Dear Bernie, Meet the "Big Mac ATM" That Will Replace All Of Your $15 Per Hour Fast Food Workers

Tyler Durden's picture

Dear Bernie, as you continue in your never-ending "Fight for $15", we thought you might benefit from a simple example of how economics work in a real life, functioning, capitalistic society.  You see, Bernie, labor, much like your daily serving of crunchy granola, is just another "good" that businesses can choose to consume more or less of, depending on price.  And, just to be crystal clear, when the price of labor (i.e. wages) increases, businesses tend to consume less of it.  Finally, our dearest Bernie, when misinformed politicians radically disrupt labor markets by setting artificially high base prices, like your proposed $15 federal minimum wage, then businesses simply stop consuming labor completely and instead replace that labor with this "Big Mac ATM Machine."


So, you see Bernie, pretty soon all those McDonald's workers that you promised a "fair living wage" to make Big Macs, will have absolutely no wages at all courtesy of your "Fight for $15."

Of course, as the Daily Caller points out, the "Big Mac ATM" is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to low-skilled jobs that will be automated as a result of the $15 minimum wage that has already been passed in several states across the country.

Wendy’s, another popular fast-food establishment, announced plans in May to start installing self-serving kiosks at some of its over 6,000 locations later in the year. The chain is replacing cashiers and other low-skilled jobs with computers and automated machines because, as Wendy’s president Todd Penegor told Investor’s Business Daily, it has to compensate for wage hikes.


McDonald’s Europe president Steve Easterbrook announced in 2011 that the fast-food restaurant was planning on “hiring” 7,000 touch-screen cashiers to be installed across the continent, according to CNET and the Financial Times. Easterbrook said it would make transactions more efficient — namely lowering the average interaction three to four seconds each.



So, congrats on getting all those fast food workers fired, we're sure they really appreciate all your hard work. 

Minimum Wage

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Silver Swan's picture

Have it your way, bitchez!

peddling-fiction's picture

Good news! Extra meds the machine slips in your food are for free.

The Saint's picture
The Saint (not verified) peddling-fiction Jan 25, 2017 11:26 PM

Burgers made with test tube created beef.


Taint Boil's picture

They'd still fuck up my order ........

Mr.Sono's picture

Who eats that crap? Liberals, that explains there low intelligence.

Savvy's picture

'there' low intelligence. lol.

OregonGrown's picture

Funniest shit I have seen all night!  


Oh the irony!

Keyser's picture

Just wait until the lefties begin protesting automation in general due to their loss of low-pay, low-skill jobs... There won't be a safe ATM machines, automatic car washes, laundromat or McDonald's anywhere... 

Money Boo Boo's picture

...first they came for 'there" (sic) job!....


are you smart enough to get the rest??

GGuy's picture
GGuy (not verified) xythras Jan 26, 2017 5:24 AM

the best thing is that machines are not niggers, and will not spit in your food or call you honky

new game's picture

they get sick very rarely. otherwise great idea. online auctioning at commercial/dealer level being phased in.

whores beware; 3d bitches coming, with full features...

Citxmech's picture

I notice that none of those machines are set up to take cash. . . 

DaNuts's picture

The dispenser is around arse height, free napkins too.

Abbie Normal's picture

These are just hamburger vending machines.  The burgers are still made by hand in a kitchen so your lukewarm, soggy, Big Mac could still contain the same spit as one purchased at the counter, just without the attitude.

RiverRoad's picture

So it's back to Horn and Hardart.  Hilarious.  We've come full circle!

halfasleep's picture

Yep, I see a stark rise in Luddites

cowdiddly's picture

Here come the grammer Nazi's that could only master the soft courses trying to show superior intellect.

Not realizing just how stupid they look by making assumptions over some guys typo, to a person they know nothing about.

Now THAT'S the real DUMBASSES. I can spot-em(sp) a mile away.

StagStopa's picture

That's "grammar", not "grammer". Jesus christ. Fify, dumbass.


cowdiddly's picture

Another English major cupcake?

I don't run spell check on tweets and blogs and purposely misspell for effect sometimes. It's not a thesis babe.

But, show me a man who jumps to conclusions on peoples intellect over a word or making assumptions and I will show you a man I can beat EVERY TIME.

I will be your dumbass Huckleberry. I play the part everyday while I am end around picking them pockets and cleaning their clock. And, laughing my living loving ass OFF. hehe

And Jesus has nothing to do with it.



HillaryOdor's picture

Misspell for effect.  LMAO! Sure.

You shouldn't need spell check.  People who spend time actually reading things know what these words look like, and I mean reading a books or articles, not reading a headline and jumping straight to the comments to bless the world with your infinite wisdom.

cowdiddly's picture

Man I bet your really smart. You sound so international. Why, I'll bet you even know 3-4 languages. You know big words an stuff, and never use a spellcheck. Now that my man is impressive. I wish I knew you, maybe we could get together some time.

Abbie Normal's picture

It's not about "there" was mistakenly used in place of "their".  It's about the irony that a comment noting the lack of intelligence of someone else contains such a simple grade-school error.  Kind of like saying "me smart, you dum"

cbxer55's picture

Probably doesn't know the difference between THEN and THAN either.  ;-)

There. Their. They're. Which one? Hmmmmmm  LOL

Where. Wear.   Yipes, too many choices.

Offthebeach's picture

We are built to drink from puddles, streams. Eat carrion. It's not what we eat, as is how much we eat.

I get a kick out of food snobs. Yeah I get artisan, hard wheat, live yeast, hand tolled, twice risen, aged ( keep in fridge for 3 days ) and baked in radiant oven is a great bread, but your digestive enzymes couldn't care less than if it was old Wonderbread.

I went through one of the last survival courses run by Col Nick Rowe. You can live off just about anything. And billions of people still do.

I work now construction, all over. I try not eating fast food only because I'm thrifty. I always have hard rolls, butter, cheese and apples in the truck. Costs me a buck a meal, no refrigeration, lasts all week easy. So I save almost $2k/year.

Anyways, Im 60 next year. Still strip and roof every year, ( 70 lb bundle, up ladder, step on to staging, big step on to roof plank then up the roof. I think of it as paid, ghetto mountain climbing.) I wear no eye glasses. I'm starting to be glad I kept active as my desk, office, indoor friends are falling apart from "easy" jobs and slipping into the clutches of the pill pushers.

Just eat less, and move more.

Cynicles's picture

golly gee, you're super cool


will you be my friend?

Offthebeach's picture

I sense sarcasm. Possible bitterness. You might be my kind of people.

Abbie Normal's picture

Panera Bread sandwiches contain more calories and fat than Big macs.

JRobby's picture

Yum! How about a side of Lanz peanut butter crackers with a half life of 86,000 years?

yogibear's picture

All someone has to do is infest the machines with roaches and that will be the end of McDs.

Robots don't care if things are crawing on the food while their wrapping it and giving it to customers.

Nobody For President's picture

Neither do most of the present fast-food workers, from what I have heard.

Keyser's picture

And the people that eat this crap don't care either... To them a cockroach is just another form of protein... 

Debt-Is-Not-Money's picture

And it gives the burger some needed crunch!

land_of_the_few's picture

The machines only output paper order slips. Check the picture carefully! Only enough space for a motherboard behind the screen, no place for a deep-fat fryer or a burger grill, disappointingly :D

Took Red Pill's picture

Yes, to be clear, the machine doesn't make the Big Mac only takes the order. They still need humans (for now). These machines are nothing new. I saw them in Paris 5 years ago. Some restaurants like the "99" are using similar machines at the table. Just like in the self checkout at the grocery & department stores. It does cut back on the amount of labor needed. Sorry to disagree with you Tyler, but I don't think it's Bernie's fault. This technology has been coming down the pike long before Bernie was fighting for $15 minimum wage and would be here regardless of what the minimum wage is.

Offthebeach's picture

WaWa has them to build your own custom sandwich. It's great. Goes right to the maker. Great convince chain.

curbjob's picture

"The machines only output paper order slips. Check the picture carefully! Only enough space for a motherboard behind the screen, no place for a deep-fat fryer or a burger grill, disappointingly :D"

Fuck off with your critical thinking, we're trying to run a fake news service over  here. 


Tyler Durdensky

Bendromeda Strain's picture

The story is not about the ordering kiosks, but nice misfire, fool. Did you hurt yourself?

Debt-Is-Not-Money's picture

The're here!

I don't see an option for spit though.

Bendromeda Strain's picture

You're looking at the wrong picture. Actual burgers are loaded into the ATM, but not cooked in it. Sounds like a $15/hr employee needs to be on top of it.

JRobby's picture

Neither do the "preparers" at your average MickDs

Cynicles's picture

Because the Rotten Ron's employee does care, right?

land_of_the_few's picture

That would be some future model, this one doesn't do food, only paper slips with your order that you selected printed on it. The order gets relayed to the kitchen ninjas.

I suppose I could ask the staff that have made my food in the kitchen and brought it to me "are you Robby the Robot" and see if I get a slap, or their phone number.

Disclaimer - I used these ordering machines already.

The main interesting part to me is the machines don't take cash, only cards. They do have an ordering/wailing counter with actual People for old geezers or The Confused (some people f*ck up the card payment the first time due to unfamiliarity and generate lots of *order cancelled* slips), maybe you can use cash at the Human counter, I am willing to experiment there...

Michelle's Hanging Chad's picture

Not just the meds ... while you sit and and eat, you can have a choice of fries or a telemedicine therapy session with an AI "therapist," who will ask you a few basic questions, diagnose you, and engage you in a "therapy" session to help you feel better about being a social justice warrior living in your Mom's basement at age 24. It's a brave new world indeed ...

JamesBond's picture

Smelling robot tax on the way...


FireBrander's picture


A burger out of a machine? WTF? No WAY!

Have a buddy in the vending business...has some of those small machines that give you a handfull nuts/candy for a quarter...NEVER ENDING BATTLE WITH ROACHES!

Never buy that candy out of those machines...and now, never buy a burger out of a machine.

FireBrander's picture

City is arguing about raising minimum to $10hr...every burger joint in town is paying $9.25 to start...and when Trump "sends all the Mexicans home" AND blocks all the other "refugees", the starting wage will be $15hr all on it's own.

PS> Those of you excited about a raise to $15hr for flipping burgers...that wage will disqualify you for Medicaid...LOL...$15 WILL STOP PEOPLE FROM WORKING ALL TOGETHER unless we FIX our fucked up health system..and by "fix", I mean dramatically drop the cost...$18,000 a month for a drug and doctors write prescriptions for the shit like it's skittles? WTF..that was on the local news recently.