Nordstrom Selling Fake-Mud Jeans For $425

ZeroPointNow's picture

Nordstrom ($JWN), which canceled Ivanka Trump's fashion line after their liberal customers complained, has decided to mock blue collar Americans by selling a pair of $425 jeans with fake mud!

The "Barracuda Straight Leg Jeans" which come with a "caked on muddy coating," have already drawn heavy criticism:

It's for the trust fund baby. It's for the kid who inherits the millions of dollars, the kid who doesn't want to work hard and wants to go into Nordstrom, pay a lot of money and act like they work -Ainsley Eardhardt, Fox & Friends

Described as "workwear" that "shows you're not afraid to get down and dirty," Dirty Jobs host Mike Rowe mocked the jeans "that look like they have been worn by someone with a dirty job... made for people won don't"

The reviews on the Nordstrom website are outstanding...

So (liberal) Ivanka's line is out because of her father's politics, while "fake mud" jeans are in so trust fund babies can pretend to be the masculine version of their preferred gender.


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tx_libtard's picture

Oh man, go back to your safe space Mike Rowe and Andt Swan.  These are stupid jeans that will be bought by stupid people.  I thought libs were supposed to be the ones that feigned outrage at every turn?

Nobody For President's picture

I'm not outraged, much less 'feigning' any emotion.

Initially, it was "You have GOT to be kidding, this is fake. I actually checked the Nordstrom site - yep, there they are. Followed by a kind of bewilderment/incredulous stage - sort of a max WTF? = That a bunch of 'creative people' in Design, Marketing, etc thought this would be a viable product offering at a rather ridiculous price point. 

I think I have come to sort of an end point of sadness. Maybe because I just had a 78th birthday, and I've lived back in the country I grew up in for the last 46 years after a 10 year stint in the city - but how sad that there will actually be people that will buy these things.

Then I realized that my most recently worn set of jeans are in the laundry after a Sunday afternoon tactical shoot at a friend's place - stand/shoot, kneel/shoot, prone/shoot - get up and move, repeat. Got the jeans a bit muddy (a lot, actually) - the work shirt too - the model's t-shirt is clean, ditto his shoes...(Truth be told, I took those jeans and workshirt because they were already pretty dirty from planting bare-root trees the day before - figured I might as well get them really dirty before I washed them.)

The sadness, I think, is that some people, mostly I suspect youngish to middlish age men, will pay so much for fake authenticity. Or have so much money they can mock being a 'worker'. 

But outrage? Naw. I save my outrage for politicians. 

Which reminds me, I need to clean the pistol today...


lakecity55's picture

I like to laugh at the obvious pussies who wear new workboots with no mink oil or sno seal on them.


However, workboots are good when air-dropped at the scene of a dindu riot! They scatter quicker than a covey of quails!

WillyGroper's picture

"Maybe because I just had a 78th birthday"

happy late 78th. ;)

"Got the jeans a bit muddy (a lot, actually) - the work shirt too"

if that junk is being sold for $425, getcha a site & undercut by $50.

Bendromeda Strain's picture

He said... with feigned outrage.

Spine of Ruprecht's picture

Jeesh, they couldn't even apply the "mud" convincingly.  These jeans were hung UPSIDE DOWN before they applied the goo.  Look at how it runs UP the knees!  The mud at the knees should start AT the knees. 

The stains look like a Venti Mocha spill met a Monday outhouse pump-truck.   REAL WORKERS wear coveralls when it gets this bad......

Innovation:  I'm gonna make jeans that smell like a urinal mint; a genuine construction site-smell on a Tuesday morning - just after they hose out the latrine.  Refreshing!

L Bean's picture

It looks like smeared baby diarrhea actually.

thisandthat's picture

Fake stay-at-home-dad jeans; for the hipster that doesn't give a fuck, but likes to pretend he does.

Nobody For President's picture

That does it - Nordstrom is on the list (the United Airlines List) of retail establishments I never have to set foot in again. (Actually haven't been in one since several years before my wife died in '14.) Sort of like REI

Actually, I am blessed by not being ithin a 100 miles of a Nordstum store.

Here is where I get my work pants:

Via the internet - who the fuck wants to shop in a big box store anyway?

lakecity55's picture

Nice pants, but Dickie's works for me.

You have to order the best ones, they are not at Wallyworld.

Citxmech's picture

Dickies or Carharts overall for me.

knukles's picture

Anybody who shells out $425 for these is pleading for an absence of grace and mercy in his life.

thisandthat's picture

I'd gladly pay them 425 fake real paper-dollars Tuesday, for a pair of these real fake work-jeans today.

847328_3527's picture

Nordstroms will start selling black antifa outfits next month; comes with a helmet, mask and stick.

Very fashionable out in Cali I heard.

Debeachesand Jerseyshores's picture

About the same fashionable rage,when wearing "work boots"(preferably Timberlands) to the latest hot nightspots...

Emergency Ward's picture

Cultural appropriation by spoiled beneficiaries of the identity-politics generation to look like they belong to the worker generation.  (sour grapes, obviously -- I would really like a pair, but I can't afford them.  Besides, I never shop Nordstroms.)

besnook's picture

that and a worn flannel shirt makes you look like the man of your dreams-a sissy fag trolling public restrooms for sex.

Spine of Ruprecht's picture

My favorite flannel has a cozy quilt lining.  The public restroom thing is a 70's stereotype, but if that's what you see..... Do you watch a lot of porn?  Does it influence your view of normal, fraternal interactions?  Do you find yourself homosexualizing every guy with a good figure and a flannel shirt?.....

besnook's picture

prejudice is fun unless you have thin skin. sounds like the issue is yours not mine.

Spine of Ruprecht's picture

Bathroom twinks have "issues".  Go wipe your ass, Miss Crisco.

Bendromeda Strain's picture

It's not a stereotype for those who lived near public parks. We tossed M80s through the windows on multiple occasions where night whistlers found each other and made their way off to the bathrooms. Ah, the 70's.

L Bean's picture

This sounds like dialogue from The Greasy Strangler.

Spine of Ruprecht's picture

Were you at Sundance last year?  Next time you see Robert Redford, punch him in the balls for old Ruprecht?  Another bucket-list wish fulfilled....

Kassandra's picture

There is something wrong with you. Get help now.

knukles's picture

"a good 70's stereotype"?   Went out of fashion?   Why, do tell us more!  Just curious.        

Spine of Ruprecht's picture

"Good stereotype".........?  Who said that?


"Curious"......?  There's an internet for that.  Why try to get  a straight guy to explain your proclivities?


"Good stereotype".......?   Who said that?


All I said was I have a "good" figure.

BullyBearish's picture

soon to be seen on mittens romney...

847328_3527's picture

Before you know it, those wide Jerry Garcia silk neckties will be back in fashion:


The ties with saliva and coffee stains on them cost alot more at Nordstroms.




What's next?  Is Monica Lewinski going to start selling pre-stained dresses?

lakecity55's picture

"Make your girl friends jealous at the next girls' night out with this nifty pre-stained blue dress! Comes with fake semen and cigar ash stains! Make like YOU are in tight with a big-shot politician! Starting at 575$ at Nerdstrom's!"

davidhenry's picture

Every pre-stained dress comes with a slightly greasy-looking cigar.

MadHatt's picture

Eesh... Bill is gonna have some work to do...

"I did not have sexual relations with that dress"

Automatic Choke's picture

My thoughts exactly....I wanna buy a blue dress that has factory-installed cum stains.

Richard Chesler's picture

Those pants will match perfectly with my new degree in Anthropology.

Citxmech's picture

Wow!  So am I at the height of fashion after I get my tractor unstuck at the farm?

I'm going to have to stop washing my overalls so I can show-off more. . . 


PT's picture

Stop worrying.  It's just the latest incarnation - the last one being the ripped jeans look.  I wonder what the next one will be.

Yes, fashion is fickle.  Generally speaking, I find that if you're dumb enough to buy something then someone else is dumb enough to sell it to you.

"Women not attracted to my easy life-style becoz I look like a soft wuss.  How to give rugged tough-guy signals without being rugged or tough?  Drink beer to get confidence without having any reason to be confident about anything and wear roughed-up clothes to give roughed-up impressions ... no, not real roughed up.  Wussy women can't handle the truth either.  Just roughed-up looking signals while still clean enough to pass muster at the meat market." - that is the thought process that drives this part of the fashion market.  I am not an expert in these matters so others feel free to criticize / refute / correct me... or agree.

NoPension's picture

Fuck me! I went right into the mud room, got nekked and threw my jeans in the washer. They looked exactly like that.
Hard day's work, and then planted 4 rows of sweet corn in the rain.

I'd have taken $300......

PT's picture

Think about it.  You might never need wash again!

Pladizow's picture

“No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.” - H.L Mencken