The Revenge Of Comet Pizza

Tyler Durden's picture

Submitted by Howard Kunstler via,

Remember that one? It was about as weird as it gets. A meme generated out of the voluminous hacked John Podesta emails that some conspiracy connoisseurs cooked up into a tale of satanic child abuse revolving around a certain chi-chi Washington DC pizza joint. I never signed on with the story, but it was an interesting indication of how far the boundaries of mass psychology could be pushed in the mind wars of politics.

Sex, of course, is fraught. Sex and the feelings it conjures beat a path straight to the limbic system where the most primitive thoughts become the father of the most primitive deeds. In our American world, this realm of thought and deed has turned into a political football with the Left and the Right scrimmaging ferociously for field position — while the real political agenda of everything important other than sex lies outside the stadium.

The Comet Pizza story was understandably upsetting to Democrats who didn’t like being painted as child molesters. Unfortunately for them, it coincided with the bust of one Anthony Weiner — and his infamous laptop — disgraced former “sexting” congressman, husband of Hillary’s top aide and BFF, Huma Abedin. The laptop allegedly contained a lot of child porn.

That garbage barge of sexual allegation and innuendo couldn’t have helped the Hillary campaign, along with all the Clinton Foundation stuff, in the march to electoral loserdom. I suspect the chthonic darkness of it all generated the “Russia-did-it” hysteria that cluttered up the news-cloud during the first month of Trumptopia. The collective superego of America is reeling with shame and rage.

On the Right side spectrum stood the curious figure of Milo Yiannopoulos, the self-styled “Dangerous Faggot,” who has made a sensational career lately as an ideological provocateur, especially on the campus scene were he got so into the indignant faces of the Maoist snowflakes with his special brand of boundary-pushing that they resorted to disrupting his events, dis-inviting him at the last moment, or finally rioting, as in the case at UC Berkeley a few weeks ago.

Milo’s battles on campus were particularly ripe because his opponents on the far Left were themselves so adamant about their own brand of boundary-pushing along the frontier of the LGBTQ agenda. The last couple of years, you would’ve thought that half the student population fell into one of those “non-binary” sex categories, and it became the most urgent mission of the Left to secure bathroom rights and enforce new personal pronouns of address for the sexually ambiguous.

But then Milo made a tactical error. Despite all the mutual boundary-pushing on each side, he pushed a boundary too far and entered the final dark circle of taboo: child molesting. That was the point were the closet Puritan hysterics went in for the kill. This is what he said on a Web  talk radio show:

     What normally happens in schools, very often, is you have an older woman with a younger boy, and the boy is the predator in that situation. The boy is like, let’s see if I can fuck the gym teacher, or let’s see if I can fuck the hot math teacher, and he does. The women fall in love with these nubile young boys, these athletic young boys in their prime. We get hung up on the child abuse stuff to the point where we’re heavily policing consenting adults, grad students and their professors, this arbitrary and oppressive idea of consent, which totally destroys the understanding many of us have about the complexities, subtleties, and complicated nature of many relationships. In the homosexual world particularly, some of the relationships between younger boys and older men, the sort of coming-of-age relationships in which these older men help those young boys discover who they are, and give them security and provide them with love…. [Milo is shouted down by his podcast hosts]

So that was the final straw. Milo got bounced by his platform, Breitbart News, and went through the now-routine, mandatory, abject ceremonial of the televised apology required by over-stepping celebrities — though he claimed, with some justification I think, that his remarks were misconstrued. Anyway, I’m sure he’ll rebound on his own signature website platform and he’ll be back in action before long.

His remarks about the “coming-of-age” phase of life prompted me to wonder about the boundary-pushers on the Left, on the college campuses in particular, who are encouraging young people to go through drastic sex-change surgeries, at an age before the development of that portion of their frontal lobes controlling judgment is complete. Who are these diversity deans and LGBTQ counselors who lead confused adolescents to self-mutilation in search of some hypothesized “identity?” Whoever they are, this dynamic seems pretty reckless and probably tragic to me. There ought to be reasonable doubt that an irreversible “sexual reassignment” surgery may not lead to personal happiness some years down the line — when, for instance, that person’s frontal lobes have developed, and they begin to experience profound and complicated emotions such as remorse.

Our sexual hysteria has many more curious angles to it. We live in a culture where pornography, up to the last limits of freakishness and depravity, are available to young unformed personalities at a click. We stopped protecting adolescents against this years ago, so why should we be surprised when they venture into ever-darker frontiers of sexuality? It was the Left that sought to abolish boundaries in sex and many other areas of American life. And yet they still affect to be shocked by someone like Milo.

I maintain that there is a dynamic relationship between our inability to act on the truly pressing issues of the day — energy, economy, and geo-politics — and our neurotic preoccupation with sexual identity.

The epic amount of collective psychic energy being diverted from what’s important into sexual fantasy, titillation, confusion, and litigation leaves us pathetically unprepared to face the much more serious crisis of civilization gathering before us.

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VD's picture

the catholic church shall not pass judgement, at least not too harshly.


the pope et al. order hundreds of pizza pies daily.

clymer's picture

please. once this story blows open - breitbarts tweets, podesta's maniacal screams ("You will CALL ME!") - this thing is going to blow open wide.

After all - it's normal to want to play dominos on cheese instead of hot dogs (whatever that means, skippy.)

TahoeBilly2012's picture

Oh no, not Cuntsler again...

(ZH you are pushing it, one Cuntsler a month is the unwritten rule around here...)

Gaius Frakkin' Baltar's picture

The debauchery of shitlibs and kikes is like a bottomless pit.

There's nothing I wouldn't suspect of them.

tmosley's picture

Sorry guys, but when you have politicians openly worshiping Satan, NOTHING is unbelievable.

MalteseFalcon's picture

"I maintain that there is a dynamic relationship between our inability to act on the truly pressing issues of the day — energy, economy, and geo-politics — and our neurotic preoccupation with sexual identity."

How can we act on the pressing issues of the day when government is rife with closted sexual perverts that are easily compromised?

beemasters's picture

"A meme generated out of the voluminous hacked John Podesta emails that some conspiracy connoisseurs...."

The author is living in La-La Land. He is practically saying there's no pedophilia in DC... all consensual sex. Nothing to see here, no child's life is worth the investigation, there are more pressing issues. Move on.

Conspiracy Of Silence / The Franklin Cover-up HQ Version!

Who really cares about Milo??? He's a big boy and can handle it. He will survive. Focus should have been on exposing the real evil perpetrated against the innocent children!!!

Squid-puppets a-go-go's picture

Kunstler; iether you're a coward or you havent really looked into the evidence 

here it is al laid out for you

srsly. Another debunker who refuses to go into the actual evidence? Sounds just like CNN to me

beemasters's picture

" I never signed on with the story, but it was an interesting indication of how far the boundaries of mass psychology could be pushed in the mind wars of politics."

His audacity and arrogance to insinuate he is smarter than those 'conspiracy theorists' !!!
While proof has not (yet) been established and hard to get, there's plenty of evidence - absurdly too many to be ignored.

PTR's picture

Add in that in the last week there were 1500 people arrested nationwide in pedophile rings, including some politicos.


Start small, squeeze 'em hard, move up the food chain.  We're comin' for ya, you bastards.

jefferson32's picture

"I never signed on with the story, but it was an interesting indication of how far the boundaries of mass psychology could be pushed in the mind wars of politics."

Kunstler, you should spend more time looking, and less time masturbating over what great words you'll use to write your next platitudes.

UnclePhester's picture
UnclePhester (not verified) xythras Feb 25, 2017 6:54 AM

Podesta is 'Normal'



Logan 5's picture
Logan 5 (not verified) UnclePhester Feb 25, 2017 9:08 AM

Kuntsler likes his pizza with little slices of Hebrew National hot dogs on top.

joe90's picture

Podesta hoisted on his own petard by his artwork.

detached.amusement's picture

hahahahaha, that's the best assessment of cuntsler I've ever ever read

Implied Violins's picture

The only conclusion I can make from Cuntsler's diatribe is that he's a part of the pedophile tribe and is being paid to belittle it.

Guilty until proven innocent, motherfucker.

Koba the Dread's picture

You're like the mainstream media; you make naked assertions with no substantiation. How do you know that 1500 people were arrested last week in pedophile rings? Could it have been 1499 people? 1501 people? PTR, we'll just call you Mr.MSM.  No documentation, no truth!

GoingBig's picture

You people that believe in Pizzagate are certifiable. Seriously mental

limited man's picture
limited man (not verified) GoingBig Feb 25, 2017 4:17 AM

I'm making over $7k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life. This is what I do...

Bay of Pigs's picture

And yet another troll chimes in....

roadhazard's picture

They have to have something to bitch about, it's the Internet. Even faux Nooze disregards that crap.

Bendromeda Strain's picture

Not saying much, exept that you use corporate media as a marker, thus self identifying as a tool of the first order. Tell me, do you play dominos better on cheese or on pasta? Herb Sandler is still waiting for an answer.

roadhazard's picture

You are a good example of my post.

QuantumEasing's picture

Let us know how prison feels.

More precisely, how it feels to go from .410 to 12g in sphincter size after Bubba is done wooing you.

I would say "you people are evil," but you are not human. You are sociopaths.

golden kafir's picture

Yup the article has no point

Resistance Is Hope's picture

It's a conspiracy theory, it would be unreasonable to research and debate it. Good normies just dismiss conspiracy theories without looking into them! 

roadhazard's picture

Hey Flynn (and son)... "what goes around Comets around."


Laughed my fucking ass off. Yeah, Hitlery sounds worried about comet pizza pedo bullshit. You clowns all need to go take a, "wide stance" at a stall near you.

QuantumEasing's picture

I'm sure you did.

Your species finds suffering amusing.

Go play in traffic.


delacroix's picture

me thinks thou doth protest too much

UncleChopChop's picture

i tried a duckduckgo search for 'politicans openly worshippig satan' and got some very limited and confused results. id be curious as to what you are referring.

ReZn8r's picture

death to them all! Public hangings and impalements.

Resistance Is Hope's picture

Yeah if the elites were running pedophile rape rings, it wouldn't even be their most satanic corruption. Porn being legal, flooding us with illegals and other races from Third world nations, pushing feminism, the endless wars for profit and Israel, pushing sexual perversion, the anti-Christian agenda of the NWO, all these things are just as bad as their pedophilia rape rings.

Chris Dakota's picture
Chris Dakota (not verified) clymer Feb 24, 2017 9:02 PM

Reason why they killed Breitbart.

He said "The Tea Party wants a leader, they asked me to lead and I said Yes."

read my post below for why the Tea Party was so important.

peddling-fiction's picture

Kuntslur. Fuck you, you Juice gatekeeper.


Bay of Pigs's picture

I agree. He has rocks in his head if he thinks this is a "conspiracy theory".

Ignatius's picture

Has he even heard of Jeffrey Epstein, Dennis Hastert, Sandusky or Jimmy Saville, or is that just "conspiracy?"


peddling-fiction's picture

He has but does not rat on his tribe.

chunga's picture

Once Sessions is finished with his top priority, setting up his gov mandated "private" prisons, maybe it will occur to him to find out the circumstances of the Weiner laptop.

joe90's picture

Or read John DeCamp's book.

PT's picture

What we know:
Approx. one week before the election, PizzaGate arrives on the scene.  One week.  Enough time to get into the minds of feeble electors before they forget again.  One week before an election.  When all the big lies come out.  Good enough reason to treat with suspicion.

Now let me pretend, for a minute, that PizzaGate is purely a bunch of convenient lies that were released to sway an election and we "can ignore" it.  So now all the politicians know what is fair game.  In four years time they can release another bunch of lies of similar or greater magnitude.  Is this all right with you HK???  And why stop at elections?  Why not release such a huge bunch of lies whenever you need a distraction?  It's not like there is any down side.  HK:  have you figured out why, one way or another, PizzaGate needs to be investigated yet?  Even if you think it is a bunch of lies, at this point it becomes a fair electioneering tactic.  If lies of that magnitude can safely be ignored then why have media at all?

What we also know with 100% proof:
A bunch of people have a sick sense of humour. - Fair enough, nothing wrong with that.
A bunch of people have a very perverse taste in "art" - Fair enough, nothing wr- well, actually you tell me.
Here, knock yourself out.  Nothing to see here:

I still don't know whether it is better to play dominoes on pasta or pizza (or whatever it was, I can't remember now but if you had actually read Pdo's emails then you would know exactly what we were talking about).  And I don't know much about hankies with maps on them, having left over pizza "for an hour", and I'm not one to finish off pizzas that are a couple of months old.

Perhaps someone should investigate these things ... well actually, some people are, just not HK.

PT's picture

P.S.  I saw the video on spirit cooking.  And I do believe that if you indulge in that shit then, sure as hell, your spirit will be cooked.

detached.amusement's picture

Its kinda like Crack - I do believe that if you indulge in that shit, then, sure as hell - your logic circuit in your head will be fried

acetinker's picture

Not only 'a couple of months old' but 'not expected to survive' and offered at a discount.

Makes ya' wanna puke.

GoingBig's picture

Wtf. How stupid are you?

PT's picture

I would tell you to get an education but you give me the impression that you are actively trying to avoid one.

Bendromeda Strain's picture

And exhibit #1,001 of anons hurling perjoratives with nary an electron of rebuttal to the mountain of evidence presented. But then, what should we expect from filthy chickenlovers...

Bay of Pigs's picture

Did he even bother to read them?