"Greatest Evacuation In History" - 650,000 Ordered To Leave Florida

Tyler Durden's picture

In what spokesman Michael Hernandez describes as "the biggest evacuation in history," Miami-Dade has expanded its mandatory evacuations orders to Zone C, forcing over 650,000 to leave Florida in a "traffic nightmare" as Cat-5 Hurricane Irma bears down.

An earlier order included just Miami Beach, other low-lying and barrier island areas and all mobile-home residents, but as the storm grew in intensity and the cone of uncertainty narrowed, County Mayor Carlos Gimenez issued the order this afternoon expanded to Zone C.

The expansion now covers Zone B, which encompasses Brickell, Miami’s downtown area and South-Dade, including parts of Cutler Bay, Florida City and Homestead. Evacuation orders also touch Zone C, which includes parts of Coral Gables, South Miami, Miami Shores and North Miami Beach.

More than 650,000 residents are reportedly subject to the mandatory evacuation order – that’s up from the 200,000 who were asked to leave to areas outside of evacuation Zones A and B, Wednesday.

Downtown Miami is described as "a ghost town"...

As the mass exodus begins...

Lines at gas stations were evident everywhere...

As AP reports on resident exclaiming:

"There was no gas and it's gridlock. People are stranded on the sides of the highway," she said.


"It's 92 degrees out and little kids are out on the grass on the side of the road. No one can help them."

Irma's eventual path and Florida's fate depends on when and how sharp the powerful hurricane takes a right turn, National Weather Service Director Louis Uccellini said.

"It has become more likely that Irma will make landfall in southern Florida as a dangerous major hurricane," the Hurricane Center said in a forecast discussion Thursday afternoon.

The last Category 5 storm to hit Florida was Andrew in 1992. Its winds topped 165 mph (265 kph), killing 65 people and inflicting $26 billion in damage. It was at the time the most expensive natural disaster in U.S. history.

U.S. Air Force Reserve weather officer Maj. Jeremy DeHart flew through the eye of Irma at 10,000 feet Wednesday and through Hurricane Harvey just before it hit Texas last month.

He said Irma's intensity set it apart from other storms.

"Spectacular is the word that keeps coming to mind. Pictures don't do it justice. Satellite images can't do it justice," DeHart said.

Still unsure...Miami-Dade made it simple...

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besnook's picture

dumb fucks are headed north instead of west. the storm will track them all the way to pennsylvannia.

Barney Fife's picture

You'd be a dumb fuck to head west. European model has storm going center-west of the state. 

There IS NO WHERE to go. 

tmosley's picture

Also, there's the Gulf in the way.

thesonandheir's picture

Hopefully it tears down some racist Confederate statues on the way thru the southern states.



Oliver Klozoff's picture

"Hurricane Irma! Where you going after wiping miami off the map?"

"I'm going to disneyworld!"

MozartIII's picture

The dumb asses waited to declare evacuations 2 days before the storm hits. Millions of people.... How fucking stupid can they be?? Never mind, they are politicians....


Prayers for the people now stranded on the roads. 175 mph winds coming.

Yukon Cornholius's picture

Fucking imbicile pulling his golf cart.

The hurricane can't get there fast enough.

SafelyGraze's picture

dear florida evacuees:

you are welcome to stay with us.

we want you.

we will take care of you. 

feed you. provide jobs. schooling. 

our borders are open.

no questions asked.

the people of california


Déjà view's picture

Will miss greatest Homecoming game in history...as Andrew awaits Irma at Miami Hurricanes Stadium...

38BWD22's picture



We are hunkered down in Orlando after a 7 hour trip (normally 5) from Miami yesterday (Weds.).  I can only imagine what it is like for everyone leaving now.  Orlando's winds will be approx. 25 MPH less and get some 3" - 4" less rain, and no storm surge.


Pro Tip: Leave TWO days before you think you "should".

Aurum Vulgi's picture

Many were killed when Houston evacuated prior to Rita ... many more weathered out the hurricane in their gasless cars .. thats why they did not evacuate Houston this time for Harvey .. in the long run it did not save lives 

sincerely_yours's picture

There's a BUMPER STICKER in the back of the Hurricane:

DON'T MESS WITH GOD! http://wp.me/p4OZ4v-3Mc

erkme73's picture

Dancing on graves.  Never miss an opportunity to pump your fucking spam site, right?

Luc X. Ifer's picture

This is real life SHTF, pay attention and learn ppl, now u have the unique chance to see it live.

Manthong's picture


Well you know what’s important when you note that the dude in the lowest left corner of pic number 5 has his golf cart on his trailer.

FixItAgainTony's picture

To be fair, that's his favorite tote cart, the other two he left behind.

Manthong's picture


"It's 92 degrees out and little kids are out on the grass on the side of the road. No one can help them." 

I guess General Honere has his hundreds of helicopters locked up and he is just “stuck on stupid”.

Oh, wait a minute there… this is not red-neck Texas to criticize.

Slack Jack's picture

Record-Setting Hurricanes; Record-Setting Wildfires; Record temperatures; ya think it might be global warming?


So, why is the global rise in temperatures so worrisome?

For one thing, as temperatures rise good farmland will become desert (e.g., dust-bowl conditions will probably return to the American Midwest).

Another major problem is sea-level rise.

Have a look at http://pubs.usgs.gov/fs/fs2-00/

The U.S. Geological Survey people claim that;

The Greenland ice sheet melting will raise sea-level 6.55 meters (21.5 feet),
the West Antarctica ice sheet melting will raise sea-level 8.06 meters (26.4 feet),
the East Antarctica ice sheet melting will raise sea-level 64.8 meters (212.6 feet),
and all other ice melting will raise sea-level 0.91 meters (3 feet).

For a grand total of about 80 meters (263 feet).

So, what does an 80 meter (263 feet) rise in sea-level mean. Have a look at the following map of the world after an 80 meter rise. It means that over one billion people will have to be resettled to higher ground and that much of the most productive agricultural land will be under water. Fortunately, at current rates, the Greenland ice sheet will take over a thousand years to melt and the Antarctica ice sheet, much longer. However, the greater the temperature rise the faster the ice sheets will melt, bringing the problem much closer. Remember, the huge ice sheet that recently covered much of North America, almost completely melted in only 15,000 years (today, only the Greenland ice sheet, and some other small patches of it, remain). Since then (15,000 years ago), sea-levels have risen about 125 meters (410 feet), only 80 meters to go.

The ice sheets have been continuously melting for thousands of years. What is left of them today, is still melting, and will continue to melt. Human caused global warning will cause this remnant to melt significantly faster. This is a big, big, problem.

For HUGE detailed maps of the "World after the Melt" go to:


Global temperatures are increasing. And by quite a lot each year.

2016 is the hottest year on record for global temperatures.

This is 0.0380 degrees centigrade hotter than the previous record year which was 2015.

0.0380 is a large increase in just one year.

2015 was the hottest year (at that time) for global temperatures.

This was 0.1601 degrees hotter than the previous record year which was 2014.

0.1601 is an absolutely huge increase in just one year (at this rate temperatures would increase by 16 degrees in a century).

2014 was the hottest year (at that time) for global temperatures.

This was 0.0402 degrees hotter than the previous record year which was 2010.


The conspiracy to hide global warming data.

The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) is given tax money to make global temperature records available to the public. However, certain people at NOAA continually sabotage this aspect of NOAA's mandate. For example, these people have (deliberately) sabotaged the web-page that delivers the temperature records.

Look for yourself:

Go to the page: https://www.ncdc.noaa.gov/monitoring-references/faq/anomalies.php scroll down to the The Global Anomalies and Index Data section and click the download button and see what happens. Well, you get the message:

"Not Found. The requested URL /monitoring-references/faq/anomalies-download was not found on this server."

I guess that the 2017 data must be truly horrible if they have to hide it away.

It turns out that this seems to be the case; NASA reports that:

July 2017 had the hottest average land temperatures on record.

The new July 2017 record was +1.20 degrees centigrade above the 20th century average (of the July data). The previous record average land temperature for July was just last year. It was +1.10 degrees above the 20th century average.

Did the media bother to tell you about this? No!


Manthong's picture


Oh, M F me..

you are such a waste of bits, bytes and page space.


..just wait another few months and we will be back to global cooling… I cannot remember such a comfortably cool summer in the Midwest here in the last 30 years or so,


webmatex's picture

Rather chilly here in SW France for the time of year, very quick cool down after moderate August, Snow in the Alps, loads of cloud and moisture for a couple of months.

At the moment the windows are open but i am wearing a jacket over a tee shirt.

The Maunder minimum is upon us i fear.

I probably wont make the cold peak in 2025 but sure would like to head over the Pyranees to Spain asp.

I have no experience of hurricanes but think i would have split on Tuesday when it reached 130 mph - get gas and GTFO on a quiet road, it is after all the biggest MF ive ever seen. 

= to how many Kim Bombs?


pods's picture

Shit, my little brother is right in that "catastrophic " slice. Glad he gtfo and gets to watch this one from afar. 


jbvtme's picture

if they stay the gene pool gets stronger

Lore's picture

@ SlackJack: Your cut-and-paste spam is stale and tiresome, and your trolling is impertinent. Please take your droppings and quest for disciples elsewhere.

ThanksChump's picture

He has a phd in earth sciences to pay for.


I wager almost anyone would do what slackboy is doing if they were stupid enough to pursue a degree in that, or astrology. Or economics. All, different facets of one cut/polished turd.

waspwench's picture

Ignore this guy.

Just scroll down.

Offthebeach's picture

Fk off.

You copy->post the same pap.

PS, Sun will expand, eventually, beyond the earths orbit.  Problem solved.

Justawhoaman's picture

It is called GEO-ENGINEERING, you idiot.

snr-moment's picture

keep in mind that our elite are trying to push ALL of us into major metropolitan centers.

weburke's picture

nature and god get the blame, when facts are otherwise

Ajas's picture

Harvey strengthened so quickly that there wasn't time for a sensible evacuation plan in Houston. 

The ECMWF has predicted this exact course for Irma for a week now.  There's no excuse for running out of gas or water or time.

Manthong's picture


I am on my way down to Florida right now.

I will be out on South Beach and will expose the spider web tattoo that is all over my the upper part of my left tit and dare that goddam storm to hurt me…

Actually I don’t have that tattoo and I will not be there but I bet somebody is gearing up for the YouTube video now.   

Aerows's picture

I have gallons of water right this minute, and I'm nearly all the way to Louisiana.  We all learned valuable lessons from Katrina, and will not be caught unaware without gas, food and water.

Go right ahead and say ugly things about preppers.  We'll still be here when you aren't, or we will be saving your ass!

snr-moment's picture

so the epa was going to allow the rapid deployment of multiple above ground gasoline storage tanks?

Socratic Dog's picture

How about if you don't believe a word published by the MSM, or spewed out by government?  Fucking good excuse, I'd say.

How about if you just don't give a fuck?

Antifaschistische's picture

A mass evacuation would be terrible....there is collateral damage to every decision and we rely on individuals to make decisions and live with those consequences.

I'm in Houston and I DID NOT need to leave town.

TuPhat's picture

You are correct Aurum, More people died in the evacuation than died in the storm.  A bus caught fire and killed a dozen or more.  Some had heat exhaustion from sitting in a car on the road with no water.  It was trajic.  Politicians can be counted on to make the wrong call.  Staying in Houston was the safest bet for Rita and probably Harvey as well.  My county had a mandatory evacuation for Harvey due to expected flooding but there was no flood.  I know of four people who died of heart attacks because they were so worried about being able to get out in all the traffic due to scaremongering of politicians.  Be prepared and then take care of yourself and family.  Don't listen to warnings or threats from others.  Watch the weather and make your own decisions.

Justawhoaman's picture

Tell that to the people left in the British Virgin Islands....

SubjectivObject's picture

what is your implied geographic commonality between Houston and Br. Virgin Islands?

Justawhoaman's picture

Tell that to the people left in the British Virgin Islands....

SubjectivObject's picture

the only reportage needed is the NHC site

the entire commercial muddia complex thrives on fear

Uchtdorf's picture

Hey Mr. Bearings,

Fare thee well duing Irma.


Word Origin and History for bearing

 "parts of a machine which 'bear' the friction," 1791, from present participleof bear (v.). Meaning "direction from a point of reference" is from 1630s;to take (one's) bearings is from 1711.

38BWD22's picture



Thanks for the kind words, Messrs. Uchtdorf & Goldstein.  Sounds like the name of a law firm.



We'll leave it all up to The Big Guy...

Aerows's picture

A man was caught in a flood.  A boat came by but he said, "The Lord will save us!"  He took his family up to the attic and the flood waters still rose.  A second boat came by, but he said, "The Lord will save us!"  His family took to the roof, and a helicopter came by, dropping down a rope.  The man's wife and children took it.  He said, "The Lord will save me!".


He arrived at the pearly gates and said to Peter, "Why did my wife and children survive, but I died?  I had faith that the Lord would save us all!"


Peter said, "He sent you two boats and a helicopter, what else did you want Him to do?"