire year.

When a market crashes, it's like it's going in cardiac arrest.

And first the montior goes in every direction before it flatlines.

 

bigkahuna's picture

lol - we'll see. I expect to see some breakers start kicking pretty soon...

hobopants's picture

Hey the football got yanked away again, imagine that...

 

Kaiser Sousa's picture

and heres your market wrap for today...

*THE DOW JONES PROPAGANDA INDEX & S&PISS WERE RAMPED FOR THE SECOND DAY IN A ROW ON NO POSITIVE ECONOMIC NEWS OR DATA, AND NO MACRO-ECONOMIC FUNDAMENTAL REASONS WHATSOEVER.

*THE PHONY PAPER PRICES OF THE ONLY 2 FORMS OF REAL MONEY WERE ONCE AGAIN ATTACKED IN PRE-ASIAN TRADING, THEN FOUGHT OFF THE ATTACK ON THE ASIAN OPEN, BUT THEN WERE AGAIN ATTACKED ON THE OPENING OF TRADING IN PEDOPHILE MONEYCHANGER CENTRAL LONDON (CHEERY O’ ASSHOLES!) & OF COURSE NEW DORK.

*THE DOW & S&PISS THEN ASSUMED TRADING COURSE “PICARD - ALPHA -DELTA 2", AKA THE “SIDEWAYS SHUFFLE" FOR THE BULK OF THE TRADING DAY IN NEW YORK SHITTY.

*OF COURSE THE PHONY PAPER PRICES OF GOLD & SILVER WERE AGAIN DUMPED IN THE LAST HOUR OF TRADING ON THE CRIMEX IN THE ROTTEN APPLE ASSISTING THEIR INBREED MONEYCHANGER COUSINS IN LONDON, AND STALLING THE ASCENT OF REAL MONEY TEMPORARILY YET AGAIN.
EXHIBITS A & B PLEASE….
http://www.kitco.com/charts/livegold.html
http://www.kitco.com/charts/livesilver.html

*SURELY JUST COINCIDENTAL FUNDAMENTALLY DRIVEN GENUINE TRADING ACTIVITY WHICH TOOK PLACE PRECISELY AT THE MOMENT THE FRAUD MARKETS RAMPED TO THE INTRADAY HIGHS.

*THEN ON THE RELEASE OF THE FED MINUTES WHICH OF COURSE PROVIDED ABSOLUTELY NOTHING SUBSTANTIVE WHAT SO FUCKING EVER, THE FRAUD MARKETS WERE GIVEN THEIR LAST PUSH ACROSS NEW INTRADAY HIGH FINISH LINES IN CONJUNCTION WITH 2 ADDITIONAL COMICAL ATTACKS OF THE PHONY PAPER PRICES OF GOLD & SILVER IN (YOU GUESSED IT….) THE LAST 2 HOURS OF TRADING IN NY SHITTY.

IN CONCLUSION:
TERROR ATTACK IN TURKEY & POSSILBE WORLD WAR 3 - BUY STAWKS.
CONTINUOUS HORRID ECONOMIC DATA IN AMERIDUMB - BUY STAWKS.
CONTIUING RECORD DEMAND FOR PHYSICAL GOLD & SILVER AMIDST INCESSANT MANIPULATION OF THEIR PHONY PAPER PRICES TO THE DOWNSIDE - SELL GOLD/SILVER & BUY STAWKS.
FED RELEASE OF BULLSHIT MEANINGLESS MINUTES - BUY STAWKS.
END TRANSMISSION.
© DEATH TO THE MONEYCHANGERS  

JRobby's picture

A NEUTRON BOMB IS DETONATED IN THE MAIN AUDITORIUM AT THE NEXT FULL ATTENDANCE BILDERBERG MEETING - BUY STAWKS

Soul Glow's picture

Use http://goldprice.org

Kitco is washed up.  The website above makes it easy to view gold in other currency as well.

Did you know gold priced in rubles has doubled since a year ago?  That's a great trade for an oil country to stash their earnings in, huh?

Kaiser Sousa's picture

Glow

pretty well informed on all goings on in the Physical Gold & Silver markets versus the fraudlunt futures...thanks and yeah converiting the debt based currency proceeds into Gold and Silver for almost anything is the ultimate means by which to preserve and protect ones wealth.

Soul Glow's picture

Are you saying I am?  Or you are?  I think we both are.

Cheers.  And here's some afternoon music :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CTN5nzBqVw&list=PLLdyZxf-DTzVC5v2TvGWVZ...

SILVERGEDDON's picture

Translation from Kaiser soUSA speak to good 'ole 'murrican fer the rest of us.

Every short non institutional mupped and sheeple got royally fucked today. And, even a bunch of institutional players that are not well loved by The Powers That Be - GOT THEIR NUTS HANDED TO THEM ON A SILVER PLATTER.

The world is saved for another day, and we can all stop looking at the clusterfuck in the middle East, the Muslim invasion of Europe, and the political clown show away down south in 'murrica.

It's time to buy into the market again just before the blow off top, so we can get reamed by our lords and masters once again. Repeat after me, you stoopid fucking non Elites. " Please, sir, may i have some more ? "

Rest assured, yer gonna get it all right.

Some day, the workers of the world will unite. Just not right now. They got Face plant, Fucking Twitt, Ass Chat, sports, and beer to deal with, not to mention that remora like phone glued to their big fucking yappers.

matinee55's picture

PUUUULEEEESSSSSEEEEEE! make it so

_ConanTheLibertarian_'s picture

I always like your subtle assessment.

Traderone's picture

Ability to give subtle assessments is all he has left because he is stone cold broke from trying to trade it.

KesselRunin12Parsecs's picture
KesselRunin12Parsecs (not verified) Traderone Feb 17, 2016 5:28 PM

I still kinda like LongSoupLine's subtle assessments

FGH's picture

Kaiser, you are Jim Cramer's evil twin? I'd love to hear YOUR sound effects machine!

BigRedRider's picture

ARF ARF WOOF WOOF...oh wait, that's Killery Clintoon...

fiatmadness's picture

Would be an interesting point of view and one that I could agree with if you didn't have the unfortunate tendancy to link crime to race.

Solid Gold Bubble's picture

Tylers,

When Douche Bank implodes and Jim Reid loses his job, can we get Sousa to do the morning wraps too?

g'kar's picture

the fed is cranking up the presses (off the books of course)

reinhardt's picture

KS,

u really do not get it

and you're loud at really not getting it

r

Mick Shrimpton's picture

Looks like we're back to the "all news is good news" days.

BlueStreet's picture

 This will all be a distant nightmare once 1812 is broken.

Shleprock's picture

The war of 1812 lasted a couple years.  Please let this victory be swift and desicive!

KesselRunin12Parsecs's picture
KesselRunin12Parsecs (not verified) Shleprock Feb 17, 2016 5:31 PM

"Now we could do it with conventional weapons, but that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part!"

 

~Eric "Otter" Stratton

Squid-puppets a-go-go's picture

ironic

the 1812 Overture,[1] is an overture written in 1880 by Russian composer Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky to commemorate Russia's defense of its motherland against Napoleon's invading Grande Armée in 1812.

KesselRunin12Parsecs's picture
KesselRunin12Parsecs (not verified) Squid-puppets a-go-go Feb 17, 2016 5:55 PM

& here I thought it was just 7th inning stretch music.

EndlessSummer's picture
EndlessSummer (not verified) Feb 17, 2016 5:06 PM

I wonder if the mechanisms needed to cause a 'short squeeze' have changed with the advent of HFT ? Can they just dial-up a short squeeze ?