ISIS Stops Handing Out Snickers Bars, Gatorade As Cash Crunch Deepens

Tyler Durden's picture

Late last month, we reported that ISIS has cut its fighters’ salaries in half due to “exceptional circumstances the caliphate is facing.”

Those “exceptional circumstances” include Russia’s unrelenting aerial campaign against the group’s illicit oil trafficking business in Syria. The US-led “coalition” likes to take credit for helping to cripple the oil trade, but in reality it was Vladimir Putin (and Zero Hedge) that put the issue in the spotlight in November.

After Putin’s comments at the G20 summit in Antalya and the subsequent aggressive push by the Russian air force to disable the group’s oil production and transport capabilities, the US was effectively forced to join the party. Asked why The Pentagon hadn’t hit ISIS oil trucks during the 14 months the US has supposedly been bombing the group, Washington responded by claiming that America didn’t want to risk collateral damage. In other words, Washington’s excuse for not targeting Islamic State’s $450 million/year oil trade is that the US was worried about a few truck drivers.

In any event, the group’s ability to fund its activities through the sale of stolen oil has been curtailed and it will be months (at least) before that money can be recouped through the capture of Libyan crude. That means less money for fighters and civil servants.

And it also means no more Gatorade.

And no more Snickers bars.

“The extremists who once bragged about minting their own currency are having a hard time meeting expenses, thanks to coalition airstrikes and other measures that have eroded millions from their finances since last fall,” AP reports. “Having built up loyalty among militants with good salaries and honeymoon and baby bonuses, the group has stopped providing even the smaller perks: free energy drinks and Snickers bars.”

Yes, no more damn Snickers. And when it comes to taxes and utility bills, it’s now “dollars only.” Here’s AP again:

Within the last two weeks, the extremist group started accepting only dollars for "tax" payments, water and electric bills, according to the Raqqa activist, who asked to be identified by his nom de guerre Abu Ahmad for his safety. "Everything is paid in dollars," he said. His account was bolstered by another ex-Raqqa resident, who, like Ahmad, also relies on communications with a network of family and acquaintances still in the city.

That’s exceptionally ironic because it was just last August when ISIS released a propaganda video announcing the return on the gold dinar which the group said was set to replace a worthless “piece of paper called the Federal Reserve dollar note.” Back to AP:

“Circumstances include the dramatic drop in global prices for oil — once a key source of income — airstrikes that have targeted cash stores and oil infrastructure, supply line cuts, and crucially, the Iraqi government's decision to stop paying civil servants in territory controlled by the extremists.


A former Raqqa resident now living in Beirut said Syrians abroad are sending remittances in dollars to cover skyrocketing prices for vegetables and sugar. The resident, whose wife and baby still live in the city, did not want his name used for their safety. One of the other ex-residents, now living in Gaziantep, Turkey, said the road to Mosul was cut off late last year, and prices have risen swiftly — gas is up 25 percent, meat up nearly 70 percent, and sugar prices have doubled.


In Iraq, where Islamic State has slowly been losing ground over the past year, the Iraqi government in September cut off salaries to government workers within territory controlled by the extremists, after months of wavering about the humanitarian costs paid by those trapped in the region. Iraqi officials estimate that Islamic State taxed the salaries at rates ranging from 20 to 50 percent, and analysts and the government now estimate a loss of $10 million minimum each month.


In the Iraqi city of Fallujah, fighters who once made $400 a month aren't being paid at all and their food rations have been cut to two meals a day, according to a resident. The account of the resident, who spoke on condition of anonymity for fear of death at the hands of extremists, was supported by that of another family trapped in Fallujah that said inhabitants can only leave the city if they pay $1,000 — a sum well beyond the means of most in the Sunni-majority city that was the first in Iraq to fall to Islamic State in 2014.

IS is also allowing Fallujah residents to pay $500 for the release of a detainee, the family in Fallujah told the AP, saying that they believed the new policy was put in place to help the group raise money — a system akin to bail.


Mosul residents contacted by AP say IS has begun fining citizens who do not adhere to its strict dress code, rather than flogging them as before. The residents say they believe this is in response to financial problems in part because the group has already confiscated anything valuable, namely cars and other goods that are later resold in Syria.

As an aside, the Assad government still pays the salaries of civil servants in Raqqa. Those salaries are likely also taxed at high rates in order to line the pockets of top ISIS officials and, ironically, to continue the battle to destabilize Syria. 

In any event, one important thing to note here is that to the extent ISIS is running out of cash, it isn't a consequence of one airstrike on a Mosul cash center as AP and other Western media would have you believe. We're talking about an organization that brings in a billion dollars a year here, so destroying a few million in hard currency isn't going to make a difference. 

This is a direct result of Russia's move to decimate the oil trafficking business and that includes the PR effort to put Turkey's role in the international spotlight. 

Going forward, the big question is this: to what extent will ISIS be able to plug the funding gaps by commandeering assets in Libya, where the group isn't subject to Russian airstrikes and where government (to the extent there is a government) forces aren't backed by a major state actor like Iran? 

Or perhaps the better question is this: how long before Libya becomes yet another theatre in World War III?

*  *  *

For those who might have missed it, here's the actual ISIS document announcing the pay cuts:

Islamic State

Bayt Mal al-Muslimeen

Wilayat al-Raqqa

Decision no.: n/a

Month of Safr 1437 AH [c. November-December 2015]

In the name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful

God Almighty has said: "Go forth, lightly or heavily armed. And wage jihad with your wealth and souls in the path of God. That is best for you if you know" (al-Tawba 41) [Qur'an 9:41]. And on the authority of Anas (may God be pleased with him): that the Prophet (SAWS) said: "Wage jihad against the mushrikeen with your wealth, souls & tongues"- Musnad Ahmad: Musnad Anas Malek (11798).

Jihad of wealth has been mentioned with jihad of soul in the Qur'an in ten cases, and in nine of those cases jihad of wealth has been presented beforehand over jihad of the soul, and only in one case has jihad of the soul been presented beforehand over jihad of wealth. And on the authority of Omar bin al-Khattab (may God be pleased with him): "The Messenger of God (SAWS) ordered us to give charity and that coincided with the time I had some wealth. So I said: 'Today I will outdo Abu Bakr, if ever I have outdone him.' So I came with half of my wealth, and so the Messenger of God (SAWS) said: 'What have you left for your family?' I said: 'The same amount.' And Abu Bakr came with all he had, so he said: 'Oh Abu Bakr, what have you left for your family?' He said: 'I have left for them God and His Messenger.' I said: 'By God, I can never outdo him in anything.'" (muttafiq alayhi).

So on account of the exceptional circumstances the Islamic State is facing, it has been decided to reduce the salaries that are paid to all mujahideen by half, and it is not allowed for anyone to be exempted from this decision, whatever his position. Let it be known that work will continue to distribute provisions twice every month as usual.

And God is the guarantor of success.

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Peak Finance's picture

What about the nutella?????

Did they stop that too?

This war will end soon 

AlaricBalth's picture

I'm sure a helicopter drop with pallets of freshly minted US dollars will assist in ISIS's cash crunch.

Oh will soon be outlawed. Sorry boys....

directaction's picture

No problem. The US dot gov will airdrop bitcoins to them instead of cash. 

Stackers's picture

Did you hear the news brother ?

chocolate rations are being increased to 1/3oz from 1/2oz next month !

LieEnforcementOfficer's picture

Do they shop at costco? They are the american devil.

AldousHuxley's picture



sugar laden genetically modified shit rejected in EU redirected at full recognition of retail value for PR purposes.


HowdyDoody's picture

Wow, ISIS is the ultimate product placement marketing opportunity. First Toyota, then Nike, now Gatorade and Mars.

Nutsack's picture
Nutsack (not verified) HowdyDoody Feb 18, 2016 7:22 AM

Why is Obama cutting off Snickers bars and Gatorade now? We must accidentally drop more supplies on their positions again.


Allah Willing ISIS will be resupplied!

Obamahu Snahkbar!

TeamDepends's picture

But we will continue using Snickers Bars in our swimming pool attacks, as the devastation and panic they cause is second to none.

Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

The CIA will mandate Americans have their dollars confiscated so they can helidrop those same dollars to ISIS.  Go Murrica!  We're #1! 

MalteseFalcon's picture

Does it ever occur to Joe 6 pack to ask "where do Snickers and Gatorade come from?" or "who consumes Snickers and Gatorade?"

After that we can move on to how can ISIS have access to banks when Iran was locked out?

Oliver Jones's picture

In the meantime, Wrex Tarr's little ditty "The Terrorist's Lament" has now found its way into my head, and won't stop playing. :)

Never One Roach's picture

"Dear Akhbar,


As-salamu alaykum. The caliphate [in their wisdom] is cutting back on provisions due to severe oppression by the infidels. Please send me a few pair of those Adidas Elite Cushioned socks. You can buy them cheap at Habibi's Clothing Shop three caves down just behind sand dune #64 next to he pre-owned camel lot. The cia forgot to include those with the new Nikes they air-dropped us last week. Please also send a new [clean] pair of Jobst compression stockings; I'm afraid I'll get varicose veins from all the running around they make us do. Those things are so unsightly on ones legs.


Your respectful and everlasting thankful younger brother,




Inch Allah and Allans Snackbar"

Squid Viscous's picture

they need 190 proof Everclear to numb the pain before Putin liberates them from their earthly struggle

buttmint's picture

Never Roach...tell em to head to discount surgical stockings dot com for good compression hose stockings! hahahah

Milton Keynes's picture

They just need a FedWire terminal.

__Usury__'s picture
__Usury__ (not verified) AlaricBalth Feb 17, 2016 10:20 PM

ISIS banks with the squid............and they accept visa/mastercard...

carry on

Lynx Dogood's picture

"What about the nutella?????"  That was to attract muslim women. Average 51 IQ(for muslim men and women, people that you want in your neighborhood according to obama), go figure. The inbreeding is working well for them.

Last of the Middle Class's picture

That's the thing you'll never hear on Fox with Megyn. They're so inbred after years in the sandpit they are essentially a different species and completely incapable of living in a civilized society. They are violence driven to get what they want akin to monkeys chewing their competitors genitalia and faces off when they get enraged. You're about 10,000 years away from them having enough gray matter to live peacefully next door.  Sorry, but it's a fact.

Oldballplayer's picture

Wow, if that is how fucked up they are WITH a Snickers bar, I cannot wait to see who they turn into.

scintillator9's picture

Alluah Snicker bar!!

Wow, Those snickers commercials could REALLY run with this now......

directaction's picture

One of them must've finally noticed the Jewish "U" tax symbol on the wrappers and labels. 

all-priced-in's picture

Let them eat Baby Ruth






CHoward's picture

WTF?!?  No Snickers - I'm outta here!!!  Allahu Akhbar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Creepy Lurker's picture

Thats the second time this week I've been reminded of this:

Its the same mentality.

cheech_wizard's picture

What happened to those gold coins they were going to mint?

Tigermoth's picture

CIA came and took them, just like in the Ukraine.

Nassim's picture

When the Russians send you to Nirvana, you will find plenty of Snicker bars there.

Hohum's picture

Energy drinks are blasphemous!  At least now they are.

hoos bin pharteen's picture

Nothing to see here. Having seen the success stories from the US school system, ISIS has decided to implement Michelle Obama's nutritional guidelines.

Chupacabra-322's picture

Are they still getting Meth?

TradingIsLifeBrah's picture
TradingIsLifeBrah (not verified) Chupacabra-322 Feb 17, 2016 10:42 PM

They've been having trouble getting the Meth over US borders without Americans smoking it up first.

Yung Saver's picture

Lets just aridrop Coca Cola and Snickers by the shitload on all ISIS strongholds. Diabetes will kill them quicker at this rate.


Joe Sichs Pach's picture

Air dropping some Nuka-Cola may get the job done faster

Dragon HAwk's picture

SO i iguess the free hookers... sorry i meant,  5 minute wives, are long gone..?

The Fonz...before shark jump's picture

Without electrolytes they're fucked

NuckingFuts's picture

After a few bong rips of Afgani weed, the munchies are killer. Hummus just ain't gonna cut it. Ahmed needs a snickers, it satisfies.

Which way to the beach's picture

Bet you can't eat just one!


Looks like they don't have a choice now.



Ms No's picture

It's hot in the desert they need the salts and carbs to replenish themselves for 5:00-raping bitches time.   

Government needs you to pay taxes's picture

Nothing refreshes better after whacking off arms and heads all day than a Gatorade and some Snickers.

Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Fonz, they're fucked anyway, if they can't figure out (from YT clips) how to make their own electrolyte drinks, fast and cheap.

Just off the top of my head, I'd mix the following with well water: a bit of salt, a bit of honey, some lemon juice and a ground up multivitamin.  Assuming they drink 4L/day (1 US gal = 3.8 L, 1 Imp.Gal = 4.2 L), you'd want to mix your daily needs of the above into 4L and store in smaller containers for convenience.  And now I'll surf and see what you actually need to do.

p.s. If I had to mix an ISIS batch, I'd add some additional items of course (Arsenic, blood thinner or thickener, Polonium, or juice from select flowers/plants, or psychotropic drugs so that they kill each other).  :-)

jm's picture

If Putin kills all these sons of bitches, I will reconsider my opinion of him.

xrxs's picture

He's certainly not doing it out of the kindness of his heart, he wants to prop up his guy so the Saudi/Qatar to Europe pipeline doesn't get built and Gazprom can maintain it's grip on Europe.  That said, ISIS are the worst human beings ever created, and if Vlad is turning them into ash, he's got my support.  Have no love for Sultan Erdogan, and anything to diminish his grip on power is a bonus.

jm's picture

True on all counts.

Nutsack's picture
Nutsack (not verified) xrxs Feb 18, 2016 7:28 AM

yore raycessists

Tom_Pain's picture

Please!  Send Snacks!

StychoKiller's picture

Hey, perhaps some 'Merkan terr'sts in Oregon can send them a "Bag O' Dicks!"